This light of the streetlamp seemed to glow just that little bit brighter than usual tonight. It's fluorescence creeping in through the gaps in her blinds and keeping her awake. Usually while Nero was away, she would struggle to sleep. Having him close for so much of her life meant that being apart came with a certain level of anxiousness. Nico's loud snoring could be heard from all the way downstairs, and though comforting, reminding her that Nero was home. Just down the hall, not far away. Her long nightie felt tight, and her hands felt clammy. For the seven years they had been dating, tonight was the first time she felt the need to hold him while she slept. They had never shared a bed, and she knew that they would one day. But this moment was hitting her like a tonne of bricks.
'I think it's time to grow up. We aren't kids anymore. Sleeping in the same bed is what all adults do. I can do this!' She slapped her cheeks and braced herself for the bravery she didn't know she had.
Opening the door was so much louder than she had anticipated. Creaking for every agonising second of the swing and halting immediately after she was out. The hum of the fridge and the incessant snoring kept going through the disturbance. The kids also seemed to remain quiet. No one would know she was out of her bed, and she gave a tentative step into the hall. After no indication of squeaking floorboards, she tiptoed down the length up to the final door in the house.
The doorhandle was terrifying. The fear that emanated from the thought of turning it made her feel like a 10-year-old trying not to get caught reading after hours. She was 22, and not a child anymore. It was correct on paper, but the actions just stayed a conflict in her mind.
I'm not a child. We are dating and we don't have to answer to anyone.
Taking a deep breath in, she held it and pushed the door open. It was almost silent, and the tiny motes of dust filtered through the cracks of light from the large window. His bed was a complete mess as Nero had seemingly just collapsed haphazardly across the edge of the bed. His shirt rode up a little on the back and his hands held the pillow in place for his cheek to rest upon. Of course, all the blankets were pushed off and gathered in the corner. There was plenty of room in the bed closest to the wall. She just needed to get the courage to climb in next to him.
He looks so peaceful while he sleeps. I shouldn't disturb him.
Her face fell as she realised; she was backing out. Hand back on that handle she struggled to open in the first place.
No, no, no! You are doing great. You have come this far. Nero would never ask you to leave, so you are the only thing standing in the way of your happiness.
She puffed up her cheeks and blew out all the remaining fear. She grasped the end of the bed rail and climbed over the cold metal. It creaked under her hands, and the mattress sprung back and forth ever so slightly as she allowed it to support her weight. Thankful for Nero's insistence that he not use the blankets, Kyrie pulled them up high over her chest and lay staring straight at the ceiling. Her heart was racing, and she could hear a pounding in her ear. Kyrie felt as though she was sweating buckets yet stayed perfectly still.
Nero shifted in his sleep, lying on his right side, giving the singer a full view of his back and broad shoulders. His light breathing caused his frame to rise and fall in a calming rhythm that gave Kyrie the courage to stay. Her hand reached out and brushed against the small of his back. He was so warm. She couldn't help but press her head to his back and use him for warmth. Among the sheets and blankets, grasping his shirt and pressed ever so slightly into his back, Kyrie found herself drifting out of consciousness.