There were very few people Jade was able to tolerate in the last few weeks of pregnancy. The discomfort peaked around 40 weeks and her ordinarily short fuse was getting shorter and shorter.

Predictably, her due date came and went, which she blamed Beck for entirely. Her ex-boyfriend had never been on time for anything in his life so she didn't know why she expected his offspring to be any different.

Being pregnant had been a weird experience. She felt completely unlike herself and she missed her pre-pregnancy body. But as much as she was looking forward to getting her figure back, she knew the next step was actually having the baby and that thought terrified her more than pregnancy ever did.

She kept finding herself standing in the second bedroom, staring at the empty crib in disbelief. She still didn't feel the connection everyone promised her she'd feel. She still didn't feel like a mom. She still didn't love the baby. It scared the shit out of her and the fear was coming out in the form of being an absolute bitch to anyone who came near her.

She was exactly five days past her due date and just waiting for the inevitable moment her waters decided to break. Tori and Cat had invited themselves over that evening and both of them were getting on her last nerve.

"Have you packed your hospital bag yet?" Tori asked her for what felt like the millionth time. Jade nodded, ignoring what to her felt like a dumb question.

"Oooh have you picked an outfit for fetching the baby home?" Cat picked up where Tori left off. "Is it the adorable green romper? I still can't believe you won't tell us if it's a boy or a girl yet."

"Jesus Christ. Does it matter?" Jade snapped. The baby squirmed inside of her, squeezing several of her organs and instigating a sharp contraction in the process.

"Of course not! I'm just so excited for them to get here!" Cat squealed.

Jade grimaced, rubbing her belly in discomfort. Tori watched her in pity.

"Have you tried doing anything to speed things up?" She asked sympathetically.

"Not really." Jade breathed through the pain.

"Let's google it," Tori suggested, putting her glasses on and typing quickly into her phone. Jade watched while Tori scrolled through the search results.

"Okay, so there are some things you could do. Nothing is 100%, but you could try drinking pineapple juice-"

"Absolutely not," she wrinkled her nose in disgust.

"Jogging up and down the stairs-"

"I live in an apartment,' she pointed out.

"Having sex-" Tori continued.

"Who exactly is going to have sex with me like this?" Jade gestured towards her body dramatically.

"You could ask Beck?" Cat shrugged. Jade snorted loudly.

"It's not that wild a suggestion," Tori pointed out. "It's proven to be the most successful method for naturally inducing labor."

"Sure, let me just call him," Jade feigned enthusiasm. "Oh, hi Beck, how's things?Remember that time we broke up like nine months ago? Please come over and screw me."

Cat gasped. "I didn't need that image in my head," she covered her eyes behind her hands.

"You were the one who suggested it," Jade rolled her eyes.

Cat and Tori continued enthusiastically discussing whether or not she should order an extra spicy burrito for lunch the next day and meanwhile, Jade zoned out. She needed a break from the topic of childbirth altogether. But the alternative direction her mind drifted wasn't much better.

She still hadn't spoken to her dad since she sent him that email. This wasn't exactly unusual. They regularly went several months without interacting with each other. But she honestly thought he would have reached out by now. She took note how little he actually seemed to care about her or his unborn grandchild.

Her mom, on the other hand, had become insufferable. She was calling her on a daily basis and wanted details of every single hospital appointment she had. Jade didn't like it. She also couldn't resist reminding her at least once per phonecall that she had thrown away her twenties and better hope Beck took her back, as no one would ever want to date her again once she was a single-mom. Jade was praying for the next big case at work to inevitably divert her attention away again.

"Have you had thirty minutes exercise today? Physical activity pushes the baby down on your cervix so increases your chance of going into labor," Tori informed her in a doctoresque tone.

Jade took a grounding breath. She was one more invasive question about her cervix away from losing her shit when she heard the sound of keys turning in the front door. A few seconds later, Beck stepped into the living room, having already helped himself to an apple from the fruit bowl in the kitchen.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't expect you to have anyone over," Beck looked equally as surprised to see Cat and Tori sitting there as they were to see him.

Jade didn't think she'd ever been more grateful for her ex-boyfriend showing up unannounced.

"Because I couldn't possibly have any other visitors than you?" Jade raised an eyebrow in his direction.

"No," Beck overlooked her sour attitude, biting into his apple. "Because you told me, you weren't speaking to another human being until after you gave birth. And as far as I can tell, you're still pregnant." Jade glared at him.

"You know that thing on the front door? It's called a doorbell. You could maybe try using it since you don't live here anymore."

