Disclaimer: Bonesboy15 doesn't own Helluva Boss or Naruto. The following is a written work of fan-fiction. It contains adult language and situations. Reader discretion is advised.
One Knuckleheaded Glutton
Break Fast
"Yeah, alright, dude. Take care, Marty–watch that step!" Naruto warned as he escorted the last of the party goers out of the manor. The tipsy-slash-hungover Hellhound did not watch the step and proceeded to tumble the rest of the way down the slight hill that exit led to. The observing Foxfiend winced and quickly checked the surroundings before he shrugged and shut the door. Once that was done, he turned around and slumped against it. "Thank fuck that that's over with."
"Are the parasites gone?!" Bee called from somewhere nearby. She'd disappeared about an hour before the party wrapped up so she could check on her 'production'. A text fifteen minutes after had Naruto spamming clones to get the party goers as fucking far away from the manor as he could, before searching for any sleeping drunks that might try to take advantage of the situation.
Oh, did the last bit sound a bit strange? Well, while those who didn't know her but knew of her reputation may think Bee-lzebub would just leave the attendees to rot where they fell, so they could party again when they woke up, they were horribly wrong. She'd made those mistakes after parties over millennia ago, and found out real quick that most demons that crashed at her parties were basically scumbags and lightweights. Some attempted to shmooze up to Bee, and a lesser few attempted the same to Naruto once he hit the scene, while others bitched or moaned about needing cash or favors to get to their jobs or home. A favor here or there, if Bee was feeling generous was one thing, but giving rides and cash out to everyone that crashed mid-party was a quick way to get the fuckers Greed to ruin her good time.
That was one of the first lessons Naruto had to learn when he first started staying with Bee, which was an ass amount of time ago.
"Yes, Bee! There's no one left in the manor!" Naruto called back with a roll of his eyes. He pushed himself off of the door and rubbed the tired organs before he checked the clock. "Huh, two-fifty. New record short."
As he made his way to the pantry to get a post-party snack thrown together, he stretched his arms above his head and yawned. Shi-i-i-it, why did I agree to help her set up a back-to-back party? Those are always more fucking exhausting than the first. I should just make clones now and sleep that off after—
"Baby Bro, eat this!"
So surprised by the sudden reappearance of Bee, Naruto couldn't help but gag on the utensil that was shoved into his mouth. Three of Bee's four hands steadied him while the offending (if unintentional) gagging hand whirled around the obstructing utensil in his mouth, spreading whatever was on it to every nook and cranny. Sweet, sticky, tangy, and a bit salty. It wasn't terrible, but the whole not-being-able-to-breathe thing was clouding his judgment.
Naruto pulled himself free of the Sin's grasp and braced against the nearby island. He forced down whatever the mass of goopy treat was and then doubled over to cough and gasp. Ah, the cool relief of life was, but brief before it was overwhelmed by a hot fire.
"God dammit, Bee! We've–" he coughed again as he straightened up. He glared at the sweetly smiling creature he considered kin and pointed a claw at her once he got his coughing fit in check. "We've talked about this, dammit! Stop fucking doing that!"
"Oh, grow a set, bitch. You lived, didn't you?"
"I li–?! That's not the fucking point! You can't just shove shit into people's mouths!" He growled at her. He held a finger up when she opened her mouth to argue. "This ain't Lust and we aren't fucking! My point stands!"
"Tch, fine. I'm sorry, or whatever–So, what'd you think?! Good shit, right?" Bee asked with a big smile and wide red eyes, all but dismissing his near death experience at her hands.
Naruto let out another soft cough as he glanced over her posture. Two of her hands tightly interlocked in front of her, while one of the other two wrung around the other which held the oversized, plastic spork that she'd choked him with—Ugh, was that thing freaking green? He almost died to a green spork? Fucking seriously? Weak.
"Gimme a second, alright? I had other things on my mind."
"You gotta stop thinking about that bitch that turned you down, Baby Bro."
"I wasn't thinking about—I needed air! Gimme a second, god-damn!" Naruto growled into his hand and ran his tongue over some of the residual goop that was in-between his teeth. He used a claw to pick out another chunk and sniffed it before he slurped it down. "It's a bit slimy, and yet...strangely satisfying."
"So…good?" Bee pressed, her wings beating up as she leaned in, her smile growing.
