"Engines 1, 3 through 6 are nominal, engine 2 is stable, electrics are… survivable," Mari said, her voice droning in the background while my mind wandered.
Silence greeted my snort. My aching back pressed into the chair, eyes dancing over the dozen of screens hovering before me. Two hours and the caffeine that kept my so awake during the turian inspection team waned. Not much longer to stabilise the Starquake before Una and Kai took over for the skeleton shift. And the ship still needed a few tweaks to keep it in orbit. My talon tapped the arm of the chair, waving my mandibles my other hand twitched a few dials, the ship almost groaning in response. My eyes narrowed at the steering delays. What the hell screwed with the controls? She'd been acting up since the Normandy shelled the dock in Kahje and freed us. At least in space, the steering difficulties were minimal, atmosphere flying had taxed my knowledge of the ship and flying in general. Everything felt heavy and sluggish, just… horrible! Where was my lovely ship? Not that I would say it aloud with Dell nearby.
Speaking of which… My eyes drifted over my shoulder towards human in the captain's chair. Her head rested on a propped up knuckle, eyes shut as her arm inched ever closer to falling off the arm. How long would it take before someone poked the sleeping bear and told her to go to bed? With the Normandy and its commanding officer departed for more adventures, Dell rid herself of her problems with a glass or two of liquor in her system while waiting for the ship to enter orbit and for the inspection team to 'request' permission to board. Saere pleaded for immediate RIT after her terrifying tumble through space, fearing the worst. It gave Saere time to assess her physical wellbeing while RIT saw to her mental wellbeing. Dell wasn't in any position to argue, even if she could. After Val dragged her back onboard, he had to carry her from the shuttle deck to med bay, she couldn't move or speak or stop shaking. Saere pried her fingers off his carapace and even then she had to give her a pillow to cling to stop her scrambling for something else. Despite her RIT giving her time and her reactions to the procedure now mild compared to her first experience, she still threw up every time. She was the only crew member who vomited during RIT now.
With Dell asleep, the rest of the crew on the brink of collapse and the Starquake's at least stable, footfalls echoed behind me. A turian cruiser glided past the cockpit window as the chair spun, my eyes captured by the glittering hull. The ship returned to its patrol as we orbited a blue gas giant in the system, far from the colony. Before approaching the system, the turians sent a small strike team to assess us, as everyone did when we requested protected orbit. The commander raised a brow at our sleepy, young captain, sweated under the four Spectres and shuffled at our Council founded status. They left soon enough, Dell's policy of 'be polite, give them what they want and they'll leave quicker' worked like a charm. The turian fleet would keep us safe for the next few hours. Una and Kai entered the cockpit, ready to take the nightshift. The pale purple asari smiled as my legs stretched, easing off my chair to give control. Kai patted Mari's shoulder from the corner of my eye. Mari managed a delicate smile, pushing herself off her chair with heavy limbs. My shoulders creaked after a quick stretch.
"We're in protected orbit so we shouldn't have to move. Call if anything happens though, the controls are sluggish, you'll need to shove it around more than usual," I said. Una nodded as she assessed the screens herself.
"Let us hope we do not need to change location until you have had your beauty sleep," Una said, a smile rolling on her face. My head shoot, ignoring the asari as she ruined the chair's configuration for herself. Mari pressed her hands to her lower back and stretched as we left the cockpit. Mari left my attention as she strode towards the elevator but my eye drifted down to the captain's chair, the human asleep on the job. A quick glance around said no one wanted to face her cranky wrath.
"Who has the unenviable job of taking our sleeping captain to her room?" I asked.
"Bagsy not me!" Conner called as he passed the Control Ring. My mandibles flared, gagging.
"I ain't doing it! She'll bite my head off if she wakes up!" I snapped.
"Then don't yell over her head," Shayan laughed from the starboard side. My mandibles snapped to my cheeks as the quarian scurried over, not the least bit afraid of the potential beast between us. "I'll take her up, she never yells at me anyway," Shayan said as he shuffled his arms under Dell's knees and behind her back, hoisting her up with care. Dell murmured but didn't stir, falling back under sleep's control. Tension eased out of my chest as the quarian trotted off, the rest of the crew giving them a wide berth. A cranky Dell was a violent Dell. All the crew members had learned that lesson by now.
"I'm surprised you didn't offer to take her up, XO," I said, turning to the silent krogan within the Control Ring. Raisha paused, pondering my words before heaving a heavy sigh.
