Without Adam at the district, the bullpen felt empty. Hailey knew his time off was deserved and the best option, it was just hard to swallow when Jay also wasn't there. Four people didn't make up a unit, but it had to do for now. It meant there was more work for each person, and she left each night feeling mentally and physically exhausted.

She pulled her hair from its ponytail outside the apartment door before unlocking it and stepping inside with a soft sigh.

"There's my favorite ex-girlfriend!"

"Shut up or I'll make you get home on your own."

Hailey laughed and looked up from toeing her shoes off. Adam was sitting at the island in the kitchen with a glass of pop in front of him, and Jay was standing across from him, cutting an apple into slices.

"What're you doing here?" she asked, walking over to grab a bottle of water from the fridge and drag her hand along Jay's back.

"Your husband thought I was bored since Mak's at hockey practice, so he invited me over after he dropped her off for me," Adam said. He pushed out the bar stool next to him for her and added, "Hope you don't mind."

"Not at all," Hailey replied. While she hated that Adam's absence made Jay's even more present in the bullpen, she was glad that Jay could help out Kim and Adam when everyone else was at work. He'd taken over any of the driving Adam would have done for the past week as Adam was still being told to take it easy and not drive if possible.

When Kim had first asked them for help, she'd been hesitant, but they'd insisted they could make it work. After they'd been on the receiving end of help from their friends – even if they didn't accept it all the time – there was nothing else they'd rather do.

She smiled at Jay and asked, "When do you have to pick her up?"

"We'll leave in about half an hour," he answered, "She has strict instructions to have an apple ready for the ride home, so here I am."

"You're like a perfect housewife," Adam said, reaching over to grab one of the pieces of apple.

"And you're an ass," Jay replied. He still smirked, though, and turned back to Hailey. "Adam was saying we should all go out tonight. What do you think?"

She turned to Adam and raised an eyebrow. "You're clear to drink?"

"A beer won't kill me," he said.

Hailey scoffed and asked, "What's Kim have to say about that?"

"Kim isn't in charge of me," Adam replied, "But, if she were, she'd probably say, uh, she'd…" He trailed off and laughed slightly.

"Mhmm," Hailey hummed. She poked at his glass of pop in front of him and said, "She'd say 'no,' just like Will and any other doctor would. I'd love if you could be a driver, but seeing as you can't even do that, should we really all go out?"

"Oh, come on, Hailey, he-"

She shot Jay a look and crossed her arms.

"It'd be fun," Adam said, breaking her gaze from Jay. "Maybe we go somewhere with food; is that okay? We don't need to just get drinks. I'm just kind of sick of 'going wild' and drinking a Coke."

Hailey smiled slightly and let out a breath. "I guess there's nothing wrong with that."

"And you all deserve a night out," Jay added, "This case ate you up and spit you out. I'm buying a round – pop for you, but you can deal."

"You don't-"

"You pay and drive and cook? Hailey really got a winner."

Hailey rolled her eyes despite Jay's laugh at Adam's joke, yet still managed a smile while pulling her feet up on her stool.

While she knew that Adam really should not be drinking right now, she also knew that he wouldn't push himself and wouldn't have a beer wherever they ended up. He needed a night out. They all needed one. There was nothing wrong with everyone going out for drinks and appetizers. It would be fun and allow her to relax after feeling like her brain was turning to mush everyday.

"I'll text everyone," Adam announced, not even waiting for anyone to say anything before pulling his phone out.

Jay chuckled and shook his head as he reached under the island to pull out a bag for Makayla's apple slices. He nodded at Hailey and asked, "How was work?"

She shrugged and said, "Work."

Jay raised an eyebrow and added, "Want to talk about it?"

She simply shook her head and took a long sip of water.

