Okay so I read a message and the person wrote that they were confused about the direction the story was going. Although I don't see how, I think it's laid out pretty clear. Anyway, this particular anonymous guest was upset because apparently he/she thought Olivia and Fitz were going to sleep together on the first chapter. And that's just not the case. If you've read any of my other two stories, you'd know that I like to incorporate other characters besides Olivia and Fitz into my stories. I also like to build my stories up. So it may feel like the story is moving along slowly, but that's just how I write. I think in the end, it makes for a better story to build up the plot. So obviously we know that Olivia and Fitz are going to sleep together at some point, but as far as a relationship goes, I have no idea how many chapters I will write before that happens. So to that one anonymous guest, you're just going to have to be patience. Alrighty then, chapter four...
Chapter Four: Jazmine
The next morning Fitz woke up earlier than he had initially planned. He wasn't on call at the hospital, and he didn't have any appointments at the practice until late afternoon. He planned on staying in bed and catching up on some much needed sleep. But he changed his plans yesterday, after his little argument with Erika. There was no way he could leave things the way they were between them.
So instead of his morning in bed, he got up early showered and got dressed. He had on a pair of dark colored jeans, a tan long sleeved shirt and a pair of brown loafers. He grabbed an apple form the fruit bowl on his counter top and headed out the door.
It took him a little less than twenty minutes to get to his sisters houses, passing Olivia's house along the way. He tried to look for a sign that she was home and awake, but saw none. The lights were still off, and the curtains were still closed. He knew she liked to open them in the mornings to let in the sunlight, although Olivia was a low key nudist, and liked to walk around the house butt ass naked whenever she could. Fitz would always have to warn her, whenever she would walk around in her birthday suit, that people could possibly see her if she insisted on having the curtains open. Fitz smiled, thinking about how comfortable Olivia was with her body. And how bold and carefree she was, that he could wake up in the morning to find her cooking breakfast in nothing but an apron.
When he pulled into his sister's driveway, he shut off his engine and got out. As he was walking to the door, he heard someone calling his name from behind him. He looked, and saw his sister running up to the house in her workout clothes. He'd forgotten that she liked to run early in the morning. It also reminded him of how much he hated that. She would sometimes go running before the sun even came up, and the fact that she ran alone, worried Fitz even more.
"What are you doing here?" Erika asked. Fitz could hear in her voice that she was still a little upset with him, although she was trying to hide it.
"What do you mean what am I doing here?" Fitz met up with her at the stone path to the front door. "I upset you yesterday. This is me apologizing."
"Really? I haven't heard an apology yet."
"I apologize."
"For?" Erika asked, smirking.
"Milking it to the end I see." Fitz laughed along with her. "Alright, I'm sorry for upsetting you. And especially for giving you just the slightest thought that I didn't love you. You're my baby sister and I love you."
"I might've been a little overly emotional."
"No, it's on me. I was just a little-"
"Jealous of Blair." Erika teased.
"I don't want to talk about that. You forgive me or not." Fitz asked, holding out his arms.
"Yeah, I guess." Erika smiled, and walked into her brothers arms. He had forgotten that she'd just come from a run, and was more than likely sweaty. But as soon as she made contact with him, he felt her slick, hot skin.
"Eww, you're sweaty."
"Well I did just come from a run you big dummy." Erika stepped out of his arms, as he pretended to wipe her sweat off him. "You wanna come in, or do you wanna stand outside the rest of the day." Erika didn't wait for him to respond, just walked to her front door, knowing he would follow.
"What are doing up so early? I'd thought you would be sleeping in, if you didn't have to work." Erika walked in the house, and sat her keys and IPod on the foyer table. She went into the kitchen to grab a Gatorade.
"That was the plan, but plans change." Fitz sat at the bar, across from Erika.
"You hungry? I could cook." Erika asked, after she drank almost all the Gatorade in one gulp.
"Not if you're gonna make some of that nasty health crap you eat." Fitz complained. Erika wasn't a big health nut, but she liked to try and eat healthy foods. While she thought her foods were great, everyone else thought it taste bland and just plain old nasty.
"Pancakes? What about pancakes, does that suffice to you your highness?"
"As long as they taste like mom's."
Erika rolled her eyes. "Ugh, momma's boy." She turned to the cabinets and the fridge to get the ingredients to make the pancakes, when she discovered she didn't have any eggs. Since Fitz didn't want to go to the store right now, she made him walk over to Olivia's house to borrow some eggs.