"I believe Endellion and I need space, Lanster," Raisha said. "She… appears to dislike my recommendations,"
"Well to be fair, your recommendations tend to sound like orders and then you scold her when she doesn't," I said with a shrug. Raisha glanced over her shoulder with stern eyes. Every muscle in my back stiffened.
"Endellion and I are not military, Flight Lieutenant. Hard and fast rank is not second nature to us," Raisha sighed.
"Right… I'm going to pull you up on that one," I rumbled, hackles fighting to rattle. "First, it's Flight Lieutenant Commander and second, I'm swore sure Dell was in the military once. I think it was called the Alliance, or you can count the STG in a way," I drawled, keeping my tone dry. Raisha stared, controlling whatever stormed within her. She breathed, releasing a slow breath.
"Yes, yes she was," Raisha said, drifting with distraction. My eyes narrowed, flicking over the krogan's tense shoulders, bagged eyes and more than a few wrinkles. My mandibles relaxed.
"XO, my recommendation? Take a break while we're on shore leave. You are stressing too much over Dell. She's not pathetic," I said. Raisha weighed my words, taking slow, deliberate breaths. She nodded.
"Perhaps. I… could use time to visit family on Tuchanka," she said, rubbing her eyes with a hand. "Perhaps that will settle the tensions between us,"
"Maternal instincts are hard to shake," I agreed, if only to keep the peace. Raisha hmmed in agreement.
"I will think on it. Thank you, Lanster. Please go and rest. We will need you sharp to get us to the Citadel," Raisha said.
"Aye, Aye, XO," I saluted, leaving the krogan in peace before leaving bridge.
All the rooms in the combat department lay in darkness, no one was doing tests or monitoring systems. The odd skeleton crew member would poke their heads in, check all the weapons were ready for arming and systems were functioning but otherwise left it be. The med bay section was always open, although Etal was in to let Saere rest. In the third hall, Val stepped into the elevator, turning to lean on the wall after pushing a button. Our eyes met, Val starting as he took notice and threw his arm between the closing the doors. The metal thudded and parted. A tired smile spread on my lips.
"Shayan is taking Dell's to her room by Shayan. Brave bastard," I chuckled. Val shook his head.
"Hey, besides me, Indira, Mat'al and Raisha, who else is willing to piss her off?" he asked. Alright, fair point. "How's the ship?" he asked, stepping out the elevator as Anthon and Seth stepped in. The door closed behind him.
"Heavy, something's screwed up the steering. Expect a slow docking into the Citadel," I sighed, rubbing my eyes. "I blame that dock-side cannon, the ship hasn't flown right since. How is the ground crew?" Val scrunched up his plates as he glanced further up the hall back towards med bay.
"Messed up. Searte is down until her implants settle, Cathleen is out for the next few days due to a sprained wrist and even Rosmani is out for the next week at least with that fractured knee. Thank the spirits we have the tech on the Citadel to heal these things. Dell's under observation for the next 4 days and Indira will be out until she gets hospital treatment," Val said, shoulders sagging. "I'm almost glad we got damaged and need a port, it'll give us time to get our crew back on their feet,"
"Oi, don't talk about my ship like that," I said, Val laughing at my frown and Dell's reaction. She was protective of her ship. "How is Indira? I haven't seen her yet," Val shrugged, but his mouth twisted down too much.
"Quiet. Not as quiet as when Sershin died but all the same," Val said. My mandibles sagged.
"It took us weeks to get her to say something," I said, the memories of prison rising like phantoms. Sitting in those tiny cells, calling out to each other to keep insanity at bay. Despite everyone's best efforts, her voice never sounded. 3 weeks of tension burst free when she spoke. When she cracked a joke, tears rolled down my cheeks. Val nodded.
"Yeah. I doubt she's asleep. Dell sat with her for a bit but she's dead after the RIT. Maybe you can cheer her up," Val said. My brow plates rose, mandibles flared.
"Think she'd want to?" I asked. Val shrugged.
"If not you, then very, few other people would be above you," he said. "Anyway, I need to check on Gideon, Dell's in no position to be checking if he's in bed," he shook his head, recalling the elevator. A sly smile lifted my lips.
"Have Mat'al do it, that'll get him to bed," I suggested. Val stuck his tongue out.
"I want him to sleep, not have nightmares," he rumbled. He frowned at my laugh, a tremor running his hi spine.
