🌸Cherry Blossom Palette🎨
🌸Chapter 11: The Pathos of a Gal, or "The Backswing"🎨
Written by EmtenDew
Edited by P. serrulata
Author's note:
ED: I wish I could say we were moving on with the story, like advancing the timeline, but there's a little more to go.
Ask us anything, and we'll add a Q&A section in the next chapter. I would be happy if you ask questions.
Please enjoy what I wrote.
June 24, 2018
Making his way home, Naoto Hachioji couldn't believe the last four days, much less the afternoon he'd just finished.
He'd already been feeling this way, and what had just happened with Nobuo Takata—Sakura Inori's ex-boyfriend—moments prior, sort of cemented the idea. Maybe it was stupid to think as he was, but it still readily came to mind, as it had earlier in the day.
It was impossible to get the notion out of his head:
He'd been through several events best described—to him—as "anime clichés".
Rescue the girl and take her home… get the girl to confront her problems…
The tough girl shows some "unworthy" guy her worries and regrets… he offers her tissues when she starts boohooing …
Two guys talk about troubles with the same girl… one is reassured by the other…
Indeed, two of these events involved the shedding of tears—one mutual and the other individual—and the third maybe came close.
What's more, there were two occurrences—in the same couple of hours—of someone enacting the old "begin to walk away, stop, turn, and say something profound to the main character" thing.
Gamo-chan had affectionately thanked him, calling him by his "proper" title, given her age and station, and Takata had pretty much given him the go-ahead to catch Sakura on the rebound, going so far to say she was far less than disinterested in him.
She really likes you, Hachioji. I wasn't sure if you knew or not…
Yeah, right… Naoto just couldn't wrap his mind around the concept.
Takata had things figured wrong… Sure, Sakura trusted him, and they were friends, but she was about as intent on him as he was on his mother walking in on him during a session of onanism…
He just chalked it all up to "this kind of stuff happens sometimes", and he tried hard to believe it.
He didn't live in some anime…
…
…
…
Not far into his journey home, Naoto came upon the ice cream shop he and Nagatoro had visited a few times. The stuff there was nothing special, but it was still pretty good, and he enjoyed it whenever he had it… especially when it was with Nagatoro.
While he'd normally pass it without a thought, he'd treated himself the week before a few times, going home as early as he did. With that miserable sunburn he'd picked up the Saturday before and his inability to comfortably sketch or paint or enjoy sitting still for a good week, a little something cool and sweet was highly appealing and served as a small morale booster. But the thought of a dish soft-serve seemed out of the question at the moment; it was dinnertime and already after 6:00 p.m.
Speaking of his evening meal, his parents—often working from dawn to dark—had messaged him earlier:
Home late tonight. Reheat the beef and vegetables.
He was on his own for dinner, and this was par-for-the-course. It was normal, like it or not. But he'd have something nice to eat, study a little, shower, maybe read for an hour, and go peacefully to sleep, dreaming of nothing of any real substance, and with any luck, putting the day's—and the weekend's—drama behind him.
That sounded like an okay night…
Reaching a fork in the road, turning left would bring him home, and-
What?
Naoto stopped and confirmed he was seeing what he thought he was seeing.
Leaning against a rail at this little junction—south-west leading home and north-west leading to a family-style restaurant near the coast he and the girls frequented—was Sakura.
She gave him a decidedly weak smile, "Hi, Senpai-kun."
"Sakura-san…" he certainly hadn't been expecting to run into her. "What are you doing here?"
Another cliché? The girl waiting for him on his way home?!
What am I thinking? Naoto scolded himself. Stop living in a cartoon!
"What I'm doing here?" Sakura countered, seemingly tickled. "You know our routes home split off once we get to the ice cream shop."
That's right… Nagatoro and Sakura always take a right after the shop, and Gamo-chan and Yoshi take a left, as he did.
And walking alone with Gamo-chan and Yoshi—despite the briefness—could be a little bit strange, but that's a whole other story. Shoot, it was rare they all took off at the same time anyway, their afterschool schedules differing so much.
Naoto gulped, giving Sakura a response, "I guess."
The gal straightened up, facing him, that faltering smile still pasted to her face. "Senpai-kun, will you join me for a sundae?"
"…Huh?" he couldn't have heard that right.
"Join me for a sundae, Senpai-kun," now sauntering towards him, she kept up the "cheerful" expression, but it was obviously joyless.
