FLOOD

Kirishima's hair hung black and limp over gaunt cheekbones. Besides him, Mina waved an empty cup and asked, "Could you spare a drop for a thirsty hero?"

The man she asked turned to look at her. His skin turned to dust, and he blew away in the dry wind.

Shoji fashioned his flesh into a sun-hat and stared at the distant horizon. "Not a single update in weeks. Whole town will dry up at this rate."

"We could always move to AO3," Jiro pointed out.

"Bold of you to assume this story's author isn't too lazy to repost over two hundred chapters."

As they mulled over the decrepit state of their metaphorical town, dramatic copyrighted western music played in the background.

Izuku strode into town in knee-high cowboy boots. He adjusted his hat and spat a wad of ferrofluid onto the dusty road.

"I heard you folks had a problem with your updates."

"Oh thank god, finally." Ochako ran up and said, "Please, you have to help us! The river dried up, and no one knows why."

"Rest assured, conventionally attractive female in emotional distress to tug at the audience's heartstrings, I will rectify whatever problem this site has or metaphorically die trying."

Izuku trudged through the dry riverbed, past floundering readers flopping around and gasping for air like stranded fish, until he came upon a stretch of dense woods. Further down, he heard the sound of trickling water and smelled a faint whiff of burnt sugar.

At the end of the river, a massive wooden dam stretched across the countryside. Hordes of beavers dragged fallen trees to it and slapped mud on it with their tails. In the midst of them, wearing a yellow construction hat, a reflective vest, and a thick five o' clock shadow, Bakugo barked orders and shouted at them about meeting deadlines.

"Bakugo. This town ain't big enough for both of us."

"But we aren't even in-" Bakugo shook himself. "Doesn't matter. Take a good look, Deku."

"I have. It's quite impressive."

"Thank you, I-" Bakugo kicked the nearest beaver and shouted, "That's not the point! Your robot takeover is at an end! With ffnet updates disabled, this story will no longer get any traffic. The author will get bored, and the world will end before you enslave humanity!" Bakugo pulled out a pistol. "Now draw, and duel me like a man!"

"Okay." Izuku powered up an energy beam. Bakugo fired, and the bullet dinged off Izuku's forehead. The energy beam streaked past Bakugo and hit the dam. As water swept Bakugo away, he shouted, "You haven't seen the last of me!"

"I know. We have class on Monday."

In town, water rushed into the empty riverbed. Everyone leapt for joy and drank greedily from the flow of updates.

A loud rushing sound made them pause. They looked up, saw the two-hundred email notifications rushing in like a tsunami, and had only a second to scream before the whole town got swept away.

500

So, the sequel to IMEA dropped during the notification black-out and got 150 followers + 100 faves. That, plus all the story updates I missed in two months, plus the other faves, follows, reviews, and PMs I got in that time showing up all at once, and it's a miracle I still have an email account.

Also, this fic just reached its 420th page on the master document containing every drabble. Coincidence? I think NOT!