Akira…

Akira Akira Akira Akira…

Kurusu….

Kurusu Kurusu Kurusu Kurusu…

…

The air in her dark room was stale. It was too cold outside to open the window, but enough of the chill snuck its way into Makoto's living space that the temperature it settled at wasn't entirely unpleasant. Besides, there was enough movement inside her head already; The sounds of a bustling city on top of it would just tick her off.

Makoto was barely able to make out the clock on her bedside table, it read 8:30pm. Her sister Sae wouldn't be home for a while, so the brunette had the whole place to herself. On nights like these, the high-schooler would usually occupy herself with revising her schoolwork or a TV show or a book or something, but today there was a tension in her chest that kept her aimless on her unmade bed. Even her go-to hot shower had done nothing. Instead she just lay there in her old PJs, eyes staring absently at the blurry, blackened silhouette of a an unmoving ceiling fan.

…

Akira…

Kurusu…

…

"Akira is very handsome, don't you think?"

Makoto rolled onto her side, her first movement in a while. The conversation she had with Haru at the student council room the other day scratched at her brain from the inside. Makoto didn't see him in that way…

"You asked him out."

No! well, yes, but…

"You're going out with him."

…

Yeah, she went out with him…

…

"I'm the worst…" Makoto whispered. Her lips were as dry as the air that hung motionless around her.

Makoto shut her eyes, the heat in her chest intensified. But why? Everything was proceeding precisely according to plan. Haru would confess to Akira, she'd explain that her crush on him is what distracted the girls on Tuesday, the two would start dating, and everyone would be happy! All of her problems would be gone, just like that!

Makoto considered herself smarter than most. Some might call her narcissistic or vain for it, but she always prided herself in her ability to get to the bottom of problems and remain level-headed during times of confusion. That tightness in her chest. She got those surges of stress whenever a problem seemed too much to handle, so it's not like she wasn't used to dealing with them. Makoto had always just ignored them and focused on thinking things through with all she had, they would never persist for more than a few days at most and she would be on her merry way before they had time to really register as much more than an annoyance.

But something about these specific twangs under her ribcage felt different. Try as she might, she could not put it into words, or even into thoughts. All she knew is that whenever she thought about this stupid crush Haru had made up, her body reacted unfamiliarly and her head filled with fog. She sighed and brought her legs up to her stomach. The red-eyed girl could feel dampness on the skin that touched the blankets, the room was starting to warm up a bit. She couldn't bring herself to open the window.

*BVVVVVV BVVVVVV BVVVVVV *

Everything was so quiet that the buzzing of her smartphone almost sounded like a chainsaw, startling her to attention. She let it ring a couple more times to compose herself before dragging herself over to the nightstand and answering it. Probably just Sae asking her to buy some more cereal on her next trip back from school.

"Hello?"

"Mako-chan?" it was a familiar tinny voice, Haru's.

"H-Haru! Hey! What's up!" Makoto took a sharp breath inwards.

"Hi, Mako-chan! How are you?"

"Good! Good! I uhh, just got back."

There was a small pause.

"Great! How did it go? Were you able to get back onto Akira's good side?"

"Y-yes, I think so. It went pretty normal, all things considered."

"That's wonderful news! See? I told you. Akira wouldn't get mad at you over something like that. He's well aware of your competence as his second-in-command."

Makoto relaxed a little, Haru was easy to talk to, she always had been.

"Yeah, I guess you're right. Looking back, I probably overreacted and panicked a bit."

"No, no. It's fine, everything turned out okay in the end, didn't it?" Makoto could almost feel her smile through the line.

"…" Makoto nodded, more at herself than she'd realized.

"So, listen… Speaking of Akira, I uhhmmm…" A tension found its way into Haru's voice. "Can… can you come to the school rooftop tomorrow morning? A-around 8:45?"

"Sure! I'll be there. Is everything alright?"

"Yes! Nothing to worry about. Just… I invited Akira to come, too. I want to try being less passive, l-like we talked about, and… yeah…"

"And you want a wingman? Or wing-woman, I guess." Makoto teased.

"Heehee," she giggled through the phone, "when you say it like that it sounds like some secret spy mission, but, y-yes… Please!"

Makoto was surprised by how quickly she hopped onboard with the idea. Was it guilt? Over going to that movie with Akira? Giving Haru the wrong idea? Yes, surely, that must have been it. It was the most logical explanation. Makoto would help Haru as well as she could to make up for it.

"Alright, it's a date then! B-between you two, that is. I'll help you however I can."

"Thank you so much, Mako-chan. I knew I could count on you! I need to go, but I'll see you tomorrow!"

"Night, Haru."

"Goodnight, Mako-chan!"

Makoto switched the screen off and let her hand fall onto her chest. She took a deep breath, her palms were damp. As eager to help as she was and as thankful she was that Haru asked her, she didn't like this. There was an awkward air in that conversation that wouldn't have been there a few days ago.

'No, this is good!' Makoto shifted positions on the bed, shoving a pillow between her legs to prevent her knees from knocking into each other. Yes, starting tomorrow, Makoto would be able to bury these weird feelings once and for all. Once she made up her error to Haru by helping her with Akira, everything would be fine. Haru was gorgeous girl and a wonderful person, she would sweep Akira off his feet and that would be the end of it. No more distractions during explorations, no more schoolyard crushes getting in the way of their operations, and nothing to drive a wedge between Makoto and her cherished friends anymore.

Akira and Haru… They would be a good match for each other. Haru was kind and gentle, Akira was forward-thinking and direct. They'd make a cute couple and Makoto would be privileged to see their love blossom. She could envision them arriving to team meetings together arm in arm, like a stereotypical couple right out of some manga; calling each other cute names, holding hands, hugging, kissing…

Having sex…

She gulped, her throat was dry. She could feel a subtle tingling between her upper thighs. Stupid hormones, why was she thinking about such gross things now? Her time of the month must be coming on, or something…

She checked the clock on her phone. 8:55. Still early-ish… She squeezed the pillow a little with her legs. When was the last time she'd done it? It had been a while…

…

No, too much work. It never felt as good as she wanted and it always took way too long to find even a half-decent video. Plus, the shame afterwards was soul-crushing.

…

Akira…

Kurusu…

…!

Makoto bolted upright on her bed. What despicable gutter was her head trying to wander into!? A terrible, terrible thought tried to make its way up to the front of her mind. She shoved it down and away. Makoto didn't want to think about it or consider it or acknowledge it in any way. The logical parts of her brain acted on their own and told her she would regret it if she gave it an inch.

Between the sweat that started beading up on her skin and the unclean thought she almost had, Makoto pondered hopping into the shower again for another scrub-down. She felt dirty.

How draining. A wave of fatigue came over the girl. She forced her train of thought onto mundane topics to try easing herself to sleep. The air in the room was stale and lukewarm.

Makoto slept with the window closed that night.

A/N:

Well, there we go! One more down, a bunch more to go. This chapter comes directly after chapter 5 of the original work so it's more of a brief epilogue to it than anything, hence the far shorter word count. Feel free to go back and reread it for a refresher!

Now that all of the story's important bits are set in stone, chapters should feel a little snappier. It's still going to be long, though, so I recommend you buckle up. Things are going to get a little heated!