Splatoon: The Brothers and the Others

A Clean Shot

Last time on the Brothers and the Others:

"My name is Mari," said Mari, beating Splin up.

"OW! I hate alternate universes!" Splin exclaimed, getting slammed into the house's floor.

"This is an alternate universe!" Mari decided, helping Splin up. "My brother ruined my life and killed everyone!"

The door to the house slammed open, enter Lalai with a Half-Life 2 Gravity Gun.

"Did somebody say 'killed everyone'?" Lalai asked.

Mari went to punch her, then got slammed into the house.

"Whoops, guess it must've been the rain!" Lalai said, leaving.

"I want her dead," Mari said, slamming the kitchen counter.

Splin glanced down at his arm. "I think I got shot."

"Walk it off, let's go!" Mari responded, getting up.

Splin recoiled. "What the fu-"

This time on the Brothers and the Others:

Splin winced as he walked out of the house. Even though the bullet wound was healed almost miraculously, he still felt a little sore in his arm. Well, he felt sore everywhere after Mari reacted so poorly upon meeting him, just slightly more so there.

That said, he thought it was a miracle that he was only "sore" after getting shot in the arm by a bullet. Like…an actual bullet. Splin had looked up old weapons online and skimmed a few books in stores and libraries, but he never thought much about actual weapons that used bullets, or pellets, or whatever that device Lalai used to launch Mari and the dirt back at the house.

It was a little embarrassing, given that he was supposed to be the 'smart' brother.

Gun knowledge aside, Splin put a hand on his sore arm, squeezing lightly. He winced at the self-inflicted squeeze. Even after getting shot, Splin couldn't shake the feeling that the gunshot felt wrong. Not just wrong, but absolutely incorrect. Even with average Inkling healing rate in battles, he would've thought that getting shot with metal bullets would be agony from how it was described. Was it because of the Inkling biology that it was able to heal so quickly? Why did Lalai use those types of weapons if it wasn't effective against Lalai or him?

Splin then realized something, internally cursing himself. "I'm in an alternate universe…or world. Or dimension? I don't even know if it follows the same rules as back home."

"Hey, you good?"

Splin turned around. Mari was standing in front of the house, stretching her fingers. She had a new set of black fingerless gloves on, noticeably worn.

"I guess. I don't think I should be, though," Splin frowned at his arm.

"It's okay. As long as a bullet doesn't hit any vital organs, you should be fine."

"Maybe that's just how it works here," Splin thought to himself, before asking, "You've been shot before?"

Mari shrugged. "Happens sometimes. You learn to roll with the punches."

"Punches? That bullet was inside my arm! Don't tell me this is actually normal here!"

Mari scratched her nose. "I mean, it's not really 'normal' Just something that happens. Can happen." She tilted her head. "They really don't have bullets like that in your dimension?"

Splin frowned. "No, just things like this." He pulled out his N-ZAP. "Completely ink-based. You guys have…" He paused, realizing he didn't know what the weapons were called.

"Oh, those guns? No, no. We don't use them in Turf; we use the same type of weapons you have there, here."

Splin stared down at his own weapon. "Then…where did Lalai get *those* guns?"

Mari sighed. "It's a long story. Can you help me with something? I can tell you all about it once we're off."

Splin scowled. "You mean Lalai?"

Mari shook her head. "No, this is something else. Besides, you don't have to be the one to kill her." She turned around and walked around the side of the house, gesturing for Splin to follow.

Splin felt every muscle in his body tense up. Kill her, she says. Must've been easy for her to say, given the hell that she's been living in. Splin walked around the house, following close behind.

Splin's mind was still buzzing with thoughts that would not stop. He felt like logic was starting to lose its hold. No matter how he justified the details to himself, this whole situation was still insane to him. Water didn't seem to hurt him as much anymore, or maybe that was just the shock from the bullets? Lalai was his girlfriend, but only in this universe, and was willing to kill for him.

He blushed at the prospect, turning his head to keep Mari from seeing it. It was mortifying, especially in this scenario, but he couldn't help but think it was a little flattering that he and Lalai would be so into each other that they'd kill for each other. That said, the blush faded quickly since

1): He had no idea what Splin(1) and Lalai were like here,

2): He and Lalai were just barely acquainted in his own world, with not much between them besides a few conversations, and

3): He and Mari WERE THE TARGETS.

