Hello again, my fellow freaks!
I've come back from my little vacation, and I went straight to my laptop, a new story idea fresh on my mind! It's going to be a series, and I'll be uploading it between NERWAC chapters.
The rating will be M, because the story might get quite raw and I have a feeling there will be…ahem…adult content, in the future chapters…And I will warn you, it's angst all the way through. So be prepared! Anyway, I hope you enjoy this first chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it! Let me know what you think with a little review!
The next chapter will follow in the days to come! Now, enjoy :)
"Are you not hungry?"
Her eyes found his in question, whilst she fidgeted with the food on her plate- a meal she hadn't yet touched.
"You've not touched your breakfast.", he repeated, motioning to her plate with a bop of his head.
"I-", his wife began, clearing her throat before continuing."No, I'm not hungry quite yet. I'll have something to eat with my tea later."
Charles nodded absentmindedly, studying his wife's face.
"Is something the matter?"
"What?", she blurted.
He held her gaze, waiting for an answer.
"Why would anything be the matter?", came her timid answer after a few short seconds and she hated how rude she must've sounded."I better get ready, we wouldn't want to be late. There's a lot to do before the party next weekend."
And with that she was out of the room and Charles was left alone with his almost-finished breakfast, as well as hers that had gone untouched.
…
Beryl Patmore walked into the hallway when she heard the backdoor open and close. It was a sign that the butler and housekeeper had arrived for the day.
"Good morning.", she smiled, drying her hands on her apron.
"Good morning.", the butler greeted her, leaning to help his wife with her coat.
He was relieved when she let him and didn't pull away- it meant she was not angry at him.
" Now that I remember, Anna was looking for you, Mrs. Hughes. She told me to let you know if I see you first."
The housekeeper remained quiet but flashed her friend a smile as a thank you, and made her way towards her sitting room.
Beryl caught the butler's gaze, saw him watching after his wife, a slightly forlorn look on his face.
"Trouble in paradise?"
Her question seemed to draw the man's attention to the cook.
"No, Mrs. Patmore. I wouldn't say that.", Charles said matter-of-factly.
She nodded and turned on her heels to head back into the kitchen to get on with her day. She made a mental note to check on the housekeeper later.
…
The hours passed by fairly quickly, the staff busy with preparations for the upcoming party in honour of lord and lady Grantham's anniversary.
Lunch was one of a quiet manner, only a few hushed conversations going on here and there. Everyone had noticed the shift in their superiors' moods, and, by any means, no one wanted to get on their bad side.
"I wonder what's wrong?", Anna worried, whispering the words to her husband so no one else would hear her.
"I wouldn't know."
"I'm worrying for them."
"I'm sure whatever it is will be resolved by breakfast time tomorrow.", John said, giving his wife's hand a squeeze under the table."You know Mrs. Hughes doesn't like to leave things halfway done."
"I suppose you're right.", Anna sighed, flashing her husband a faint smile as she turned back to her meal.
…
A knock on her sitting room door brought the housekeeper back to present. She'd been lost in her thoughts, her paperwork sitting forgotten on the desk before her. She shook her head, cleared her throat, and called out with a firm "come in".
The door was opened at her words and the form of the cook was revealed.
"Mrs. Patmore, can I help you?"
"I could ask you the same question, Mrs. Hughes.", the cook said, getting straight to business.
Her words seemed to take the housekeeper by surprise.
"Whatever do you mean by that?"
Beryl let out a sigh;
"You've been acting strangely all day. Don't think no one's noticed because it's not true."
"I don't know what you mean, Mrs. Patmore."
"Don't you?", Beryl asked.
"I really don't. I only didn't sleep very well last night, that's all."
"Well-"
"I don't know why you feel inclined to concern yourself with this, Mrs. Patmore. If there was something wrong, I'd be sure to tell you."
The cook stared at her in that moment, and she felt a tug at her heart. That was not entirely true.
"I only want to help.", she mumbled.