"Well, of the past ten flavors you've tried to kill me with, I'd put it at a solid… four; up at the top, but not top three material." Naruto evaluated as his tongue cleaned over the rest of his gums. This taste was going to be popping up for the next few days. Ah, well, he was just happy it wasn't going to be as bad as the Nut Butter Incident.
"So, more time in the pot? Less? Too much flavor, does it need more? C'mon, Baby Bro, help your Big Sis out, here. What's it missing?" Bee asked, hovering around him and darting from one side to the next. He closed his eyes to think and avoid getting dizzy from her erratic movements.
"Maybe…a companion snack? Tastes like it could be a dip."
"Ooh, new snack dip! Great idea, Baby Bro." Bee sent the offensive green spork away and pulled a small notebook out to scrawl in. Where did the notebook and pen come from? Naruto didn't know. He wasn't great with magic, the simple sleight of hand variant or otherwise, and hearing about the theory behind either always made him smell copper.
"Glad to help, Bee." Naruto sighed, a small smile stretched across his face as she muttered about possible combinations. It was at the point where she started weighing the pros and cons of dipping a Meatlover's Pizza into the new flavor that he decided to back out. "Alright, the party is over. I lived through another ambush taste test. I'm gonna make some ramen and then take a nap."
"Nap? What?! C'mon, don't be a stick in the mud, Bro. It's only..." Bee glanced at the clock and then snapped back to grin at him. "Three-fifteen!"
"In the morning."
"Your point?"
Naruto stared at her with half-lidded eyes. He took a deep breath and put a hand to his temples. A slow breath slid out of his mouth before he looked at the Sin of Gluttony once more.
"Bee? Do you remember what our agreement was?"
"That you live with me basically rent free and help me out whenever I ask?" Bee smiled back sweetly, a glint of something in her eyes. He held the gaze with one of his own for all of a second before he groaned.
"Yeah, fuck, fine. I walked into that one...No, Bee. My day. To-day. I want to train." Naruto crossed his arms. "And since you don't like letting me go all out–"
"Whoa! Hey, don't make me out to be the bad guy!" Bee snapped back, a set of hands on her hips while one balled up at the side, and the other pointed back at him. She hovered in his face and jabbed his chest. "What you do when you get in that zone is not training! It's borderline self-harm! It is not okay! Not to mention, it leaves a rancid fucking stank in my gym!"
"Oh, fuck off! I have to clean it up, anyway!"
"Your clones will, you mean."
"Fucking semantics–!" Naruto threw his hand up with a frustrated snarl. It was too early to argue about this. "I'm trying to get it under control, Bee! But if you won't honor our arrangement–!"
"Our arrangement keeps Luci from sending you to Mammon's fighting pits to take care of that shit! And he only agreed to that because he saw that you were like me!" Bee's eyes started to glow and more of Queen Bee-lzebub started to emerge from the party-loving face. "Past all that shit that Fuckwad left inside you, he could tell that your Sin matched mine! You belong here with me, Naru-lzebub!"
"With you, sure! Not to you!" Naruto shot back with a snarl. He faintly registered the sound of his shirt tearing, but his focus was on the Sin. Even with the skewed perception his own hearing caused, he could tell his voice deepened. The ground cracked under his digitigrade feet and a darker arm pointed at the growling Sin. "You don't fucking own me, Bee-lzebub! I humor your fucking parties, but in case you've forgotten, Dear Sister, I have my own fucking life to live!"
"You won't if you keep trying to kill yourself trying to use that-that shit, you brain-dead dumbass!" Bee-lzebub flew into his face and nearly pierced his snout with her claw. He bared his teeth and snarled as she kept shouting back. "In case you've forgotten, you ungrateful little dipshit, you do belong to me! The Ring of Gluttony, and every-fucking-thing in it, belongs to me! Guess what, Bro, that includes you!"
The island he once used to steady himself was crushed under his claws and their argument devolved into roars.
Vortex liked to consider himself a calm and collected individual. He'd had a series of life experience under his belt before he advanced to the status he was at. Some of the shit he'd seen would be enough to make the most experienced soldiers cry. Fuck, that wasn't even including the loss of his eye. That shitty 'adventure' happened just before his sweet baby Bee flew into his life, turned it upside down and then right side up. He owed the Sin, and to some extent her lazy fuck of a brother, more than he could ever repay her.
