Title: Phone Calls Among Billionaire Superheroes V.

Summary: Because sometimes you need to talk to your Gothamite buddy about the bat-thing roaming the gloomy streets of his city, or ask why in god's name is your friend flying around California's sunny sky in a red and gold tin can. Or, a collection of short phone calls/scenes set somewhere in the movies.

Warnings: None.

Notes: The Dark Knight - Part I

Disclaimer: I don't own the Dark Knight Trilogy, Iron Man, any of its characters. Sadly.

OoOoO

"Tony." It was a single word, just a name, but Bruce could hear the weariness and resignation in his own voice. He didn't know how Tony found out, but he obviously had. Though, really, Bruce had been expecting a call sooner rather than later.

"Hey, Brucie!" Tony greeted. "You're never going to believe who just called me," He prompted, wasting no time with other pleasantries.

Bruce bit back a sigh as he waited for Tony's dramatic pause to be over. He didn't have to wait long.

"Rachel!" Tony exclaimed gleefully. "Your very special friend Rachel called me. Me," He emphasized. "Shocking, isn't it? I couldn't believe it myself when she gave me her name. I almost didn't recognize her voice."

He actually blinked in surprise. Even if only a couple of people knew about his plan to turn himself in, he still hadn't expected that.

"Rachel Dawes, calling little old me. The same pretty young thing that radiates disapproval and disdain whenever we find ourselves together in the same room." He wasn't even exaggerating. It had been a while since they last met, but Tony still remembered the looks. "The girl who hated me from the moment she met me because I was corrupting the little angel that was her best friend."

"Rachel never hated you," Bruce corrected. While it was true she wasn't Tony's biggest fan, there was no denying she also admired Tony's brilliant brain and even found some of his antics amusing.

And yes, it would be better for him if they focused on that part and not the call and what had been said.

"Riiight. Why would someone who despises your fake public person so much hate someone like me, huh?" Tony asked good-natured. He didn't give a damn how Rachel felt about him. She was Bruce's friend, not his, and while he could admit (at least to himself) that doing what she was trying to do in Gotham took balls (and was also incredibly stupid, because it sure as hell was) that didn't mean he liked her or wanted her to like him. They were fine just like they were, with Bruce as the only point of connection between them. Speaking of which-

"But that's not important right now," Tony dismissed, his good humor gone as he brought the call back on track. "Wanna guess what she wanted to talk about? She had some pretty damn interesting things to say, let me tell you."

There was no getting out of this, then. The only surprise here was that the call came from Rachel rather than Alfred.

"Rachel told me the Bat was going to turn himself in because some crazy psycho told him to."

It wasn't a question, so Bruce remained silent as stared at the bank of dark monitors before him.

"Nothing to say, huh?" It wasn't going to be easy to make Bruce see reason if he hadn't listened to Rachel and Alfred, but Tony was always up for a challenge. "Well, buckle up, Brucie-bear, because I have plenty to say for the both of us, starting with how that shit is the stupidest fucking thing I've ever heard. I'm not even kidding right now."

"I don't have a choice," Bruce countered. He did his best to prepare himself for this. None of his arguments had worked with Alfred or Rachel, but that didn't stop him from hoping this time would be different. It was Tony after all.

"So, you either keep working to bring that fucker down or get locked in a cell while he burns the city to the ground. It sure as hell sounds like a no–brainer to me." Tony replied, a sliver of annoyance peaking behind the mocking tone. "I mean, are you really planning to leave a bunch of cops with nothing more than their crappy police training and their wits to deal with that nut job? That sounds like a very poor choice.

"Or what? Do you honestly think that psycho will wash up the creepy make-up and crawl back to the hole he came from once you're locked up?"

Bruce hated the fact he couldn't deny the truth in Tony's words. It terrified him to think about what may happen once he was in custody, especially now that Gordon was gone. He could only hope Joker's attention would stay on him just like everyone else's.

"I can't stand aside and do nothing while he keeps killing people because of me."