With Adam right next to her on some sort of high over the idea of going out with friends that night, she didn't want to bring down his mood. She'd spent the day going between running background on a new case and driving to the juvenile center where Callum was currently staying while Sam was in jail herself. The court placed him there shortly after Adam was shot and it was revealed who did it. Adam had fought it at first, but after everyone – ranging from Kim and Kevin to even Dante – made it clear that Callum shouldn't just walk free, he'd stopped his arguments. Hailey told Jay about it when the arguments first began, but it'd ended in him hesitantly agreeing with Adam.

At the time, he had brought up when he'd been shot himself and how keeping Angela out of prison was the right choice. Hailey hadn't liked the reminder of what had happened to him, but quickly shook the thought from her head to counter his argument by saying that Angela had known about him falsely sending Marcus West to jail. There had been reason to keep Angela quiet and out of jail. There was nothing besides age that should prevent Callum receiving some sort of punishment for what had happened.

Today, Hailey had gone to talk to Callum and ask him a few remaining questions about what had happened that day with Adam. He'd been honest and didn't seem to have anything to hide. He'd been following what his grandfather had asked of him and hurt the person trying to take him away. There didn't seem to be any regret in his face or voice over what had happened. It was haunting, and she'd had no regrets herself over stopping at a coffee shop and getting herself a cookie with her drink. It was silly, but if she couldn't have Jay with her in that moment to talk through what was going on in her head, she figured she could comfort herself with a peanut butter cookie to remind herself of him.

Jay, however, didn't seem to accept her silence as a good enough answer, but he still didn't fight her as he reached in the fridge for a water that he placed next to the bag of apples. A small part of Hailey had worried that not working together would shift how they read each other, maybe hindering their abilities to look in each other's eyes and just get what the other person was thinking, but, right now, with Jay looking in her eyes as he quietly worked to build a snack for Makayla, she knew he was very much aware of her thoughts. He didn't know that she'd gone to talk to Callum today, but he knew she was keeping something about work away from him. She could also tell that he was planning on asking her again once they were alone.

There was no way they were going to leave right from Makayla's practice to go to the restaurant, so they'd have an hour or two once he got back home to talk. Hailey wasn't sure whether or not she was looking forward to it. She did know that it'd be good for her to clear the air, though, and let her worries off her chest, so she settled back in her seat and took another sip of water. The alone time with Jay would be beneficial for her and remind him that she did trust him with what was stressing her out or causing her to lose sleep. He would appreciate the conversation as well.

"All right, text is sent. I'm gonna hit the bathroom, then maybe we can take off, Jay? Catch the end of practice?" Adam said as he stood from the bar stool.

"Mhmm," Jay hummed without shifting his gaze from Hailey.

Adam hit the island then made his way through the bedroom toward the bathroom.

The second he was out of sight, Jay walked around the island and grabbed Hailey's waist. He raised an eyebrow then leaned down to rest his forehead to hers. "What happened?" he whispered.

She squeezed her eyes shut, feeling her eyelashes brush against his cheeks. "Adam is here," she mumbled.

"I don't care," Jay replied, "I'm doing him a favor. He can-"

"That kid has no regrets," Hailey finally hissed, opening her eyes to look at him, "He shot Adam and doesn't care. 'He deserved it. I had to.' That's what he said to me, and I just had to sit there and listen. A child shot my friend – someone who means so much to me, a man who has a family of his own – and I had to listen to how he deserved it. It-It…it is so messed up."

"Hailey."

The word brushed against her lips, and she shook her head quickly to avoid crying. Adam was here right now. She couldn't lose her cool and start crying. He would want to know what happened, and she didn't know if she had the strength to tell him that the kid he grew to care for had no regrets for shooting him in cold blood.

Jay wrapped his arm around her shoulders and tugged her against his chest. He kissed the top of her head and whispered, "Take a second. Focus on me. Breathe."

It broke the dam inside her. Hailey couldn't understand how a child could shoot someone with the intent to kill and then how that child's mother could watch the victim begin to bleed out on the floor of her house before leaving him there to die. There didn't seem to be any guilt or regret whatsoever. When she'd shot Roy, she could barely function. It ate her alive. The same had happened to Jay: committing murder, no matter the reason, while off the book led to him going to Bolivia. Callum shot Adam, and he swore he would have done it again if given the chance. It was messed up.

