Ok, headbutting; not recommended under normal circumstances. Headbutting a krogan was about as smart as leaping out of a plane without a parachute. Had rage not held me in its heated embrace, the crack echoing in my head would have concerned me. The room still swam to the point there were three of her, my eyes locking onto one of them. And the pain! Only the adrenaline kept it at bay, but as soon as it vanished, it would floor me. Raisha's smile caused a cold stone to sink in my stomach but fury surpassed me. My fear was a drop in an ocean of lava. Dammit, why didn't people listen? Do they think these things cure themselves in a few hours? Fuck this krogan! Why did I let her out of the tank? Raisha approached with hands open at her sides.
"Be at peace, Endellion," she said, every syllable soft and smooth. The burning wound refused to quench.
"Fuck you!" I snapped. Raisha kept walking, watching my expression as if she doubted my ability to throw the punch. Did she want to test that? My teeth ground until my jaw ached.
"At ease, please, young one. I wished to see what would overcome the fear," she said, soothing me with a gentle tone. A snarl hissed at her.
"Ah fuck, you're just Mat'al in psychological form!" I growled. Raisha tilted her head to the side. My fingers tightened, the fist shaking. Raisha raised her hand, taking my raised fist in her hand. My teeth bared as my muscles tensed. She pried the fingers free.
"You have mentioned this Mat'al before. It sounds like we share similar ideas," she smiled. I glared.
"Oh yeah? Well until you start-" no, wait, don't tell her! My jaw clamped shut. She might think shooting me is a good idea otherwise. My heated stare evened, focusing. To have two people shooting at me would be hell! Raisha ignored my cut sentence, lowering my arm to my side.
"Endellion, I understand you are angry, how can one not? However, please understand that it is necessary. You are a strong woman with stubborn tendencies. Yet fear holds you. I wished to see if it was possible to break its hold on you. And I did. You do not have this 'social-phobia' you claim to have. If you did, you would not raise your voice at me. You fear people judging you or mocking you. You are afraid of insulting people and fear their retaliation. And I know I can help free you from that," she said.
"Good luck, sister," I snorted, the anger easing. My arm yanked free, lowering myself to sit on the counter again. We still had to get out of here and this 'Preeze' person would help me without the females. My only hope was that she didn't shove a knife in my back. "I've been trying to get over that for the past few months,"
"Please, allow me to try," she said as she removed the Phalanx from the females and returned it. My hand yanked it back, sheathing it at my hip with a hot glare. "Now, Endellion, I asked you what you would do if you faced the person who took your weapons. What would you like to say to him, not what you would," she asked. My eyes narrowed.
"Well... I would demand to have my guns back..." I said, unsure of where this was taking me.
"Word for word," Raisha verified. My face scrunched up, wondering what she was on about. What words were running through my head? My eyes squeezed shut, picturing the turian before me. My weapons on his belt, melted down to nothing, my fingers clenched.
"Um... W-Well, something like, 'Saren, you bastard, give me back my stuff before I punch your face in'," I coughed. No that sounded pathetic.
"Then say it, like you mean it," Raisha pushed. A frown formed, scanning her expression, my lungs took in a deep breath. Acting was not my strong suit to begin with. Added to that, there was no way to convince this krogan otherwise. I tried anyway. If only to make her shut up so we can get moving again.
"Saren, you prick, give me back my stuff before I kick your ass into the next century," I said. Not convincing at all...
"Firmer, be confident. Remember, you will have a small army of krogan at your back. He cannot do much to you," Raisha pushed. A grumble rose. That didn't help. You needed a firm backbone to stare down a turian. Mine was more like melted butter than anything else.
So my sentence repeated, trying to sound firmer to make this experience end. She kept pushing me, demanding I pull myself together. She angered me to stiffen my nerves. But all that ended up doing was causing me to yell at her instead. Raisha fell silent, pondering once more. The other females had been quiet, watching as one of their own tried to turn a coward into a hero. That's what it felt like anyway.
"It would appear," Raisha began, her tone soft once more. "That anger is not usable for you in terms of diplomacy and conversation. You are also not afraid of me or at least hold strong opinions about me. You need to face something you fear before you can become a stronger person. Let us try something else," She backed away, giving me space.
My eyes watched her with unease, breath rushing from my lungs in great gusts as my blood cooled. My back pressed against the wall as the krogan eyed me again. She was trying to read me. What she saw, no one would know, but it felt much the same as Mat'al had. Mat'al's stare had pissed me off and brought out a feisty side of me that hadn't existed before then. Raisha's didn't annoy me, but it made me uncomfortable. It was as if she was staring at the fibres that made my soul, teasing me apart, my emotions, my beliefs. The stare invaded my personal space and grew suspicions that everyone but me was psychic.
