John opened his eyes to be greeted by semi-darkness. All he could smell was fresh sheets, his own sweat, and the calming scent of the omega woman from before. Her fingers were lazily carding through his damp blonde locks as he slept, just like his mother used to. He nestled further into her touch. He wasn't ready to fully wake up to face the shame just yet. There was something safe and enclosed about this room. It was small, but not too small. It was clean, almost sterile. It had a nice, dim, hazy atmosphere. It was designed for calmness and peace.
He gradually became aware of a slight ache in the back of his hand. He flexed his fingers and winced. As he opened his tired eyes, he looked down to find a needle embedded in a vein there. He followed the tube up to a bag of saline and some other drugs. A hospital? He took in a breath and was surprised that no other scents invaded his senses. It was like he was in a small box. Just the two of them. A heat room…He was still a little hot, but aside from that, he felt much better. The crippling need and lust were gone. The sickly sweet slick had dried up. The ache in his pelvis had subsided. His senses had calmed somewhat, leaving him feeling relaxed. He looked down, embarrassed to find that he'd been stripped and changed in his sleep. He was wearing simple white hospital pyjamas, his body covered by a thin cotton sheet.
"How are you feeling?" the woman asked in a gentle tone. John felt vulnerable as he buried his face in the crisp sheets, bringing them up to his nose like a guilty child. They were a little scratchy, but still fresh.
"Better," he replied in a meek voice, almost purring as she pressed a little harder on his scalp. "Sorry for the trouble," he added sheepishly, as heat rush to his cheeks. He was sure the couple had been on their way home, likely looking forward to a quiet evening in. Instead, they'd been dragged into his problems and had taken responsibility for him. The woman seemed indifferent to his apology.
"It's no trouble at all, and I'm glad you're alright. I was worried when you passed out." John's eyes widened a little at the news. He remembered not feeling well and lying down on the back seat. It wouldn't have surprised him to hear he'd fallen asleep, but passed out? I must have been more dehydrated than I thought…That likely wasn't surprising with the heat. The rise in his body temperature meant he'd been sweating more than usual. "You're looking better. Your friend will be pleased…He should be here soon," she added as she looked at her watch.
"Friend?" John's chest tightened anxiously as he wondered who she'd been in contact with. She sensed his distressed and ran her hand further down to gently soothe the back of his neck. A small purr escaped him at her calming touches. She was so soothing. She seemed to know each place to pet and caress in order to calm him. It seemed she definitely had experience. If she wasn't some sort of social worker, she was probably a mother.
"Takigawa. He was very worried about you, you know." John's cheeks coloured at her response. She also sensed a wave of relief wash over him. She remained a while longer until a nurse politely entered to give John some medication and check him over. John thanked the woman, who left with a smile and the assurance that she would leave her details so that he could thank her properly after his heat. The omega nurse was gentle as she turned over his hand and checked the needle. She checked his fluid levels and his charts before trying a little small talk.
"So, you're newly mated?" she pressed gently as she wrote on his papers. John stiffened at her question. Anxious energy flooded his senses. He stammered a little, looking down at the crumpled white sheets as he sat up and fiddled with his hands. It was true that he'd been mated. Unfortunately, it wasn't the happy occasion she was likely expecting. His heat had sped up already at the thought of Lin's inevitable arrival. His scent was thick with anxiety.
"I-I suppose so." It was obvious from the barely healing wound on his shoulder. Lin's bites from the previous month were still fresh and scabbed over. Smaller nail tracks prevented them from healing. He could feel the nurse examining him in every way. She was examining his timid, quivering form. She noticed the way he flinched when the topic turned towards his mate and the way he couldn't get his words out properly. She could also smell his nervousness. The edge of bitterness and distress.
"How have your heats been? According to your records…" she trailed off sheepishly, watching John wince. He knew what his records said. He'd been a beta until two months ago. The worst two months of his life so far.
"Bad." The nurse gave him a sympathetic look. She wanted to reassure him it would get better. It was more or less unheard of for this sort of thing to happen, especially given the biological differences between betas and omegas. There must have been a complete mix up with the records somewhere along the line…It was the only explanation. She remained a little longer, talking to him about the different options available for birth control and heat suppressants. The ones he was on now were used to suppress heats completely, but they were only used within the confines of the hospital, and only for emergencies. "Emergencies?"