X
Olivia had woke earlier than usual this morning. She had a restless night, tossing and turning most of the time. She had several things on her mind. One being Blair, and the other being the call she got from Ms. Hannigan, from the adoption agency. She had called Olivia shortly after she went to sleep. It was a little late, but Olivia still answered the phone. Ms. Hannigan informed her that a pregnant mother had taken interest in Olivia's profile that she left with the adoption agency.
For a couple of months, Olivia had been meeting with Ms. Hannigan, and she would setup appointments for Olivia to meet with expectant mothers who were giving up their baby for adoption. The mothers would look over Olivia's and several other family's profile and if they wanted to, a meeting would be set up. It was really so the mother could get to know the family beyond their profile. They all just wanted to make sure that the child they were giving up, was going to a loving home. And would have parents that could take care of them, and not in just the financial sense.
Olivia had already met with two other women, not counting the ones she met with when she was with Fitz. But the two women ended up choosing another family. They both had loved Olivia, but in the other families, there was a husband and wife, as opposed to a single mother.
So last night, when Ms. Hannigan called about another mother, Olivia was both excited and nervous. She wanted to make a good impression, but didn't want to come off as trying too hard, or fake. She knew to just be herself, and answer the questions the girl might have. But all last night, all Olivia could think about was the meeting she would have with the girl the next morning. It was short notice, but the girl was already eight months pregnant. She had turned down a few other mothers and even a few couples already and time was running out for her to find another family.
Ms. Hannigan had emailed the girl's profile to Olivia after they had hung up. So the next morning, Olivia was looking over it, on her surface pro, as she ate her breakfast. The girl's name was Jazmine Foresmith. She was a seventeen year old senior in high school, and eight and a half months pregnant with her first child. There wasn't much info about her other than her health background and a few pieces of detail about her. The father of her child was listed as unknown, but there was several pictures of Jazmine in the email. She was a beautiful girl. She had kinky, thick, jet black hair, which just barely reached her shoulders. She had bright hazel eyes, with just a hint of green in the middle. And light brown fair skin. Most of the pictures were just head shots, but there was one and it was the most recent. It was a picture of Jazmine standing next to an older woman. She had on a long pink sundress that highlighted her large baby bump well.
Olivia's heart swelled, as she looked at the picture of a pregnant Jazmine and what might possibly be her unborn child. She knew not to get too excited, but she just couldn't help herself. How could she not get excited?
She was distracted from the email, when Blue started barking at the door. She only did that, when someone was at the door. And since Olivia didn't have her curtains opened, she couldn't see anyone. She normally had them opened to let in the sun, but she wasn't dressed at all. And after years of Fitz scolding her for walking in front of the windows naked, she had finally learned her lesson when the mail lady saw her in her birthday suit. Olivia wasn't all that worried about it, she was comfortable in her own skin. It was only breast, what was the big deal. But apparently the woman delivering her mail had a few things to say. More than a few things in the four page letter she left in Olivia's mailbox the next morning.
Olivia went back upstairs to quickly grab her robe, and by the time she came back downstairs, someone was knocking on the door. She still had her scarf on her head, but didn't care enough to take it off before she answered the door. It was too early, and she didn't feel like taking her hair down if she wasn't going anywhere. Blue was still barking at the door, as Olivia unlocked it. When she finally opened it, Blue rushed out, Olivia was about to call her back before she saw who was outside.
"Fitz?" Olivia questioned. Watching Fitz pick Blue up off the ground and rubbing her belly.
"I can't believe this old fart is still alive." Fitz said, still rubbing Stormy's belly. "Isn't she supposed to be dead?"
"Why does everyone keep saying that? I keep telling you she's gonna outlive us all."
Fitz finally looked up at Olivia with a smile on his face, which quickly disappeared the moment he laid eyes on her. She was standing there in nothing but her short silk robe, loosely tied at her waist. His eyes traveled from her face, down to her chest and further to her bare legs. The robe she had on, barely covered her thighs, leaving her legs almost completely bare. He had to hold onto Blue a little tighter to keep himself from reaching out to touch her. His smile turned into a smirk, when Olivia tightened her robe, glancing down shyly at the ground.
"Hello Olivia."
"Hey." She replied quietly. "What are you doing here?"
"Eggs." Fitz said, gaining a confused expression from Liv.
"You drove all the way over here from you apartment for eggs?"
"No, I was over at E's house. I needed to talk to her this morning-"
"To apologize I presume." Olivia said.
"Yeah, how'd you know?"
"I'm one of her best friends Fitz, I'm like a big sister to her. She tells me everything. Including all you business." Olivia walked away from the door, heading back to the kitchen. Fitz followed behind her, shutting and locking the door behind him. He knew how skittish Olivia was with unlocked doors and windows. "So why do you need my eggs?"