So, whenever his Hellphone screamed with her assigned shriek, he tended to put it as priority. Thankfully, Verosika was not only used to this take, but after the breakup with her last boyfriend-slash-bodyguard, she approved of the action. It didn't hurt that the pop star and Sin of Gluttony were friends.
"Better get that, Tex! Who knows, maybe Bee wizened up and decided to dump your ass." Verosika teased as she and her crew took a break from the move prep to soundboard. Josh and Coco jeered while the rest of the crew snickered.
"Ha-ha, fuck you, Vee." Vortex shook his head, smirking as he pulled his phone out and ignored the mock 'orgy' sounds that the crew tried to bomb his call with. The picture was a selfie of Bee curled into his chest post coitus. Vortex didn't remember when it happened, just that it was early on. He unlocked the phone and held it up to his ear. "What's up, babe?"
The response from the other side of the call was not coherent. Which, frankly, wasn't usual, but also wasn't frequent enough for him to brush it off. Snarls and roars were combined with the sounds of what he could only guess to be collateral damage. Immediately, Vortex went into work mode. He had to keep his head on, and that meant keeping calm. Even if he was worried, he knew that Bee could handle herself. She was the fucking Sin of Gluttony, after all.
"Babe? Bee? I need a sit-rep." A particularly loud pair of shrieks caused Vortex to drop his phone and cup his hands over his ears. "Fuck!"
All he had in his head were his own thoughts and a constant high-pitched ringing. Oh, fucking terrific, his hearing was shot. A hand carefully pressed on his shoulder and he whipped around with a snarl. Verosika stared at him, eyes worried, and he tried to follow her lips as she asked him something.
Damn, being half-blind and deaf was not doing him any favors.
"Can't hear." Vortex kept his voice even as best he could and closed his eyes. The migraine that was going to come after this was going to be murderous. "Should clear up in a bit. Bee's in a fight. Sounds serious. Might be another Sin. Best course of action is to stay put. Can someone hang up my phone?"
A reassuring pat followed before he was guided to sit. Thank fuck he could still use his sense of smell. Sharp cherry-vanilla perfume, Kiki. His good eye cracked open and the succubus in question was smiling at him in relief. She rubbed his arm and made a few gestures with her fingers.
Right, her sister was born deaf. He appreciated the consideration.
"Nah, I'm good, Ki. Everyone needs to sit tight. I can't do shit right now." Vortex sighed. He could keep track of the crew so long as they stayed put, since without his hearing and already being down an eye put him in a huge disadvantage. Thankfully, this was just an accident and they weren't being targeted by fans.
Something jabbed into his chest and he looked up to see Verosika holding his Hellphone out. The call had ended, and he could still use it for simple tasks if need be. Verosika pulled her own device out and tapped at the screen a few times. A message went through and once his phone vibrated, he read it.
"Yeah, I'm sure. Our best move is to sit tight. Just let me know if a Ring goes on lockdown." Vortex grimaced and brushed at his left ear when the ringing suddenly went intense. It died down after a second. "If she is fighting another Sin, that'll seal it. Just-just go back to brainstorming, guys. I'm going to call a few extra hands to secure the premises–My treat, Vee."
Verosika, who's credit had gone to shit just before she went to rehab, smiled gratefully and leaned in–Oh, fuck. Not this again. He held a hand up and growled.
"Before this happens, because I know I can't stop you, a warning. If any of you sick fuckers try to do anything more than scratch..." He warned. The musical crew of Succubi and Incubi gained stars in their eyes as he resigned himself to being the crew's emotional support animal. It wasn't the first time this happened and it likely wouldn't be the last.
As Verosika and Kiki started to scratch his ears, Vortex used what remained of his faltering coherency to send his girlfriend a message asking her to get in touch when the fight was over. Hopefully, Bee would get back to him soon and he could enjoy his friend and boss's show of affection without looking too stupid.
With an irate snarl, a solitary pillar fell over just before the dust fully settled in what used to be the foyer of Bee-lzebub's manor. Its crash was followed by a roar of pain, before a tense quiet filled the room. Two canid-like demons were across from each other, one heaved heavy breaths as she got to her feet while the other teetered on the edge of consciousness and tried to pull himself out from under the pillar that fell on him without the use of his arms.
Bee winced and glanced down at the dislocated right arm on her side, part of it was missing a good chunk in the tricep after the other demon got a good bite out of her. She grabbed the arm and grit her teeth before she forced it back into place. Then, a quick swell of power healed the chunk that was missing. She sighed and glared at the pinned demon.
