Splatoon: The Brothers and the Others
Aren't We Lazy?
As she made her way through the pipe, entering the Inkling world, the first thing she noticed, the light, shocked her as it reached her eyes through her goggles. Sure, she had plenty of light down in Octo Valley, but this light was different. It just felt different, more clean, crisp, and bright than when she served under the Octarian regime. Her mouth gaped at all of the colors of the flashing billboards and signs, as well as the buildings. The Booyah Base looked like a glimmering haven to her. In spite of all of this glory, her first instinct-
"Hrrruuugh!" She turned behind her, emptying the contents of her stomach by a vending machine.
Yep, just that. It was hardly that she was disgusted or petrified as a result of the beauty of Inkopolis, but pure fear. Fear that passed down from tentacle to tentacle as a result of oppression and war. As utopian this place appeared, Aussie was afraid. She had trained for a few years, but had risen to the top of her leagues and ranks in the army.
"...Y-Yes, exactly!" Aussie spoke up, swallowing what saliva was not tainted by her episode, "I'm the commander. I shall find assistance from our Inkling benefactors."
Upon saying just that, Aussie attempted to climb out of the manhole, only to gag yet again, but not as a result of a stomach movement. She shifted into an octopus, diving to the side, narrowly avoiding a group of cheery Inklings walking off from an Inkopolis Tower escapade. She grit her teeth, sliding through the plaza, sticking to walls closely in an attempt to sneak using the shadows. Passing by a small coffee brewing store's glass window, she switched back into an Octoling, tiptoeing as she made her way out of the plaza.
"Hey, you."
She raised her fists immediately, glaring in the direction of the voice. She stopped, a street urchin, his bony arms raised above his head, tossing an Inkling over by a tall barrier he sat by.
"One day Spyke!" The Inkling shouted as he was tossed, "One day I'll have my refund!"
"That'll be the day when snails fly." Spyke commented with a sneer, dusting himself off. "Sorry 'bout that, bloke's been harassing me for days now. How can I be of service, love?"
Aussie could not say a word. She had forgotten about other species. It felt like forever since she last saw something that had no tentacles of any shape or form. So to say that Spyke looked extremely alien to her would actually be on point. She coughed.
"Apologies for staring."
"No apologies needed. Not often that an Octoling comes about to visit. What's your business?" Spyke inquired with a sharp eye.
"I need your assistance in locating a pair of squids." She started, clearing her throat somewhat..
"Any in particular?" Spyke asked, sitting down on a mat, a collection of Super Sea Snail shells piled up by his side, "Quite a few. Squid Sisters maybe?"
Aussie scowled at the stage names. "Agent 1 and 2." Clearing her throat yet again, she stood up straight and dignified, "A pair of brothers."
Spyke blinked. "Blue tentacles? Always walking about, causin' trouble?"
"...Yes." She muttered slowly.
Spyke shrugged. "Can't say I'd know where they'd live. Ain't my place to be sticking my head into others' business."
Aussie cursed silently, staring to the side. Another vending machine. Why the Inklings constructed multiple machines dedicated to quenching thirst around eluded her, but regardless, she was at a standstill. She thought of another question:
"Can you fight?" She asked, clearing her throat.
"Heh." Spyke smirked.
Immediately, Aussie regretted her question. The gaze Spyke gave off was nothing short of menacing despite one of his eyes being covered by his sharp head. Then he shrugged.
"Nope." He answered plainly.
She stared at the ground in defeat. Tai was off trying to rescue Chi from a malfunctional machine and here she was asking a street urchin pointless questions in the home of the enemy. She quickly decided she would treat herself someday. But for the time being, she decided that she would have to make do with the intel she had.
Adjusting her armor, she walked off. "Thanks anyways."
"Hold it there, miss."
Aussie turned around. Spyke was pointing at the plaza.
"Would he be the one you're searching for?" Spyke asked.
Aussie blinked. Swiveling back around, she noticed a familiar blue Inkling in a Takoroka brand-name cap, just switched into a squid. She began to call out his name, his codename that is, then froze as she reached for the first word. That would jeopardize her position, revealing Octarians to the unsuspecting world. There would be chaos. So she waited, watching Sharq, her goggles glowing. Sharq jet off into the air with a burst of blue. Blinking, she tracked Sharq, then swiftly departed, Spyke giving a lazy wave as he sat. Still attempting to remain incognito, she ventured out of the shadows briefly, staring up into the sky. Spiralling away, Sharq was a blue bullet in the sky, vanishing into the sky as a speck. For Aussie, this was not a problem. Her goggles made up the distance, a zoom that of a pair of binoculars. She observed Sharq, finding him landing by a house on the hills. She nodded, a vague memory tingling at the back of her head. She turned back to Spyke.