"I know you do, but everything's alright, Mrs. Patmore."
A silence fell between them, and it took the cook a moment to speak up again;
"If you're sure."
"I am quite sure. And now, I think we both have things to do."
The conversation had clearly come to an end.
…
Later that night, after supper had been eaten and the family taken care of and the servants sent to bed, the Carsons could finally set out to head to their cottage.
They walked in silence, only the occasional wind through the leaves breaking it before the forest fell silent once again.
When they got to their cottage, Charles helped his wife out of her coat and hanged it next to his.
"Would you like me to make you some tea?"
He turned his face towards her at her question.
"I think I'd prefer sherry, honestly. If you don't mind, of course?", he said gently, not wanting to sound mean.
"Of course not. I'll pour you a glass."
"Won't you join me?", Charles looked at her, not receiving any answer."Please?"
She seemed to contemplate his offer.
"Go light the fire in the sitting room and I'll bring the sherry.", his wife said eventually, showing him a small smile as she turned to head into the kitchen.
A few moments later she joined him on the couch, as she had promised, with his favourite sherry poured into two glasses.
It was not unusual for them to just sit quietly, holding hands before the fire and just enjoy the other's company. However, tonight, Charles felt like there was something lingering in the air. And he didn't like it…
"Are the preparation for the party running smoothly?", he tried to start a conversation, hoping she'd not ignore him.
"I think so. It's certainly nothing I can't manage."
"Of course not, I didn't mean to imply nothing of the sort."
"I know you didn't. And I didn't take it that way."
He took a sip of his sherry.
"You know, I have my next half day on Thursday.", he began, deciding to change the subject.
"Mhm?", she hummed.
"I thought I might change mine, take it when you have yours- on Wednesday; we could maybe go to York for dinner. Spend some time together, maybe?"
He watched her fidget with her wedding ring.
"We have a lot to do before Saturday.", his wife reasoned.
"I know but…I'd just like to spend some more time with you. There's nothing wrong in that."
He brought his hand to caress her cheek, feeling her relax into his touch.
"I'll ask lady Grantham about it when I get the chance.", she simply said, her voice quiet.
"Good."
She leaned to place her, now empty, glass on the table next to the couch.
"I think I'll head upstairs, I'm tired."
"I'll lock up and join you.", he smiled.
She stood up, not daring to cast another look at him, and headed towards the staircase. She was so very tired.
…
It was the middle of the night and the sound of his wife emptying the contents of her stomach in the bathroom had woken him up.
He'd come to stand in the bathroom doorway as he watched her bend over the toilet, wearing a very concerned look on his face. Something was seriously wrong.
"Elsie, what's wrong?"
"Leave me alone, Charlie-", she was trying to catch her breath.
Of course, she knew he was there.
"I will do no such thing. You're ill."
"Please, just…"
Charles knelt behind her, pulling her braid from her face just as another wave of nauseous came. He made soothing circles on her lower back with his hand as he waited.
"How are you feeling? A bit better?"
She gulped.
"A bit, yes."
"Then let's get you back to bed."
Without waiting to hear her protest, he helped her up from the floor, his other hand pulling the cord to flush the toilet.
"You can wash you face a bit and I'll get you a glass of water, alright?", he suggested, walking her to the sink.
She simply nodded and Charles left the room to fetch that glass of water. He was back in less than a minute, having ran up the stairs.
"Thank you.", Elsie said as she gulped down the water.
"I hate to see you like this…"
She shook her head, finding his hand and giving it a gentle squeeze.
"I think I've eaten something bad, or I might've caught something in the village."
"Should you-"
"I'm sure I'll be better in the morning.", the smile on her face was not real, he noted and looked at her doubtfully."Really, I'm fine."
"Very well, if you're sure."
"I am. Let's go back to bed.", she insisted, leading him back to their bedroom.
They settled under the covers, Charles holding her close to his chest with his arm over her stomach. He fell asleep almost immediately, but his wife laid awake for the rest of the night, consumed by her thoughts.