Who the Hell Are You? Part 6
I tried for light and fluffy, but my mind is in a dark place today and my muse wrote this. This one is shorter than most of them. Sorry.
Hphphp
Harry Potter was sitting on the swings in the park in Little Whinging, Surry. He was watching a scene he'd seen play out many times before. His cousin was bullying one of the neighbor kids. He thought about interfering but knew from past experience that nothing would come of it. Except for his own beating. He was 10 years old… in body, but in his mind… he was 36.
That's right, Harry Potter was a time traveler. He had come back in time to take care of all those nasty things that should have been taken care of the last time. He was about to leave his house and go back to the magical world. He needed to take care of a few things here in Little Whinging first. He wanted to exact his revenge against the Dursleys.
"I wouldn't bother if I were you," said a voice next to him. The same scene that had played out in many universes many times before.
"Who the hell are you?" squeaked Harry, staring at the dark man who seemed to pop up out of nowhere. He didn't remember having this conversation in his past before. And he certainly didn't remember this man. A man that looked exactly like an older version of himself, only dressed in clothes that he'd never dress in.
"I'm you, from the future," the man stated, looking amused.
"Well, I don't need me from the future to be here. I'm me from the future," Harry said waving him away dismissively. That explained why he didn't remember the man. Too many time travelers could confuse the timeline. He needed to get rid of the guy as soon as possible. Or find out why he was here, there might be a better solution than what he planned.
"Wait, what?" Shadow asked, completely flummoxed.
"That's right, I'm from the future," Harry said, still trying to make the man go away. "I don't need you from the future." Why didn't the man leave? Didn't he see that he was not wanted here?
"You're from the future?" Shadow asked, not having run into this before.
"Yes, I came from the future to take care of the Dursleys and to make sure that Voldemort falls," the young boy stated with sadistic glee. Like he was happy to be there to dish out revenge.
"I came to rescue you," the dark man said, looking completely out of place for once. He felt he was too late this time. This boy was dark already and he felt he might not be able to bring him back to the light side.
"I can rescue myself," the non-child insisted.
"How are you going to do that?" Shadow asked with a sense of foreboding.
"Well, first I'm gonna kill the Dursleys…" the boy said, only to be forestalled with Shadow raising his hand.
"That's gotta be the dumbest thing I've ever heard. First of all, you'll get caught," the dark man said, all but slapping the boy on the back of his head.
"How can that be stupid? I take care of the Dursleys. I disappear into the magic world. They'll never find me," Harry said, as if it were the simplest thing. He had it all planned out. It was reasonable. The muggles would never find him there.
"When Dumbledore finds out that the Dursleys are dead, the first place they're going to look for you is in the magic world, shithead," Shadow stated like it was fact. "You will be the only person who will have known the Dursleys that disappeared."
"Yeah, but they'll never pin it on me," Harry said, waving the accusations away.
"You're gonna be their number one suspect, idiot," Shadow said, wondering what the Dursleys did to this Harry to make him what to kill them in the first place. Sure, they were despicable humans, but they weren't that bad.
"They'll never suspect a 10-year-old person to have murdered the Dursleys," Harry said, dismissively.
"You really are an idiot. What happened to you to make you think that exacting revenge on the Dursleys is the way to go?" Shadow asked, finally putting his thoughts to voice.
"I don't know about where you came from, but these arseholes are the ones who beat the hell out of me almost every day," Harry snarled, glaring at Dudley, who was still picking on the neighborhood children.
"Your reality must have been much worse than mine because they never laid a hand on me," Shadow said, tilting his head in confusion. He did wonder what had changed in the realities. He did wonder if he was indeed rescuing all the Harrys. Or if he was making some of their lives worse by what he was doing. He might have to investigate a bit more before he 'rescues' them.
"Well, they did 'lay hands' on me," Harry said, sulkily. He folded his arms in a very childlike manner.
"Are these the same Dursleys as your Dursleys? Because when you came back in time, did you land in the same reality?" Shadow asked, wanting to know. Because if he didn't, he'd be killing the wrong Dursleys. That would be wrong.
"Now that you mentioned it, I have noticed that these Dursleys haven't laid a hand on me since I've been back," Harry said, rubbing the back of his head with his right hand. He looked a bit sheepish and confused. He'd only been back three days and thought it was just a fluke.
