A Wolf Is A Wolf, Even In A Cage, Even Dressed In Silk
Summary: In which Laura Hale is given a second chance, thrown back in time to the very beginning. This time, she's determined to be the Alpha that the Pack needs. Even if it means going against her very own mother.
Peter-21
Laura-17
Derek-15
Cora-9
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Chapter 2: Grief Seems Overwhelming
…but life moves on and you will too
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"You want to what?"
Pulling out of the high school parking lot, Laura glanced over at her brother as he stared at her from the passenger side.
"We're going to have a memorial for Paige," she stated simply, careful to keep her voice calm and steady. "I didn't know her, not like you did, but I would've liked to get to know the girl who had my brother moonstruck. I'm sorry you had to lose her, Derek."
It was quiet for a long moment as he avoided her eyes, fingers twisting into fists.
"I'm sorry too," his voice came in a whisper.
"Tell me about her?"
He cast her a suspicious look and she glanced over, eyes connecting with his briefly before she had to focus on the road again.
"Derek, I swear I'll never let anyone know your secrets, as long as they don't harm others or yourself. I'm your sister and I love you. I hate seeing you in pain like this. Nothing you tell me will ever be repeated."
He stared at her for a minute, considering.
Then, shoulders straightening as if he were bracing himself, Derek took a deep breath and opened his mouth. "She loved music. It was relaxing for her. That's how we met, you know? She was playing the cello and I was being a jerk playing around with a basketball."
A chuckle left her as she imagined that scenario.
"What happened?"
A huffed, strained laugh left Derek as he smiled at the thought. "I was curious so I followed her. She didn't want me interrupting her practice but agreed to give me her name if I could play one instrument in the room. I played the triangle and she told me her name. After that… we stuck together."
Laura stayed quiet, listening. It wasn't the time for her to talk. It was time for her to listen to her little brother.
"She was incredible, Laura. She was quiet and thoughtful and she was nice. When she was with me, I felt like the luckiest person in the world," his green eyes filled with tears as he sniffled, voice thick. "I felt so loved, Laura, and I loved her so much. I've never felt that way about anyone before."
Pulling up to the Preserve, Laura put the car in park and didn't waste a moment gathering her brother into her arms. He went willingly, curling into her as he buried his face in her shoulder.
"I'm so sorry you lost her, Derek," she crooned into his ear, brushing a kiss against the side of his head as her arms tightened around him. "You are so loved. We're going to get through this together."
"Together," he murmured into her shoulder, head nodding jerkily.
With one last kiss to his head and a firm squeeze, she pulled away and slipped out of the car, grabbing the duffel bag in the backseat before heading into the woods. Derek followed quietly, small sniffles and the scent of saltwater reaching her.
It didn't take long to find the clearing she'd scoped out for this and get everything set up. There was a vanilla scented candle, one she'd bought from Aria that was meant to help ease the passage into the afterlife, a box of smooth river stones, a permanent marker, and a lighter.
Once everything was set up and they were both settled cross legged on the ground, Laura began the small ceremony.
"I wasn't sure what would work but I thought she would've liked something small and personal. So we're going to light this candle in honor of her and say a few words. After that, I thought we could write things on the stones and bury them as a memorial to her," Laura rambled nervously, playing with the lighter. "I wasn't sure what to do but-"
Derek interrupted her quietly, cutting off her rambling. "Paige would have liked it. She liked more personal stuff than big gestures."
Mouth closing, her nerves eased at the reassurance and she lit the candle, inhaling the soothing scent of vanilla.
She glanced at her brother, who seemed unsure how to start, and decided to begin.
"Hi Paige," she whispered, voice soft and warm. "You don't know me and I don't know you but I wish I could've had the chance to get to know you. You lit up my brother's life and you made him so happy. I can't thank you enough for that. Wherever you are, I hope you find peace."
It wasn't anything particularly poetic but it was honest. It was how she truly felt.
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"Thank you," Derek murmured, voice raw but thankful as he squeezed her in a tight hug before running off inside.
Laura watched him go, tucking her keys in her jacket, as she followed him at a slower pace.
"Laura."
The call of her name made her feet switch direction as she poked her head into the study.
Seated at the desk, Talia smiled expectantly. She was still in her business clothes, as if she'd only just come back from the office.
"Come join me. We have a few things to discuss."
Dread curled low in her belly and Laura nodded, closing the door quietly behind her as she stepped further inside.
"What's going on, Mom?"
"Sweetie, as much as I love your little bonding moments with your siblings, I feel the need to remind you that you need to keep a safe distance. It's better for everyone that way."
Anger sparked in her chest, slowly warming and gathering fuel.
"What you must remember, Laura, is that Alphas keep their own confidence. Certain people of the Pack, such as your Right and Left Hands, know what they need to, no more than that."
Talia's voice from years before, when she was barely old enough to sit in the armchair of the study without her legs dangling above the floor, echoed through her mind.
