….

.

…

….

..

…

…

…..

…

…..What is this?...

..

..I-we-we're…

…This is supposed to be over…..

It… It ended. Endless, ended.

…

….

So why are we still going?

.

….

..

…

Total Drama Homespun

…

Camera flashes scream at him as security barely contains the horde of shrieking journalists. The protestors behind them making their voices heard.

He stares straight ahead. His lawyer responding for him.

…

The board room is how he remembers it, truth be told outside a little technological upgrading this sort of space hadn't changed in the last hundred years. The crowd of suits waiting for him look like they've never laughed a day in their lives.

"Mr. O'Gleeson, please sit."

Conner O'Gleeson fills the joyless air with a chuckle. Decades of television production had taught him well that confidence was how you dealt with these sorts of people.

"Gang, I'd love to stay but I'd like to make this quick, you're pulling me away from the afterparty of my first season of Total Drama."

"We aren't here to discuss Endless, that's finished." The Head Producer says sternly. "Now… thanks to you, we have to live with the consequences."

"I thought we talked about that as well?"

The Producer's expression tightens.

"We did. This isn't about that. It's about next season."

"Yeah? What about it?"

"The pitch you gave us… I'm afraid in light of recent events we're going to have to make a few changes."

…

A spotlight shines down on the walls of an old summer camp's main lodge. The photos of the casts of previous Total Drama seasons line the wall. Somewhere from the darkness, an unfamiliar voice begins speaking.

"Total Drama. At this point what's new to say about it? Way, way back in '07 the hottest reality show on television dropped its first season, it's been a long time, but we're still on top."

The light lingers on a new photo. One of a far more colourful cast than the unceasing parade of teen stereotypes before it.

"A couple months ago good old TD actually had its fiftieth season. To celebrate, we cracked open Pandora's Box and brought the full expanse of the multiverse to our audience."

At the end of the room sits a man, the source of this nostalgic speech. He sits there, his back to the wall.

"That season was Total Drama Endless, and Endless was a big departure for old TD. Lot of kind of risky moves let's be honest here. So much so it barely felt like the same show anymore. Which is lame because everyone knows Total Drama was already perfect."

The man chuckles before continuing.

"…So, the studio was brought in to make a few corrections, starting with fixing the most massive problem Endless dared to make…not having enough ME!"

The figure swivels around in their chair. The man's a mid-thirty-something. With wavy black hair, a five O'clock shadow and a teal cargo shirt over a white long-sleeve top.

Chris Mclean the long-time host of Total Drama flashes a million-dollar grin, his dark eyes filled with excitement.

"I'm baaaacck!" He proclaims. "You miss me campers? Who am I kidding of course you did! Let's be real Endless was a decent experiment but Total Drama just isn't Total Drama without yours truly."

He gestures to himself and rises to his feet.

"I've come out of retirement to set this show back on track. And with me at the helm again and now the whole multiverse at my disposal there's an unending supply of poor helpless victims to torture and humiliate on national TV." He laughs joyously. "That's right! No more lame statue hunts, this season's all about the pain, and I know just the place to go for some wicked challenges."

"Alright wait a minute!" Another man runs up to Chris, sounding annoyed.. He's tall, European descent and looks to be somewhere in his late thirties to early forties, there are a few token lines creased into his diamond-shaped face. His hair is a sandy orange colour and reaches down to his chin, which is scruffy with a goatee.

"Let's get something straight before this season kicks off…" Conner O'Gleeson, former host of Total Drama Endless and self-proclaimed God of Late Night Television says.

"…You didn't find diddly squat; this was my pitch. You're just the network addition that got slotted in last minute."

"Yeah, wonder why they did that?" Chris says in a strained tone. He turns to his audience.

"You probably remember Conner from last season. Unfortunately, he'll be sticking around this time as our cameraman."

"Co-host!"

"Whatever. Oh and also Conner's gross henchman Jerry is back."

"His name is Jeremy!"

From the back of the room, what looks to be a large pile of veiny bubble gum with beady eyes and a wide-mouth gurgles.

"Don't take it personally sugarbear. Rise above the hate!" Conner calls back to him.

Chris strolls over to a third man. A middle-aged burly African Canadian.

"Also returning this season, my own personal Jeremy, Chef Hatchet!"

"Don't compare me to the slime monster." Chef grumbles through gritted teeth.

"I hear he's a chef too aren't you Jeremy?"

Jeremy gurgles proudly. Chef gives him a dark look, then starts muttering to himself under his breath.

Chris turns back to the audience.

"Now you're probably wondering what the gimmick is this time around. After travelling around the multiverse last season, I thought it'd be nice if this time around we here at Total Drama return to our roots and settle in somewhere like we used to back at Wawanakwa."

He gestures to the lodge surrounding them.

"…Only we're not doing it at a camp. Chef? If you'd do the honours?"

Chef Hatchet grunts a pulls down on a rope.

The Lodge set collapses revealing their true surroundings. The four of them stand amongst sprawling gardens, behind them a little orange house with stucco walls and red shingles on its roof. Curiously all of this is perched, not on Earth, but a tiny asteroid that would seem claustrophobic to all but the Little Prince.

"This is the house of an interesting guy named Rodney. Yes, you're seeing it right, we are in space, don't ask how we're breathing, I'm told it's not worth worrying about."

The front door clicks open.

"Here's the man of the hour himself!" Chris announces.

From the house comes a dapper red squirrel in half-moon spectacles and a tweed jacket. He smiles serenely at his guests.

"Ah I see our show's ready to begin is it?"

"Just about Rod," Conner says.

"Yes, you're seeing that right," Chris insists, "Rodney is in fact a Squirrel, and if you think that's weird get ready, there's a whole lot more where that came from. Red Rod over here's got a house full of mysteries and me, the gang, and twenty-three new contestants are about to spend a season rooming with them."

"This!" Conner declares. "Is Total! Drama! Homespun!"

"Dude!" Chris snaps. "That was my line!"

"I was the one that came up with the name!" Conner protests.

The two men begin arguing. Jeremy gives a gurgling lament. Chef meanwhile sidelines the camera.

"Stayed tuned folks. This season's gonna be another messy one."

…

We're back ladies and gentlemen.

Welcome everyone to Homespun. If you're new here it's a pleasure to have you. Thanks for clicking on the story, and I hope you stick around. If you're returning, welcome back, it's nice to see you again.

For those not in the know, This isn't Total Drama Homespun's debut on the site, earlier this year it was taken down and rewritten, we already have our cast so apologies to anyone who was considering suggesting characters, the more positive side of things is you'll have about ten episodes out to read by the end of the month.
If you've never read my work before, this story should serve as a good entry point, though knowledge of my last competition fic, Total Drama Endless is obviously a help.

For those of you who are returning after the first draft, firstly, thank you for your patience with me. The deletion of Homespun V1 was rather abrupt and not communicated much outside the TD Crossover Discord server. I'm sure theirs some of you that were surprised to see it go down and, hopefully you're happy to see it back.

With that out of the way let's get on with the show.