"Sleep tight, we've got an interesting ride back to the Citadel," I called. Val snorted as the doors hid him from view. My eyes drifted over my shoulder, towards the med bay. Indira would need the company, she always hated being alone, but at this time? She'd be asleep with luck. Well, couldn't hurt to check at least. My shoulders rolled, walking back up the hall to med bay.
If only the doors weren't automatic. Old fashioned doors had a certain level of sneakiness, not something modern doors could mimic. The darkened med bay also meant a peek through the window wouldn't say if Indira was asleep or not. The door received a scowl as it closed behind me, the smell of antiseptic wafting up like an unwanted friend. No turning back now. Out of the 8 beds available in the short stay room, only one held someone. The other injuries didn't require overnight watch or a medical bed, that and Rosmani refused to lie down anyway. Indira was infamous for her snoring but the quiet room shuddered my spine. Indira lay in the second bed on the left, next to the door to Saere's office. Through the wall, Etal sat at the desk, light leaking in from the office. Despite my best attempts to sneak, Indira shuffled, poking her head over her shoulder towards me. Well, there goes the element of surprise.
"You'd make a terrible infiltrator," she murmured. A smile tugged my lips. At least she was speaking.
"Hey now, I'm just out of practice!" I joked. Indira sighed, turning back to the face the port wall. "How are you feeling, baby blue?" Indira flicked a small smile as the chair creaked under my weight beside her.
"You ever feel like there's no one you can trust?" she asked. My plates furrowed, stomach bubbling. Well, here we go
"That's the Reapers' weapon, nothing is sacred to them. They'll use anything and everything against us, pin us with our own fears and trust only to twist the knife," I said. Indira stayed silent, chewing her lip. My eyes trailed over the cast encasing her hips, a bulge on the sheets over her. "You want to talk about what happened?" Indira's brows upturned.
"I dunno," she said. My mandibles sagged. "I mean, I don't… I don't even know why it bothers me so much. We weren't that close. We dated for a week at best but it turned into a booty call on both our parts after that,"
"Guy you met in a bar on a mission?" I asked, wishing the Starquake hadn't held my attention so much before everything went to hell. Indira smiled, albeit a weak one.
"Drensos was a childhood friend, I suppose. Friend, rival… I guess they mean the same thing. We caused trouble for each other more than anything else though. I can't… he stabbed me. If I hadn't seen the omni-blade and moved, I would have been… been…" she trailed off, rubbing her chest.
"Hey, that wasn't your friend," I said, fighting to keep the sting of my words with a gentle tone. Indira turned, glistening blue eyes in the dim light. "Your friend wouldn't stab you. That was just a shell, a mindless Saboteur controlled husk. The Saboteur killed him and manipulated his body," Indira blinked, eyes drifting away.
"Yeah, I guess he was," she sighed before rolling onto her back. "And here I thought losing Sershin was enough reason to hate the Reapers,"
"To be fair, that wasn't the Reaper's fault. That was the Council," I said, picking my words. Indira lifted a weak smile.
"As if we needed more reason to hate the Council," she corrected. A cheeky grin rose to my lips before I could stop it.
"Dell's the one who has to deal with them, not us. Good for us," I said. Indira managed a weak laugh.
"Thank the Gods for that. I don't think I could take that amount of crap. I don't know how Dell does it," Indira said, shaking her head. "She's got bigger things to worry about though,"
"We can both agree there," I said, leaning on the bed. "I'm glad to see you're still talking though. A little bird told me you were being quiet," Indira rolled her eyes.
"Maybe if Val could keep a conversation going without sliding into blunt observations and mindless dick swinging then maybe I wouldn't," she said. Laughter bubbled from my throat.
"Aw c'mon, you know him. Unless he's making fun of you, he doesn't know what else to do with you," I said. A small smile flitted on her lips.
"He needs to get laid," she said, snuggling back into the pillow with a wince. "Bad,"
"Pfft, good luck. Iona's been flirting but he isn't noticing her," I sighed. Indira grinned.
"He's got his eyes on something more… exotic," she said, drawling her tone as her eyes hooded. My grin dropped, brows furrowing. An opportunity presented itself.
"Raisha?" I asked. Indira's eyes bugged, a hand smacking over her mouth to muffle the surprised laughter. Her eyes trailed over the window where Etal sat, ignoring us if she knew we were here. Indira's attention returned to my cheeky grin. She composed herself enough to speak.