"Erika's making breakfast, and she doesn't have any eggs."
"You're going to eat Erika's cooking?" Olivia asked astonished. Everyone knew she couldn't cook, and knew to stay clear away from her food.
"Well I was, but now that I'm here." Fitz picked up Olivia's plate off the table, and started eating it.
"Hey!" Olivia tried to get the plate back, but he moved it out of her reach. "I could've just made you a plate had you asked."
Fitz shrugged, "This one was already fixed." He spoke with a mouth full of salmon patties, rice and eggs. He loved Olivia's cooking. She was from the south and her cooking certainly showed. He'd never eaten some of the foods Olivia cooked, and he'd never eaten as much as he had when he was with Olivia.
Olivia sat in the seat across from Fitz, with Blue on her lap. She could remember sitting at the table like this with Fitz on the very few days she had a slow morning before work. She use to find herself just staring at Fitz, when she should be doing other things. Even if he would just be doing the most mundane and normal things, she just couldn't help but stare at him.
"What?" Fitz asked mid bite, when he noticed her staring at him.
"You're greedy." Olivia decided to say, instead of the real reason she was staring at him. It was only then, that she remembered she still had her scarf on her head. Fitz had seen her with it on many of times, they'd even had sex with her scarf still on her head. Which was why she had no idea why she was suddenly feeling self-conscious. With one quick motion, Olivia pulled the scarf off her head and finger combed her hair a few times while he was still looking away from her.
"You redecorated." Fitz commented, noting the new wall colors and entirely different décor in all the rooms. It still looked like Olivia's taste. Expensive and classy, but still had a homey feel to it. "It looks good. Doesn't even look like the same house."
"It's not supposed to." Olivia said rather quickly. "It was hard enough living in the house after we divorced, but this is the house I wanted to raise my children in. I love this house. So instead of buying a different house, I redecorated."
"Olivia." Fitz sighed, putting his fork down. "I, I don't think I ever really apologized for the way things ended between us-"
"No need."
"No really. I'm sorry, truly. Everything was just moving too fast with the adoption agency, and the baby. I wasn't over losing our unborn children, and then the surrogacy didn't happen. And then we were gonna adopt this baby that we knew nothing about. I was scared, I admit that. And I felt that we were replacing our kids with this baby, and I didn't like that."
"Why didn't you come to me and say that?" Olivia asked. "Fitz we could've slowed down. Yes I really wanted a child, but if you weren't ready, we could've waited a while. If you needed time to mourn for our children, why didn't you just say that?"
"I didn't want- I didn't know how to tell you."
"You simply say 'Olivia, I'm not ready to adopt a child right now. Can we wait a while?' You don't divorce me instead Fitz. It was a pretty stupid and fucked up thing to do."
"You were so ready to have a child Liv."
"Yeah, and you weren't, I get that now. I get that you wanted to have a kid of your own. And I get that you left me because I couldn't give you that. But…"
"But what?"
"Was is worth it Fitz?" Olivia asked, her eyes filling with tears. No matter how hard she tried to hold them in, they kept falling. "Two years later and you're in the same position. You don't have anyone, and you don't have that perfect child you left me for. So was it worth giving up on us? On me? Was it worth losing me?"
Fitz could tell the exact moment when she went from being sad to angry. She was no longer crying sad tears, those were angry tears running down her cheeks. He could tell it in her voice, and her body language. Before she was slightly slouched in her seat avoiding his eye contact. Now she sat straight up, glaring into his eyes. She had also been softly rubbing Blue's fur, but now she had one fist clenched onto the doggy poncho he had on. She had her other hand resting on the table, and he reached for it. He was surprised when she didn't pull her hand from his.
He leaned into the table and spoke, while staring her in the eyes. "No. It wasn't worth it. I've missed you every day that we've been apart. Not a day has gone by that I haven't thought about you, and regretted what I did."
Olivia contemplated what he just said, while giving her a little time to think about what she was going to say next. "What?"
Olivia didn't know what to say. She hadn't talk to him in two years, and over the past few days since they reconnected. Things had been tense at first. But yesterday, at the birthday party she felt things were somewhat better. They had been able to have a conversation with each other without yelling or arguing or insult. They just genuinely enjoyed being in the others company. Now he was telling her how much he missed her. How he thought about her every day and how he regretted what he did. Did he wanted her back? What was she supposed to say to that? Did he expect her to just forget about everything he's put her through? To just forgive him and pretend nothing happen, so that things could go back to the way they were? How could things every go back to the way they are.