"Very well. Endellion, try to imagine this," Raisha said. My moan sounded, swaying. "Imagine you are facing someone you fear; an old class mate, a family member, Saren. Imagine anyone who you cannot stomach to speak against,"
My face blanked. There were several people that terrified me. Saren was the obvious choice and that was before he stole my weapons. But my mind pondered the question. Who terrified me, made me feel powerless? Keplar fitted the bill, he was untouchable. No one was able to harm him, no one had defeated him in a physiological war. He had belittled me more than a few times in front of a crowd. He covered his tracks so well everyone would forever live as his work pet. That sense of hopelessness against a foe who didn't even need to lift a hand... that was more frightening than Saren.
"Now imagine someone you care about, someone close to your heart," Raisha's voice became a low mantra, lulling me into the imagination.
I knew where this was going and it didn't sit well with me. My first thought ran to Travis, my now long dead boyfriend. God, he hadn't crossed my mind in a long time. Between waking in this world and trying to avoid thinking of home... No, that can of worms could stay shut. He was missed; his gentle jokes, encouraging voice. My heart bubbled away at the memories. But Val's face flashed before me, then Mat'al and Garrus, Tali, Liara... They were all close to my heart for different reasons, and in different ways. Mat'al became my final choice, he was somewhat understandable. I nodded to Raisha.
"Now, what would they say to your most feared person?" she asked. My eyes widened. Ok, that was not what where I saw this going. With my jaw slack, my imagination struggled to picture where this was going.
"I-I'm not sure..." I said. What would Mat'al say? My frown deepened. "Maybe some backwards half-truth to confuse him... or maybe he'd just say it to his face... "
"Say what?" Raisha asked. My gaze met hers for a time.
"Something like 'So, you like using my protégé's work as your own... no, no. Nothing like that," My hands buried into my hair, glaring at the floor. What would Mat'al say? Would he laugh at him then shoot him? Or would he taunt him?
"If you are struggling, you may try this one. What would your closest person say to your most feared if your most feared was holding you at gunpoint?"
"Oh, that one's easy. He'd raise an eyebrow and shoot him... No. He would scold me asking how the hell I got into this predicament. Then he would shoot the bad guy…. Then shoot me with an air round or something. Depends on how he's feeling," I shrugged. Raisha smiled.
"And do you think you could mimic that?" she asked. My eyes narrowed. "If your most feared was holding your closest hostage, would you be able to respond like that?"
"What... um, I'm… not sure," I answered. That was a good point though. If my friends were taken hostage and their only hope was me... could I do that?
"Raisha, I apologise, but we must move," a lime-crested female informed. Raisha glanced behind her to the female. She nodded.
"Let us find Preeze," Raisha gathered up her shotgun, preparing it for the battles ahead. "Think on the situation, Endellion. See what emerges,"
My legs followed the females on auto-pilot as we wandered deeper into the compound. So distracted by thoughts, my mind couldn't concentrate on looking for geth. Why were Saren and Keplar scary, what was it about these men that struck terror into me? Physically, Keplar couldn't do a damn thing to me, even if he fired me, Mat'al had my back. Saren? Well, being part Reaper meant he may not kill me. Hurt me, but not kill me. Could my nerves hold up against him? My last fight with Shepard before being abandoned on the Citadel didn't go so well but it did the trick. My thoughts shattered as gunfire sounded. Geth waddled out from around the corner.
Geth was one thing my spine could stand against. I found cover in a corner, keeping low to allow a taller krogan to shoot. My body settled, falling into a rhythm as my head poked out, shot a few bullets, then reloaded afterwards. This continued until more arrived, pushing further up the hallway. The females fell back, but I remained on the corner until they turned the corner. When one turned, my legs launched me up, kicking it in the head. My hands used the shoulder to vault over to the joining corridor. The geth crackled raising a gun, but missed me and hit its friend. A laugh burst free when another finished it, my body flowing, zig zagging down the hall. A glance to my shields showed a near full bar. The geth followed, allowing the females to close in and blast them with shotguns. Mat'al had shown me how not to be afraid in battle. If my cowardly hide could fight, then my nerves should be able to handle talking to someone, right? My head poked out to fire a few more pistol rounds at the dwindling geth. Then the final geth dropped to the floor. My knees pushed me out from the corner, scavenging for ammo off the fallen geth.
"We appear to be approaching a prison cell, perhaps we can find Preeze here," Dyla said to Raisha. Raisha nodded.
"We can only hope," she answered, striding past me, aiming for the doors at the end of the hall.
