He was surrounded by smiles.
Looking everywhere, yeah, he was indeed surrounded by them, a whole stadium of them, a dream come true in every sense for him…
So why was he feeling so bad about it?
Oh wait, yeah that guy writhing on the floor in agony alongside his cards was the reason why.
Zarc thought that smiles and happiness was the byproduct of wonderful and happy situations, like people having fun in a duel, doing cool tricks to impress the audience, maybe sandbagging to make it look like he was losing only to make a comeback at the last second, you know…normal stuff.
And that both duelists would be happy in the duel, not one suffering and he feeling like the scum of earth.
He didn't enjoy it, he wasn't a sadist…ok, maybe he was 1/4th of a sadist, don't ask him how he pulled that fraction, he just knew and Starve Venom pointed it out to him.
But the point was that he wouldn't go so far as to violently injure someone and their monsters like that in a duel, that wasn't his intention! Ok, it kinda has been for a while…but that's because he wanted to make the audience smile! Being happy! That was his goal in life, his dream! Yeah he never made them smile before, at least not as much as the incident happened and that's why he started doing it on purpose…
Some dream huh?
He didn't know what he was doing wrong before, why didn't people smile back when he was keeping it safe and wholesome for everyone, was he just not fun? Or were people the problem? He certainly questioned what was wrong with people enjoying this, one thing is fiction when nothing bad happens to a real being but this is an actual human being being hurt…and their monsters, but given he was the only one that could see them it obviously didn't register on their mind.
He looked at his monsters, it was clear they didn't enjoy this either, because the increased violence in their duels means their adversaries fought back with as much intensity to defend themselves, he couldn't blame them, even if their attacks hurt.
But it's part of the reason he was worrying about losing, not just because he was getting far into the tournament, but because the possible payback he might get, deserved as it may be.
Once again he watched them hauling off another person to emergencies, he made a reminder to himself to send him part of his winnings as an apology, same as he did every other duelist he injured like that.
Normally Zarc would enjoy the praise he was getting despite his doubt…but now it's like he doesn't get that feeling of satisfaction.
He quickly made his way out of the stadium, he really did not feel like talking to someone right now aside from his monsters, he wanted to be alone…and by quickly he meant parkouring his way out.
A bit extravagant, but it's this reason why he was so good at moving alongside his monsters and part of the reason he enjoyed Solid Vision so much.
And while he hadn't summoned them, he could feel his dragons and other monsters trying to do the same, even if most of them could fly.
Zarc soaked in that feeling, of fighting alongside them, doing tricks and trying to make people smile…back when they thought they didn't have to hurt people to do so.
They really wanted to do that alongside him, all of them, even Starve Venom who did have a bit of a sadist streak himself, all of them wondering what went wrong, weren't they enough? Or maybe humanity was the problem.
It was an idea that went through their heads, after all, what kind of sick person derived enjoyment from someone making someone else suffer? Let alone so many of them?
But Zarc decided to nip that in the bud, he knew better to assume everyone thought the same, he has seen people think his duels are horrifying, not just his opponents.
So what was the reason? Was it just the sadists that came to watch duels? Was violence really that entertaining to watch? Was his non violent duels that boring to watch that the colosseum style duels were far more interesting in comparison? What was it?
Zarc landed on some rocks and watched the ocean from there alongside his monsters, wondering if he would get some answers from there.
"...Well, things didn't turn out the way we thought they would, didn't they?" He said.
His monsters nodded and agreed with him.
"Yeah…at the start I wanted to both win the tournament and make everyone smile while at it, the Ultimate champion entertainer…now I'm not so sure, we came so far to just drop out…but I don't like continuing like this and you guys neither"
They all either agreed or looked ashamed and tried to pretend they were ok with it.
"Look guys, you don't have to lie to me, I know you don't like this, I don't wanna make you guys do something you don't like"
…
They all tried to keep silent….
Then Odd-Eyes spoke.
"But it's your dream…"
"...A dream that require others suffering like this isn't a worthwhile dream to me"
It hurt to say that, because he really did want that, making other people smile, making them happy, spreading and sharing that wonderful feeling to everyone, even if only making their day a little brighter was his goal in life…
But this wasn't the way to go about it, wasn't it? Sure he was getting it…but he didn't like his way of doing it.
Was he being too picky about it? Too ungrateful? He finally found a way to do what he set out in life, shouldn't he be enjoying it?
…Or was he being too lax about it? Shouldn't he be more strict? Should he stick with his principles more?...Did he even have principles?
…
"...I think I will stop with the violence, actually try to make them smiles like I tried at the start"
"You think that will work?" Asked Astrograph Magician.
"I can try…if it doesn't work…I'll see what happens…I just don't want it to continue like this…"
His monsters all looked between each other and then to him.
"Whatever you do, we're behind you all the way" Said Odd-Eyes.
Zarc smiled, he really had the best friends he could ask for…
"Thanks guys…"
The day of the next duel arrived, his opponent was as terrified as the audience was excited for this duel…and both were utterly surprised by his non-violence.
Zarc fought like he did in the old days, with tricks, parkour, jokes and his monsters, without hurting the duelist or his monsters (at least too much in the latter case)...it felt like a breath of fresh air, for him and his monsters, the duelist didn't feel the need to retort just as violently too!...
If only the silence and even disappointment of the public weren't there.
They all looked at him, expecting the Demon Duelist who brutalized his opponents, not the entertainer from the beginning, some even murmuring with each other…
That hurt far more than any blow in a duel…
Despite the heartache, he won his fight, he beat his opponent non brutally…but it didn't seem to matter to him, because the public did not care…
So that's it huh, they didn't want him as an entertainer, they wanted him as the demon duelist, the one who shows them violence and power they have never seen before…
His monsters looked at him, worried for his crushed dreams, almost wondering what he would do next.
"H-hey"
Zarc turned and looked at the duelist he just beat, he seemed a bit shy approaching him.
"Just wanted you to know that I'm grateful for this duel, I was scared going in, no offense…but I ended up having a great time! Thank you!"
And he smiled at him as he politely stretched his hand…
…
Zarc shook his hand, looking at him, then the public, to then turn his back to their hands…
…
"It's no problem, glad you enjoyed it"
"Are you sure you're ok Zarc?"
"Yeah, don't worry Odd-Eyes, same goes for all of you, I'll be fine…"
His monsters nodded as they we're about the Begin their next duel, the audience doing a rather muted cheer for him and a normal one for his opponent.
His dream probably crashed and burned by this point, he won't be able to make everyone smile like he wanted to, you couldn't please them all…or even the majority, without doing things you didn't want.
But at the end, he decided that he didn't want to do that, he didn't want to give up parts of himself in something he didn't want and slowly die inside until he snapped.
He was not a toy! He was not a doll that existed to please people however they wanted to! He was not a court jester and neither were his monsters!
He was a king! A supreme king and his court! They all worked together because they wanted to and enjoyed that! So what if they didn't like how he dueled his way? Then they could suck it up!
He was still gonna win this championship, they came too far to back down and they still wanted to win, what he would do after that? He didn't know, he would find out when he got to it.
Because they were not some mindless instrument for violent entertainment. Even if they weren't well liked or appreciated, they were still humans and monsters and they choose to remain like that.
Zarc looked at his opponent who was still a bit unsure but less frightened than most of his previous ones, he would have to work to undo the reputation he brought to himself and the colosseum style dueling be brought to the table.
But he'll manage, it also gave him something to work towards.
Zarc smirked. "Ladies and Gentlemen! I hope you're ready, cause the fun is about to start!"