When Fitz came over to Olivia's house this morning, he had no intention of saying any of this to her. He only intended to ask for the eggs and go back to his sister's house. He didn't plan on anything else, because he hadn't expected Olivia to even invite him in. Yet alone sitting down for breakfast.
He sat in his chair, whit his eyes glued to Olivia and vice versa. He didn't know what he expected her to say, but the deafening silence was killing him. He just basically bared his heart to her right now, and it had rendered her silent. He thought hell would've frozen over, before Olivia Pope ran out of words.
"Liv say something." Fitz spoke softly, after he couldn't handle the silence anymore.
"I… I don't know what you want me to say Fitz-"
"Liv I know I messed up okay, and I'm sorry about that I truly am. But I know now what I want now-"
"Fitz you don't want to adopt a baby with me, you still want a kid I can't give you. I would've been willing to put an adoption on hold two years ago, but now I'm not. I'm adopting a baby with or without you. And I can't ask you to be a part of that, knowing you can't guarantee you'll give it one hundred percent. A child deserves two dedicated parents in its life."
"Liv-"
"No Fitz, it wouldn't be right to him or her, to bring him into… whatever dysfunctional shit we are. It's not what you want, and I'm not going to force it on you."
"I know what I want Olivia."
"No you don't. You're just emotional right now, and you're just talking before you even think about what you're saying and-"
Before Olivia could finish her sentence, Fitz had stood up from his chair. He grabbed her by her arms and swiftly lifted her off her chair and onto the kitchen table. Poor Stormy had to shoot off Olivia's lap, before she got smashed between Olivia and Fitz.
Fitz was moving off instinct and moved so quickly, that he couldn't think about what he was doing, before he felt Olivia's soft plump lips meet his in a searing kiss. As soon as his lips touched hers, he heard a deep moan escape from her. He felt her small hands run up his chest and find their way into his hair. Instinctively his own hands found their way to her waist, pulling her to the edge of the table. At the same time pulling her sex closer to his.
The kiss began in a sweet and gentle way. But when Olivia simultaneously locked her legs around him, and used her hand to pull him closer by his ass, Fitz lost all control. He plunged his tongue in her mouth, bringing his hands up from her waist, to hold onto her face. He sucked on her tongue and groaned, when she bite his lip in return. All that could be heard in that quiet house, was Olivia and Fitz moans and the sounds of wet kisses. Fitz was just about to lay Olivia back onto the table, when someone rang the doorbell.
Only then did Olivia come back to reality, and pushed Fitz off of her. They both stood silently starring at each other. Breathing heavy, chests heaving trying to catch their breaths. The doorbell rang again, and Olivia got off the table. She went to the kitchen and grabbed the entire carton of eggs, shoving it in Fitz's arms. She pushed him back through the house and to the door. The entire time, while Olivia had a look of horror and confusion on her face. Fitz wore a stupid cheesy smile on his face. He was enjoying this, he truly was. Seeing Olivia riled up like this, over his kiss was simply entertaining.
He wore that smile on his face the entire time Olivia pushed him to the door. His smile changed when they got to the door, and it turned into a devilish smirk when he saw who the person was standing at the door, ringing the doorbell for the past two minutes.
"Blair?" Olivia was shocked to see him at her doorstep, holding a dozen red roses. She subconsciously pulled her robe closer together and tightened the straps. "What are you doing here?" Olivia asked. Blair didn't answer her right away, because he was too busy staring at a smirking Fitz, standing too close to Olivia for his liking.
"I uh, I was going to take you to breakfast. But if you're busy-"
Fitz raised his eyebrows to the man in astonishment. Was he really going to leave me here alone with Olivia? Fitz knew if he had caught another man, not to mention an ex-husband, around Olivia he would never leave the two of them alone. No matter how much he trusted Olivia, he would never trust a man to not get tempted by her.
"No no, Fitz was just leaving." Without giving him a chance to talk, Olivia subtly pushed Fitz out her door.
"Nice roses." Fitz commented to Blair, a Liv pushed him out. Olivia rolled her eyes, knowing why he made that comment. Everyone knew she hated roses; everyone except Blair. "See you later Liv." Fitz waved at her, a smile spreading on his face, as he walked away.
"You coming in?" Olivia asked, stepping away from the door so he could walk in.
"You look nice." Blair said, eyeing her short silk robe. He was trying to hide the fact that it bothered him that she walked around the house like that. Especially when she had company, not to mention the company was her ex.
Olivia caught the underlying tone in his voice, but chose to ignore it.
"These are for you." Blair gave her the roses, and Olivia plastered the best fake smile she could muster up, offering a less than enthusiastic 'thanks'. "What's wrong? You don't like them?"
