A light breeze crossed the thick grey mist, moving the dark grassblades, sharp and more dangerous than expected for noobs. The branches of a few barren trees creaked, but he still could not feel any wind caressing his pale skin. Just like his button nose could not smell at all the poisonous scents rising from the marsh, nor his feet and ankles could sense the poisonous muddy waters he was walking through.
Shitty devs! Groaned the man inside his mind.
He could not remember why or when he cursed them for the first time, nor who was the first player to come up with what by now was the most popular way to complain about the game developers.
Not that the origins of the insult mattered to the heavy armoured human as he headed towards solid ground. It was visible already, thanks to his bad eye: flat and perfectly cut green meadow in the middle of the Grenbera Swamp. A sight one would not expect since dangerous monsters roamed the landscape, making it one of the most dangerous places across the nine worlds of Yggdrasil.
What annoyed him were not even such monsters, given all visible items were Divine Class he had crafted in the last few years.
Demonwing Geta, despite looking like simple but elegant black slippers with crimson winglets, had three powerful skills: Cursed Kick, a passive ability which highly debuffed speed and resistance to physical damage, Demonic Haste, which gave incredible speed boosts once every three minutes for seven seconds, and Leap of Unfaith, that negated all fall damage. Additionally, it possessed Fly, allowing him to leave the ground at will and instantly, without wasting time and mana to cast the actual spell.
Cutter I and Cutter II were twin katanas, their sharp blades of a blue so light it was transparent, while the hilts were different. Having been used to give the deadly blow to the Celestial Lord of the Sixth Heaven, Cutter I's hilt was tightly wrapped in a piece of the golden cape of the World Enemy soloed by the mysterious samurai, who barely survived such a fight but obtained the loot of a lifetime. Cutter II's hilt was instead plainly visible, its crimson a symbol of how much blood the sword had drawn. In his inventory he had many more weapons, though only one was better than the infamous twin katanas which made him feared all across Yggdrasil, for they were able to cut through everything but World Champion Items and World Items.
On his fingers, close enough to draw his weapons even now, glittered three rings providing him access to powerful spells otherwise impossible to access for a player of his class and build. A Greater Teleportation Ring, a Perfect Unknowable Ring and a Wish-Upon-A-Star Ring. Each had three activation slots, after which it could only be "recharged" with in-game currency and it was extremely expensive, so the samurai tried to avoid using them, considering the rings not as trump cards but as "get away before I'm killed" options.
Oni Gusoku was a full pitch-black tatami armour he had carefully forged to make it a perfect Edo period replica. It had incredible resistance to bludgeoning damage, having a passive which reduced such blows by 50% and possessed a single but extremely remarkable skill, that could be activated only if an enemy hit the armour in the last three minutes, and rechargeable only once every 30 minutes. Oni Allegiance would take control of negative and neutral karma NPCs for 30 seconds as long as their health was below 30%, while it would stun all positive karma enemies (players included) in the area for 7 seconds.
As such, the armour had to be paired with his magnificent Kabuto of the Unyielding, a historically accurate helm bearing the Tokugawa Clan crest, three hollyhock leaves inside a circle. It granted him protection from mind control spells up to Super-Tier level, besides defending his head by any weapon up to Legendary Class and most Divine Class items, just like his armour did.
So, what annoyed him was the shitty devs themselves.
The reason why DMMORPG even exist in the first place is so that people can feel nice unlike IRL. How can it be so fucking difficult to make an item that lets people smell some good food and breathe a fresh breeze! Food at home tastes like nothing when it doesn't taste like shit, the air is so polluted I have to breathe through a face mask that's not even cool! Had it at least looked like that evil lord in those old space movies, then I wouldn't complain about it. But here in this world…
Well, actually, right now it's best if I can't breathe the poison here in the Grenbera Swamp, but still, once I'm outside of here, it would be so good to fill my lungs with pure air, but no, the shitty devs couldn't care less about it. Or are they so stupid they can't even figure out how to make it? The hell, if my boss found out I can't do my job properly, I'd be fired immediately! I have to work my ass hard every single day to even afford the "luxury" of playing a game! Ridiculous! Our world is so fucked up that if I had even a tenth the powers I had in Yggdrasyl I'd gladly use it to raze all those shitty corporations to the ground, because of them everything is ruined!
The samurai's left thumbnail tapped on Cutter II, as he was ready to unleash his rage tearing apart a whole section of the swamp.
Better not to, though. This should be their playground, destroying it would make a very bad first impression. I don't want them to think I'm a lunatic! Still, it would be nice if some monster showed up so I could have some fun with it…
At the moment he was confident he could easily take down anything in the Grenbera Swamp after reaching his level and experience. Actually, the samurai was more worried about his favourite helm and armour being damaged rather than himself being hit, but he liked to wear like that on special occasions.
And today is one of those special occasions! Gotta look good, don't wanna blow it!
Even if I seriously doubt they'll actually let me in…
Oh come on man, it's one of them who invited me! don't you start worrying about it. Besides, it is what it is, just a game, nothing more. And I've always been by myself, I needed nobody's help to reach the top. If the others don't want me to join, their loss!
Although it would be nice for once in my lifetime to have some sort of friends…
Enough! Just enjoy the moment! He ordered himself.