"You were dehydrated and unresponsive when you were brought in, and delirious when you finally came round a little. The doctor decided it would be kinder to sedate and medicate you until your alpha could come and take you home." She didn't miss the wave of dread that washed over him at her words. He recoiled at the thought. I don't want to be reduced to…that…He could remember the needy sounds he'd made whenever Lin touched him. The way he'd opened his legs and quietly begged him to make him melt. I hate it…It isn't me! I'm not-His head jerked up as a knock sounded on the door.
"John! Thank God!" Takigawa sighed in relief as he stepped inside and shut the door, barely acknowledging the nurse as he hurried over to the bed. "What were you thinking? Going out during your heat is insane!" he scolded, though his tone was level and gentle. He could already see John was stressed, heavily medicated, and vulnerable. A wave of guilt and shame washed through the small room with John's distress.
"Sorry…" he murmured quietly, fisting his hands in the sheets. Seeing that they had some things to talk about, the nurse excused herself. Takigawa took the seat at John's bedside, watching as he pulled his knees up. He was careful of the drip as he hugged his knees. He didn't want to look Takigawa in the eye.
"Are you going to tell me why?" Takigawa asked gently, leaning forward to look at John's nervous face. He looked a little guilty as he turned his face to his knees.
"I didn't mean to get caught out…I just wanted to get away before…" Before your heat started. Takigawa ran a hand over his tied up hair. He was a little caught in the middle on this one. On the one hand, he fully understood John's feelings. He'd barely been an omega for more than a couple of hours when he'd been mated against his will. He hadn't really spent time bonding with his mate, so really it was all about sex. Sex wasn't something John was ready to accept yet. Not really. On the other hand, he knew Lin hadn't made the decision lightly. That wasn't what he was like. When he'd mated John, he'd had every intention of taking that duty seriously. The problem was that he'd respected John's feelings to the point of allowing their relationship to stagnate, reducing it to sex with little intimacy, and almost no interaction outside of John's heats.
"Before your heat started and Lin insisted on taking care of you?" John nodded his agreement. He hated it. It made him feel like a thing rather than a person. He was nothing but a hole for his alpha to fuck. He had no purpose beyond that anymore. Takigawa let out a small hum as he thought about what to say. As an omega, he knew that it wasn't just about the drive to procreate. There was a delicate balance between alphas and omegas. Betas wouldn't understand, looking in from the outside. It was often assumed that omegas were slaves to their alpha's needs, and it had been that way for a time. Things were different in the modern era though.
"I don't want to feel like this…Every month I turn into a-a complete slut!" John replied shamefully, the last word barely more than a whisper. Takigawa's eyes widened slightly. He'd never thought about it like that before. Omega education was very much designed to combat those sorts of negative thoughts. Something John hadn't been set up with. "I just let him do whatever he wants with my body! I can't keep my legs shut!" John almost flinched as Takigawa's hand touched his clothed shoulder. He squeezed softly, trying to offer a little comfort and understanding.
"The heat is part of being an omega, and that's nothing to be ashamed of. No one thinks that about you, Lin least of all…He was really scared, you know." Takigawa didn't miss the way John's head turned slightly at the news. He didn't believe it. Lin had mated him in a moment of weakness. Anything he felt was just duty and raging hormones. "I'm serious…All those times that Naru collapsed were nothing compared to you disappearing. He'd still be out there looking if we hadn't been contacted." The knowledge somehow made John feel better and worse at the same time. His omega side was purring at the knowledge, longing to crawl into its alpha's arms and make it better. In John's own mind, he just felt confused and guilty. He knew Lin hadn't exactly asked for this either. It also wasn't nice to make his friends and co-workers worry.
"It all feels so wrong…I promised myself, body and soul, to God…I was happy and satisfied with that, but now…" John murmured as he looked back over the past few months. He'd been content in his role. He'd never wavered. His devotion had been absolute, and his duties had always been performed with enthusiasm and care. I just don't know what I did wrong…Why did he do this to me? He felt as if he'd been left adrift with nothing to save him. I'm drowning…
"Maybe, once your heat is over, you could talk to someone…Someone at the church?" John nodded his agreement. He had spoken about it a few times, but nothing ever felt resolved. He knew he wouldn't be satisfied until he had a concrete reason for it all. To his knowledge, he'd done nothing to deserve such punishment, so surely the Lord had his reasons. I just wish I could figure them out…"You look a little better now, anyway…" Takigawa said as John finally dried his still damp eyes. As he sat up, there was a little more colour in his cheeks. He nodded his agreement as he leaned back. Takigawa had always made him feel more grounded. He was like everyone's favourite big brother. Despite being an omega, he had a proud, strong, grounding air and often led them all towards the answers they needed.