"Ok, when I said exotic I didn't mean fantasy," she said, her tone pitching as she fought for control. My back pressed into the chair, a smug smile warming my chest. It didn't take much to cheer this drell up. "I was thinking someone a bit squidgier," My eyes lit up, a grin fighting to peek through my mask of innocence.
"Well they say opposites attract, I wasn't expecting Mat'al though," I said. Indira's hands clamped over her mouth, furious giggles desperate to escape. Without the cast on her hip, she'd be a giggling ball on the floor. She pulled her eyes up, tears in her eyes.
"I would pay to see that," she squeaked. Another laugh escaped, this time earning a stare from Etal in the office next door. She scowled, my lips pressed together to stop more laughter. My elbows pressed back on the bed.
"Knew I could make you laugh," I said, winking. "You're too easy," Indira's expression changed, the laughter giving way to intrigue as a different sparkle glittered in her eye.
"Oh? I am?" she drawled. My brow plates dropped, mandibles flaring. She leaned close, spreading a wide, sly grin on her face. "Is that coming from experience or does your mug drive all the ladies away?" My back snapped straight, plates flying up and mandibles flapping. Ah, so… fuck, I guess I… well what a nice, awkward situation this turned into. How to dig myself out of this hole?
"Hey now, I've gotten quite a few birds with this face. Have you seen this crest?" I asked, running my hand over said crest. Indira's expression brightened.
"That tiny, shunted thing sticking out the back of your head?" she asked.
"Oh? And you have something better?" I asked. Indira smoothed her expression, hooding her eye as she leaned closer. My muscles tightened, holding themselves still to keep the mask of calm. Two can play at this game; who would crack first?
"Silly little Lanster. You think you can best me in this little game? Just look at me, you ain't got anything better than this," she purred, a finger tracing down over her hip. A brow plate flicked up, making a pointed stare to the cast at her hip before returning. A hair of hesitation, that's all I need.
"Oh, I noticed," I said. "And it is a lovely view. I imagine it'll be even better while I'm tapping it," Indira's eyes widened, her lips spread wide. A heartbeat. "But little miss perfect isn't so perfect. There's no way you can handle this much turian like this," The grin spread wide on my face, tapping the cast on her hip. Indira drew her lips to form a small 'o', a glimmer of mischief smoothing her expression.
"Oh, you chancer," she hushed, closing the already tiny distance even further. "There is only one thing to do with someone like you," My expression stayed light and amused, but mentally prepared for a biotic throw across the room. Her lips touched mine, a gentle invasion. My mandibles flared, resolve failing, my composed expression. "Then I had best heal so I can... sample your supposed prowess," she grinned.
"Oh you cruel, twisted creature," I breathed. Indira stared, wide smile and those blue eyes staring under those brooding eyelids... "I'll be holding you to that," Indira smiled.
"Oh, so am I," she said. "Now let me sleep. Oh and get us to the Citadel soon. After all, the sooner I get treatment…" A pained moan escaped, discomfort aching from uh… another department.
"Fuck, you are manipulative," I said. Indira grinned, watching me stand on trembling knees. "You little madam, will regret toying with me," Indira laughed.
"We'll see, we'll see oh mighty Flight Lieutenant Commander," she leaned back on the bed, following my progress with those eyes. One final glance at the drell gifted me with a wink before the doors closed. My head shook hard. I needed a cold shower. Now.
One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Sev-… en. Eight.
The thump of my heart thrilled in my ears, blood bouncing through my system. The burn in my arms worsened my mood, the realisation hurting my pride more than the pain. I was out of shape, and every time my arms forced my body off the ground was one small step closer to overcoming that. Not that my body wanted to cooperate though. This last mission proved I had issues, my muscles needed serious toning and just winging it and hoping for the best would not cut it anymore. The Saboteurs weren't playing nice, they wanted me dead. I had to be ready. Thus, the push-ups were the slow, painful start to trying to get myself in a good physical form so long battles didn't push me to the limit and injuries would be easier to handle. With the Starquake flying back to the Citadel – after scolding Lanster for being too reckless with the safety tests before departing protected orbit – my new goal forced myself into a rigorous exercise routine, whether or not I liked it. It wasn't the only change either. Watching Val on the field wasn't cutting it now. Fighting alongside Shepard made me realise how far down the pecking order I should be. He commanded authority and his crew with expert precision, no hesitation and the flexibility I could only dream of. Even Val with all his experience couldn't beat that. When not captaining the ship and crew, people would find me on the battle simulations programs. And goddam it, I gave Raisha the right to kick my ass if I skived. My survival depended on my ability to learn and to learn fast. Twenty-two. Twenty-three. Twenty-four.
