Friendly Neighborhood Nine-Tails
Disclaimer: I do NOT own Naruto.
For a trained ninja the trip from Konoha, near the center of the Land of Fire, to any of the country's borders was a trip that most made in the time of two days. One if they needed to reach it in a hurry.
For a Bijuu? It was more of a stroll than anything.
So Naruto was very aware he could run the entire way there in, what? An hour? A few hours, at most?
There was just one problem. Besides possibly causing an earthquake with his running.
No, the main problem was much simpler.
"I thought you said no one lived this way!" Naruto growled out as he glared at the small village.
"No one does, it's an abandoned village," Jiraiya defended from a top Naruto's head.
"Abandoned my ass. I can hear the screaming from here. Could one of you ANBU go down there and calm their asses down?" Naruto requested.
Along with Jiraiya and Kakashi, a dozen ANBU had been sent along to accompany them. Half were currently out, making sure no unlucky travelers got in Naruto's path.
"No offense, Uzumaki, but you do realized that you're not in charge of us, right?" one of the ANBU asked politely.
Kakashi sighed as he knew what was about to happen.
Naruto sat down.
"Brat, what are you doing?" Jiraiya asked in exasperation.
"Waiting on one of you to be an adult and tell these people they're not in danger," Naruto answered simply. "No hurry, I can wait."
"How are you so childish AND responsible?!" Jiraiya asked in disbelief.
"Because you're all being maturely irresponsible? Kakashi-Sensei excluded," Naruto answered.
"Thank you," Kakashi said before turning to the ANBU. "But he's right, one of you should go and let them know they're safe."
"I'll go," one of the ANBU volunteered before jumping off.
"Thank you, Tiger," Naruto said, rising back up and continuing his way south. "Okay, does anyone else besides the pervert know where we're going? Cause I'm losing faith in these directions by the minute."
"I told you, we're not lost! Look, you can see Mount Xilasha, right over there!" Jiraiya said, pointing to a mountain off to the east.
Naruto turned to look at it...and kept looking at it.
"You okay, Naruto?" Kakashi asked curiously.
"Yeah, just memorizing it. I'm half expecting us to end up going in a circle. Seriously, why are we not going in a straight line?" Naruto asked with a sigh.
"Because that WOULD take you in distance of at least three major cities," Jiraiya explained with a sigh. "Just bear with it, Naruto. And just think about having a massive beach all to yourself."
"I am. This is the most I've moved since I got this body," Naruto said, shrugging his shoulders and popping his spine for effect.
"Ow!" one of the ANBU said, rubbing his ear. "Okay, did not think about how loud that would be. Sounded like a tree snapping next to me."
"Really?" Naruto asked, more to himself than to those on his back.
"Naruto, do not start popping your knuckles and fingers, please," Kakashi requested.
"I didn't say anything!" Naruto defended quickly.
"You were thinking it," Kakashi retorted knowingly.
The smallest lowering of Naruto's ears told them that was indeed the case.
Soon enough, they were on the path again, heading southwards. Naruto glanced around all the while, taking in the sight and sounds. He hadn't been down south too many times. Most of his missions had been headed in...any other directions, actually. And being a giant fox certainly gave him an interesting point of view. And as many people were terrified as they watched him passing though, many more were just staring off in wonder and awe. He suppose he couldn't blame them, it wasn't every day a Kyuubi just strolled through.
"So, how are they taking it?" Naruto asked curiously.
"Who are they and what is it?" Jiraiya asked without missing a beat.
"It is me. They would the other villages," Naruto explained.
A short silence came over the group, Kakashi and Jiraiya sharing a neutral look while the ANBU refused to speak.
"I'm not the sharpest kunai in the pouch," Naruto admitted. "But you don't need to be a genius to know that me being...this would get a lot of attention."
"I'm surprised you didn't already know, with these great ears of yours," Kakashi mused, glancing to the one he was nearest.
"It gets hard, sorting through what everyone says. Some of you are speculating, some are you are delivering news," Naruto said. "And I doubt it's something you need to keep quiet about. So, spill."
"Suna is happy you weren't like this during the Chunin exams," Jiraiya answered. "No idea about Kiri. They're still a mess. Iwa and Kumo? They're more than a little spooked."
"I can only imagine," Naruto said under his breath.
"You happy about that?" the sage asked with a raised eyebrow.
Naruto sighed. "I'm not happy or unhappy about it. I'll be happy or unhappy when I find out what they decide what to do about it."
"You really are thinking ahead," Kakashi observed to himself.
"Kind of have to. All my plans and dreams kind of went up in smoke," Naruto reminded bitterly.