"You done?" Bee asked, her eyes still red. A cautious step brought her closer, and a weak growl kept her at bay. Bee felt her shoulders slump. "Fuck–Can we stop wrecking my house now? Please?"
Naruto snarled and his emissive white eyes narrowed before his struggles to escape his confinement renewed. The spiral-like markings that sprouted upon his ascension started to glow. She was quick to dish out another smack to the snout and fall back, the strike was sure to break his concentration, but she couldn't be in range for any retaliation. The glowing stopped and the massive Foxfiend collapsed back under the pillar with a whine.
"Don't give me that shit, Baby Bro! You started this!" Bee hissed. She closed her eyes and growled before she threw her arms, sans the freshly reset one, up. "Seriously, what the fuck, dude?! This is what the fuck I'm talking about! You don't–You can't train with that shit! It's killing you!"
"D-Did...it...once..." The deep rumble of his true demonic form was faltering. Great. Bee won. If only she wasn't sore and her house wasn't a fucking wreck in the making. This is why she preferred partying to fights; at least a party only had furniture damage and most of the structural stuff was superficial. When she had to fight, repairs tended to get expensive, if not turned into full on renovation projects. And that was with her trying not to get serious.
She liked her house, thank you very much!
"Yeah, and you fucking died then!" Bee argued. With another growl she resumed her approach and dropped down to sit beside the little idiot. He curled his lip and she flicked the edge of his nose. "Fuck off with that tough guy crap. Fight's over. I won."
Naruto growled once more before he looked away from her. Bee sighed and used her top right hand to clear some of the dried blood out of her adjacent eye. The left reached out and pressed into his shoulder. He turned to snarl at her again, but her other left hand caught his muzzle with ease.
"I'm helping you revert, you little shit. Just relax, okay?"
He snorted but let his eyes close and she guided him in putting his monstrous demonic reserves in check. His fur lightened from the darker hue it gained and he started to shrink down. By the time it was done, the pillar's cracked structure gave and parted to either side of him. Bee let out another huff and looked down at the ungrateful brat she took in.
Half-lidded blue eyes glared at the wall across from him, his limp and broken arms rested at his side. One leg looked slightly malformed – she'd have to get some of her 'Royal Honey' out to fix that – and the fur on his tail started to grow back. Bee sighed and pulled at the remnants of the shirt that remained.
"Well, there's another priceless piece of Verosika memorabilia that you've destroyed. Do you have a less famous artist you want to promote in your spare time? I'll bet their merch is cheaper."
"Fuck...off."
"Oh, for the love of–" Bee scowled and swatted the younger demon on the top of his nose.
"Ow, shit!"
"Grow the fuck up!" Bee glared at him. He scowled back for a second before she flared her power. "I will put you in the fucking ICU, Bro! Don't test me!"
"Way to show you care."
"Believe it or not, I like having you around, Naru." Bee huffed. She adjusted herself and then pulled his head into her lap. Her claws stroked through blood-stained fur, gently parting the clumps, and tweaked a spot by the base of his ear. "You can be a loudmouthed, arrogant, stubborn little shithead sometimes–"
"I feel the love."
"But," Bee ignored his grumbled interjection, "You put up with my shit. You help me stay on course, you don't let me go too party-crazy; and I'm super grateful for that. Trust me, if you think I'm bad, I can get fucking worse."
"The nightmare." Naruto snorted. His eyes drifted shut and a soft rumble started when her left hand reached under to catch his sweet spot at the base of his jaw. Bee grinned as he tried to fight back the purr that stuttered about in his chest. "Not...cool."
"Deal." Bee snorted. She enjoyed scratching her adorable 'baby brother' and waited until she felt the first twitch of his floofy tail. Sure enough, another second of resistance passed before he succumbed to her affectionate scratches. Bee closed her eyes and went over the events of the night after the party ended, the argument that led to this. Another sigh parted her lips and she stopped abusing his body's weakness to let him regain some semblance of clarity.
"...Why'd ja stop?"
"Look." Bee twisted and cradled the Foxfiend's head in her good set of hands so they could look eye-to-eye. "I get it. No, I do get it, Baby Bro. You've got an unhealthy fixation, rooted in something connected to our Sin. But the training, and this...that shit? It's not good. And yeah, ha-ha, we're in Hell, but seriously. When I say every resident in the Ring of Gluttony belongs to me, I mean that in the sense that I don't like it when other people go breaking my shit. People or possessions, same diff."
