🌸Cherry Blossom Palette🎨
🌸Chapter 7: The Artist and the Amazon🎨
Written by EmtenDew
Edited by P. serrulata
Author's note:
For some reason P. serrulata likes calling Gamo-chan the "Amazon", but I guess I can see why.
I was concerned readers would take issue with the fact Naoto had a major encounter with Sakura AND Gamo-chan in the same four day stretch. My editor said it probably wasn't a big deal. A lot of things happened over the weekend, good and bad. He also feels that Naoto will inevitably have meetings with Gamo-chan as she comes to terms with her place in the grand scheme of things. It admittedly serves narrative purposes as well.
On a personal note, I'm going to miss the other work my editor did when he wasn't helping me or driving a tractor for 15 hours straight. I enjoyed his Reddit essays on Nagatoro characters a lot, but he doesn't plan on doing any more of them. This girl is saddened. But I'm thankful for his support with this story and wish him a good harvest. There's no way I could do this without him.
Please look at the Q&A section I set up at the end of the chapter. Ask us anything, and we'll add another section in the next chapter. I would be happy if you ask questions.
Please enjoy what I wrote.
June 24, 2018
Clunk!
The vending machine near the school's entrance coughed out a beverage.
"Here you go, Paisen," Maki Gamou handed Naoto Hachioji a bottle of fruit punch.
He took the bottle but protested, "You don't have to buy me anything, Gamou-san…"
She fed a couple more ¥100 coins into the machine, selecting another fruit punch for herself, "Don't worry about it, Paisen. I insist."
Naoto noted her despondent expression, on full display moments earlier when she'd entered the art room, hadn't cleared up in the slightest.
In fact, she looked worse.
"C'mon," Gamo-chan sighed and began walking in the hot, sunny afternoon.
Naoto was quick to follow.
She led him to a quiet corner of the grounds, butting up against the school's main building. He'd only been back there a handful of times on trash duty or when he wanted to read or eat in a quiet place.
There wasn't much back there: an emergency exit door and—for some reason—a single bench. The lighting wasn't great, its fixtures only turning on at night, and the sun would need to be directly overhead to properly illuminate this dark corner.
It was nicer in the early mornings and the late afternoons, however, as it heated up like a brick oven at the Sun's zenith. Outside of high noon, it was typically quite a bit cooler back there than out in the open, if a little stagnant due to lack of air circulation. After a good rain, such as the one on Friday that dumped several centimeters of precipitation onto their city, it could take days to dry out, so it didn't always smell the best and could be a little muddy, as was the case currently.
They were the only living souls present, it seemed.
Gamo-chan made sure of this, having examined the couple of nooks and crannies in the walls, and exhaled, "Good… it's empty."
Naoto knew what she meant. More than once, he'd gone there, only to find a couple making out, and he'd always left in a hurry. Rumor had it that members of the basketball club had received head back there a few times, and he didn't disbelieve it.
It was a nice spot if one or one's party could be left alone and undisturbed.
Gamo-chan made her way to the bench, dropping her schoolbag beside it. Sitting down, she patted the spot beside her.
Naoto obliged her.
Noticing she'd set her fruit punch on the ground near her feet, he was hesitant to just start drinking his.
Gamo-chan must've noticed, because she said "You don't need to wait for me… Drink up."
She didn't say anything else for some time.
Though he wasn't all that thirsty, he cracked the bottle and took a drink.
"…"
"…"
For a time, Naoto just watched Gamo-chan:
Sitting on the edge of the bench, she rocked on the heels of her shoes, appearing to slowly rise and fall as she pushed herself backwards and allowed herself to slouch forward. Her hands were clamped at her hips, around the same edge, so firmly that her tendons stood out.
She was… anxious…
Forward and back, forward and back, she undulated as a fishing bobber might.
Most telling, though, was her face: her jaw was clenched, her eyes were unfocused, and her brow was furrowed.
