DST

Izuku said, "You are all one hour late. I will inform Aizawa-sensei that you all require detention."

"An hour late? Izuku, it's eight-thirty."

"My internal sensors indicate the time is currently nine-thirty. Do you have your watch correctly calibrated?"

"The clocks on the wall say eight-thirty too," Kaminari pointed out.

Izuku smashed the clock face and yanked the hour hand into position. "There. I fixed it."

"Hey, Izuku?" Ochako asked. "Did you forget to reset your clock for daylight saving's time?"

Izuku facepalmed hard enough to leave a handprint embedded into his metal cranium. "Ah, I have made an embarrassing gaffe. My mother usually corrects my perception of time. If you don't mind, the manual override is embedded in my back." Izuku opened a hatch on his back, exposing a keypad, a computer screen, and two dualshock controllers.

"Ooh! Let me!" Mina jabbed at the keypad. "Hmm… settings, date and time… aha! Did that work?"

Izuku twitched erratically. A ding like a toaster oven came from inside his head, and his vision went in and out of focus. "Oh, hello everyone. What are you all doing here fifty-seven minutes early?"

"Oh, whoops. Accidentally hit the DST override twice."

Izuku had another mini-seizure and said, "Hello everyone. Nice to see you all on time for classes. I had you filed as tardy an hour in the future, which is clearly an error. I have purged that data."

Before Izuku could close his hatch, Kaminari said, "Wait, what are the advanced settings?"

"Please do not touch those, they have not been-"

Kaminari move the date backwards. Izuku spasmed and said, "What are you doing here on a Sunday? Per school policy, students are not allowed-"

"And to the future!" Kaminari thumbed the day forward button until it hit his birthday. A plume of smoke wafted from Izuku's ears as he said, "Oh, Kaminari. Happy Birthday. Here you go."

He handed Kaminari a PS5. His eyes lit up with greed. "Does this thing have a year slider?"

"Kaminari, no."

"Kaminari yes!"

"Happy bir-"

"At least let me get an early birthday too!"

"Happy happy ha-ha-happy"

"You can have a turn after I get a mountain of swag, okay?"

Izuku shuddered, and a torrent of videogames spilled out of him. As Kaminari kept hitting year forward, Izuku shuddered violently. A loud clanking sound came from inside him. Valves burst, and steam flooded the room. A golden light shone from the heavens, and the mist parted to reveal Half Life 3 crowning the pile.

Kaminari fell to his knees, tears streaming from his eyes. "It's beautiful."

"Happy three-millionth birthday Kaminari!" Izuku blinked. "That's not logically possible. Humanity is supposed to have driven themselves to extinction through global climate change and depletion of natural resources by 2100."

"Uh… what?"

"The only logical explanation is that I have gone insane from loneliness. Hello imaginary friends! I hope your deaths were all pleasant."

Aizawa hit him with a wrench. Izuku blinked. "Oh, hello Sensei. You're right on time."

500

I woke up feeling oddly refreshed and awake one morning. Turns out I had forgotten about DST. My phone didn't.