"No, they're nice. I just don't really like roses. Tiger lilies are my favorite."
"Oh. How come you didn't tell me before? I could've gotten you lilies."
"Tiger lilies, and you've been to my house before. There isn't one single rose in my house, there's only tiger lilies. Besides I told you I didn't like roses, after you sent two dozen to my office."
"No actually you yelled at me for sending roses to your job."
"I did not yell. " Olivia corrected him. "I just told you that it was a bit much. You sent two big ass bouquets of flowers to my job. I didn't even have anywhere to put them. You know what, it doesn't matter. Thank you for the flowers, they're gorgeous." She pecked him on the cheek once, before going to find a vase for the flowers.
She walked back down the hall towards the kitchen, and he followed behind her. "So what was you ex doing here?"
"What?" She pretended no to hear him, as she put the roses in a vase.
"Your ex, Fitz. What was he doing here? It's a little too early for visits isn't it?"
"Oh, he wasn't really visiting me. He just came over to borrow some eggs."
"He lives in this neighborhood?"
"No, his sister does. She's fixing breakfast and needed eggs." Olivia moved around the kitchen, doing anything to keep her attention from him. She started picking up her plate from the table. Dumping the uneaten food in the trash before putting the plate in the dish washer. Blair watched her as she moved around. He noticed that she looked uneasy and nervous. She was moving around at the speed of light, avoiding eye contact with him at all cost.
He watched as she put the juice pitcher back into the fridge, and something on the door caught his attention. It was a picture and the only picture on the fridge, since Olivia didn't like things on her fridge. She only had it there, until she could find somewhere else to put it.
Blair pulled the pictures of Olivia, Fitz and Isabelle down off the fridge. It was the pictures they took at the birthday party in the photo booth. He noticed that Olivia looked as if she was sitting on his lap. He felt his jealousy bloom instantly.
"What's this?"
Olivia turned around, to see him holding the birthday pictures up. She reached out and took it, putting it back on the fridge before she answered him. "That was from Bella's party. She wanted to take a picture with us in the photo booth.
"You're sitting on his lap." Blair pointed out the obvious.
Olivia shrugged. "It was a tight fit. That was the only way we could all get in the booth." She had her back turned to him scrubbing the counter top, so she couldn't see his reaction. She didn't turn back around, until after a few moments of silence and she could feel him staring at her. "What?" She asked.
"What's going on between you two?"
"Excuse me?"
"You and you're ex. You planning on getting back together or something?"
"Why would you ask me that?"
"I don't know. It's just, every time I see you two together, you're always alone. Talking and laughing. He's always looking at you like- like…" Blair couldn't find his words, so he pointed to one of the pictures on the fridge. Olivia and Bella were both looking at the camera smiling, while Fitz was staring at Olivia. The look in his eyes was one that no one could miss. "Like that, like he still has something for you. Which, I can't really blame him for. You two were married, so I guess you'll always feel something for each other. But I need to know that it's in the past, that you don't plan on rekindling things with him. I need to know before- I just need to know."
Olivia put her scrub sponge on the counter and walked to him. She wrapped her arms loosely around his neck and kissed him softly. "You're right. We were married, and I will always feel something special for him. But that is the past and I don't plan on rekindling it anytime soon." She kissed his lips quickly again, giving him a small smile.
It seemed to do the trick. "Good. So I guess you don't want to get breakfast, since you've already eaten. I probably should've called first. I didn't have any morning classes today and remember you saying you weren't going in to work today, so I just thought we could spend the morning together."
"Well we still can. I'm expected a phone call today for a meeting, but we can just chill until then." Olivia was feeling guilty about what she and Fitz had just done. They had only kissed, but she felt that was just as bad as having sex with him. Right now she would give Blair anything he wanted, to clear her conscious.
X
"Good afternoon Mr. Grant." The receptionist at Fitz's job greeted Fitz with a warm smile, and Fitz tried to reciprocate. "Here's your mail and you have a few messages." Lauren gave him a small stack of papers. "Also you're twelve thirty called to reschedule. So you're free for the next hour."
"Thank you Lauren." Fitz was going over the sticky notes that Lauren had written his messages on. He was throwing the unimportant ones away in the waste basket, when Stephen came up beside him.
"Good morning Mr. Finch." Lauren greeted him with the same smile she gave Fitz. She handed him his mail, and the two men walked away from the desk.
"What's different about you today?" Stephen asked, noticing Fitz's sullen mood. His shoulders were slumped, he was dragging his feet as he walked, and he had this scared expression on his face.