"So don't," Tony snapped. "Stop listening to your stupid guilty conscience and keep working until you find and stop that fucking bastard. Don't just fucking lay down and let him beat you."

"This isn't about winning or losing," Bruce snapped back, tired of trying to explain the same thing over and over again. "This isn't even about me or him. This is about the people he's targeting, all the innocents he will keep killing until I take off the mask. I ... I can't let him keep doing this. I just can't."

"Okay," Tony said after a pause, voice oddly calm again. "Let me get this straight. You don't care about all the people he will undoubtedly keep killing once you're in cuffs, because then he will have no reason to shout left and right how that's all your fault. Except he's probably going to find a way to keep blaming you for everything because he's fucking insane."

"That's not-" Bruce swallowed hard. "You don't understand. You can't."

"You're damn right I don't." Tony pondered how feasible it would be to knock Bruce out and lock him up somewhere until he came back to his senses. Alfred would be willing to help with that. Probably. Maybe. He could even try to get Lucus on board too.

"I'm going to do this, Tony. I have to."

It was a decision made. There was no trace of doubt or hesitation in Bruce's words. Tony cursed him and his stubborn ass in his mind.

"You know, what? You can do whatever the hell you want to do, but I'm so going to remind you of this the next time you try to berate me because you think I did something stupid."

The corner of Bruce's lips flicked upward. "I'm sure you will."

They fell into a thick silence, filled with all the unspoken things between them. It almost felt like a goodbye.

Tony cleared his throat before speaking. "I suppose they're going to go after your money first. Freezing your accounts and all that jazz." There was another pause, smaller this time as he looked out the window. "I'll get Pepper to call my lawyers and we'll-"

"Don't," Bruce cut in sharply. "You need to keep your distance. Stay as far away as possible from me and this whole mess."

"Just shut the hell up, okay?" Tony snapped. "I'm going to do whatever the fuck I want, just like you are, and if that something is hiring a team of the best damn lawyers money can buy to defend your ass I'm damn well going to do it, end of the fucking story."

"Okay," Bruce said quietly.

Tony took a moment to get his shit together and focus on what needed to be done. "Just try not to fuck things for yourself more than you have to, okay? And don't let that fucking psycho kill you, for fuck's sake."

Nothing was truly amusing about that, but Bruce still found a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. "I will do my best."

"Alright," Tony said, clearing his throat one more time. "I have preparations to make, and I'm sure you do too, so I guess that's all for now."

"You know you don't have to help me with all this." The inflection to make it a question was missing, but Bruce waited for an answer anyway.

"Please," Tony scoffed. "I'm Tony-fucking-Stark. Nobody makes me do shit."

"Of course not. How could I forget?"

"Damn straight."

The moment of levity was gone almost as soon as it came, leaving a thick silence neither seemed willing to break.

"Thanks for everything, Tony," Bruce said softly.

There was nothing but more silence for a long time before Tony forced his voice to sound light and carefree again. "Sure, no problem. You know how much I love drama and shit, so thanks for that."

Against his will, the words brought a genuine smile to Bruce's lips.

"So. We'll talk later."

Bruce frowned slightly. "I don't know if I-"

"We'll talk later," He repeated, leaving no room for arguments. Tony wasn't sure how, but he was damn well going to make that fucking happen.

"Okay," Bruce agreed easily.

There was nothing left to say, but they stayed on the line. Both were unwilling to end the call and cut the connection just yet.

OoOoO

a/n: I'm so sorry it took me so long to post this. Even if this is an old fic like the rest, I like to make edits and rewrites before posting my old stuff, and I just couldn't for the life of me find a way to end this (yep, endings are my kryptonite, along with long fics). I'm still not happy with the ending, but I don't think it's too awful. So, yeah. I hope you enjoyed it.

Also, I'm sorry for all the swearing too. Tony was just really pissed off here, okay? And yeah, I admit I used him to vent a little about my own feelings and thoughts about Bruce's stupid decision to turn himself in. #Sorrynotsorry.