Everything really did seem like he was walking through a funhouse mirror-version of his world. He wanted to know more; he wanted to know everything there was to know. Maybe Mari could fill him in. Hopefully she could.

Splin walked faster, attempting to catch up. Mari stopped in front of him, pointing ahead.

"I'm going to need your help with this."

There, lying on the grass, was a dinghy. A boat on the hills. It even had a name. "A.J.", painted on the side of the boat in big, bright orange letters.

Splin stared at Mari incredulously. "You want me to help you with what?"

"Do you know how to sail?"

"I know how to paddle," Mari explained.

Sure, they would paddle to the enemy. That sounded like a great idea. Splin would have griped more about the prospects in his head, but judging by the look Mari was giving him, he was being far too obvious about how he felt.

"Look, get in and I'll show you."

Splin gave up and got in. After he climbed into the dinghy, Mari ran behind the boat and pushed. He and the dinghy lurched forward, causing him to stumble and fall to the bottom. Mari's strength and speed was tremendous, as only a few seconds passed by until Splin could hear the water splash and the floor wobble beneath him.

Splin got up and looked around. Sure enough, the dinghy was in the water and the hills were behind them, a miserable gray sky and dull green background. Splin looked around. He couldn't see Mari anywhere.

"Down here."

Splin looked behind over the ship's stern. There, hands clenching the back of the dinghy, was Mari. She was in the water kicking her legs, making powerful splashes. The sight was certainly surreal to Splin, to say the least.

"Are you alright?" Splin asked.

Mari nodded. "Better once we put them down."

"Ah."

"I don't like this much more than you do, you know," Mari remarked.

Splin frowned. "Really? Doesn't look like it from where I'm standing."

Mari sighed. "To be honest…there's not much else I can do."

"Is there anywhere else you can go? Maybe find people who could help?" Splin asked.

Mari kicked at the water slower. "This is all that's left, Splin. Me and them. I haven't seen a single other person outside my friend group or family since this has started. Course, I couldn't walk outside without getting shot at."

"How are you still alive?"

Mari suddenly jumped up from the water. Splin recoiled as she shook herself off, avoiding the water droplets as best he could. Mari's legs stood their ground in spite of the boat rocking and her arms were poised to intercept an attack.

"Hit me."

Splin frowned. "Here? With what?"

"Anything. Hit me," Mari repeated.

Splin glanced down at his lap. He picked up the N-ZAP, then looked up at Mari with a scowl. Splin got up, wobbling slightly as he tried to keep his balance. Mari remained steadfast, keeping her stance even as the dinghy shook. With a tentative press of the trigger, Splin fired a single ink bullet at Mari.

"Ha!" Mari exclaimed, meeting the bullet with the palm of her hand.

Exactly like earlier, Mari flashed a bright blue and blocked the bullet. It splattered against her, seemingly disappearing as if it were completely negated.

"Again!"

"What?" Splin lowered the gun.

"You aren't going to be able to take down anyone with just a single shot. Keep firing."

Splin frowned. "Is this really neces-"

"We are going to kill people, Splin. You are going to need all the practice you can get," Mari asserted.

"Ugh." Splin shook his head. "I know…it's just…Cod. This is incredibly screwed up. The last couple months have just been me inside my house working on a Beakon. Now I have a girl with superpowers telling me I need to kill people I know and myself."

"They're not superpowers, they're fighting abilities. They're different," Mari remarked.

"That's another thing. Where did you get them from? Where did Lalai get all those guns from?" Splin asked, firing more volleys of ink at Mari.

Mari crossed her arms. Well, she started to cross her arms, but every time an ink bullet was about to graze her, she would quickly strike a pose and parry them. "Ready for that long story?"

Splin nodded, lowering the gun.

"You can keep shooting at me, it's fine."

"I don't think anyone's said that sentence to me ever," Splin said, "I think I'd get distracted by your whole…flexing thing going on."

"Oh, the parry." Mari nodded. "That's thanks to Splin(1). The guns? Also Splin(1). He got some powers a while back that…I'm not sure what they actually do, I just know that he can do pretty much anything. He gave Lalai so many guns as thanks for helping him."