To stop overthinking, he looked at his side, glancing at the one who was guiding him with his one good eye. The pupil was as black as burnt fries, surrounded by an iris of the same bright green that formed his short hair, hidden by the kabuto. The bad-eye, his left one, was closed, with a short, straight black scar going from the brow to the cheekbone. Nobody believed he would freely choose to incapacitate himself in such a way and supposed it was just an illusion, probably for a reference about some long lost anime character. After all, his own name derived from a fictional samurai, but no story had actually been written, only two references about him existed, and no official image was found of him, so no player knew what was behind Oshikuru's appearance.
Nobody but him, of course. Just like nobody knew what was behind the illusion of the closed eye. Only the Celestial Lord of the Sixth Heaven had seen it and after that, he died. But World Enemies, once respawned, bore no memory but their own lore.
The goat-faced demon noticed Oshikuru's gaze and guessed what it was about, for Ulbert Alain Odle had cast [Greater Teleportation] bringing the two of them in the marshes a few hundred meters from the Great Catacomb of Nazarick.
"Sorry about the mud, Oshikuru-san, but as I told you I can't bring someone who's still an outsider within the place or any closer than this with teleportation, it's the guild's policy."
"Oh, no problem, Ulbert-san. I'm just disappointed no monster is coming for us. I always yearn for action!"
"Ah, how do I agree with you! Unfortunately, after excessive complaints by some members, the Guildmaster had us vote on it since a few little monsters kept entering our base or standing on its threshold. A solution was quickly found: one of our NPCs was tasked to create an aura which would keep them far from here and it works as a charm."
"Well, makes sense. What's its name?"
"Aura."
"No, I'm asking what's the NPC's name."
"Yeah, I told you. It's Aura!"
"You messin' with me?"
"Ha! as if I'd dare upsetting a World Champion!"
"Don't be like that, you're a World Disaster!"
A hearty laugh resounded across the mist, from which they suddenly emerged.
"So, here it is. The Great Catacomb of Nazarick." Oshikuru stopped in his tracks and glanced around. Actually, he had already seen it by far with his bad eye, but Ulbert didn't need to know about it.
After a while, the World Disaster interrupted his companion's contemplation."If you don't mind me asking, why didn't you make it your own about base? You're always wandering in Helheim…"
"Actually, this is not my "homeworld" even if lately I've been visiting it quite a lot. I never knew it was here until you guys conquered it! With 41 people busy working on it, I'm sure it's spectacular. But my own den isn't that bad. If we become guildmates, you'll be the first one I'll show it to. Besides, I'll need help moving out!"
"Hahaha, don't worry about me helping you out with anything. If you do bring him down, I'll owe you big time!"
"I'll do my part of the deal and defeat him. I've seen all the man's big fights. Touch-san is good, but I'm waaaay better. What I'm worried about is if the majority of the guild members will be willing to accept me. After all, I highly doubt there's more than two or three people like you who will enjoy to see their best fighter being trashed."
Ulbert did a double take. "Why the hell did you accept the deal then?"
Oshikuru grinned. "It's actually pretty simple, I think you can guess it. Your guild's original name was Nine's Own Goal, wasn't it?"
Ulbert scratched his head as if he was IRL. "Hmm, I don't think your own goal is to beat the shit out of Touch-me… though I'd be pretty happy about it, hehe!"
"Definitely not! But he's on my way to be the strongest of the strongest. You know about me beating Zeus, after all it's the reason why you seeked me. But he's not the only World Champion I took care of. As a matter of fact, there are only two more are on my besides Touch Ikve yet to defeat... Of course I have nothing against him, having never met the guy before. I don't care if he's an hypocrite like you said, as far as I'm concerned he's always helped people like us in the game…"
"Yeah, about that, are you sure you're not human? Nobody's ever seen your "dark side" and you still haven't shown it to me…"
"Sorry, Ulbert, but I can't blindly trust you, especially after you told me your reasons. My true identity will be revealed during the fight, if your friend is strong enough to force me into using my full powers. And if not, I'll definitely show you guys later, since you told me the one of the requirements for entering the guild is being a heteromorph."
"Alright, alright I'll wait!" And I can't wait to see that self-righteous sonofabitch being defeated at least one time! I'll record this and put it on YouTube! No, wait, that's too much even for me, they'd kick me out of the guild… I'll just keep it for myself and watch it whenever I feel down!"
"So, is he coming out or…"
"Don't worry, I'll message him and the others right now..."
And the horned demon put two fingers on the left side of his head.
"Hold on a sec. The others?"
"Why, what's wrong? Of course all guild members told me they wanna see this too."
"Hmm, if that's it… just for you to know, if it's a trap, you're gonna regret it. I may be obsessed with being the best, but I never backstabbed anyone in the game and I won't be. If this is a trick, you and your friends will definitely see my dark side! Don't forget I took down a World Enemy all by myself… and back then I wasn't even as strong as I am now, so I'm warning you."
"My friends and I can be a little devious sometimes, I'll admit it. But not this time! You have my word, I swear it on Ainz Ooal Gown itself: my guild and I have no plans against you. This is a PvP duel with only weapons, items and skills allowed, no looting and possibly no PKing, like Touch and you already agreed upon."
"Fine. Let him come, the rest of you can watch. As long as you guys stay up in the sky, you shouldn't be in danger. But be careful! when you take down a tree, you can't complain about the splinters!"
"Oh, I see we have a Dostoevskij's fan over here. Now that I know about it, I'll tell Ra Ra Rasputin, you'll surely have his vote! Actually, if you have anything else to make the others like you…"
"It's no big deal, enough with this. As I told you, my goal is to be the best, not to enter your guild. It'd be nice of course, but I'm pretty sure most of it will hate me once I'm done with Touch-me… Anyway, call'em.
I'm ready!"