The room was different to the one the females had been held in. It still held the large tank like prison cells, but there was no science equipment here. The empty room held a bundle of cells along one wall and little else. My eyes found a group of salarians held within the cells, the metal floor creaking under my feet. They looked up, eyes wide as they stared at the female krogan and human. Dyla jogged up to the back of the room, staring at the final few cells. Her expression fell, her head dropped limp on her neck. Preeze was dead. There was no need to see a dead krogan, not that there wouldn't be much to see much with the females crowding close. Instead, the salarians held my attention, the cell with 4 salarians inside. You could do this, Shaik!
"Endellion Shaik," I greeted, only the barest of quivers. Deep breaths, girl. You're fine. They're in prison, they'll be friendly if they want out.
"Lieutenant Anthon Cerr," the dark green salarian answered, pushing himself to his feet. "STG,"
"So you know Mat'al then?" I asked. Anthon stared at me for a time. "He's... my trainer," C'mon, Dell, pull yourself together! My hands rubbed together to give them something to do.
"You are Delern's student? I heard he found someone who impressed him enough but I didn't think..." Anthon said.
"That it would be human," I finished. Anthon nodded.
"No insult intended, you must be skilled if you impressed him. Why are you here though? Last I heard, you were on a mission to Noveria, then he lost track of you," he crossed his arms, looking curious. A flush grew.
"Well... you can tell him I'm fine and I'll be in contact soon," I waved a hand, trying not to flush. My eyes scanned the door area, trying to find an unlock button or... something. A small keypad highlighted beside the door, hidden behind a panel. My fingers tapped at the buttons, praying the code was simple. The doors parted. The salarians jumped up, scurrying out, reaching for panels hidden in the walls. They pulled armour and weapons free. While they got themselves suited up, I returned to Raisha, watching her as she shook her head.
"Leaving has just gotten more complicated..." she sighed. My eyes found the dead krogan. What relation he had been to the krogan? This wasn't the time for tears.
"We'll think of... something," I said. My eyes glanced to Anthon and his team as they tried to brief themselves. They shifted back to Raisha. While Raisha had given me reason to abandon her, she had… helped somewhat. "Give me a minute," I said. Raisha turned to watch me as I jogged over to Anthon and his team. A few of the salarians, some from other cells, glanced at me.
"Lieutenant," I called. Anthon looked up.
"Yes, Shaik?" he asked, checking his gun over.
"Do you or your men know how to pilot a ship?" I asked. Anthon's grin was slow.
"It's an essential part of STG training," he said me. A nervous cough freed itself, that was something to look forward to as well then.
"These krogan are trying to return to Tuchanka and I'm trying to get back the STG station near Sur'Kesh," I explained. Or anywhere that wasn't here, I'd be happy with that! "Can you fly us there?" Anthon studied me for a time. He nodded.
"If you help us escape, then you have yourself a deal," he held a hand out. We shook hands, a grin on my face. "Although we will need to go to the Citadel first. The krogan can get a shuttle to Tuchanka there," he said. I nodded. Anything to get off this rock! But then my thoughts turned to the Locust, the Carnifex, the omni-tool. The bolts could be replaced. My lungs dragged a breath in. There was one last thing to do before we could evacuate, or me at least. There was no choice if I didn't want to lose them.
"I have... some business to take care of first. We'll help you out, then meet somewhere for pick-up," My breath held, waiting. How would he react? To my relief, the salarian nodded.
"Get us outside and we can find transport. We'll pick you up when you're ready," he said.
"Brilliant, let's get out of here," I said. Anthon clicked his gun, pointing it to the ceiling.
"Let's move out!" He called. My head turned to the female krogan behind me.
"Come on! The salarians will pilot us out of here!" I said. Raisha smiled, a gentler smile than before. She rallied her females and we following the salarians through the base.
They had omni-tools, so it much easier for them to navigate this place than we had. We turned corners and strode down corridors, we found no resistance and made good time. The STG teams were always efficient. They got the job done. Anthon held plenty of leadership talent. He meandered his team through the compound, he watched the six and making sure we were safe. Well, the krogan anyway. He seemed to trust my ability to keep myself alive. It was a welcome sensation to have that level of independence. But, like most missions, a few potholes always littered the road.
We were so close to the outside. We had gone as far as exiting the building, yet tall walls of metal penned us within the compound like a prison. Then we ran through a massive gate designed for tanks, stumbling across a welcome – and unwelcome – sight. Saren and his geth walking down off a walkway. Once my gaze locked with his, all confidence in demanding my weapons back vanished. The indoctrinated turian gazed at me, at the team around me. Anger radiating off him, my skin crawled as it sensed it from here. It was like approaching a burning bonfire. He finished his descent, stopping several tens of metres away from us. The geth held their guns up as we pointed our own back.
"I am seeing why Nyryntha is having such problems with you," he growled. Great, even my Reaper status couldn't help me now! "I have an army preparing to attack me and you are dwindling my resources!"