"Naruto..." Jiraiya said in sympathy.
"Shut it. I'm not going to cry about it again or anything," Naruto said firmly. "Just need to figure some things out for myself."
In relative silence later, the beach was in sight.
"There we are, the Kaberan, the Wall of the Flood!" Jiraiya said, pointing to a line of massive stone pillars along the beach.
"The what now?" Naruto asked curiously.
"There's an old myth the gods made a massive damn to hold back the sea when it tried to flood the world," Kakashi explained.
"Neat," Naruto said as they got closer, the pillars becoming larger and larger. Eventually, he was a bit dumbfounded as he realized the stone formations were actually insanely massive. "Wow! I almost forgot what it was like looking up at something," he exclaimed, staring up at the pillars. They were wider than his body and at least three times as tall.
"And you doubted my sense of directions," Jiraiya said smugly.
"Why have I never heard of this place? Seems like a great tourist spot," Naruto mused.
"You'd think, but it's pretty hard to get to for the average person. All the ports for trading and fishing are elsewhere, so no one's bothered to invest into the area," Kakashi explained.
Naruto just stared for a bit longer as they passed by one of the pillars, making their way onto the beach proper.
It was a massive stretch. Not counting his tails, his whole body could reasonably lay on most of it if he wanted to just bath in the sunlight. The water stretched on for miles into the horizons, with only a few small rock formations out in the sea. The sun shined against the surface, giving Naruto a beautiful first look at his new place.
"...I think I'm going to like it here," Naruto mused absently.
"Good to hear," Jiraiya said as the ANBU started to jump off of the Bijuu's back. "While you get settled in, we're going to set up a parameter."
"...Wait, am I getting sealed in here?" Naruto asked pointedly.
"No, you'd probably rip through it on accident," Jiraiya said factually. "It's just a Genjutsu barrier, something that'll keep most people from wandering in here."
"Ahh, fair enough." Naruto said as the sage jumped away. "Now, let's see how this turns out."
"How whaaaAAAAT!?" Kakashi asked, only for Naruto to leap forth into the ocean.
"Shit! Everyone! Off the beach!" Jiraiya called out a miniature tsunami suddenly crashed onto the beach and into the trees.
The water turned and bulged from the sudden dive bomb, leaving Kakashi standing on top of the water, his hair flopping down from the wetness. "I should have known he'd do that," Kakashi scolded himself in resignment.
"Kakashi! Everything okay out there!?" Jiraiya yelled from the beach.
"Yeah, just a bit water logged!" Kakashi answered with an eye smile.
"I mean Naruto!" Jiraiya reiterated. "Does he even known how to swim anymore?!"
"Good question!" Kakashi said, pointing off to the side. "You should ask him!"
"Huh?" Jiraiya looked over and saw that, down the beach was indeed a giant fox pulling himself out of the water.
Naruto spat out enough water to fill a lake before making a hand sign, his body engulfed in golden chakra. It settled, revealing his fur once more dry and shining in the sun. "Well, I can't swim yet, but I don't need to breath underwater," Naruto mused as he pulled some coral out of his hand's fur, tossing it into the sea.
"Naruto, what the hell were you thinking?" Jiraiya asked as she stood in front of the Kyuubi.
In response, Naruto turned his head and allowed a bit of water to pour of his ear, almost soaking Jiraiya.
"Hey, watch it!" the toad sage snapped
"I was watching. I missed," Naruto said with a smirk. "As for what I was thinking? I wanted to know what being a wet fox felt like. Answer? Not too different from being a wet human."
"I'm glad that important question was answered," Jiraiya said with an eye roll.
"That and I wanted to go fishing," Naruto added on.
"Fishing," Jiraiya repeated.
"Well, more like whaling I guess," Naruto said, scratching his forehead. "I just want to taste something at this point."
"I...okay, I can understand that," Jiraiya accepted. "So, think you'll like it here?"
"Beach, possibly food, lots of space to myself, and I don't have to worry about hurting anyone when I try training with this body?" Naruto listed off with a small smile. "It's perfect."
Meanwhile
"Good riddance."
Sakura couldn't help glaring whenever she heard someone muttering about being glad that Naruto was gone. Yes, some of them were legitimately not malicious. Like the ones who couldn't sleep well at night, or at all during the day with Naruto's voice. Others were just glad not to hear every instant of Naruto's life being heard across the village.
But then there were the ones that had just hated the sight of him and thought he was still a monster.
"Let it go, Sakura," Shikamaru said with a sigh. "Not worth getting worked up over."