"See, so you can't kill these Dursleys. The bastards that you left behind are not the same ones that you're exacting revenge upon," the dark man said, all but ready to beat the not-kid himself if only to knock some sense into him.
"Well, shite."
"How about I get you out of here and we rescue your godfather, and we get you out of England?" Shadow said, thinking he needed to get the not-kid out of reach of those that might be in danger from him. He didn't want the Dursleys dead because this person might snap one day.
"But what about my revenge? I've got all this knowledge and all these plans that I came back in time to do," Harry said, really wanting to kill something. He had come back to do something to relief that tension. His reality was a bad one and he lived on the edge for so long that he was a razor's edge ready to cut anything that touched him.
"Like what kind of plans?" Shadow asked, hoping for something to work with.
"Well, I want to rescue Hermione and I want to kill Voldemort," Harry said, immediately. Hermione was a given. She was his one true companion in all his life. She had died young, and he wanted to save her from that fate.
"You really are some kind of psychopath, aren't you?" the older man asked, looking at him strangely. He got the saving Hermione part. And he was all for that, but the killing was getting on his nerve.
"What do you mean?" the not-kid asked, tilting his head. He didn't see anything wrong with what he said. It was his destiny after all. Save the girl, kill the bad guy.
"You're just out to kill anybody, aren't you?" Shadow said, seeing the determination in the non-boy's eyes.
"Well, I've had a hard life," came the words from the mouth of the far too young body.
"I suppose so," the older man said, not getting into the fact that he too had a really hard life but didn't go around killing everyone. "What about your godfather? You remember him? Sirius Black."
"I suppose we can get him out of prison, but I really don't remember him very much. What about Dumbledore? Can I kill him?" Harry asked, thinking of all the things that the headmaster had put him through and what he could prevent by just doing the man in right now.
"How many people did you plan on exacting revenge on?" Shadow asked, wondering just what the boy's plans were. Didn't he want to maintain the timeline? If he went around killing everyone then all his knowledge would be moot.
"Let me see… there are the Dursleys, Voldemort, Snape, Dumbledore, Fudge. Let's not forget Umbridge. There are a few other people that I don't remember right off the top of my head. Probably about ten," Harry said, counting them off on his fingers, but with a deep look of concentration on his face.
"And how did you plan on getting away with all this when you're… what? eleven?" Shadow asked, looking at him like he was insane. How did the not-kid hope to get away with all this murder.
"I'm only 10. Thank you very much. But I have the mind of a 36-year-old," the not-kid said, smugly. Like that was an accomplishment. Which in a way it was. There had to have been a great feat of magic to get him here in the first place.
"And you have no wand. You have no money. You have no hopes of pulling all this off," the second time traveler stated, throwing up his hands in the air.
"I was gonna let things play out until I got my wand and my money," Harry said, mulishly. Like it had been his plan all along. He really had been trying to do that too. Then this man came along. Now things were all up in the air. He was seeing that maybe his plans might not be the way to go. Maybe Sirius might be helpful.
"Do you honestly think you could pretend to be an 11-year-old?" Shadow asked, not believing that for a moment.
"I am a very good actor," Harry said, looking everywhere but at the man in front of him.
"Nobody's that good, kid," Shadow stated, looking down his nose at the non-child.
"I just told you I'm not a kid," Harry all but shouted at him. He was getting tired of the man not taking him seriously. He had plans and he was going to do them. He didn't need this bloke's permission or approval.
"And you just made my point," Shadow said, smugly.
"Shite," Harry said, immaturely.
"Is there any way I can convince you to just do things my way?" Shadow asked, hoping he could keep the guy from going on a murder spree. Not that he didn't want to see half those on the other person's list dead, he was trying to keep the other Harry's from turning into Dark Lords. He could see that it might be futile in this case, but he had to try.
"What exactly was your plan when you came here?" Harry asked, tilting his head again. This bloke was an enigma. He came here for a reason, like Harry, and he wanted to know what the reason was. Maybe this bloke's plan was better than Harry's. Maybe.
"To rescue you. Break out your godfather. Get you out of England. See, simple plan," Shadow said, in short succinct sentences.
"But I don't get to kill anybody," the non-child whinged.
"No, no, you don't get to kill anybody," Shadow agreed, hoping to get the not-kid to see it his way.