"Takigawa…When you first presented, how did you…" John trailed off, knowing it would likely be a sensitive topic of conversation, and likely not the first time he'd been asked. Takigawa looked almost sheepish as he crossed his legs and sat back, relaxing in his chair. He had an air of self-confidence that always surprised him. Until he'd met Takigawa, he'd imagined all omegas to be timid and shy, much like himself.
"How did I react? Well…I can't say I wasn't surprised. Most of my family are betas, and the only alpha is my mum. Secretly, she was thrilled to have an omega. She thought it was a chance to really bond with one of her children. I guess I took it pretty hard. Living in a temple is hard enough, but trying to focus while going through heats every month was hell. The other students weren't exactly easy to deal with, either. They only backed off because of my mum. Alphas get really protective during heats…Let's just say there was an incident, and I was never picked on again!" The thought of Takigawa needing protection made John smile. He must have been much smaller back then. It was unlikely anyone would try to pick on him now. "I guess I would have liked to be a beta back then, but now…It really doesn't bother me. I am what I am, and I'm happy with that," he offered with a softened expression. The look of warmth in his eyes made John wonder what, or who, he was thinking of. It was a look that made John's heart flutter just looking at it. He wondered if he'd ever come to look at anyone that way.
"And…your heats…Is there a way you found to…help?" Takigawa's cheeks flushed at the question. He coughed a few times to cover his embarrassment. He couldn't exactly give details. It was sort of a secret. John stiffened awkwardly. He knew it was an awkward topic, but he really needed help where these things were concerned. He'd only been an omega for two months. Luckily, Takigawa was sensitive to that. He wouldn't go into the exact details, but he'd tell him enough.
"Well…more recently I found an alpha. We're not mated, but we help each other out. When I go into heat, she sees me through it, and if an omega sends her into a rut, she'll call me. It's a mutually beneficial arrangement." He watched John's cheeks flush at the admission. He would never have accepted that as an option. He hadn't even wanted Lin to mate him, let alone a stranger. Maybe it isn't a stranger…"But when I was younger, I relied on a collection of…relief devices," Takigawa supplied sheepishly, his embarrassment telling John exactly what those devices were. Sex toys?
"Are those really the only options?" John asked uncomfortably as he squirmed on the sheets. He was relieved that the drugs had put his heat on hold, so he was no longer producing slick. He hated the warm, wet feeling between his thighs when the slick came.
"There's no shame in sex…especially if it's mutually enjoyable. Really, John, you have to give in to the heat. It isn't healthy to hold it off or suppress it, and if you don't take care of your body, you could die. That's why omegas have a close group of friends and relatives, or take mates. Someone needs to make sure you eat and drink, and not to mention there's the risk of hurting yourself. During one of my first heats, I was so hot I tried to climb out of my bedroom window on the fifth floor of the temple. Luckily, my mum was keeping an eye out for things like that." Takigawa watched John smile at his story. He could just imagine a young, skinny teen with messy brown hair crawling over the ledge to pull himself up onto a sloping rooftop. He wondered what Takigawa's mother was like. Was she a huge, towering woman? Or lithe and athletic like Ayako? "You shouldn't worry about that anyway. You have Lin. He's your alpha, whether you asked for it or not. Your body needs him now," Takigawa said firmly, watching John curl up again at his words.
"I don't need him." Takigawa sighed at the quiet rejection.
"What's so bad about needing someone? Does it make me any less of a person? I have the same heats every month." John quickly shook his head. He couldn't imagine Takigawa, a strong, proud man, being eaten away by lust and desire, even though he knew it must happen. He couldn't imagine it of Naru either. "It's a new and scary thing for you, I get it…but you're lucky that you don't have to do it alone…Just give your mate a chance. Lin's a good guy," Takigawa advised seriously, watching John waver a little at the suggestion. He hadn't really given Lin a chance. He'd avoided him at all costs, to the point of running off and getting himself in trouble. He closed his tearful eyes as he felt Takigawa's hand lace in his hair.