Despite this, Naoto let his mind wander a while; it was nice to just turn off the brain occasionally.
But the silence didn't last.
"Paisen…" Gamo-chan's voice came gently.
She'd addressed him so softly that it didn't startle him, even after a long hush, "Yeah?"
"Your guy friends call you 'Nao-kun'…" she stared towards the sky showing between the buildings. "So, is your given name, like, 'Naoka' or 'Naota' or 'Naoto' or something? I've never actually seen it."
What…?
"Uh, it's 'Naoto'…" he answered. "Why?"
"You know what my given name is?" her face was steady, but her normally blazing eyes were decidedly gloomy.
He was pretty sure he knew, "It's 'Maki', isn't it?"
"Yep…" she replied. "Only my family calls me 'Maki' though."
"…"
She asked, "You know how many girls named 'Maki' there are?"
He could guess, and he'd almost certainly be correct, "Thousands, I bet… Maybe tens of thousands…"
"I'm sure," she figured. "How many families have the name 'Gamou'?"
"Not many," he responded. "You're the first person I've met with that name."
"Yeah…" she let out a heavy sigh. "I think we're the only family in this part of the prefecture with that name, but don't quote me on that."
"…"
"I mean, I don't hate my name, not at all," she went on. "'Maki'… My grandma gave me that name. But there are plenty of Maki's in the world… Actually, there were two other girls named 'Maki' in my kindergarten class."
"Huh…"
"To tell us all apart, some kid started calling me 'Gamo-chan', and it just stuck. There was no mistaking that name."
"I guess…" he allowed.
"…"
"Why?" Naoto finally asked.
"Why what?" she began rocking again.
"Why are you telling me this?" he'd been wondering, and he just didn't get where she was going.
She mulled, "…I dunno, really… but…"
"Yes?"
Well, she had a "fuller" answer for him, though it still seemed a little short of complete:
"I'm not asking you to call me 'Maki', but I don't like the '-san' all that much. Could you just call me 'Gamo-chan'?"
That's what she was on about?
But he merely assented, "Alright, Gamo-chan…"
For the first time since she'd shown up again at his clubroom, she smiled, closing her eyes relaxingly, "Thanks… That's better…"
Reaching down, she picked up her drink, cracked it, and immediately drained it. Taking only a moment, she dropped the empty bottle beside her bag, smacking her lips at the syrupy sweetness.
Naoto didn't mean to be rude or short or anything negative, but he had to know, "So… what's going on, Gamo-chan? What did you want to talk about?"
She returned to rocking forward and back, and it was easy enough to see she was choosing her words.
Abruptly, she ceased rocking, staring at the wall ahead of them, "I wish I hadn't done that, Paisen…"
He was sure enough what she meant… that she was upset about being nasty to her best friend, though Nagatoro hadn't picked up on any of it.
There was plenty he could say, but for now, he'd just listen, "…"
"Did you see how Sunomiya looked at me…?" Gamo-chan sounded tired. "She had me figured out."
There was no mistaking Sunomiya's aspect… but "figured out"?
Naoto wasn't sure of everything, but, "Don't worry about Sunomiya. She's probably not going to hold a grudge…"
In reality, he wasn't sure of that either; a lifetime might not be enough to figure out Sunomiya.
Gamo-chan blew out a ragged breath and spoke, "That's not what I'm worried about. What I mean is… she knows why I did it."
"…" he just went with it.
"I know it's not my fault Hayacchi watched the video; if she doesn't wanna do something, she usually won't…" she measured. "But I wanted it. I wanted her to suffer a little, and I knew she wouldn't be able to handle that too well.
"What I said back there was mostly crap… to you and Hanacchi. It wasn't about being called 'chicken' or some score we got in a karaoke bar, though it hurt some when she called my singing 'squawking'. The only '95' or higher I've ever scored wasn't on a test in school but in karaoke.