Come on, Dell, think. My teeth grit. You have a gun, you have 13 krogan behind you, 9 salarians beside you. What could he do? Shoot me? Well, who hasn't shot at me yet? The bullet wounds on my skin were my medals. They did not kill me. Reveal he revealed my connection to the Reapers? Well, who knew about the Reapers, who would believe him? They knew Saren was insane... more or less. My breathing eased. Just try it. For God's sake, Dell, just try it!
"Saren," I said, listening to my voice steady itself. My imagination put Val at one end of the geth's gun, the threat of a bullet through the back of the head wasn't a pleasant thought. But it helped steel my nerves. "You will return my weapons or I'm turning your face into my personal dance floor. Your head is big enough for it!" There, only the slightest of quivers. My muscles tensed for the laugh.
To my surprise, he snarled, drawing my Locust and aiming it at me. My vision turned red. He was touching my gun. He was getting his indoctrinated filth all over my gun, a gift, a symbol of my growth. My finger pulled the trigger, several times. Most bounced off his shields, but one broke through. The bullets nailed him in the shoulder, watching him drop the Locust into the water around our feet. The geth opened fire as shotguns – and heaven knows what else – deafened me.
Saren jumping back behind his geth as he tried to recover from the bullet wound. Everyone else dived for cover behind the metal half-walls. Well, when I say everyone, I meant everyone but me and the geth. The geth clicked in surprise when charged at them, swerving to avoid the bullets. My pathetic shields had to hold until they were close enough. They held long enough for me to shoot a geth's head off and use the remains of the body as a shield. The body wouldn't last long, not under the hail of bullets. Raisha called out, calling me back to take cover. But the STG team suspected this would happen. Another geth near me collapsed, so the new fallen husk became my new shield, the old one vanished under the water.
One of the female krogan cried out. Either one had been shot or killed. My jaw tightened as my legs pressed onwards. I rolled away again, shooting a geth until it vanished in the water. That was when my Locust pressed under my shoulders mid-roll. Well, my hand found it faster than a roadrunner high on caffeine. To feel the Locust back in my grip. Well, my confidence bounded skywards, it was time to take on some geth.
Then the krogan appeared. That forced me to dance around geth and krogan. One krogan tried to charge me. My body swayed out of the way of the charge but get shot in the back as my shields evaporated. The wound burned, but my Locust aimed at the krogan as he spun. A biotic blue surrounded him and he slammed to the ground. My eyes flew, staring over to Raisha as the biotic hue vanished from around her. She cocked the shotgun as a few more charged the females. My attention couldn't stay on her long, she could handle herself. Another geth fell to me as I charged after Saren, trying to clamber up to the walkway. The STG distracted the remaining geth.
He spun on the stairs, pulling my Carnifex out to shoot me. Saren never even got it straight. He had used my Locust, my gut expected the Carnifex would be next. My Locust fired, wishing it held more kick to knock those shields out. He fired the gun but with tens of bullets flying at his face, he shot wide. My legs ran up the stairs, tackling him to the metal. Saren snarled as he punched me, another new pain to strike off the bucket list. One of my hands fumbled to hold one of his limbs, the other was trying to free my equipment. A loud splash sounded below me, the Carnifex had slipped through the stairs, but my hand grabbed my omni-tool ring. My face was purple by the time a handful of bolts fell into my possession and pushed myself off him. I tumbled down the stairs and splashing in the water.
My eyes couldn't see straight, the landscape waving with my battered brain. The bracelet snapped on my wrist, but only after snapping the Locust to my hip. The STG team provided cover fire for me. My hand stretched out to find the stairs. Once it felt the stairs, I crawled around them, trying to find the Carnifex. By the time my hand found it, Saren had retreated from the field, going to nurse his wounds. The Phalanx away, replacing it with the Carnifex. All I held was a handful of bolts and a bruised face. Something grabbed my arm, dragging me up. My strength waned, knees struggling to push me up.
"We need to move before reinforcements arrive. We lost two of the females, a salarian too," Anthon's voice rang in my ear. "Come on, human!" he urged. My shaken legs stumbled after him, following his vague shape as my balance struggled to keep me upright, vision swimming.
"We have a docking bay over here!" a faint salarian voice rang out. "Move!"
Everything blurred after that. Anthon dragged me through the water to the ship. My legs made me walk like a drunk puppy as Raisha fell in at my back. The remaining females and the salarians behind them. A small ship used for covert missions and the clang of the hatch opening. They hurled my ass inside, eager to sit down and collapse in a corner. The last thing I remembered before unconsciousness found me was the sound of an engine roaring. That and a hard cushion of a lumpy chair burning my back.