"Well this is an unusual sight," A chuckle sounded behind me. My faced contorted, eyes lifting to the mirrored wall before me, spotting a certain dark salarian approach. A sour snort escaped, focusing on the digital numbers on the floor increase with each push-up.
"Shut up, Mat'al. I need to do this," I said, begging my muscles not to break. From my peripheral vision, a foot stopped, crouching before me. My arms quivered, core straining on the way down before fighting to push back up. Pressure on the back of my head stopped that, forcing me deeper towards the ground. My teeth grit.
"Lower than that, Dell, if you want to do something effective," Mat'al said, tone ripe with amusement. My jaw locked, everything trembling as the burning in my arms threatened to push me to the edge. My nose touched the ground, core muscles screaming. It took more energy than predicted to push myself back up. "So what has brought this on, hmm?" Mat'al asked. "Lower. Lower," he pressed. My eyes squeezed together as my arms forced my body up. Diving back down for my second to last push-up, my chest fought to speak.
"I'm pathetic," I said, heaving myself for another push. Mat'al snorted.
"In what way?" he asked. My arms strained under the last push, elbows straightening before flopping face first onto the floor. My lungs heaved, chest aching gasped for air as my arms kicked my face in.
"I can't lead a combat team for shit, I can't do hand-to-hand, my stamina is horrendous and I'm so soft that being thrown around a little kicks my ass. I'm relying on my instincts to keep me alive, not my skills or experience," I said as my legs shuffled under me and my aching arms heaved me upright into a seated position. Mat'al studied me, eyes narrowed. "That can't be the case anymore. The Saboteurs aren't playing nice with me, they don't care about helping Nyryntha win in her battle against me. They are out to kill me," My gaze locked with the cool salarian before me, fighting to control the burning need to work until my body crashed and burned. A tense lump worked its way up my throat "Train me," Mat'al raised a brow.
"I did," he said.
"No," I said. "Not some cheesed up crash course you did for fun. Properly train me! Train me as if I am the next prodigy of the STG!" Mat'al fell still, an iceberg calculating whether to sink me or not.
"So, Feros wasn't enough, hmm?" he mused. My head shook. "You understand that any further training I do will be crueller than Feros, yes?" My throat tightened, emotions swirling out of control in my chest. A sweat threatened to break out.
"I find that hard to believe, but I'm prepared to suffer through it. I need this. This isn't like Feros where you dragged my oblivious ass through it," I said, throat swelling. A wet splat dropped on a clenched fist on the floor, my heart crashing into my chest, muscles too slow and sluggish to hide my face. "I can't keep my head when things go wrong. Val might… Val might not be there all the time either. Dammit, I could've lost everyone on Kahje! If Shepard hadn't been so close... I need this, dammit, I need to do this!" A storm swelled in my chest, raging against the swirl of emotions swallowing me. A tremor shook me, muscles tight and nausea blinding. I was captain, I was in charge, I carried the lives of those around me. That was a mighty weight that my feeble mind stayed away from for fear of breaking. So much depended on me and nothing I did could get me on top of it. The change in Reaper tactics froze my blood on top of it all. Dekuuna set me on this path. It was fight or die, there was no room for mercy on either side. My gaze rose to Mat'al, feeling the storm consume me.
"When we leave the Citadel. I'll take you to an STG training spot. Mercs as far as the eye can see. I'll have a small team met us there. We'll put you through your paces," he said, pushing himself onto his feet. A warming breath leaked from my tender lungs, a flood of relief quietening the turmoil.
"Thank you," I said.
"Now then, 50 jumping jacks, 25 squats, 25 mountain climbers, 30 lunges, plank for 2 minutes and 50 laps around the training room," Mat'al ordered. My jaw dropped. His smile chilled my blood. "Well? You said to train you like the next prodigy of the STG. You are out of shape, so let's get started," he clapped his hands. My feet shambled under me, fearing a pistol appearing in his hand.
"I think I've made a horrible, horrible mistake," I said. Mat'al's smile widened.
"Well, I wouldn't say that. We've still got the actual planetside training to do," he said. A pitiful whimper sounded, eyes on the Predator as he loaded it with air rounds.