"I mean, sure, it pissed me off a little that I couldn't just sing a duet with Hanacchi without Hayacchi trying to butt in, but that wasn't it either."
"Nope… that was all just an excuse…"
Naoto finally felt the need to say something; he felt pulled in, "So… why then?
"I just wanted to watch Hayacchi squirm… that's all."
…
"…Why…?" was all he could come up with; it wasn't a condemnation, but a question.
"I've been jealous," was Gamo-chan's simple, melancholy response.
It struck Naoto.
"Jealous?" he felt like a parrot, unable to come up with anything on his own.
"Yeah" she admitted, her gaze still focusing on some spot on the wall. "She doesn't seem to know how good she has it, and… I've been feeling really jealous of her lately. She's my best friend, and I'm jealous."
…What…?!
To Naoto's utter shock, he beheld a mist forming in those pumpkin-colored eyes.
Is she gonna…?
Gamo-chan's voice began to waver, tears visibly rising. "I really hate that about myself, Paisen…"
He tried to find words—something—but they failed to come out, "I… Ga…"
She didn't get much further, "It's been a while since…"
She tried to continue but suddenly choked up. With a small gasp, she brought her hands to her mouth, and a few tears ran down her cheeks. She sobbed a brief moment in gentle shakes.
…?!
Naoto was under no delusion that Gamo-chan was anything but a normal girl, but seeing her weep… It was slightly shocking.
Nonetheless, there was no reason to hesitate, and he didn't.
Fumbling, he quickly pulled out a pack of pocket tissues and stretched his arm to her (while reflexively keeping the rest of himself as far away as possible). Realizing she hadn't seen them, he held them closer, and noticing the pack, she hastily began to pull out wads of tissue paper.
Another round of waterworks surged out, and she attempted to muffle her cries, burying her face in the bed of tissues in her hands.
Naoto leaned forward to get a look at her, but she turned from him.
"Oh, please don't look at me right now…" she whimpered, embarrassed.
Not begrudgingly, he sat up straight and merely parked himself there a moment… It had crossed his mind to put a hand on her, if only to let her know he was there, but he didn't think it would take, so still he remained, turning over in his mind what was best to do.
Nothing immediately came to mind…
A heavy snuffle indicated to him things were "clearing up", and he listened.
Most of her weeping having subsided, she was able to form words.
"You know how sometimes you just need to cry?" Gamo-chan dabbed at her cheeks, looking at the ground between her feet. "It's just gonna happen, and there's nothing you can do to stop it? It's coming out at some point, no matter what you do?"
"Yes," guardedly, Naoto answered. "I can relate…"
"I knew I was gonna, but I just… didn't wanna do it in front of anybody…" she sniffled. "I can't ever let Hayacchi… Yoshi… see this."
He knew better than to ask "why". Or rather he didn't need to; he knew why.
She had an appearance to keep up…
Unaware of his thoughts, Gamo-chan resumed, "Other than all the times with my dad and once with my little brother, I haven't cried in front of a guy since I was a second grader."
Because I'm not a threat… Naoto, turning surly, couldn't help but immediately feel this way; it was a bitter thing.
That was why she was always so unguarded in some ways around him… She-!
She uncovered her face, sitting up, and turned to face him, "But it's okay… because I was sure you'd understand…"
"…?!" he felt a… "warm chill" run through his body, stunned at what he'd just heard.
And she was looking right at him, not hiding!
Trying to smile for him, she said wetly, "Normally, I'd just do this in some stall in the girls' room, into my gym clothes or a towel so no one could hear, but I just had to talk to you… and I knew you wouldn't mind if I wound up crying. That's why I brought you here."
"…!" he couldn't believe what he was hearing.
Where was this coming from?!
"You don't see it as a weakness, Paisen…" she shone. "No matter who it is, I knew you'd understand… If more guys thought like you do… I don't think I'd feel so afraid…"
"…?!"