"Okay, but you said that the N-ZAP and other weapons like it are still used here in Turf," Splin interjected, "What about the other ones?"

"The ones with solid bullets?" Mari frowned. "There was a big trend over collecting and refining human junk a few years ago. A lot of weapon designs and ideas were thrown all over the place, and eventually people came up with their own Turf Wars where they used actual ballistics instead of squirting ink."

"You ever try those?" Splin asked.

"A little. They were nuts, man. When people found out you could point and click and get someone across entire buildings, a ton of people checked it out and it got popular."

"What about that one gun, the orange one with the claw that picked up the ground?" Splin continued, "Didn't look ink-based or like it shot bullets."

Mari frowned, shaking her head. "No clue. Probably a present from Splin(1)."

"And…your fighting abilities?"

Mari sighed. She sat down and took a deep breath. "Before all of this, we were basically brother and sister. I was a little girl with nowhere to go and dumped in a universe that doesn't know I exist. He and Sharq took me in."

"Uh huh…"

"I didn't really know how to fight like this. I used to only know how to use weapons like all the other Inklings in my universe."

"Wait…you didn't know how to fight until after you came here?" Splin asked.

Mari shook her head. "Nope. But I learned fast. After Splin(1) and Sharq were done with work or when I was done with Ranked Battles or really whenever, we would always go down to an arcade or to Prothe's store and play some games. I always liked fighting games."

"Prothe…wait…" Splin frowned.

"Yeah. He's still around," Mari scowled.

"Wait. You learned how to fight from video games?" Splin asked.

Mari nodded somberly, as if she was asked about a great burden she carries.

"So…the parrying…were you trained that? From…"

"Street Fighter III, yeah," Mari said.

"The hell is that?" Splin wondered. "And you just…learned that? From playing the game?" Splin glared at her with disbelief.

"I played it a lot," Mari replied.

Splin reclined in the boat and stared at the sky. This girl was going to try to kill her enemies with spinning kicks and fireballs. "So can you shoot fire from your hands?"

"Well…no. I can kinda do a dragon punch."

Mari proceeded to jump, rocking the boat. Splin quickly grabbed the side and held on as Mari barely got off the ground, punching up into the air for just a moment.

"And…I can't do any fireballs. I haven't figured that out yet," Mari admitted, sitting back down, "I'm great at parrying, though."

"That's why you need me, then. I need to be the one to shoot Lalai because you can't do a quarter-circle motion. …In real life." Splin paused, going over the ramifications in his head.

"Hey, it's harder than it looks," Mari said.

Splin looked out across the water. Turning around, he saw the hills, now a dark green blotch fading into the horizon. "Where are we heading, anyway?

Mari sat up and looked over the bow of the ship. "Inkopolis. That's where Splin(1)'s base of operations is."

"Across all this water?" Splin remarked, looking overboard, "It's been like twenty minutes at least. Are we fighting Lalai on this?"

"We're about to find out," Mari said, looking up.

Splin followed Mari's gaze. In the sky floated a familiar foe, Lalai. Her long pink tentacles fluttered in the wind behind her as she glowered down at the two. Mari stood on the bow, raising her fist, while Splin fumbled to get the N-ZAP ready.

"She's…floating." Splin put, blinking stupidly.

"So, you're really going to try it," Lalai called down to them, "You've got bigger balls than I expected, Mari."

"Gross," Mari snarled.

"You two are real cute. You even got Splin his favorite gun." Lalai pointed down at him. "It's like I'm meeting you two for the first time again."

"Get ready," Mari whispered to Splin, raising her fists.

"We're going to fight here?" Splin asked, looking down and around the dinghy, "There's no space!"

"Oh, don't worry about a thing Splin. I figured that Mari might wanna settle this sooner or later, so I decided to prepare ahead of time! Observe!" Lalai announced with a wink.

As though it were spawned from thin air, the strange gun with the claw materialized in Lalai's hands. This time, it glowed a bright blue instead of orange, yet looked exactly the same otherwise. Not one to waste time, Lalai pointed the gun down at the water and activated the strange weapon, causing a thin light-blue laser to fire out into the water below.

