Splatoon: The Brothers and the Others
Octo-Bunk Buddies
Octolings, Octocopters, and Octotroopers alike clustered about the Octarian HQ's rec room, jamming into already crowded booths and tables, some squabbling among themselves. DJ Octavio, garbed in his samurai helm as always, stood in front of all of them. In his giant robot turntable mech of course. Octavio attempted to clear his throat, so he raised his tentacle in front of his mouth as if to absorb his coughs.
On the "surface" of Octo Valley, a robot fist erupted from the earth, startling birds and Cap'n Cuttlefish, both of whom fled from the scene as fast as they could.
To say that no one could take their eyes off of the glaring robot fist in the ceiling was an understatement. Shrapnel fell off the ceiling as if they were icicles in spring. Except less cold, equally as sharp. The Octarians, despite the accidental destruction of their own base, looked to Octavio, eager to continue listening.
"Er, right, well, moving on-" Octavio grunted, ripping his robot fist out of the top, light streaming in.
The only sound, aside from the scraping of metal and the bouncing of a certain Zapfish in the back of the room, were coughs from the Octarians.
Octavio sighed. "I'm sure you are all very aware that at this point, we haven't made a move on reclaiming our surface lands."
Murmuring and bickering ensued among the crowd, a few Octolings going as far as to reach for their holstered Octoshots. DJ Octavio glared at the crowd, quickly spinning on one of his turntable's records, sending a scratching noise throughout the crowd.
"Calm down! Look, I know that it's not a great lifestyle. But that's what I've come to you all today to ask of you. As you know, our military might has been scratched up, and with a lack of aggression between us and the Inklings, we can only put our technologies to another use…" DJ Octavio cleared his throat. "Expansion."
The octopi in the room calmed down, staring ahead with interest.
"The rock formations are ripe for potential new housing, kettles by the dozen can be set up with the right technology. You are all aware of the new Skell machine that we've constructed with reference from an old Sunken Sea Scroll of years past, right?" Octavio asked the crowd.
Several Octolings and Octotroopers in the crowd rubbed bruises and scars instinctively, grumbling to themselves.
"With the very same technology based on the blueprints of the Skell we salvaged, I believe we have the ability to expand our underground empire twofold." Octavio spoke calmly. "It's a plan that will take up a lot of down time to finish. But with your support, I believe that we have the capability to make Octo Valley even fresher than Inkopolis above. Who's with me?"
For a moment, Octavio mentally braced himself; the Octolings around here were generally temperamental when it came to touchy subjects such as expansion. However, the octopi soldiers seemed generally pleased with this idea, some clapping at the prospect of expansion. Octavio smiled, wiping his octopus brow using one of his tentacles, his mech mirroring his hand movement.
"...Is that it? Seriously?!" A voice called out from the crowd.
DJ Octavio sighed, closing his eyes. "T-41?"
A small octopus jetted out of the crowd, Super Jumped in front of Octavio, and grabbed Octavio by his collar. Technically his octopus skin, but in a way that would suggest she's infuriated and is giving the octopus a stern, classic human talking to.
"Out of all of the stupid things you could've discussed, you did nothing to help us, or me, for that matter." Tai spoke through gritted teeth.
"...What's wrong now?" Octavio asked.
"Do you recall a certain robot tearing through the hall where the Octoling bunks were at?" Tai asked.
Octavio nodded. "Yes, the repair crew is working on it. What's your point?"
"The repair crew has off today. Most of the rooms were fixed." Tai told him, still steaming.
"...I don't see the problem." Octavio admitted.
"Clam right you don't! My bunk is the only one that still hasn't been fixed yet!" Tai shouted.
"...Oh." Octavio muttered. "Well, T-41-"
"Enough with the codename bullshrimp, everyone already knows everyone here. What's the point?" Tai asked.
The octopi in the crowd nodded and murmured in agreement. DJ Octavio rolled his eyes.
"Tai. If they're off today, then you'll just have to wait until-"
A loud smack resonated throughout the base. Octavio's eyes were wide open, as was Tai's palm. A scorching red mark in the shape of a hand was left on Octavio's face. The crowd mirrored their leader, everyone staring with wide eyes, or in the case of the one-eyed Octoball, eye.
"...Uh, yeah, yeah, well I think we can work something out." Octavio muttered, rubbing his cheek. Octavio cleared his throat, looking towards the crowd. "As you can see, T-4- Tai is in need of a place to stay. Any volunteers."
The room went silent. Even Shockwhisk, the bouncing Zapfish in the back who powered the Octarian base, began filing out of the room with tremendous speed, some pushing past ceiling debris, desperate to escape, leaving only a handful of Octarians at a table, two Octolings and an Octocopter.
"Hey, you know, I think it's lunchtime!" The Octocopter reminded himself, flying off.
"J3r-ry, get back here!" One of the Octolings shouted.
"Aussie, Chi, we already have a lot on our plate, so do us all a favor and have Tai rest in one of your bunks for the time being." Octavio told the two of them.
"...Uh." Aussie muttered.
Chi seemed blush at the prospect. Octavio sighed, pinching the bridge of his "nose" with his hands. Octavio squawked, removing his large robot hand from his face, taking his tentacles and rubbing the self-inflicted wound.
"Just- Just decide between you two- Ow. I have to get an ice pack and check on the Skell." Octavio said, waving them off.
As Octavio hovered off and out of the room, Aussie and Chi glared at each other. Tai sat on the stage Octavio had previously hovered over, blowing her head tentacles up boredly.