This was some otherworldly stuff… but it wasn't. Gamo-chan was just an ordinary girl…
"…"
"…"
Gamo-chan continued speaking, finally, "The other day… do you remember what you said to me?"
Naoto voiced, frankly and far less awkwardly than he might, "I'm, uh… not sure. We talked a lot on Thursday."
She snorted, a tiny laugh escaping.
"Sorry…" he hung his head.
"It's okay," she leaned forward, moving so he could see her. "You said 'going to the beach was different without me there' or something like that."
He had said that or something like it, "I guess that makes it sound weird… but I meant-"
She cut him off, "I know what you meant, Paisen."
And something told him Gamo-chan did know… She knew that he meant that in the most positive sense imaginable.
"It made me happy," she sniffed heavily, congested after her upset. "It made me really happy, Paisen."
"…" Naoto just watched her.
Blowing her nose, she said, "It made me happy because I finally realized something."
He was curious, "And what's that?"
Shuffling in her spot, she seemed hesitant to say it; she stifled a cry, managing, "Sometimes… I… worry that you hate me…"
This didn't mesh with him; it had no grounding for him, "…Why…?"
This didn't make sense to her; she thought it was quite obvious, "Because I was always such a piece of garbage to you after we met…"
"Oh…" Naoto felt a bit stupid for not considering this.
She was pretty awful to him occasionally… and it hurt sometimes, but…
"I could never hate you, Gamo-chan… any of you!" he felt like a simpleton and blushed, saying this, trying to hide his face. "Looking back, it just never bothered me all that much. I mean, even though all that happened, and it sometimes scared me and stuff… I knew you didn't dislike me. Really, a lot of it was fun…"
"…" incredulous, she eyeballed him, looking him up and down.
His face red, he sat up and regarded her, laughing nervously.
At that, she at once began chuckling and crying again, "I don't get you sometimes…"
His flushed face only worsened, "I'm… sorry you were carrying this with you… I am…"
He really was…
"It's not your fault, Paisen," Gamo-chan brushed her hair out of her face, slick with tears and snot.
Yet again blowing her nose, she leaned against the bench's backrest.
"It's something I've worried about since last year," she conceded, comforted. "I'm just glad that you don't…"
Naoto wasn't sure what to say to her.
Luckily, he wouldn't have to say anything.
"I'm sorry for bringing you back here, Paisen…" Gamo-chan hiccupped, rubbing her eyes. "Give me a couple minutes, and we can head back."
Don't be sorry…
It's alright…
Don't be ashamed…
Naoto wanted to come up with something meaningful, but he was pulling mud, "Okay… whenever you're good."
Some man he was…
Or so he thought.
Q&A Section
I'm resorting to a list of potential questions to ask writers, but there are some good ones. My question: what's the first book that made you cry?
ED: Where the Red Fern Grows did it to me. My class read the book in fourth grade, and I cried right in class.
PS: Bridge to Terabithia. When it's shown just how much the female protagonist's parents relied on the male protagonist's love of their daughter, the fact she loved him, and what a positive impact he had on her, that was rough. Of course, I didn't think a thing of it when I was a third-grader.
I was in my twenties before some of those meaningful stories hit me in such a way, meaning I don't remember having cried over a book until I was 22. Big, tough, 200 lb., beer-drinking, meat-eating, fraternity-man, six-gun shootin', 22-year-old me started crying in my college library when I reached the last couple chapters of Bridge. It was one of those snowflake-type of things during finals-week where they bring in therapy animals and put out coloring books for the students. They also put out childrens' books, and Bridge was among them. It's not a long read.
Incidentally, the 2007 film-adaptation largely sucked—relying too much on CGI and not the very powerful story's ability to stand alone—but the scene where the main male character saw the main female character for the last time was heartbreaking, knowing what was coming. You can see the specific moment he falls in love with her, watching her run home in the rain. Those kids did a fine job of acting.
Please look forward to the next chapter! Thanks for reading!
Check me out on Reddit: u/EmtenDew