Splin held on to the side of the dinghy with one hand and clenched the N-ZAP in the other. Mari turned her head and nodded toward Lalai with an urgent look in her eyes. Splin's own eyes widening, he realized quickly what he needed to do and stood up, attempting to take aim.

There was a crash, sending Splin to the dinghy floor. Water sprayed his face, which Splin instinctively clutched at, yelling in shock. His face would be fine.

"What?"

Yes. His face would be fine. Splin blinked, wiping it off. He was wet and cold, but for whatever reason, his face would be fine. Is fine. Splin's face was not at all damaged by the water.

But of course, the strange lack of damage to himself and the equally strange feeling in Splin's gut went away quickly, replaced by awe. Out from what appeared to be endless ocean was a large, square-like surface comprised of marbled stone. A blue glow surrounded the stone island, connected by the gun Lalai was holding.

The beam from the gun cut out, but the stone island stayed in place.

"How do you like my arena?" Lalai asked, floating down to the surface. "Splin made it for me. S'little partnership gift he let me have as long as I kept an eye on you."

Mari scoffed as she exited the dinghy, stepping foot on the arena surface. "Goody. You think if I murdered enough innocent people, Splin(1) would've let me have a rectangle?"

Lalai shrugged. "Sorry Mar. You could've stayed on our side and we could've just gone on our merry way. You could've even just stayed in the house and I wouldn't have to shoot you dead, but I guess that's the problem with giving choices. You aren't the one who gets to choose 'em."

Splin steadied his aim and focused on Lalai, only for Lalai to notice, waggling a finger back at him. "I see you there, shorty! Sorry, but I'm afraid that this is a 1-on-1-type fight. You'll get your turn soon enough."

Splin frowned back at her, squeezing the trigger anyway. The only thing that happened was the N-ZAP clicking back at him.

"Empty?" Splin thought, quickly inspecting the N-ZAP.

"Don't bother. As long as I'm still standing, any gun you have's not going to do a damn thing," Lalai explained.

Splin frowned. "You control guns?"

"Yeah, it's really cool," Lalai grinned, pulling out a pistol of some kind and twirling it on her finger, "See, Prothe and I got bonuses for helping Splin out with his plan."

After twirling, she casually bounced the pistol off the tip of her finger and landed it with her finger in the trigger. Lalai pointed at the sky, shot once, and then retrieved a long rifle from where the pistol was.

"Ain't that cool? I get to have any gun I want!" She took the rifle and broke it over her knee, taking two pistols out from the scattered parts. "I don't even know what some of these do!"

Lalai continued to show-off, smashing the pistols together into a Brella, then opening the umbrella canopy to reveal a rocket launcher. She then fired the rocket launcher, blowing herself up, creating a black cloud of smoke. As soon as the smoke cleared, she instantly went back to screwing around with a Slosher, spinning the bucket on the tip of her nose as though she were a sea lion at a show, then dropping it and snatching it before it hit the ground.

"Oh man…" Lalai sighed happily, then scowled suddenly. "Doesn't mean much when I don't have anything to shoot at, though."

Splin's brow furrowed. "She's a killer. Okay, got it."

Mari stepped up and raised her fist. "I'm going to avenge all the people you shot dead."

Lalai smiled. "Oh, Mari." Her smile stayed as she floated down.

She tilted the bucket over, pouring the contents out on the ring. Several weapons of all shapes and sizes littered the ground, seemingly never ending until Lalai set the bucket down. Picking up a revolver from the pile of guns, she aimed it at Mari with a grin.

"I'm glad we had one last talk!" Lalai chirped, happily shooting Mari square in her chest.

"Ah!" Splin exclaimed, reaching out for her.

Mari simply scoffed, brushing off the bullet that landed on her shirt with a parry. It fell to the ground with a clatter, astonishing Splin and also making him feel slightly stupider. Mari screamed a battle cry, running directly toward Lalai with her fists raised.

"Again? We're going to do this again?" Lalai sighed, picking up a Splattershot Pro.

With all the grace of a jellyfish riding roller skates, Lalai pointed in Mari's general direction and started blasting, sharp ink projectiles tearing through the air and denting the ground where they landed. Mari dodged and weaved, dashing past the hail of ink and closing in as she swung her body left and right.

Lalai scoffed, throwing the gun at Mari who smacked it out of the air. The Splattershot Pro landed in the boat Splin was taking shelter in, firing up into the air as Splin ducked and took cover.