He growled at her and his eyes flashed white. Bee rolled her eyes.
"You don't like it, I know. I get that, too. I wasn't always Queen Bee, Baby Bro, I know what its like to be a possession. To an extent, I still am. Just… with more freedom and responsibility and shit." She leveled him with a look. "Part of that is making sure you don't fuck up and get on Luci's bad side."
"Yeah." He huffed, a flake spittle of nearly dried blood landed on the ground. "'Cause I'm so scared of that little clown."
"Naru-lezbub, do not take Lucifer lightly. He was the first to rise up and the first to be cast down." Bee warned. He grumbled his doubts, stubborn little bastard. Resigned to let him keep his low opinion of Morningstar, for now, she patted him on the cheek. "I'm skipping tracks, the point is; You belong to me. It's the truth, and it sucks," she paused and shrugged. "Well, for you, I guess it does–But! But! It could always be a whole lot fucking worse."
"Oh, yeah? How?" His gaze narrowed and she arched a brow. Oh, he wanted her to prove it?
"Well, for starters, you could be Ozzie's personal pet bitch. Ridden and fucked on every night of the days that end in 'Y'." Bee deadpanned. Naruto opened his mouth, closed it, and then let out a resigned sigh as his ears went flat. Bee smirked and scratched his jawline to get the purrs going again. "Yeah, I figured you'd prefer this arrangement."
Her sweet, stupid, little baby brother couldn't argue that. Maybe it was because it was a good point that he couldn't refute, or, more likely, it was because she'd all but shut down his higher brain functions by targeting his sweet spot. Regardless, the fight was over, Bee won! All that came next would be rebuilding her place and then punishing the foolish little Foxfiend in her lap.
Perhaps Tex was onto something. Maybe it was time he got an actual job outside of being her first choice in labor. Out of the Ring. Unsupervised, without a guarantee he'd not stir shit up between Sins.
Eh, she'd have to think about it.
"Alright, come on, Baby Bro." Bee pulled him up off of the ground and carried his more or less limp body in her arms. She glanced at the cut across his spine. "Mm, probably severed. Guess we might as well go watch some of Luci's shitty early morning tv cartoons while you heal."
"Oh, fuck me raw with an iron rod. Can't you just kill me instead?"
"And let you take the easy way out? No, I think not." Bee smirked as he whined. She glanced around and spotted her phone amongst some of the rubble. She snatched it up with one of her spare hands and hummed at the sight of a fresh text. Whoops, she accidentally fight-dialed Tex. She'll just get back to him once she gets her troublesome baby brother all set up. Which she did by dumping him none-too-gently on the mostly untouched couch.
"There you go, Baby Bro. Don't go anywhere."
"You're so fucking funny, I forgot how to laugh." The snark from the temporarily paralyzed Foxfiend caused Bee to laugh. She clicked on the television just as taller than average Imp slid out onto the screen.
"Hey all you fuckwads out there with an axe to grind and a wallet of cash to spend; My name is Blitzø, the 'O' is silent, and I have a deal for you!"
As Bee read over the message from her boyfriend, and a few others she'd missed during the fight, she occasionally glanced up at the commercial. A small smirk crossed her face. Good on this Imp for challenging the bullshit status quo. He probably couldn't hold a job down, so he made his own, and got the backing from some noble, if that inferred portal was anything to go by. The idea of an afterlife revenge hit-squad was certainly a unique one.
I.M.P., huh? I wonder if they're hiring. Bee thought as she sent Vortex an 'all clear'. She glanced at her Baby Bro's back and then made her way to her Honey-Chambers, they should be relatively unharmed by the fight. At least, they better be.
A fire ravaged a small building in the heart of Imp City. Normally, this was nothing new to befall the mongrel denizens of Hell's top circle. If one considered where the namesake's kind stood in Hell's hierarchy, it was frankly one of the lesser forms of devastation that could strike the city. Alas, this building in particular is a crucial location for one I.M.P., as it was the same building that housed their place of business.
"Well, there goes that office. I'm surprised it lasted more than a week." Loona snorted. She pulled her Hellphone out and started searching Sinstagram for any office floor openings nearby before word of the fire spread and prices skyrocketed to even higher and more ridiculous numbers. The three idiots beside her should be so grateful she was so practically minded. Her left ear perked up when The Fatty started talking.