He tried not to stare, but it was difficult not to. With her tired-looking eyes, reddened as they were—not to mention the bags she'd developed underneath—she looked as if she'd been crying and not sleeping for two days straight. She'd looked pretty bad, showing up to the Art Club that afternoon, but her demeanor was now nearly corpse-like.
This again… She'd again had time to "rally herself", but it was markedly less effective this time around.
Naoto felt stumped, despite the simple request she'd given.
Still refusing to drop the false liveliness, Sakura persisted, nearer yet, "Senpai-kun, it'll be my treat… Please…"
Boy…
The closer she got to him, the worse she looked.
What now?
She stopped, now only a meter away, "Senpai-kun… Please…"
It was unsettling… Naoto could pick up on every visible physical characteristic the gal presented, and it would be a challenge to recall having seen a more defeated-looking person.
He'd had enough sweets for one day, given the two juices on top of everything else, but he didn't want to pass up her offer. Something—and not just her pathetic façade —told him it was best to join her.
"Okay," he simply answered.
…
…
…
Over a small sundae, Sakura "blissfully" straddled the horsey spring rider she'd sat upon, leaning to-and-fro, a creaky sproing sounding from the base of the rider whenever the gal moved, "After I was done in the ladies' room, I was gonna go back to the Art Club, but Sunomiya-chan was blocking the hall. I already had all my stuff, so it wasn't a big deal."
After visiting the ice cream shop, Sakura had insisted they go sit down at the kids' park across the street.
Naoto was nursing his tiny dish of strawberry soft-serve—having insisted Sakura buy him the cheapest thing on the menu if she was to buy him anything—and sitting on the adjacent spring rider, a truck in his case, "…"
Her "jollity", already pretty messed up to see, was finally beginning to creep him out…
"Then she shooed me away," Sakura explained, her pseudo-smile rife with an "amused discomfort" at the thought of the encounter. "She said 'the men are not to be disturbed'."
Sunomiya had stuck around…?! How much had she heard?
Well, probably not much, if anything, and Naoto wasn't overly concerned if Sunomiya learned a few things he felt better staying secret.
He knew she'd only remained to keep Sakura away from Takata and himself, giving them privacy. Sometimes, her "interference" was welcome.
"She pulled me all the way out here…" the gal simpered, scraping the last bit of hot fudge from her dish. "She wouldn't let me stay any closer to the school than this. I bet she was watching me until you showed up."
He wouldn't doubt it…
Naoto found himself scanning their surroundings.
"But nothing was said about me hanging around here," she added, setting her emptied dish and spoon on the ground. "So… I decided to wait for you."
To reiterate, the smile Sakura presented, combined with her dulled eyes and exhausted features… Yeah, Naoto was officially creeped out.
How can she keep this up?
Although…
"I can't believe you and Nobu-kun ended up talking like that," at this, she became more somber, ultimately unable to hide what she was actually feeling; she tightly gripped the handles through the horse's ears, halfheartedly rocking forward and back once. "I never imagined that would've happened…"
"…" Naoto kept working his way through his treat, on edge as to what might happen next.
"I just can't stop thinking about what you two might've been talking about…" she murmured, conversing more to the air than with her senpai. "What he told you… what you told him…"
Naoto hadn't said much beyond the fact he'd given Sakura shelter, but whatever had gone on between Sakura and Takata—closed off in the clubroom—may have been a completely different story.
Contrary to popular belief… I'm a virgin, Senpai-kun~…
Please! No! Don't, Senpai-kun!
I'm worried about you!
Naoto just couldn't get the unpleasantness encompassing the culmination of Friday night he'd shared with her, and it had him going woozy all over again.
That surprised me—a lot—learning she was a…
I never expected things to get that far there anyway, but if they had… well, it would've been my first time too…
He shuddered, besieged to imagine what had gone on while he bought Sunomiya that apple juice.
How much did she tell Takata…?
…
Naoto watched as Sakura leaned forward, wrapping her arms around the muzzle of her steed.
It sure didn't look comfortable…
"Oh, Senpai-kun…" she blew out a breath forlornly, gazing away and resting an ear on the plastic mane.
Outwardly calm as was achievable, still as a statue, riding her pony, Sakura abruptly turned fidgety and quickly stood up.
Naoto started at her suddenness, a spoonful of strawberry almost going down the wrong tube.
Sakura's knees collided with the spring rider, and she waved her arms for balance.
"Sakura-san!" Naoto exclaimed.
Still straddling the piece of playground equipment, she leaned over, forehead first, and rested a few seconds on her hands. Her wobbling evened out.