Laura had wanted to be just like her mother, well-respected by many Packs, known as one of the most powerful Alphas in North America. She'd been so eager to be the next Hale Alpha, building her confidence as she soaked in her mother's lessons like a sponge.
The Hale House Fire had given her the ruby eyes she'd wanted so desperately but Laura hadn't wanted it at that point.
Yet Laura had clung tightly to her mother's advice and fled with Derek, abandoning her poor Uncle to the hunters.
She'd done her best to be a good Alpha to her younger brother but even then, she'd only hurt him further as he drew more into himself.
Laura knew how horrible of an Alpha she was and the sight of the ruby red eyes in the mirror was more of a mocking taunt than anything to be proud of.
On one particularly bad night in New York, Laura had tried to claw them out of her face but Derek had caught her before she could finish the deed.
If the price of Alphahood was the loss of her Pack, she had no qualms returning it.
After that incident, Laura had finally decided to toss aside her mother's advice. Clearly, she wasn't meant to be an Alpha like her mother and she was fine with that.
She'd returned to Beacon Hills at the news of the spirals carved into dead deer found around the town, hunting down Adrian Harris as the one who gave the formula for the accelerant to Kate.
That night, when she ran into a feral Peter, Laura's guilt had overwhelmed her.
When he'd attacked her with the intent to kill, she'd let him, crying apologies even as he ripped her throat out with a mouth full of fangs.
Laura deserved it. She deserved every bit of pain as she was killed, every bite and scratch from his claws.
She'd failed to notice the signs of the threat around her younger brother.
She hadn't been there to save her Pack from the fire-hadn't even been there to try.
She'd abandoned a packmate to die, to suffer on his own.
She'd failed to help her younger brother as he drowned in his own guilt and shame over the fire.
In her desire to earn her mother's approval, Laura had made so many mistakes. She'd realized somewhere along the line that her mother's approval wasn't a goal she wanted to reach for any longer. If that was what it took to have her approval, Laura didn't want it.
"Better for who exactly?" She asked, voice slow and careful as she tilted her head just slightly. "Certainly not better for Derek or Cora, or even me."
By now, Talia's smile was a rough, flattened thing, angry at her questioning. She was used to her orders being followed without question.
Too bad Laura was determined to stop doing that.
"Laura, you will be Alpha after I step down. There is a certain distance from other Pack members that you must maintain. It's safer for everyone as you carry the responsibility of the entire Pack. You are meant to protect and lead them."
Laura opened her mouth to respond but her mother was quick to cut her off.
"Enough, Laura. Cease your petty arguments."
Oh, that was the Alpha voice.
It held a strength that pressed down on her, commanding her to obey.
Laura was suddenly absurdly grateful she had never used it on Derek. He hadn't deserved it, never, and she'd never force anyone to do what they didn't want to.
She didn't want to be Alpha. After her disastrous first attempt, Laura was terrified of repeating the pain she'd caused.
Yet….
A heavy weight settled over her shoulders as she came to a startling revelation.
Laura didn't want to be Alpha but she may not have a choice.
If things continued the way they originally had, Talia would push their Pack past the point of breaking.
The cracks had always been there (her suspicious treatment of Uncle Peter, the pride she took in how 'civilized' their Pack was, the distance she kept between herself and the Pack, just to name a few) but they would deepen and spread the longer Talia was Alpha.
Laura had made awful mistakes and she was terrified of repeating them.
Like it or not, she was next in line to be Alpha.
"I understand, Mom," Laura conceded, mind working through this revelation.
Talia's smile bloomed with satisfaction. "I knew you'd see things my way, Laura. I have some reports to look through so if you'd please leave me to them."
"Of course."
Leaving the study, Laura climbed the stairs and made a quick pit stop in her room, grabbing one of the untouched journals laying around from a previous birthday and the little sunflower covered pencil bag she kept her pens in.
Sufficiently armed, she made her way to the library a few doors down.
It was a room she'd barely ever been in, holding more interest in the newest makeup trends and gossip about boys than any of the old tomes that occupied its space.
The shelves were massive, stretching from the floor to the ceiling. Every inch of space was packed with leather bound books, some older than others.
Skimming a finger over the spines delicately, the eldest Hale child frowned thoughtfully as she tried to decide where it would be best to start.
"When in doubt, start with the basics," she told herself, pulling out the first three books to catch her attention.
The first was a book on pack hierarchy, recording the intricate details of roles within the pack.
The second was a book on treaties, holding every recorded treaty the Hale Pack had ever held with other packs or anyone really.
The third and final book of her choices was one on magical runes.
Tying her hair back in a quick ponytail, Laura settled down on the worn leather couch and pulled out a simple black pen, flipping to the first page of the book on treaties as she got ready to take notes.
She'd only had her mother's information and influence to rely on the first time around. It was past time she looked for other sources of information and conducted her own research.