"Mm, these apples are delicious, by the way. Where did you buy them?" Beck ignored her, taking a seat beside her on the couch.

"I'm going to change the locks," Jade informed him.

Beck grinned, putting his arm around her shoulders. "You'd miss me too much," Jade scoffed.

"I don't think I would actually."

"So," Tori interrupted the two of them from bickering. "We were just talking about ways to make the baby come sooner."

"Oh yeah?" Beck replied.

"Yeah, Jade doesn't think you'd be down for the most effective method though."

"Vega," Jade growled, her eyes flaring warningly.

"If it gets things going, I'm down for anything," Beck replied obliviously. Tori and Cat shared a look.

"I bet you are," Cat giggled.

Beck opened his mouth to respond but before he had the chance, Jade grabbed his arm and squeezed it.

"Beck," she said sternly. "Stop talking."

"Cat, I just remembered!" Tori put on her best-worst acting. "We have that thing tonight?"

"What thing?" Cat took a second to click on. "Oh yeah, the thing!" Jade glared at them both.

"Yeah, we should really get going," Tori stood up, grabbing her purse from the coffee table. "You two, have fun..."

"Shut the fuck up," Jade replied exasperatedly.

"Byeee!" Cat followed Tori out of the apartment, both of them suppressing fits of laughter. Jade avoided making any eye contact with her ex-boyfriend until they were good and gone.

"What did I just miss?" Beck asked in confusion.

"Nothing," Jade rolled her eyes. "Just those two being their usual exhausting selves."

Beck took the hint and dropped the topic, placing his palm on her belly and rubbing it. She closed her eyes and leant against his torso.

She knew this was far too intimate for exes and broke several friendship codes but she was so unbelievably uncomfortable and he knew her body better than anyone else.

She could feel his gaze on her. His gentle touch providing the only real comfort she'd felt that day. It hit her how much she missed him. Even right now. She didn't know how it was possible for someone to be so close and feel so far away at the same time.

She wasn't a complete idiot. She saw the way he looked at her, when he thought she wasn't looking. He was affectionate and sentimental and she could tell he still had feelings for her.

But she still didn't trust him with her heart. She still didn't know how to love him the way he wanted her to. And right now, she needed to focus all her energy on figuring out how to love their child. If she even had it in her.

She grimaced.

"I feel like shit," she admitted out loud. It was the truth, although she wasn't sure if she meant it in the physical or emotional sense.

"Just try and relax," Beck replied soothingly. "You need to rest before you actually do go into labor. I'm just gonna sort this place out a bit."

Jade groaned, removing her head from his chest to let him out. He started tidying the living room, organising the clutter on the coffee table and returning used mugs to the kitchen. His incessant need to tidy was a quirk of his that she had long grown used to. She knew he did it from a place of care, but today it was just getting on her nerves.

"Do you have to do that?" She complained when he started with the vacuum.

"It's messy," Beck pointed out.

"It's fine," she insisted, irrationally irritated by every move he made. "I can sweep my own floors."

"Listen," he returned to the couch a few minutes later. He had one hand in his jacket pocket and a nervous look on his face. She frowned, watching him suspiciously.

"What are you doing?"

"I was going to wait until after the baby was born to give you this, but I feel like the moment is right to give it to you now," Beck started what she could tell was a well rehearsed speech.

"Please don't tell me this is fucking push present?" She held her head in her hands.

Beck paused. "I mean, not exactly."

Jade shook her head, her cheeks flaring with unprecedented anger.

"I do not want anything from you. No presents, no gifts. So whatever that is, do not give it to me!" she told him harshly.

"Seriously?" Beck asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Seriously," she repeated in a firm tone.

Jade watched him stuff the gift back in his jacket pocket. The expression on his face was somewhere between exacerbation and hurt. She knew she'd probably overreacted, but the last thing she needed right now was any type of grand gesture from him to make her feel even more guilty than she already did.

"I think I'm just going to go to bed," she exhaled, rubbing her temple. "I have a headache."

"Alright," Beck replied, clearly still upset with her. "I'll just leave then."

"Yeah bye," she rolled her eyes, not in the mood to start a full blown argument with him.

Beck didn't stay for long after that and let himself out without any further conversation. The moment the front door closed behind him, her anger dissipated into sadness.

She had no doubt Beck would be an amazing dad. He already loved the baby so much and had all the natural instincts that she herself lacked. And he had been nothing but lovely to her throughout her entire pregnancy. He was a ray of sunshine and she did everything she could to bring him down. She couldn't help herself. And this was exactly why they were better off as friends.

She didn't deserve him.