"Okay, okay," Jay murmured, rubbing her back and tightening his hold on her, "I'm here. I'm here."

She sniffled and gripped onto his shirt. "He doesn't care," she repeated, "He doesn't care that Adam could have died. He doesn't care."

"And that is screwed up," Jay said quietly, "It is disgusting that there are people who can do horrible things in the world and feel no regret." He stepped back enough to brush her hair from her face, peeling the few strands from her tear stained cheeks. Placing his hands on either side of her face, he whispered, "We know that death and murder and shooting people is not okay. We know that. We have been there. It is not something that just goes away over night. We also know, though, that if there ever is someone who doesn't care like Callum is saying, that that person is sick and needs help. He's a kid who has been given lies and a horrible mentality. If he's in that center, hopefully he can get the help he needs so he can really understand the impact of what he did. That's not on you to figure out, and it's not on Adam either."

"I just don't get it," Hailey whispered, "How does this happen? How does a kid become like that?"

Jay shook his head and brushed his thumbs under her eyes. "You've said his grandfather pretty much indoctrinated him. That…" He took a deep breath and shook his head. "When someone treats you a certain way and teaches you how to do things or what to believe for the majority of your life – the majority of your career – you begin to see like them."

Hailey closed her eyes because she knew he wasn't just talking about Callum anymore: he was talking about himself. Voight had poisoned him into believing this power built through deception and bending the law to your will was power well-earned. Jay had slipped out of her grasp, away from the man she loved and vowed forever with, because of the pain their job had brought him. He became someone she couldn't recognize. That was the danger of having some sort of mentor who had such extreme views so different from what was right or what you once believed.

Jay got out, though. He removed himself from the situation, took a giant step back to reevaluate everything in his life, and got better. It wasn't easy then and it certainly was still something he was working at, but he at least had the strength to know the right thing to do.

Callum didn't have that right now. He was a kid and likely didn't grow up thinking anything else was right. This wasn't like where Jay knew deep down that he was wrong in going off-the-book or telling lies or threatening people or even killing them without the law on his side; this was a child who had lived his entire life being told a certain story. Jay knew there were better ways to live his life; Callum did not.

"All right, I'm ready to get my kid, and- Hey, everything…everything all right?"

Hailey sniffled quickly and wiped at her face in a lame attempt to hide her tears from Adam. She knew she wouldn't have had enough time to really share anything with Jay, but he knew exactly how to get it out of her, and now she had to deal with Adam knowing she wasn't okay after work today.

"Long day," Jay answered for her, stepping to her side as if that'd prevent Adam from looking at her, "She's gonna take a shower while we're gone to wash the day from her. You've been there."

"Yeah. I…yeah."

Hailey pressed the heel of her hand into her eye and took a deep breath. A shower would help wash the day from her, but it certainly wouldn't wash away the pain she was feeling. This wasn't even something a backrub or motrin could take away. It was deep, a pain that'd settled within the pit of her stomach, and it was going to haunt her for a while. It scared her.

She slipped off the barstool and set a hand on Jay's back. Stepping around him, she looked at Adam and wasn't surprised to see him so concerned. He cared for her and that almost made this whole thing worse. Losing him would have been devastating, so to have a child sit in front of her and say it should have happened was heart wrenching.

"I love you," she said softly, "Do you know that?"

Adam smiled slightly and let out a soft chuckle. "I do. I love you too."

She felt Jay's gaze turn toward her and noticed his smile out of the corner of his eye.

When she'd dated Adam, she'd never told him she loved him. She'd thought nothing of it, and it wasn't until they broke up that it was because the love she'd felt for him wasn't the intense, end of the world love she felt for Jay that she realized that was why she wasn't able to say it. She loved him like a friend and knew he'd always be in her life, but they were better off as just that: platonic friends that would do anything for the other no matter the time of day or location. They understood each other, but also irritated each other in ways others wouldn't understand. A friend type of love that she wouldn't trade for anything.