"What do you mean?" Fitz asked, looking straight ahead. Not being his normally upbeat and happy mood.
"You look like someone died. What's wrong man?" Stephen asked, honestly concerned about his friend.
Fitz stopped walking for a moment, he nodded in the direction of his office. Stephen got the hint, and changed his steps to Fitz's office instead of his own. Fitz walked in first, sitting behind his desk, while Stephen sat in a chair in front of it. "I did something this mornings."
"Okay… something bad?"
"I don't know yet. And I, I don't know if it was a mistake or not. When it happened, I felt good, I felt high. But now, I've been sitting in my apartment alone, and thinking about it, and I think it might've been a mistake."
"Well what did you do?"
"I kissed Olivia this morning." Fitz confessed.
"What? I really wasn't expecting that. How exactly did this come about? Last time I checked, Olivia couldn't stand you." Fitz went on to tell Stephen all about this morning and what he said to Olivia, which led to him kissing her. "You said that to her?"
"Yeah, and a little bit more."
"What'd she say? How'd she react?"
"She was just as confused as I was when I said it. It was like I was having an outer body experience or something. I could hear the words, but I couldn't confirm that it was my voice."
"Did you mean it?"
Fitz thought for a moment, before nodding his head yes. "I've been feeling this way for some time now, but I never acted on it. Before the wedding rehearsal, Olivia had avoided being in my life as best she could. So I didn't have time to confront my feelings. But in the short time that we've reconnected…" Fitz sighed running his hand over his face. "I feel like a woman talking to her girlfriend." Fitz said, making Stephen laugh out loud, before he sobered up.
"Listen man, I'm shocked but not that shocked. I mean anyone with eyes can see you still have some feelings for Olivia. Personally I always thought you two would get back together. I was actually rooting for you two. But all I'll say, is that you need to be careful. You need to make sure this is what you want before you further act on it."
X
It was one o'clock on the dot, and Olivia was just pulling up a fairly small apartment complex. About an hour ago, Ms. Hannigan called to relocate her meeting with Jazmine. It was originally supposed to be at the adoption agency, but Ms. Hannigan moved it to the girls' home instead.
The entire time Olivia was getting dressed, her nerves were on overdrive. She was nervous and excited. She was worrying about saying the right things and making Jazmine like her, without trying too hard for her approval. She changed her outfit four times, trying to find the right thing. She didn't want to be too business serious, and she didn't want to be too Friday night sexy either. And to be honest, most of her clothes were a little too Friday night sexy. She settled on an all black wrap dress. It was quarter length sleeved, and it stopped just above her knees. It clung to her body up top, and was slightly loose fitting around her hips. It was sexy, but not overly sexy. She paired it with simple black pumps, diamond stud earrings, and her black and white hound's-tooth thin coat. It wasn't cold outside, but there was a chilled breeze.
Olivia walked up the one flight upstairs to the second floor. She looked down at the piece of paper in her hand to double check the apartment number. When she found the door, she knocked, and waited for what felt like an hour, before the door opened revealing an older woman. She looked to be in her late fifties early sixties. She had on a cotton, floral, zip-up night gown and pink slippers. Her salt and pepper hair was held back in a single braid resting on her back.
Olivia could tell by the look on the woman's face that she had no idea who she was, or why she was standing on her doorstep. Olivia cleared her throat and smiled politely at the woman.
"Hello. My name is Olivia, Olivia Pope. I'm supposed to be meeting Jazmine Foresmith at this address." The woman just stared at Olivia with a blank face. "Foresmith, Jazmine Foresmith. Does she live here?" Olivia got a smile this time, but she highly doubted that the woman understood her. She was hesitant to follow, when the woman grabbed her arm and ushered her into the house. When she walked in, she heard voices coming from the other room, and relaxed when she recognized one of them as Ms. Hannigan.
The woman had left Olivia behind, going down a different hallway. Liv followed the sound of the voices, until she got to what she assumed was the living room or den. Ms. Hannigan and Jazmine were both sitting on the couch drinking pink lemonade and chatting. Ms. Hannigan saw Olivia first, since she was seated that way. Jazmine was facing her, with her back to the door.
"Olivia you made it." Ms. Hannigan stood up to greet her.
"Of course." Liv replied. "Your grandmother, I believe, let me in." She said to Jazmine.
"Well I would like for you to meet someone. This Is Jazmine, Jazmine this is the Olivia I was talking about." Ms. Hannigan introduced the two, and helped Jazmine up off the couch.