"We're not kids in an academy anymore, Shikamaru," Sakura said with a frown. "We don't have the luxury of being stupid and not notice everything wrong with how people treated Naruto."
"You're so troublesome. Clobbering everyone that bad mouths him isn't going to do you or Naruto any favors," Shikamaru countered.
"Makes me feel better sometimes," Sakura said under her breath.
"You've been really protective of him since he got furry," Choji said curiously.
Sakura noted to herself that she was still not use to seeing Choji so thin, even if he was steadily getting his weight back. "You both do remember that breakdown he had, right?" Sakura asked with a frown.
"Yeah, don't remind me," Shikamaru said with a sigh. "That was just...sad."
"If Naruto needs to be snarky to cope, I'm all for it. I hate seeing the guy sad like that," Choji said with a frown.
"But do you remember what he said?" Sakura pressed. "He said he died, you two. Sasuke killed him, and he came back like this. If not for a freak accident, he'd be gone."
They both turned very grim at that. They were ninja; they knew dying on the mission was always a possibility. But they had avoided experiencing that loss just yet. And to imagine Naruto of all people being the first to go of their generation, it was just disheartening.
"So, you nearly lost him, got him back on a miracle, and realized you needed to be a better friend to him?" Shikamaru summarized.
"What, should I have been a bitch and tried to clobber him for not doing a better job of bringing Sasuke back?" Sakura asked sarcastically.
"Oh please, you were never that bad," Choji said with a chuckle.
"Look, Naruto's my friend and he's in...a weird place right now that I can't even begin to comprehend," Sakura said with a sigh. "I'm just trying to help and now I'm realizing how shitty some of the people in this village are."
"I think you need a hobby," Choji said suddenly.
"What?" Sakura asked blankly.
"Well, Naruto's got his own place now," Choji mused. "So you could probably use something to do instead of just worrying about him all the time."
"Choji's right. Flattered as Naruto would be, he definitely wouldn't want you worrying about him all the time. He's a big fox; he can take care of himself. Most of the time," Shikamaru agreed.
Sakura sighed. "I know. I've just been waiting for Naruto's situation to get...resolved, I guess? I know I need to start taking my training more seriously," Sakura said, cupping her chin. "Just need to figure out who can training me."
"What about Kakashi? He's still your Sensei, right?" Shikamaru reminded.
"Yes, but he's unofficially on "Fluffy duty" when needed. You know, since he's about the only adult that seems to understand Naruto. Well, him and Iruka, but he has his own little monsters to watch after," Sakura said in jest. "I was thinking about asking Lady Tsunade, but..."
"But?" Choji prompted.
"Well, with the entire Naruto situation, she might be a bit too busy to take on an apprentice," Sakura mused with an awkward smile.
"You're not wrong. I can only imagine the headache this has been for the higher ups, let alone the paperwork," Shikamaru agreed, leaving it unstated how much concern this might cause for other nations.
"But in the meantime, I still should get back to training," Sakura said, looking to the empty spot above the Hokage monument. "I do wonder what he's up to right now though."
"Maybe he went fishing?" Choji suggested.
"For what, a whale?" Shikamaru asked, smirking with a laugh.
Meanwhile
"You caught a whale."
It was mostly just an observation from Kakashi, looking at the huge carcass Naruto had literally dropped onto the beach.
"Look, I haven't tasted ANYTHING in a week. At this point, I'm willing to give this a try," Naruto said as he placed a hand on his kill, before giving Kakashi a cautious look. "Unless you want to explain whale blood on your uniform, you might want to stand back."
Kakashi decided to take that advice, body flickering a small distance away as Naruto sunk his fangs into the aquatic beast, blood spattering out as he ripped out a mouthful.
"You know?" Naruto started as he carefully chewed the meal. "It's not great, but it's not as bad as you'd think."
"I'll take your word for it," Kakashi said with an eye smile.
"Wish I knew some fire jutsu. Cooking it might make the taste better," Naruto mused. "Hey, Kakashi, do you...?"
"Well, I could. But I'd probably either use up half my chakra or overcook it. Fire jutsu weren't intended for cooking, after all," Kakashi answered good-naturedly.
"True," Naruto accepted, taking another bite out of the whale.
"You know you can't eat these too often, right? They'd go extinct if you started treating them like ramen," Kakashi cautioned.
"Relax, I'm just going to go for one every week or two. Not like I need to eat as a mass of chakra," Naruto waved off as he used his claws to put a piece of a whale bone from his teeth.
"Glad you're having a good time," Jiraiya said, feigning a sound of exhaustion. "Well, my work here is done!"
"Thank you for setting up my "Keep Out" fence," Naruto said with a chuckle.