She glanced towards him, "Don't worry. Stood up to fast. Head rush…"
Before Naoto could respond, Sakura hiked her leg and staggered off her mount, meandering away.
Naoto, wanting to keep close, wolfed down the last couple bites of his soft-serve. Immediately regretting eating so quickly, he grappled with his brain freeze as he stumbled off the truck.
Realizing Sakura had left her trash on the ground, he bent over and stacked her container with his own. Normally, he'd be upset—despising litterbugs though never having the guts to confront them—but it was obvious his friend was a little off at the moment, so he wasn't about to dwell on it.
Trotting to the nearest trashcan, he dropped in what he had, watching where his kohai was going.
Turns out, she didn't go far, paddling over to the swing set, where she sat on a desirable-looking swing… the kind of swing kids argued over who got to use it, how long someone had been swinging, whose turn it was, etc.
Sakura, staring at the divot in the sand between her feet—caused by hundreds and maybe thousands of little heels kicking off or dragging their owners to a stop—began to morosely move herself forward and back.
He sat in the swing next to hers. Automatically, he tried to push himself to begin swinging, but it was a kids' swing, and there was no escaping the ground with his long legs.
Sakura, notably shorter, still had trouble getting any real momentum going, and she settled to just rock.
Wanting to find something to say, Naoto wracked his brains, but he needn't have made the first move.
The gal turned to him, that strange, untrue grin back in force, "I really liked swinging when I was little, Senpai-kun. I'm kinda big to do it now, but I still like just sitting here sometimes."
Naoto decided he'd heard plenty; he'd just talk to her.
"Sakura-san, please… that's enough," he hadn't said more than a couple words to her since she'd ordered their ice cream. "Are you alright?"
It was direct yet gentle, and Sakura got the message.
Hanging her head, she let out a long, shaky exhalation. A moment later, she nodded.
Whether the nod meant "yes, I'm okay" or "yeah, you got me" was lost on Naoto, but it certainly leaned to the latter, considering the next.
"I know I can't fool you…" she met his eyes, hers subdued. "I don't know why I even pretended to try… Habit, maybe…"
"…" he let her take her time.
"I dunno, Senpai-kun…" she said honestly. "I really don't know…"
It wasn't promising, but at least she was speaking and not bullshitting him.
"I…" she began. "I feel like just crying and crying, but I'm all cried out, Senpai-kun…"
"…"
"It's like there's nothing left," she stared forward. "I wanna cry, but it's just all gone…"
…
"I can't stop thinking about it…" she swayed slightly. "Nobu-kun was… He was so kind to me… He really liked me, Senpai-kun, I could tell…"
…
"I'm… really angry at myself for what I did to him…" her hands clenched around the swing's chains.
…
"I… hate myself for what I did to him…"
Don't say that…
Don't hate yourself.
I think he's forgiven you… in a way…
But Naoto said none of these things.
She needs to vent a little…
Unexpectedly, Sakura lightened.
"You and him talked for a while…" she turned to her senpai. "Did you like him?"
This seemed a strange question, especially after what she'd just said—not to mention it seemed she was asking his approval—but Naoto thought he understood, "I think he's okay, Sakura-san. I feel kind of bad for expecting him to beat me up or something when he showed up."
"He's not a bad guy, Senpai-kun," she was adamant. "He isn't at all."
"I can definitely see that."
"So why did I do that to him?" her high fell back to a low, and it was low. "Why did I do that to any of them…?"
Naoto had no answer; he wished he did, "…"
…
"When Nobu-kun came into the clubroom, I just blanked out," Sakura steeled herself. "I couldn't… I couldn't say anything to him."
Naoto mentally bawked at the image of Sakura standing there, before Takata, floundering.
He still wasn't sure why he'd decided to intervene on Sakura's behalf…
"Thank you… Senpai-kun, for helping me," Sakura's voice came as soft as a breeze. "Thank you."
What compelled him to do that?
He wanted to say "you're welcome" or "I was glad to do it", but it wouldn't have been honest; he also wasn't sure how he felt about that.
Regardless, he had his own piece to say, but he had no idea when to spring it; it didn't matter, really, "Friday night… I'm… sorry things got so out of hand like that… I'm sorry I was so rough with you. I wasn't thinking… It just kind of snowballed…"
After a few seconds, she responded, "I'm… really sorry I spit in your face…"
"…"
"And I'm sorry I said all those nasty things to you…" she toed the sand.
You think you're gonna become a man tonight, huh~?