"When did we implement that policy, sir?"
"When you set fire to my office in front of a client, you FUCKING DIPSHIT!" Blitzø shouted as he jostled Moxxie by the collar. Loona looked up from her property hunt and smirked at the little shidiot getting his just desserts. After a hot second of assault, her adoptive parent tossed their co-worker down and covered his face. He took in a deep breath and then interlaced his hands in front of him. "Okay! Okay. It's fine! I'm good. It's...o-kay. We have a job. We can fix this. We can avenge Slippery, Sparkery, and Fuckboi! But to do that, first, I need somebody to please tell me that that fancy book is still intact!"
"By 'fancy book', I take it you mean our meal ticket to Earth?" Loona asked, feigning the innocence she hadn't had in her body for essentially a decade. When Blitzø nodded, she twisted her hand to pull the Grimoire out of the small pocket dimension she managed to create – it was one of the most complicated, exhausting things she'd ever done, and took almost three days to ensure she got right, but she showed that stupid book's speciest excerpt about Hellhounds and their supposed Magical Ineptitude what's fucking what! – and held it up. "Yeah. I got it."
"Good job, Loony! Good girl!" The pride she felt for managing a difficult spell was suddenly overwhelmed by annoyance as Blitzø cooed at her. He held out–Oh, this motherfucker is not offering her a dog treat! "You get a tweat now!"
"Piss off, Blitz." Loona growled. She leaned back in disgust as he tossed the cookie up and just ate it. "Ugh, you're so gross!"
"Love you, too, Loony!" Blitzø cooed up at her. He glanced around and then winked at her. "Wanna just open that portal up for daddy?"
"Some of the things you say, sir, I can never unhear."
Ugh, and to think she agreed with The Fatty on that. Loona needed a shower. She cracked the Grimoire open and found the appropriate spell.
"Just-just go kill this bitch. Fuck." Loona scowled as she opened the portal to Earth in a nearby alleyway. Millie and Blitzø whooped, with the latter jumping in almost instantly, and the former paused for another Blitzø-patented one-liner.
"...I fucking hate my fa–ugh, Blitzø." Loona grumbled as she closed the portal and tucked the Grimoire away to its pocket dimension once more. She pulled her phone out and went back to searching for a new office space. As she scrolled through Sinstagram, she found a post from some loser named PartyMarty; according to his bio, he was a budding stand-up artist that had friends in the right places or some shit. Well, she could use a quick laugh, and so opened the story.
The dingo-like Hellhound's story started with him at a party, a rave? Meh, something that wasn't usually Loona's scene. She was open to them, but what with her childhood and being adopted by Blitzø...Yeah, parties weren't exactly Loona's thing.
After that came a quick clip of–Hold on. Loona turned the volume on and swiped the story scene back.
"Whoo! Yeah! Queen Bee's parties' off the chucking farts!" The camera bounced with who Loona presumed to be PartyMarty as a loud club song drowned out all conversation. The camera stilled as a cup came into view. "Fuck money get bitches, amirite?! Yeah! Awoo!"
The cup disappeared with the sound of loud gulping, but the camera shifted, as if held at an angle, and showed a familiar loose, fluffy orange tail attached to a recognizable jean-clad rear pass by. The camera quickly lifted back up to focus on some crowd surfers.
She had to rewatch the story once more before she decided it was safer to think that was exactly who she thought it was.
Huh. Loona blinked as she let the story finish with a camera pan up to an unrecognizable forest before it ended. Didn't take him to be the party type. Fuck, what was his name? Navajo? Naraku? ...Shit, it was some kind of N-name. Whatever. ...Wonder why he came up to Pride for coffee if he was just going to be at that party in...Gluttony? Is their coffee that bad? When's the last time I had coffee? Hm...Coffee sounds like a good idea right now.
Loona nodded to herself, deciding that getting coffee was a better move than just loitering around a burnt building. Blitzø would call her when he's ready to go. Or he wouldn't and she'd get sole claim over the apartment. At that dark thought, Loona stopped for a moment, it felt like something just squeezed her insides, and took a moment to breathe. Another beat passed before she shook off the weird feeling that overcame her with the thought of Blitzø's death. He was just the guy that gave her somewhere to live before she would've had to figure it out herself.