"What are you waiting for? Longer you stand around, longer you get exposed. That's just my theory anyways." Spyke spoke, still staring at Aussie from his alley.
Aussie frowned. "Blunt and straightforward." She switched to a smile, "Probably would've been great in the army."
"Eh." Spyke shrugged.
Aussie turned back towards the open space leading towards the hills, being careful not to accidentally reveal herself. Ducking behind a pillar, she stared at the plaza, then to the hills. No Inkling in sight so far. She felt her legs move. She felt the breeze pick up. Subconsciously running, she snapped into reality, switching into an octopus, leaping forward into the sky overhead.
Sharq hummed to himself as he stared down at his Gamepad, Splin snoozing peacefully in his bed. Pressing each button in a steady rhythm, he glanced up and down in the same rhythmical fashion, Gamepad, television, Gamepad, television.
"...Sharq." Splin muttered.
"Yeah?" Sharq asked, turning back.
"If you're playing the new Star Squid Zero without me…" Splin began.
"Um." Sharq stared back at the television.
The blue and white ship he piloted onscreen transformed into a squid. Sharq gulped, managing an innocent smile.
"Nah, I'm just uh… Watching the news." Sharq told him.
"Of course you are." Splin sighed, laying his head on his pillow, "Try not to finish the game without me."
"...Okay." Sharq nodded, staring back at the screen.
Sharq continued playing while Splin continued sleeping. Ann-Gel, being her dainty trophy self, hummed as she walked, with a different air to her. Sharq's eyes gravitated to the left, catching a glimpse of the green Inkling statuette, then turned back to the game. He switched back, gawking at Ann-Gel in surprise.
"Whoa! When'd you change your tentacles?" Sharq asked.
Ann-Gel shrugged. Instead of her usual orange tentacles and apparel, her tentacles were dyed a green now, her shirt switched out with a black counterpart of her normal tee, donning a pair of Black Trainers on her feet.
"I dunno really. I kinda woke up like this." Ann-Gel told Sharq, stretching her arms.
Sharq nodded. A rustling of sheets caught their attention. Turning to the side, Maria in her own lime-green squid appearance stared at them, nodding at Ann-Gel's shift in palette.
"You look nice." Maria commented with a wave.
"Thanks." Ann-Gel smiled, flaunting her equally lime tentacles. Then she paused, staring suspiciously at Maria.
Maria laughed, caressing her own tentacles as a result. Ann-Gel sighed, shaking her head, Sharq smiling in response. All looked well, and despite Splin's sleep-inducing illness, it seemed rather peaceful. Except, as par the course, an unexpected visitor showed up. Knocking on the door.
"Hmm? Who could that be?" Maria asked, staring at the door.
"I'll get it." Sharq announced, dropping his oversized controller, making his way towards the door.
On the other side of the door, Aussie could not be more paranoid. She had made it this far, she reminded herself. Breathing in and out, maintaining a steady cycle of breathing, she knocked again.
Sharq flung the door open. "Hello?"
Aussie's overemphasized grin made her look less than friendly, and the beads of sweat dripping down were multiplying. "Hello Agent A."
"Oh! Hi, um… Sorry, I forgot your name." Sharq spoke up, staring at her goggles.
Gulping, Aussie nervously glanced to each side of the house. "Er, 4U55-13."
"Oh, Aussie!" Sharq beamed.
Aussie deadpanned. "...That's… One way to address me. I need to see you and Agent B about something."
"Splin? Come on in, he's inside." Sharq spoke up, clearing the doorway, gesturing her in.
Aussie nodded politely, walking in. She promptly proceeded to dash towards the nearest window, one still shattered, and leaped out, only to be caught, her octopus tentacles grabbed.
"G-Gah! You'll never take me alive!" She shouted, swinging behind her.
"I'm not going to take you, dead or alive." Maria told the Octoling soothingly, laying her down on the floor with a pat on the head.
Aussie blinked in confusion as she was pet like a dog. "...Uh, apologies? Would you happen to be an agent as well?"
Maria pursed her lips, shrugging. "Retired, but yes. Would you happen to be a friend of Tai?"
The mention of Tai's name caused a lump in Aussie's throat. She nodded solemnly, getting to her feet. Her less than cheerful demeanor caused the two Inklings standing to glance at each other, then back to Aussie, curiosity present.