She finally spoke those three words to him when he and Kim lost their baby almost a year after she'd broken up with him. He'd been sitting off to the side of the waiting room while Kim was being treated, and Jay had stepped away to meet with the victim's parents who had just walked in the hospital looking as terrified as everyone felt. Jay was going to drive her home once that was settled, so she had a few minutes to herself. She chose that moment to walk over and sit next to Adam, grabbing his hand that was in a death grip around the arm of the chair.

They'd sat in silence for a moment before he'd flipped his hand over and grabbed her fingers. "I'm so scared," he'd whispered.

"I know," she'd replied, finally turning to look at him, "But we're here for you. I'm here for you. I love you."

She remembered the words just slipping from her lips, but that she'd had absolutely no regret in saying them. It hadn't been like with Jay where she'd been terrified of accepting the feeling and moving forward in their relationship. This had been reassuring and safe. Adam had needed her in that moment, and she was more than willing to help him, comfort him, and be there for him. She did love him. She loved how he made her laugh and how determined he was and how he went into everything with his full heart. He was a good man who didn't deserve the crappy hand he was being dealt with right now. He would have been a good father, and it wasn't fair that he couldn't be one in this moment.

He'd smiled at her words and nodded in response. His hand had tightened around hers before he'd leaned closer and kissed the top of her head. "I love you too, Hail," he'd said quietly against her temple, "Thank you for being here."

Now, she stared at her friend, tears still in her eyes as if they never left that hospital waiting room, and knew they truly didn't deserve all the pain they'd ever endured. They were good people – all of them, Jay and Kevin and Kim and even Dante and Vanessa included – and that had to mean something. Good people had to get happy endings. They deserved love and joy and family.

And she was determined that they all get that someday.

"I'm glad you're alive," she continued, "I don't know what I would have done without you."

Adam shook his head and walked over to pull her in a tight hug. "I'm glad to be here," he said quietly, earning a soft laugh from her.

She wiped her eyes again as she stepped back from him. "Go get your girl – or, actually, go get in my husband's car so he can go get your girl."

"Always hilarious," Adam said. He reached over to brush his knuckles to her cheek then looked to Jay to say, "You good?" before walking around the island to grab Makayla's snack.

"Course." Jay squeezed Hailey to his side and kissed the top of her head. "Shower, reset. I'll be back soon," he whispered in her ear.

She nodded and squeezed his hand as he passed her. He kept turning back toward her as he slipped his wallet in his pocket and grabbed his keys.

"I'm okay," she said so softly that she knew he didn't hear. He nodded in response to whatever he heard or could figure out based on her lips and turned to lead Adam out of the apartment.

The second the door was closed, Hailey let out a breath and leaned back against the island. Adam was alive. Jay was home. And she was healed.

Mostly.

She thought.

The shower helped. The heat wrapped around her and washed away the feeling of being at work. All thoughts of Callum and Adam slipped down the drain, but she kept thinking back to Jay and his quiet words relating him to the little boy.

He'd been in a dark place when he'd left her. It hadn't happened over night, but was the result of months of trying to make up Anna's death to Voight. He felt guilty, and she knew why, and yet that didn't make his actions any easier to accept. With him, at least, he was able to recognize his mistakes and learn from them. Maybe his path to understanding that was too extreme and dangerous for her liking, but it brought him back to her, and that needed to be what she focused on.

"Hailey, I'm home!"

She breathed in the steam of the shower one last time before turning off the water. Normally, Jay would have remained quiet upon coming home – not to scare her, but rather surprise her or make her smile when he walked in on her in the bathroom. She knew he was just calling out as to not do what he tried to avoid, and she didn't blame him. Her mind was everywhere right now, and there was no way she would have reacted well had he stepped into the shower with her when she was least expecting it.