"But I want people dead," Harry continued to complain.
"We can put people in jail," Shadow tried to compromise.
"I suppose we could do that. Um. Can we start with the Dursleys?" Harry asked, looking at Dudley who was now counting the money he had bullied out of the kids in the neighborhood.
"Have they actually done anything to you since you've been here that warrants them going to jail? Besides Dudley being an arsehole," he asked, looking at the fat kid, who could be rehabilitated.
"Well, no," Harry said, trying to recall anything that the Dursleys had done since he'd been here that would indicate that they were abusive in any way.
"Then no, we can't put them in jail," Shadow said, looking at him like he was simple.
"What about Dudley? Look at him picking on that kid over there," Harry said, seeing Dudley going after a new kid. It seemed Dudley just couldn't help but pick on the kids in the neighborhood.
"Do you see a copper anywhere?" Shadow asked, looking around himself and seeing one walking down the opposite side of the park.
"Yeah, there's one right over there," Harry said, seeing the same one.
"Well, go over there and tell him about it," was the suggestion.
With that, little Harry Potter ran over there and told the bobby about Dudley picking on the little kid. The cop came over and scared the hell out of Dudley. For about five minutes. All was right with Harry's world. For about five minutes. There was no bloodshed, therefore it didn't last long.
"By the way, what the hell can I call you?" Harry finally got around to asking once the bobby left.
"Just call me Shadow. I'm gonna call you Harry. I don't care what you say your name is now. Your name is gonna be Harry," Shadow said, thinking the non-child might want to call himself something weird.
"Why would I go by anything else?" Harry asked, looking at him queerly.
"Forget it," Shadow said, not wanting to get into it.
"So, what are we going to do now?" Harry asked, getting up and walking towards the Dursleys' thinking they were going to confront the family.
"Well, if your relatives are anything like any other universes, they're gonna say you don't own anything in their house. So, we're just going to leave and go to a hotel room and see about getting your godfather out of prison. We can do this legally or we can do it illegally," Shadow said, hoping to do it illegally. That might appease the non-child enough to keep him from killing anyone.
"Oh, let's break him out," the non-child said, in childlike glee.
"If we do that, you guys will have to live on the run for the rest of your life," Shadow warned. He thought they could do it, though they wouldn't have to. He knew Sirius could get asylum in America or Australia. They wouldn't live on the run for long. Harry didn't need to know that though.
"I can do that," Harry said, like it would be an adventure.
"You are one weird bloke," Shadow said, shaking his head at the strange non-child.
"But I've always wanted to make a prison break," Harry said, rubbing his hands together. He was making plans on how to do it as they walked down the walkway.
"Fine, we'll do it your way. And then we'll see what Sirius wants to do once we get him out," the second time traveler said, wondering why he was still hanging around. This Harry didn't need his help. He was a grown man who was in a child's body. He could do what he wanted, and Shadow could walk away without guilt.
With that, the two of them proceeded to London proper. Got a muggle hotel room and made plans to break Sirius out of Azkaban. It was not an easy thing to do since Harry was in a 10-year-old body and they only had the one invisibility cloak. Harry insisted that he had to come along, which means they'd have to share the cloak.
In the end they had to take the ferry, during a routine run, to the island, under the cloak. Creep through the prison, under the cloak. Convince Padfoot to squeeze through the bars, still under the cloak. Sneak through the prison again, with all three of them under the cloak. And take the ferry back, still under the cloak. It was all very anticlimactic. Though they did do it in the middle of the night.
They didn't meet any resistance with the Dementors because they couldn't see them under the cloak. The cloak hides from everything, including death. The only reason Dumbledore and Moody could ever see it was because there was a thread woven into the cloak that Dumbledore had put there, that had a tracking charm on it. Shadow had founded it ages ago and removed it.
It took three showers to stop Sirius from stinking. Azkaban had done him no favors. It was like the place had no indoor plumbing, which it didn't. They just threw a bucket of water on the prisoners once a month to clean them off. It was inhumane.
"Great," said Sirius once he was finally clean. "So, who the hell are you?" he asked Shadow. "And what are you doing with Harry? Not that I'm not glad you got me out, but…"
"My name is Shadow. You know, Harry. We broke you out of prison. He wants to kill people. I want to get you out of England," Shadow said, in short sentences. He wanted to get it out there now, so the man wasn't caught unawares.