"My apologies for arriving on such short notice, but I require Agent A and B's assistance." Aussie declared, adjusting the straps connecting her armor.
"I'm sorry. Splin's a bit… Under the weather." Maria inhaled through her teeth, pointing back towards the end of the house.
Aussie blinked, looking over Maria's shoulder. Splin laid in his bed, his eyes closed, with a serene silence surrounding him, as if he were-
"Is he?!" Aussie gasped.
Maria shook her head rapidly. "No no! He's fine, just sick."
Aussie instinctively sighed in relief. "...Ah."
"He won't be able to leave the house for a while. We don't know what he's suffering from either." Maria frowned, fist under her chin.
Aussie stared across the room, then at the wood floor, frowning. "...I see. Apologies."
She began making her way towards the door. A weight on her shoulder prompted her to spin around, Maria's hand on her shoulder.
"Hey, what's the matter?" Maria asked.
Aussie frowned. "T-41- Tai, and another colleague have been wrapped up in a troubling situation. I had initially come here to ask those two for help, but…"
Maria nodded in understanding. "Well, why don't I come?"
Aussie blinked, staring up at her. "You? Um-"
"I'm sure I can lend a hand. Just lead the way." Maria grinned.
"Are you sure, though? It isn't guaranteed safe, and I don't want to impose-" Aussie began.
"Don't worry! Maria's the best, she can help you with whatever you need!" Sharq cheered from the background.
Maria smiled, somewhat embarrassed at his praise. "I wouldn't say everything, but if there's a problem, I'll see what I can do."
"Plus, I can stay behind and watch Splin." Sharq spoke up.
"Right. I can go along with you if you want." Maria offered.
Aussie tilted her head, analyzing Maria silently. She hardly knew this Inkling, or who she was. As cheerful as she looked and as helpful as she sounded, the Octoling still had a tinge of doubt at the back of her mind. She knew of the other agents' exploits, but her…
"...Can you fight?" She asked carefully.
At the sound of it, Maria smirked. "Yes, as a matter of fact."
Aussie stared at her. She was raring to go, her eyes concealing energy that of a blaze. Shivering slightly she turned for the door, looking behind her.
"...Alright then. Uh, follow me." Aussie muttered.
Maria waved to the brothers as she left the house, cracking her knuckles excitedly. Aussie sweat a bit.
"So, who do you want me to fight?" Maria asked.
"Wha?!" Aussie asked, turning around.
"Just kidding!" Maria laughed, "You're really nervous. Don't worry, I don't bite."
Aussie frowned. "Well… You CAN fight, right?"
Maria blinked. "Oh. You were serious?"
Aussie stared to the side, gulping.
"I thought you just wanted me to show you some battle tricks or sniping tips. ...What do you need that needs to be fought?" She asked curiously.
Aussie shut her eyes, sighing. "...I'll show you."
Aussie poked her head out of the manhole carefully, every sense of her being alert for the Skell. Sliding out carefully, a constant noise caught her attention. Spinning to the right, she sighed, Cap'n was napping on his blue couch, snoring slightly. The rustling of the manhole behind her meant that her other guest was climbing up. Maria stuck her head out of the manhole, or rather, carried the manhole using her head, looking around.
"I don't see the Skell you were talking about." Maria commented, looking about the floating platforms.
"Hmm. Out of curiosity, did you happen to… See it before?" Aussie asked.
"Yeah." Maria spoke up, placing her feet on the dirt nearby, "Tough opponent."
"Wait, you fought it before? Then you helped us out before as well…" Aussie sighed, "I really should focus on training if I'm to catch up with Tai."
"Hmm?" Maria hummed curiously.
"...Yep. I keep on pushing Tai and Chi to their limits and yet Tai can enter and leave Octo Valley whenever she wants." Aussie frowned, adjusting her goggles.
"Um, actually-"
"I can't help but feel like I'm falling behind." Aussie murmured. She shook her head rapidly. "No, wait, gah! Apologies, I shouldn't be wasting time like this! We should be finding-"
"The Skell." Maria muttered, staring off into the distance.
"...Huh?" Aussie asked.
Maria pointed ahead at a floating platform. "That's what your looking for, isn't it?"
Aussie's eyes went wide. Nearly tearing her goggles off, she revealed her crimson irises, staring ahead in disbelief. The Skell, Chi sitting behind it with a frown, happened to be lobbing objects at Tai. Round barrels rolled down a slope leading up a pillar, Tai constantly hopping over each barrel as she made her way towards the top.
"Huh. Might as well call her Jumpman." Maria commented, then froze, "I've been spending too much time around the boys."