There was a knock on the bathroom wall, and Hailey turned to see Jay stepping through the door. She wiped the water from her face and pushed the shower door open.

"I've got it," he said softly, quickly walking over to grab her towel off the counter for her. He wrapped it around her shoulders then hugged her to him.

"You're getting wet," she murmured against his shirt.

"Who cares? I have other clothes," he replied softly.

She laughed and closed her eyes to breathe him in. "Thank you for being here," she whispered.

Jay made a soft noise, and she knew what he meant: there wasn't anywhere else he would want to be right now.

"Let's get you dry and in some clothes," he said while still rubbing his hands over her back.

She nodded and reached up to rub at her eyes. "I'm sorry."

"For being worried about our friend?" Jay asked, stepping back to grab another towel, "For having feelings? For getting overwhelmed and stressed at work?"

Hailey blushed and adjusted the towel already around her shoulders to be situated over her chest before grabbing the second one from Jay. She began drying her hair off and said, "When you put it like that."

Jay chuckled softly and leaned over to kiss her cheek. "Don't apologize for being human."

Smiling slightly, Hailey nodded and bent over to wrap the towel around her hair. As she straightened up, she said, "You're not the first to say that to me over the past few weeks."

"Robin say it too?" Jay asked.

Hailey nodded again and led the way to their bedroom. She rifled through her drawer for a pair of shorts then said, "I hate that I do it. I know there's no reason to say it, but when it distracts you from-"

"Whoa, stop right there."

Hailey looked up at Jay sitting at the edge of their mattress and raised an eyebrow.

He quickly shook his head and put a hand out, so that she frowned but still walked over to grab it. Tugging her on his knee, he breathed, "You are not and never will be a distraction."

"Jay-"

"Hailey, do not."

There were several instances at work alone where Hailey could imagine she'd distracted Jay from what was important in the moment. Maybe she'd said something or could have gotten hurt or was just being herself, but Jay could not declare that she had never distracted him from anything.

"You're my wife, and I love you, and I will never, ever regret thinking about you or worrying about you. Do you hear me?" Jay asked. He set a hand on the side of her face and softened beneath her. "I love you," he repeated, "Forever, and I need you to understand that no matter what has happened between us or with our friends that you are always going to be on my mind."

Hailey bit her lip and brushed her hand over his chest. "You don't…I'm just me, there's no reason…"

Months before, she had known to keep things from Jay because she knew what he was saying was true. Had she told him every thought and feeling and bit of anxiety she felt while he was in Bolivia, he would have stayed up at night thinking of how he could fix it all from where he was. While he had been determined to better himself at his new job, he was also well aware of how much he'd hurt her by leaving, and he wanted to make up for it. If something would have happened to him because she told him she'd gotten hurt or was bothered by whatever at work, the guilt would have killed her.

Jay raised an eyebrow then shook his head and kissed her cheek. "There's always a reason when it comes to you. Believe me."

She sighed and tilted her head against his shoulder. Closing her eyes, she knew there was no way she could ever stop him from thinking about her or worrying for her. In her case, she didn't think she could ever stop thinking about him either. He made her happy and consumed her mind whether she was head over heels in love with him or angry at something he'd done.

She gave in to a slight nod and whispered, "I get it."

Jay hummed in acknowledgement and turned enough to kiss her forehead. "I know," he said softly, "I thought about that all the time while I was gone. I wasn't stupid, I know that you were worried about me when I was over there, and that scared me. Hell, I know you're still worried about me while I'm at work, and that scares me as much as it makes me laugh."

Hailey shot up and stared at him. "Sorry?"

"Well," Jay laughed, "I mean, come on, Hail. Bolivia – I get it. There were bullets and bombs and tight situations. You should have worried. When I'm at the academy with dummy guns and textbooks? You don't need to worry about me there. You need to think about yourself and stay focused."

She pursed her lips, but still shook her head and placed her hands on either side of his face. "It's not that I'm scared of you dying at the academy; I just want you happy."