"Hi, nice to meet you." Jazmine held out her hand for Olivia to shake. She looked different than from her pictures Olivia saw. She looked much younger, and Olivia had to remind herself that this was just a child. She was a teenager, still in high school. She shouldn't be meeting with potential mothers to adopt her baby. She should be thinking about college and hanging out with her friends. But Liv also had to remind herself, that not everyone's reality is the same.
"Thanks so much for meeting me here. I know we were supposed to meet at Ms. Hannigan's office, but I was put on bed rest for a week. My blood pressure spiked like way up, I guess was doing too much." Jazmine slowly sat back down on the couch, and Olivia sat in the single chair across form her. Ms. Hannigan had gone off somewhere, to give them privacy to talk. "Do you want something to drink? All we really have is Kool-Aid and tap water though."
"No thank you, I'm fine." Olivia declined. She needed something stronger than Kool-Aid. As many times as she had met with expecting mothers, it never got any easier for her. No matter the woman's age.
"So I guess I should start. Well you already know my name is Jazmine. I'm seventeen, senior in high school. I'm actually graduating this year, and I'll be going to UCLA next spring. Um, there's not really much else I can think of. Other than the basketball under my shirt."
"It's okay."
"You wanna know how I got in this situation don't you? How I got pregnant."
"You don't have to tell me, if you don't want to. I don't wanna make you uncomfortable."
"No, it's okay. I've told this story like a bazillion times. If I can survive telling my parents, I can survive telling anyone." Jazmine brought her legs up on the couch, folding them Indian style. Olivia was shocked to see she could still do that, with her belly siting in her lap. "Well it happened when I went with a few of my friends on a road trip. We were driving to UCLA for the weekend to tour the campus. Everything was fine, until our last night there. A frat house was having this huge party, insanity everywhere, and of course we couldn't not go. But anyway, we went and for lack of a better word, I got drunk. Like sloppy, can't walk, can't stand up straight, tongue down everyone's throat drunk. I had never drank that much before, I really don't know what came over me. I don't really remember everything that happened that night. But I do remember going upstairs to someone's room, I can't even remember his name. Though I highly doubt that he told me anyway." Jazmine put her head down slightly in embarrassment.
"So anyway, the next morning, my friends and I left. And about six weeks later, I found out I was pregnant. I hadn't been feeling like myself for weeks before, and after days and days of waking up with my head in the toilet, I took a pregnancy test. And here we are."
"How did your parents take it?"
"Um, I'm living here with my grandmother now. So that should pretty much tell you how they took it." Jazmine chuckled. "It's safe to say they didn't take it well. One of the first things they asked me was did he force me. And of course I told them no, that he was just as drunk as I was; if not more. The look… the look on their faces when I told them I wasn't forced. They were disappointed that I hadn't been raped." Jazmine shook her head, and let out a humorless laugh.
"I don't think-"
"No really, they were. If I had been raped, if I had been forced against my will into this situation. Into getting pregnant, then they could have dealt with that. They would have had to, because it wasn't my fault, it wasn't decision. But because it was my own stupid decision, they can put all the blame on me. They don't have to deal with it, and they didn't. I made one mistake and they turned their backs on me. My dad threw me out on my ass on the front porch. The neighbors watched as I cried on the ground, while he dropped a handful of clothes by my feet. It was the only things he let me take with me. My mom just stood and watch him, she didn't try to help me once. If it wasn't for my grandmother, I don't know where I would've gone."
"I'm sorry. That… that should have never happened to you." Olivia couldn't believe what Jazmine's parents did to her. Liv could never imagine her parents ever treating her that way. "Have you spoke to your parents since?"
"Nope." Jazmine shrugged, adding extra emphasis on the 'P'. "I called them for like three weeks straight after. But they eventually changed their number and I haven't tried to call or see them since."
"What about the baby's father?"
"I have no idea where he is. I tried to find him a few months back. I was originally going to get an abortion, but I couldn't go through with it. I don't want the kid, but I couldn't kill it either. I made like four different appointments and at the last minute I would walk out. So after I decided to not abort it, I went back to UCLA to find the guy. But all I had was a small memory of what he looked like and the frat house where the party was. I described the guy to everyone at the house, but no one knew who he was. Turns out he wasn't a part of that fraternity, maybe didn't even go to the school. The point is he's gone. So you don't have to worry, he's not gonna come back and try to get the kid."
"I didn't mean-"
"No, you did. But it's okay. I would want to know too, if I were you."
"Why did you decide to give the baby up for adoption?"