"We must help her!" Aussie told her, dashing off.
Maria gave a curt nod, following Aussie. She hopped in a ink line leading towards the platform the others were stranded on, leaping out of the ink onto the ground, hitting the ground running. Maria followed behind, the ink switching from red-violet to green as she dived in. Aussie took off towards the pillar, dashing up the ramp to meet Tai. As she ran, a stray barrel rocketed downwards.
"Tai! Watch out!" Aussie yelled, tackling Tai in the back.
"Gah! Aussie, wha-" Tai yelped, the two Octolings falling towards the ground.
As the two hit the ground, the barrel bounced over them, smashing into the ground below. A harsh buzzer sounded out. Looking up, the two realized that it was coming from the Skell.
"Sorry Tai, that's that." Chi spoke up, hopping up from beneath the Skell's leg.
"Darn it Aussie! I had a record and everything!" Tai pounded her fist on the ramp, "Ow!"
"What?! A record- Care to explain, Chi?" She asked in an irritated tone.
"That's a shame. So I can't fight anything?" Maria frowned behind them.
"Maria?" Tai asked.
Aussie pinched her temples in irritation. Tai scowled underneath her, Maria looked mildly disappointed, and Chi and the Skell backed away slowly. Aussie had none of that, glaring at the two, her goggles still undone very slightly, her red iris piercing them.
"...You two have been slacking off, haven't you?" Aussie asked.
Tai groaned. "Yes, now can you get off my back?"
Aussie stood up, still glaring down at Tai. "I went into enemy territory, snuck my way in, nearly had a heart attack, brought Mrs. Altezio over here-"
Maria gave a wave, smiling somewhat.
"AND YOU TWO HAVE BEEN JUMPING OVER BARRELS?!" Aussie asked, "That is the least productive- No, nevermind, ONE of your least productive feats of all time! Cod, what was Octavio thinking?!"
With that said, Aussie stormed off, heading to a nearby kettle, which was still smashed in from the Skell encounter. Tai brushed herself off, staring ahead at her, blinking. Aussie tearing out some of the metal pieces the kettle was constructed out of, then switched to an octopus, entering it with a huff.
"...So does that mean we're free to do whatever?" Tai asked.
No reply. Chi and the Skell sighed in relief while Maria stood to the side, looking up to the two in confusion.
"And return the Skell!" Aussie screamed.
The mech's visor light seemed to falter. Chi pat the metallic being on the back, walking back to base in shame. Tai huffed, walking down the ramp, muttering a "Yeah" as she went. As the Octolings left, the Skell hovering off under the platform, Maria leaned on the side of a rusty railing, blinking.
"...Okay." She muttered, walking off.
"Look, we're sorry we lied about having work to do." Tai grimaced. "We thought the Skell needed to loosen up its joints, and we just wanted to have a bit of fun."
"Sorry." Chi added, "We won't do it again."
"You happy?" Tai asked.
"Yes, thank you." Aussie sighed, walking off into the base.
"So uh…" Tai muttered. "How long do we have to stay in here again?"
Tai, Chi, and the Skell sat in a research lab, all of the doors save one shut. A ginormous hole patched with metal welded together blocked a would be exit. Aussie stared at them through her goggles, walking out, the door shutting behind her. She smiled.
As the door shut, the lights dimmed somewhat. Chi leaned on Tai with a frown, whimpering.
"Sorry man, that's just what happens. That's how it's always been, remember?" Tai yawned, shutting her eyes.
"Wait, are you sleeping?!" Chi asked in fear.
Tai's snores answered her. Chi frowned, just leaning on her superior for the rest of the night, wide awake and wide eyed, as the electronic hum of the Skell buzzed above her.
Aussie on the other hand, made her way to her bunk, the automatic door raising above her, allowing her entrance. She yawned, walking in, resting on her neatly organized bed with a yawn. As the door closed behind her, she adjusted her goggles, the lights dimming in the eye-wear as Aussie took a rest.
AN: Sometimes everyone has to take a break now and then.
Thanks to write n wrong and Darkstar248 for reviewing! write n wrong, thanks, there you have it. Maybe not the brothers, but Maria certainly…was there. Darkstar248, I dunno about giantesses, that sounds like a bit of an awkward request, you know that's uh...very specific of you. I mean, you like what you like and that's cool, but I dunno... Glad you're reviewing though.
Thanks for reading, this is ThePizzaLovingTurtle, off to fund a lighthouse in my town, see you.
EDIT: The new Splatfest dialogue says that Halloween is actually "canonically" Squidoween. Crud, now Shalloween is out. :(