"Holy shit!" Splin yelped as a shot whizzed past his ear. "Uh, I mean ship!"

"Oops! Sorry Splin!" Lalai called out.

"Ya!" said Mari, smashing her fist into Lalai's side.

Lalai stumbled back, landing on the pile of guns. The guns started to fire on their own, as if Lalai just landed on a pile of angry, black and grey snakes armed to the teeth. They fired indiscriminately, shooting other guns off the arena into the sea, firing bullets or ink into the distance, yet none of them managed to tag Splin, Mari, or even Lalai as they went off.

"What is HAPPENING?" Splin shouted.

"WHAT?" Mari shouted back, struggling to hear anything over the fifty different weapons firing off.

Lalai huffed, snapping her fingers. The guns stopped their deadly racket immediately. Lalai stood up, her face red and smoke practically coming out of her ears. "You little scamp! I'm trying to be courteous here!"

Mari took another stance, raising open palms to face Lalai.

Splin peaked his head out of the dinghy, quickly throwing the Splattershot Pro overboard just in case. "Courteous?"

Lalai smiled and waved at Splin. "Oh hiiiiii! Glad to see I didn't getcha by mistake!" She turned to face Mari again. "Like I was saying, you can kiss the tip of my revolver! I'm trying not to kill anyone I'm not supposed to, and there you go, making cheap shots!"

"Get bent," Mari spat at her, taking a step forward, "Maybe I would've thought about it before the last five million times you've tried to shoot me."

"Oh, don't be that way," Lalai rolled her eyes, "You go through bullets like I go through fries. It's not like I was going to be the one to kill you."

Their conversation was interrupted by Splin screaming, "WHAT DO YOU MEEEEEAAAN?" He made wild gestures toward the pile of weapons.

"Don't worry Splin!" Lalai said with a wink, bouncing her hips back and forth playfully. "I'll make it so that nothing here will be able to kill you!"

"You can DO that? How?" Splin shouted.

She snapped her fingers again. Suddenly, several different assault rifles emerged and pointed at Splin. Mari and Splin's eyes went wide, but before either of them could react, they all fired on Splin and the dinghy. Splin braced himself, covering his face and his body with his arms no matter how futile it was.

As all of the bullets either shot right past him or simply hit the side of the boat.

That said, the dinghy had now sprung several leaks, already filling with water. Splin leaped out onto the arena, looking behind him as it sunk into the ocean and disappeared from view.

"That was our boat!" Mari dashed straight at Lalai with a straight lunge, fist aimed at her face.

Lalai glared at her, firing at her with a Splattershot Jr. Mari parried the ink, flashing blue with every shot that bounced off her, only to get grabbed by Lalai and swung into the pile of guns.

"It's just my gift!" Lalai shouted across the arena, grinning at Splin. "See Splin, it was getting really slow around here!"

"Hya!" Mari screamed, throwing a gun past Lalai's face.

Lalai ducked out of the way and picked up a shotgun, firing it with one hand. "The Octarians were all beaten and the Squid Sisters didn't need me for anything either. Then, one day, you came along and asked me something!" Lalai paused, placing a finger on her pursed lips, quizzically looking up to the sky. "Or I guess my Splin asked me something, to be clear."

Mari rose from the ground, knocking the shotgun out of her hand. Lalai casually grabbed a taser out of nowhere and pointed it to Mari, tagging her square in the chest with two electrically charged barbs.

Mari fell to the ground, immobilized, stuck in a glare and a snarl with her hands poised to rip Lalai limb from limb. Lalai stepped on Mari's arm, aiming both the taser and a pistol at Mari's head. "Can't parry that yet, huh? Good game Mari! Maybe if you focused more on shooting instead of fighting, you would've actually landed a hit."

She crouched down and put more weight on her leg, making Mari writhe and scream. "Now that I'm here…it really doesn't feel like it was worth it. All of this…for this." She eyed Mari. "I won't let you suffer anymore."

Lalai pulled the trigger, then stumbled. She blinked. A pain began to spread from her lower body, then up to her chest. Shots rang out again, and Lalai felt herself hit the floor. Despite being shot, she felt almost numb to the sensation. She laid on the arena on her chest, looking over her shoulder.