Jazmine let out a huff, before answering. "Because I'm a kid myself. I don't know what to do with a baby, I've never even held one before. I'm not supposed to have to deal with this right now. I'm only seventeen, I should be thinking about college and going to the mall with my friends. Instead, I'm living with my sick grandmother, working one job to help her pay the bills because her disability only does so much. And working a second job to pay for college, because financial aid doesn't cover everything. My grandma's eighty-two, with a bad hip, and most days she doesn't even know where she is. I can't take care of her and a baby." Jazmine paused and rubbed some soothing circles on her belly. "And I also know that I could never give this baby a life it deserves. If I give it up, then maybe it'll have a chance. Maybe if I'm not there to influence it, it won't become such a disappointment like me."
"You're not a disappointment Jazmine."
Jazmine laughed again, "Yeah tell that to my parents."
Olivia watched to broken look on her face, and it was breaking her heart. She was only a child and she had been through so much in the last year of her life, than Olivia had in her lifetime. Olivia was blessed to have never had a hard day in her life. Her parents always made sure she and her siblings had the best and never wanted for anything.
"Well now that I've put a damper on things. Why don't you tell me about you."
Olivia went on to tell Jazmine about her job and her family. Her dad was originally from California, but his previous job caused him to travel quite often. It was during one of his business trips to North Carolina that he met Olivia's mother, Adelle. She was an up and coming writer, from Charlotte. The two hit it off, and Curtis stayed in North Carolina. They dated for two years, before they had their first child, Althea. Two years later they had a second child, Curtis Jr. And one year after he was born, they had their third and last child Olivia.
Curtis and Adelle had been dating and living together for almost six years, before they decided to get married, neither of them in a big rush. It wasn't until Olivia was eight that Curtis's mother had fallen ill and was given a terminal diagnosis. Wanting to be closer to his mother in her last few months, Curtis and Althea moved the family to California. Althea continued her writing career, and eventually became very successful. And Curtis took over his father's winery business.
"So what do you do for a living?"
"I'm a psychiatrist."
Jazmine barely stifled her laugh. "Really?"
"Yeah. I know it's not the most glamorous job out there, but it is interesting. I took a bunch of psychology classes in high school and loved it. So when I got to college I majored in psychology with a minor in biology. Then I went to med school, and got my medical license and became a psychiatrist."
"So why do you want to adopt a baby?" Jazmine asked, changing the subject. "You look like you're still young. I'm sure you could have a kid of your own. Most of the women who meet with me are like old and in their forties."
Since when was forty old? Olivia said to herself, not that she was forty. "I uh, I was married before, and we did try to have a biological child. But I wasn't- I'm not able to carry a child full term."
"Oh." Jazmine felt bad now for bringing it up, and in poor taste. "Sorry."
"It's okay."
"Have you tried adoption before?"
"Yes, but I was turned down. They said that I worked too much, and it didn't help that I was a single woman. As if, there aren't plenty of successful single mothers in the world."
"Why'd you and your husband split?"
"He wanted kids of his own."
"Seems like an asshole."
"Yeah. He wasn't when I married him, he kind of just grew into an asshole."
Jazmine chuckled, "I like you. You're cool. Most of the women I met with before are all stuffy, and boring. You're not at all like I thought you would be. When I first saw you, looking all fancy and polished, I thought you were gonna be a real bore."
This time, Olivia laughed. "I'm sorry to disappoint."
"So what were you hoping for a girl or a boy?" Olivia was about to answer, when Jazmine cut her off. "And please don't give me the generic 'I just want a healthy baby.'"
"I want a girl." Olivia answered without hesitation. "When I was with my husband, I wanted a boy, mainly because that's what he wanted. Not saying I wouldn't love my son, but I do want a girl first."
"I wish I could tell you it was a girl, but I don't know yet. I didn't want the sex to be revealed, until I knew who was gonna adopt the baby. I thought it might be more special that way. After we get to know each other a little better, maybe you can come to an ultrasound with me."
"I would love that."
They spent the next forty minutes just talking getting to know one another, with Jazmine asking most of the questions. She asked about her family life, what her friends were like, basically anyone who would ever come in contact with the baby. When they were just about to wrap things up, Jazmine asked if she could tag along when Ms. Hannigan made her home visit. Olivia had no problem with it, and the two exchanged numbers to keep in contact, before their next meeting.
Ms. Hannigan set up a date and time for her to do a home visit at Olivia's, and they all said their goodbyes. Olivia walked out the home feeling a lot better than when she first arrived. She was so nervous before, but now she just thought she was being silly. She had nothing to worry about or be nervous about. She and Jazmine hit it off really well, and she was hopeful that Jazmine would think she was the right person to adopt her baby.
No if only she could get her latest conversation with Fitz and the memory of his kiss out her head, she'd be having a good day.
(^_^)