Naoto kept replaying that whole exchange over and over again in his head; he couldn't stop.
"I think I started to like him back, Senpai-kun…" Sakura switched gears quickly, back to Takata.
Naoto felt turned around.
It certainly was sudden… But he'd been the one to slip away.
"I even tried to be myself around him," crossing her legs at the ankles, she couldn't quite keep off the ground without tucking up. "I think he did like me… just for being me… What a mistake he made…"
"…" Naoto hadn't forgotten her wish…
I just want someone to like me for me…
"That's never happened before… And I really blew it…" Sakura concluded.
She hung her head.
Naoto thought she might be gearing up to cry again, but the stream indeed seemed to have run dry.
Instead, she slowly revolved towards him. The look on her face couldn't be called happy or anything close, but she seemed more at peace.
She inhaled deeply and blew it out, "Thanks for listening to me, Senpai-kun…"
He attempted to respond, finally inclined, "Uh… sure."
Then, for the first time since Friday night, she showed him a smile… a real one, "That's okay… There's not much to say to all that…"
He decided he agreed, "I suppose."
…
"Could we talk about something else, Senpai-kun?" she proposed.
Naoto welcomed this. He'd expected her to wander to other areas of unhappiness, but it appeared she'd moved on. He realized she wasn't over any of that, and she wasn't casting it aside, but she'd had enough wallowing.
It just came out of his mouth, "So… what about?"
Sakura chirruped, color rising in her cheeks, "That's what I like to hear!"
Naoto tried to mirror the happy expression, "…"
"What I said before about the swings wasn't crap, Senpai-kun…"
"Yeah?"
"I really do like to just sit on the swings," she straightened her legs before her, clicking her loafers together, her loose socks bouncing about. "Every once in a while, I'll find one high enough for me to use or one with a chain I can shorten up."
He'd go with this, not that he was merely humoring her, "This is nice. I don't think I've been swinging since… maybe since I was 12. Too tall…"
Sakura brightened some, and she responded in turn, "There are taller swings than these in town, Senpai-kun."
Noncommittally, he replied, letting the corners of his mouth turn up, "Tall enough for me?"
"I dunno about that," she giggled. "Tall enough for me."
"But this is nice…" he commented. "Sitting."
"It is."
"…"
Sakura decided to share something.
"My favorite thing when I was a little girl was to dip my toes in the sand…" she blithely smiled, reminiscing. "Dig down to the cool, damp stuff underneath… It still makes me feel better when I'm feeling blue."
"Yeah?" Naoto encouraged.
"Mm-hmm," he poked the tip of her loafer into the media dolefully, sighing. "Not today though…"
Naoto hadn't forgotten what she'd been through on Friday.
"How are they?" he'd been wondering. "Your feet?"
"Still a little beat up," she observed, again arranging her legs before her. "It wasn't fun putting shoes on the rest of the weekend and definitely not this morning… This morning, I accidentally popped one of the blisters…"
"Yowch…" Naoto put in.
"Yeah, that pissed me off…" she pissed and moaned. "It set me back this morning, and I was almost late for school. I'm glad I had a spare set of loafers… They're a little big on me, but I got them, like, 90% off at this outlet store."
He hadn't noticed she had different loafers, but they did look newer.
"It was still hard just pulling these on, but my normal pair were just too small," Sakura commented. "I look like a mummy under there, but they'll heal up in a couple days."
"That's good… the part about it healing, that is," he stated. "And no problems with the manga café getting your stuff?"
She shook her head "no" at the question, but…
"Don't even get me started on my dress shoes from Friday," she grumbled. "I couldn't even get them on. I had to wear those wooden slides all the way home."
Sakura became quiet a moment, and Naoto just observed, slouching over in his own swing.
The girl—keeping her legs straightened in front of her—attempted to pump her upper body to get a little momentum going.
She was trying to swing.
But without the use of her legs—far too long to avoid scraping the ground—to help generate force, she couldn't get anything going.
Yeah… any kid knows you need to pump the whole body for a proper swing… Tuck up on the backswing and extend out straight on the up!
It was as if the little stars and planets in Naoto's head properly aligned … Maybe that was the reason.
Perhaps he'd seen it in a movie or an anime or some manga book.
Why Naoto came out and asked, he wasn't entirely sure, but it was probably simple enough.
Sakura just wanted to swing!
And he wanted her to smile.
"Want me to push you?"
She jumped a little—lost in her thoughts—and looked to him, "What?"
Please look forward to the next chapter! Thanks for reading!