"Fuck. I need coffee." Loona sighed and rubbed her head as she strode off for the nearest Hothead Cafe. Sure, the SatanFucks was closer, but Hothead had a better and (more importantly) cheaper blend. If she went back to searching for other stories that related to PartyMarty's, that wasn't anyone's fucking business but her own.
Vortex whistled as he took in the damage to his girlfriend's manor. The front doors were all but gone, and several windows were blown out. The 'Hive' was cracked with several of the hexagon panels missing. Furthermore, glass was everywhere along the lawn and path, and what looked like the back room's couch was half-way through the west-wing's wall.
He decided to make his way down here after his hearing came back about two hours ago, right as Josh was getting a few snarl-free selfies with a scratch-drunk Tex. Those photos, unfortunately for Ace, would never see the light of day. Furthermore, Vortex now owes Josh a new phone and he might have to cover the medical bill for the stitches in his hand.
"Holy shit, I thought you were just exaggerating when you said she was in a fight." Verosika said as she stepped up beside him. Vortex sighed and rubbed his face. Against his better judgment, the entire crew invited themselves to come help Bee with whatever clean up was needed. While he dreaded it, it was obvious their help was going to be welcome.
"Hate to see the other guy." One of the girls, who stood too far from Tex for him to identify by sound alone, muttered.
"Speak for yourself, Coco." Ace scoffed from where he stood with an arm around Josh's shoulders. Ah, and he identified the speaker. Bonus. "Whatever motherfucker picked a fight with Queen Bee has balls."
"Of the gargling variety!" Josh added with a snort and Ace grinned down at him.
"Exactly."
"Okay, as cute as your flirting is, let's go check on Bee, huh?" Verosika suggested, giving Vortex the nudge he needed to tear his eyes away from the damage. He nodded and led the crew in. A few subtle sniffs led him to furrow his brow.
"What the fuck?"
"What?"
"I don't smell anyone other than Bee and…" Vortex trailed off. He didn't exactly get why Bee was against introducing her brother to Verosika when she let him make runs to other rings, but she had laid it out in front of him as soon as he got the job: under no circumstances should the two be allowed to meet. Still, it was Bee's Ring, and her rules were her rules.
That is, until she agreed to lift them because of...well, this shitstorm.
"You? Kind of expected since you live with her most of the time." Verosika snorted as she looked around. "Goddamn, I've never seen this place fucking trashed before. The parties get wild, but the clean up is–what, magic?"
"Fishing for secrets already, Vee? Not cool."
Vortex turned and grinned as he greeted his girl with a hug. Was it a bit tighter than she was used to? Probably, but she didn't wince so she wasn't hurt. He was redirected to mesh his lips with hers, much to the playful gags and jeers of the crew behind him. The kiss broke before they pulled back and Vortex smiled at Bee, who cradled his face.
"Hey, babe," She said softly. "Sorry for the scare. Not intentional."
"Honestly? I prefer a butt-dial mid-fight than coming back to this completely unaware." Vortex admitted before he hugged her again. "Still, apology accepted. I knew you'd be okay. Where's–?"
"Hel-lo, snack." Kat was the first to purr, her greeting swiftly joined by a bunch of elated Succubi and Incubi gasps. From the corner of his eye, Vortex could even see his boss had gone wide eyed and slack-jawed.
While he wondered that was about, the reaction that made him look was when he felt Bee flinch in his arms. Determined to see the cause of a reaction, Vortex pulled out of his hug to see a very cut up, and very cut, Foxfiend. See, Vortex knew that Bee's 'little brother' wasn't a total Sloth, but given that the demon never ventured out without instruction to, he never considered that the Foxfiend in question would be fit. This was only obvious to him now because the 'layabout' was clad in less cloth than his adoptive sister. There were even scars in places that made Vortex wonder how the fuck he survived; one in particular was a star-burst of cream fur on the left side of his chest.
"Okay, Bee, we fixed the east wing's hot tub, so can I rela–?" Naruto looked up and took in the many faces staring at him. Then he looked at Bee, brows furrowed and lip curled. "You did not schedule a party tonight, did you?"
AN: Whoo! Ch 2, done in record time! Got a fire under my ass, atm, and I'm riding it! ...God, I hope it's nothing contagious.
(Also, apologies to anyone named Marty. Nothing against you, personally, the name just fits.)
Thanks for reading, and remember!
It's just fucking fan-fiction