"You're very welcome. It's a damn big fence," Jiraiya said, undaunted by the sarcasm. "It goes just beyond the Kaberan. We set up markers on the beach to show how far this all stretches."
"You sure I'll notice them?" Naruto asked, legitimately unsure.
"We had some ANBU that specialized in earth jutsu. It'll be the obvious stretch of flat stone interrupting the beach. Can't miss it," Jiraiya assured confidently.
"How about out there?" Naruto asked, looking out to the sea.
"It'll keep people from coming here as a tourist spot, but you might get some people landing here if they're desperate or something," Jiraiya explained.
"Or if they just wash up, I assume," Kakashi added in.
"That too, yes," Jiraiya answered. "On that note, try to be careful at sea."
"Trust me, learning to water-walk again is second on my to-do list. Right after I learn how to swim again," Naruto said, turning around to glare at his nine tails. "Going to be really awkward with these things."
"Maybe you can use them as a propeller," Kakashi suggested casually.
"..." Naruto stared for a long moment before face-palming. "Why do you put these images in my head? I'm going to be chuckling about that for weeks."
"Glad to be of service," Kakashi joked.
"So, umm, wasn't exactly clear on this part. How many people are going to be here?" Naruto asked curiously.
"One or two. Usually Chunin or Jonin," Jiraiya explained. "I know you probably don't like being watched, but-"
"Like I haven't been stared at for the last week?" Naruto interrupted with a snort. "Its fine, I get it. Tsunade needs to be able to say the village knows where I am."
"Is that maturity or resignation?" Jiraiya asked, cupping his chin.
"There's a difference?" Naruto asked rhetorically.
"He's not wrong," Kakashi said with a sigh. "Well, you'll be happy to know we have first shift."
"We?" Naruto repeated.
Jiraiya shrugged. "I need to make sure the Genjutsu seals work fine while being around you. Kakashi is here because he seems to be the only one you respect."
"No, no, I respect you. And the Old Hag. I just like Kakashi-Sensei more. Him and Iruka-Sensei," Naruto explained honestly.
"Then why do we get the shitty nicknames?" Jiraiya asked with a grumble.
"Yours is just because you are a Pervy Sage," Naruto answered flatly. "Tsunade's? Ehh, Old Drunk feels like too much of a low blow for me. And Old Bitch is a bit too far. Gambling Addict just isn't good enough."
"Huh, you actually put a lot of thought into those nicknames, Naruto," Kakashi said in surprise. "What would you call me than?"
"Scarecrow. Sounds a bit cool, sounds a bit insulting. Fits you perfectly," Naruto answered instantly. "You know my shit childhood. I didn't have a lot of friends, and I had a lot of pent up aggression. So I'd stare out my window and think up nicknames for everyone I met."
"I...okay, point," Jiraiya said, not willing to pull that bandage. "Anyway, I already sent the ANBU back to the village."
"Okay, well, you two can do whatever you want, while I am going to learn to try to learn to water walk again," Naruto said as he walked towards the ocean.
"I thought you were going to learn to swim first?!" Kakashi called out after the Bijuu.
"It's not like I'll drown! I'll practice swimming when I fall through," Naruto said as he placed his furry hand over the water, channeling chakra into it.
Kakashi and Jiraiya were not at all surprised that Naruto accidentally caused a shockwave, sending the water blasting away, forming a perfect circle where the water could not enter, leaving only the sand and sea stones at the bottom.
"...This might be even harder than I thought," Naruto said with a sweat-drop.
"Well, I'm going to go find a place to rest under the shade, a safe distance from here," Jiraiya said, glancing to Kakashi.
"I'll go find a good spot to read, somewhere I can keep my book out of the splash-zone," Kakashi answered.
"You know...I'm failing at this, but it's still kind of fun," Naruto mused as he repeated the process over a deeper spot. "I wonder how far down this can reach...?"
End of Chapter
Naruto's got his new beach home! Don't worry, he's not there permanently. But Naruto needs some place where he can literalyl stretch his limbs and get an iota of time to himself. Oh, and Naruto tasted whale. He doesn't have a lot of options, so he'll take what he can get.
And yeah, while some people were getting use to Naruto as the Kyuubi, others were still the same as ever about hating him. Also threw in a jab at all the funnier Sakura bashing fics that center around Sasuke's retrieval arc. On that note, Sakura might have a different teacher by virtue of Tsunade being busy with the Naruto situation.
Anyway, hope you all got a laugh out of this.
Early viewing of chapters 11-12 avaliable on my pat-reon:
p a treon . com (slash) akumakami64