"You take her." Chi pleaded.
"C-H1, you know very well that I'm not going to bunk with that she-devil." Aussie frowned, the lights in her Octoling Goggles flashing menacingly.
"What?! She's your friend Aussie, c'mon! Besides, I still haven't...cleaned my room since I...uh, left the HQ." Chi stammered.
Aussie scoffed. "Is that so? I will NOT tolerate T-41's annoying habits."
"What 'habits'?" Chi pried.
With every single slam against the wall Tai made, Aussie slowly and slowly lost her sanity. Gripping her pillow, Aussie could only shove her head into the pillow, screaming in increased discomfort with every slam.
Aussie gazed horrified off into the distance, then shook her head as to clear her mind. "Regardless, I am not going to let her keep me up all night with her incessant racket!"
"Aussie, really, how annoying is slamming a blob of ink on the wall? It's a basic sport." Chi told her with a shrug.
"Okay, YOU take her in then." Aussie demanded.
Chi backed away, her chair scraping against the metal with a harsh sound. "Are you kidding?! Not after last time, no!"
Tai and Chi were gearing up in Chi's bunk, clothing themselves and grabbing their weapons, Tai draping her Octoling Goggles around her neck boredly. An alarm sounded out through the base, blaring. Chi was actually just leaving her bed, covering herself as best as she could using her bedsheets, stumbling over a blanket and pillow left on the ground.
"Let's get going, rook, Aussie's waiting." Tai told Chi. "Thanks for letting me stay the night too, she can be a real pain in the butt sometimes."
"Right, right." Chi muttered, fumbling for her clothes.
"By the way, thanks in advance for letting me borrow your clean underwear." Tai muttered, strapping an Ink Tank to her back, the clear canister filling up with a fuchsia ink.
"Wait a minute, what?!" Chi asked.
The swift opening and closing of an automatic door freaked Chi out. Staring at the ground, the only clothing left was her Octoling Armor, boots and goggles included. Chi felt at her abdomen, feeling nothing but bare skin.
"TAAAAAAAAIIIIII!" Chi screamed, Tai giggling like a madwoman as she hopped through the halls of the headquarters in squid form.
As if electricity bounced in between them, the tension between Aussie and Chi intensified. Both were glaring bullets at each other, Tai boredly sitting by with a random tub of popcorn.
"Wat sum?" She offered some to the air.
As if by pure magic, the popcorn vanished, only replaced by the sound of chewing.
Thanks.
Tai nodded, staring at the tense scene, Aussie and Chi standing up from the chairs, the chairs screeching lightly as they were pushed back. The two of them reached at their hips, pulling their Octoshots out.
"You know, it doesn't have to come to this Aussie." Chi narrowed her eyes.
"I agree. So long as you drag Tai to your room." Aussie spat in retaliation.
"Nevermind, it totally does have to come to this." Chi spoke silently, raising her Octoshot to Aussie's face, blasting her back with a spray of ink.
Aussie flew back into a set of tables, scattering chairs across the floor. Aussie snarled, wiping the ink off of her face, sending back an attack of her own, shooting towards Chi. Chi gasped, then knocked over a table, taking cover behind it. Ink bounced off of the nearly spotless top, Chi sending a barrage of bombs towards Aussie. As the Splat Bombs neared Aussie, she switched to an octopus, hitting the deck, until the sound of clicking caught her attention. She turned towards the bombs, which were spitting out ink harmlessly. Aussie's eye twitched.
"I can't believe you fell for the decoy AGAIN!" Chi laughed.
Aussie growled, tossing back the decoy bombs towards Chi's location, who simply giggled. Upon closer inspection however, Chi realized that there was one more bomb than the amount she had thrown. The extra bomb blew up, dousing Chi in ink, Aussie smirking. The smirk was switched out with a surprised expression when Chi tackled her in octopus form, the two Octolings brawling on the floor, kicking up ink and chairs.
A clapping noise sounded out. Aussie and Chi stopped themselves, their tentacles balled up into fists just moments before slamming into each other's faces. Tai was clapping, slowly and somewhat sarcastically, breaking into a yawn.
"That was fun… Thanks for fighting over me guys. You must really care a lot." Tai smiled.
"...Uh." The both of them stuttered.
"Well, now that this is over, I'm going to go over to Splin and Sharq's house to take a nap. See you later." Tai said, placing the popcorn on the floor, walking away, leaving the room.
The two Octolings on the floor watched her leave. As soon as she was out of sight, Tai popped back into view, her head sticking out of the empty doorway.
"Oh, and by the way, this is probably late, but the Inklings have this awesome holiday. It's called 'April Flippers', and you can mess around with people all you want and not get in trouble for it." Tai grinned. "Just thought I'd let you know, see ya."
Tai left the room again, leaving the Octolings even more dumbfounded before. The confusion was replaced with rage soon enough.
"TAI, YOU-"
AN: For language censorship (and the fact that I'm a lazy scumbag) we're going to end this chapter here.
Thanks Dread Angel, Ultrapyre, and write n wrong for reviewing! I don't either Dread. Ultrapyre, I can understand that aversion to pranks, wasn't too fond of them when I was little, and still have problems with it today. write n wrong, I'm sure that those headaches are probably more gracious than going out to hunt one of those Rathalos, wouldn't it?
Well, with that out of the way, thanks for reading everybody, this is ThePizzaLovingTurtle, off to scrounge money up for Conquest and Revelations, see ya.