Deeks hummed to himself as he bent down to tie his shoes, intending to go for a run. In the last week, he'd had little time for exercising, or anything else, outside of work, and he was looking forward to the mental and physical release. Even if his legs would ache a little more than usual.

When he looked up, he saw Rosa hesitating just outside the door, concern in her dark, expressive eyes.

"Hey, what's up?" he asked, hopping to his feet with only a slight cracking of his knees. She hesitated, fingers tapping against the doorframe. That was unusual at this point. Although still naturally quiet, Rosa had opened up a lot since first moving in.

"Um, I keep thinking about what happened the other day. At the restaurant," she clarified.

"Oh, yeah, that." He sucked in a breath between his teeth. He'd known there would be questions eventually but been so focused on getting through that awful case that he didn't really think about how the incident effected Rosa. "I'm sorry you had to see that."

"Marty, you don't have to apologize to me," she said quickly, breaking away from the door finally. "I was scared for you, yes, but I do not blame you for it." She inclined her head. "I do have questions though."

Sitting on the couch, he gestured for her to join him. She curled up on the other cushion, hugging her knees to her chest.

"Ask anything you want," Deeks offered, settling his hands loosely between his legs.

"I know you had a panic attack," Rosa began slowly. "Or something like that." She flashed Deeks a shy, almost sheepish look. "I did some research recently. But what caused it?"

A part of him wanted to water it down, make it more palatable, but Rosa wasn't frail, and she hated being patronized.

"Several years ago," he began in a matter-of-fact tone, "I was captured along with Sam while undercover by some Russian arms dealers. They were trying to break us so they…tortured us."

"Dios mío!" Rosa said in a hushed voice. "What did they do to you?"

"They, uh, used a drill on my mouth and…other things to try to get me to talk." A few days ago, he wasn't sure he would have been able to talk about the topic at all, what with the flashbacks fresh in his mind. Still, it made his skin prickle in a way he hadn't felt in several years up until now. "I'm not going to go into detail, but by the time I was rescued, there was a lot of damage, physical and psychological. I needed surgery and a lot more that I didn't really address at the time."

He chanced a glance at Rosa; she had her hands clamped tightly together, a horrified look in her eyes.

"Anyway, I had a lot of flashbacks, nightmares, and other symptoms for a long time after that," Deeks finished.

"How long ago did this happen?"

"About 9 years ago."

Rosa made a choked noise, shaking her head in apparent dismay.

"And you still have these flashbacks now?"

"No," Deeks assured her quickly. "It's much better now, but that case I was helping LAPD with brought back a lot of unpleasant memories. There were some pictures that looked similar to the ones they took of me. It made it seem like I was tied up and being hurt again." He let out an involuntary shudder.

"Marty, I am so sorry," Rosa said, crossing over the midline of the cushions to hug him. Her smaller arms squeezed him tightly and Deeks was surprised by how comforting it was. When she released him, she covered his hands with hers, compassion and empathy in her eyes.

"Sometimes I dream about the people, that woman, who tried to kill me and Kensi. But the therapy has helped, and it has never been like what you describe."

Almost as soon as Rosa was settled, they'd found a trauma therapist for Rosa to help deal with everything she'd experienced. They wanted to make sure she had a much healthier way of dealing with her pain and mental health than them.

"Good," Deeks said. "I never want you to feel like that. Ever. And if it ever gets worse than nightmares, you need to tell us right away."

Rosa nodded seriously. "I will." Her thumb twitched slightly in his hand, and she lifted one shoulder. "I'm sorry that I did not do anything to help at the restaurant," she continued. "I wanted to but I, I felt like I couldn't move and didn't know what to do. Then Kensi was there, and she knew exactly what to say and…I felt so useless."

"Rosa, it's not your responsibility to take care of me. You shouldn't have even had to witness that." A small amount of bitterness, mixed with that old shame that kept him quiet so many years ago, welled up.

"Why?" Rosa asked, sounding astonished. "It is a part of you and not something to be embarrassed for. Or blamed." Deeks swallowed against an unexpected tightening in his throat. The depth of her compassion and understanding was astounding and threatened to undo him. He hadn't talked like this with really with anyone besides Kensi.

"I guess I'm still so used to hiding that part of myself from most people that it's hard to break," he explained softly. "With the kind of work we do, and the way I grew up, showing weakness and pain, was kind of frowned upon. I was afraid of losing my job and everything else when this happened," he unconsciously gestured to his jaw. "so I forced myself to be ok and hid when it wasn't. It's hard to break a habit like that."

"Well, you don't need to hide it from me," she declared, leaving no room for argument. Deeks chuckled softly, impressed once again by her strength and persistence. "So, what should I do if something like that happens again?"

"Uh, talk quietly, remind me that it's not actually happening. Touch is usually grounding. Sometimes none of that works and it's best to get me somewhere quiet and just wait it out." He sighed, ruffling his hair. "I honestly never thought I'd be discussing this with my kid. I hope you never have a reason to use any of those strategies."

"I hope so too." She squeezed his hand again, fingers strong and firm. "But if there is one thing I learned from you and Kensi, it is that we take care of one another in this family. So if the time comes, I will take care of you too," Rosa told him and by the time she finished there were tears in both of their eyes.

"Ok, definitely gonna need another hug after that," Deeks murmured and Rosa wrapped her arms around him, settling her chin in the crook of his neck.