Splin, breathing heavily, walked over with the barrel of his gun still smoking. He walked up to Mari, dropping his gun and picking her up, slinging her arm over his shoulder.

"Nice shot…" Mari remarked, staring down at Lalai.

"I didn't think it would be so simple," Splin said, staring at Lalai as well. "I just picked up that gun and fired."

"Didn't think you would catch the gun. That definitely wasn't part of the plan, but thank God you did."

Mari sighed, leaning on Splin. Her clothes were damaged and she smelled a little burnt, but she seemed incredible for someone who was just shot at several times and tased. That said, they won, and both were still alive.

"…But now what?" Splin asked, looking around.

Mari squinted. Lalai was dead, good, but now they were stranded on an arena in the middle of the ocean with no boat. She glared at Lalai.

"Sorry about your dinghy, Ari." Mari looked up at the sky.

"…Don't worry about that."

Splin and Mari flinched. Lalai raised one hand up at them, bleeding profusely and seemingly unable to stand.

"It's like I said…" Lalai said between coughs. "I'm not trying to kill anyone I'm not supposed to."

Mari threw caution to the wind. She pulled away from Splin and leaped for Lalai, despite the telltale signs that the guns were going to go off. Lalai smirked, dropping her hand then looking at the side.

"Fixed it."

"Mari!"

Mari hit the ground, skidding to a halt. Her head snapped to the direction Lalai was smirking. There in the water, rising up from the depths was Ari's dinghy. The boat appeared as though it had suffered no damage at all, with naught a bullet hole to be found.

Splin looked down at Lalai in confusion. "How the hell did you do that?"

Lalai grinned, pink blood dripping from her mouth. "I wasn't totally honest with you, Splin. I'm not completely in control of my guns. I also control the bullets and projectiles."

"…So that means you…how does that fix the boat?" Splin asked.

"I just undid the damage the bullets caused."

Splin blinked. "By magic."

"Yeeeeeeah, let's go with that," Lalai responded, smiling at him.

"That doesn't make any sense…" Splin said, "But if you can do that, then how did you-"

"Get shot?" Lalai beamed. "You are a good shot Splin, but I'm not going to die from three measly shots."

Before she could say anything else that would give Splin questions, Mari quickly ran over and kicked Lalai across the arena. Splin's eyes widened as she tumbled across and landed on the opposite side of the floating platform. Lalai spit up more blood as she landed, clutching herself as she writhed in pain.

"Wait, Mari!" Splin called out as she stomped towards her.

"She has to go," Mari said, standing over Lalai.

Lalai continued to smile. "Oh Mari…you are so dead. I wish it didn't have to be this way."

She didn't respond, instead slamming her fist into Lalai's face. "This is for Willie!"

Lalai looked at Splin, still smiling. She looked as though she wanted to say something.

"This is for Zip!" Mari said, punching her again.

She didn't say anything or do anything. That was it. Splin looked away.

"And this one's for your sister," Mari said, landing one final blow.

With that, she was gone. Mari was panting, fists still painted pink. What was left of Lalai began to melt, leaving behind a pink puddle on the arena floor. Splin just stood there, mortified at what had just happened. The girl who had punched Lalai into nothing walked over to him, then placed her hand on his shoulder.

"Good work Splin," Mari told him, walking toward the boat, "We just need to get two more."

Splin said nothing. For a while, he just stood there in the center of the arena, in the middle of a pile of guns. The stinging from his earlier gunshot wound seemed to have faded completely, and all he was left with was a deep sadness and a sinking feeling of dread.

"Two more…" Splin muttered, finally getting the courage to walk back to the boat.

AN: If you're wondering what's going on, then that's probably natural.

I realize that this story's going in a direction that seems like it's jumping the shark. And it kinda is, but it's been years since I've thought of this and I really need to start tying it up. Who knows, I might make it for that One Missed Call crossover that was semi-planned like 5 or 6 years ago. But for now, I really just want to start ending one of the ideas I had for the characters now.

Thanks RealCoolDude for the review. I appreciate the honesty and emotion in your reviews and for sticking around for so long.

Thanks for reading, this is ThePizza-LovingTurtle, remember that $70 games are expensive. See ya.