"Wait, what? Harry wants to kill people?" Sirius asked, looking at his non-child godson. Not that he knew that, but he saw the glint in the boy's eyes and knew the man spoke the truth.
"Yes, we're both from the future, but we're both from different realities. He came back in time. His mind is 36 years old in the body of a 10-year-old. He is in the body of your godson. It's just that his 36-year-old mind has taken over that body," Shadow explained the best he could, while Harry looked on. "I'm from a different reality completely. I brought my body back in time. We decided to get you out of prison so you can decide what he's going to do."
"So, what happened to my godson? Where is he?" Sirius asked, a bit confused as to what was happening. He looked at Harry and squinted his eyes as if to see if his 10-year-old godson was still in there.
"He's still there. He's just now incorporated with the 36-year-old," Harry said, looking at him funny. Like it wasn't that hard of a concept to understand.
"You killed my godson?" Sirius asked, turning on the 10-year-old non-child in anger. To him it was murder. Harry never got a chance to grow up. This person took that from him and took over his life.
"No, he said it was okay. He wanted to be shot at the Dursleys and I gave him away out," the first time traveler stated, holding up his hands in supplication.
"You arsehole. You unmitigated bastard. A 10-year-old is not old enough to make that kind of decision," Sirius shouted, looking like his world was just yanked from him. Like his whole reason for living was taken from him.
"We talked about it for a long time, Sirius. It wasn't like I just sat there and said 'Oh. by the way, I'm gonna take over your body'," Harry said, sarcastically. He didn't see what the problem was. He had had a long chat with Harry the younger. Had told him about what the world was like, where he came from, what his plans were. Harry agreed to his plans. He agreed to let him take over his body.
"I don't know what I'm gonna do," said Sirius, falling to his knees. He put his hands to his face and cried for a moment. "You are not my godson. You are some 36-year-old stranger in my godson's body."
Shadow came up to the man and put a hand on his shoulder. Sirius shook it off and stood. He stormed to the other side of the room and glared at the two of them like they had stolen everything from him.
"Come on, Sirius. It's still me. I'm still Harry," the non-child said, hurt in his tone, though he still didn't understand what the problem was.
"No, you're really not," Sirius said, shaking his head in denial.
"Well, shite," said Shadow. This was not going the way he had hoped it would. Sirius would not be helping Harry stick to the light path. Harry might just turn into a Dark Lord over this. There wasn't anything he could do about it.
"I'm out of here," said Sirius. He turned and opened the door and left.
"Well, there went our only hope to get you a guardian," said Shadow, watching the empty space that was the doorway.
"You're the one who had to tell him I'm from the future," Harry said, in an accusing tone.
"Well, I wasn't going to lie to the man," the other man stated, in an affronted manner. He knew it would have come out eventually and that would have been much worse.
"Well, now what are we going to do?" the non-child asked, throwing up his hands.
"Well, we could get you an aging potion," Shadow suggested. Thinking maybe it was time for him to try his luck in the next world.
"I suppose that'll work," Harry said, thinking that he could get around better if he was older looking, but that didn't mesh with his plans. He needed to get into Hogwarts. That's where most of the people he needed to kill were going to be.
"You just have to promise not to kill people," Shadow said, trying one more time to get the boy to commit to following the righteous path.
"I can't make that promise. I still have to take care of the Voldemort problem," Harry said, looking everywhere but at Shadow.
"I'm just gonna leave England into your hands. I'm gonna go rescue the next Harry. Hopefully this next one won't be a time travelling idiot," Shadow said, going out the same door in much the same way that Sirius did. Leaving Harry to do what he will with the plans he had made.
"Yeah, back at you, arsehole," Harry said to the empty space.
Hphphp
Harry went to Hogwarts and did pull off being a kid rather well. He was immature enough that most people bought it. He rescued Hermione and saved many muggleborn. He also got to kill a lot of people. Including Fudge, Umbridge, Dumbledore, Snape and a few others. He got caught and was labeled a Dark Lord. He escaped and ruled Britain for many years.
Then Voldemort came back and the two of them fought over the country for years. Muggleborn against pureblood. In the end the muggleborn won and Harry ruled. Still a Dark Lord, but a lesser one than Voldemort.