"And I'm home with you," Jay whispered, "Hailey, I am happy, I promise you. A bad day at the academy is nothing like the bad days I'd have in Intelligence. This is where I'm supposed to be. I've accepted it, and I kind of think I'm pretty damn good at it. If you don't believe me, then maybe you can be a guest speaker sometime and come see me in action before doing a lecture of your own. Would that help?"

Hailey couldn't help but smile as she brushed her thumbs over his cheeks. She had to admit that while she was very much aware of how much happier Jay was now, she had been curious to see what he was actually like at his new job. She wondered if he was strict, how the kids – recruits or students as he called them – listened to him, if he made jokes, what kind of 'real-life' advice he gave, all of it.

"I'd like that," she said softly, "We can train the next generation of cops together."

Jay chuckled and breathed, "That's my girl." He kissed her softly then tightened his hold on her and fell back on the mattress, much to her laughter.

"Jay!"

He laughed as well and kissed her forehead. "We're gonna meet at six, so we have a bit before we have to leave."

Hailey hummed and rolled on top of him to settle on his stomach. "And what are we planning on doing with our time?"

Jay shrugged against the mattress and played with the edge of her towel. "I could cheer you up."

"Oh, I see," Hailey said softly, holding back another laugh.

Jay sat up and nudged her to his lap. Slipping his hands beneath her towel, he said, "I could…tell you a joke or two, maybe give you a back rub, make you another shake…any of that sound good?"

Hailey smiled and rested her arms over his shoulders. "All of it?"

Laughing, Jay kissed her before hugging her tightly and resting his chin on her shoulder.

"You…are amazing, Hailey Upton," he whispered in her ear, "And I am so proud to be your husband."

She let out a soft sound and closed her eyes. Rubbing her hands down his back, Hailey focused on him as he was right now.

There had been pain. He had hurt her by getting sucked into an ideology that she knew he didn't truly believe. He let power overcome his real personality and heart, and it hurt them both in the end. Everything had seemed impossible with sadness and anger itching at every aspect of their lives.

But now they were on the other side of that dark tunnel. They were basking in the light together and growing as people and as a couple. While it had seemed impossible months before, she couldn't imagine doing anything else in her life.

Maybe Callum would get to this point where, like Jay, he could see brighter, better things, but maybe he wouldn't. That wasn't Hailey's responsibility. Even Jay's happiness wasn't something she could control. She certainly helped and was determined to make sure he could survive, but love gave her that opportunity. With Callum, she felt bad for the boy and maybe sympathized with him a little; however, that was all there was. She could not continuously worry about what he believed in – that was not her job.

She had a little more control over Adam. Going out to dinner was going to help him emotionally heal. She wouldn't change his bandages like she'd done with Jay, but she would support him and make him smile and entertain whatever stupid joke he made. She would watch his daughter and support his girlfriend – if that's what Kim even was to him now – and reassure them both that they would get through this.

She did, as did Jay.

Recovering from trauma was a long road, but one made much easier with a support system. It led to many more smiles and much more laughter. More hugs like the one she found herself wrapped in and more whispers of 'I love you' in the dead of night. She couldn't look back and regret anything that had happened.

Like Jay had said about her, she would never regret thinking about him and worrying about his feelings or his health or what he was doing. In the end, it always brought a smile to her face, and she didn't think she could ever regret a thing like that.

Hailey slipped from Jay's truck once he parked behind the restaurant they were meeting everyone at and groaned, "God, I hate the heat."

"And it's just beginning," Jay said as he walked around to grab her hand and lead her inside, "Come July, we're going to roast."

Hailey shook her head pushed open the door to the building. As the cool air hit her, she let out a soft sigh and closed her eyes.

"Dramatic much?" Jay laughed.

She sent him a smirk before stepping up to the hostess. "Six, please."

"Give me a minute," the girl replied as she stepped away.

Hailey turned to face Jay and raised an eyebrow. "I'm dramatic?"

He laughed loudly and said, "Don't even start with me. Maybe I can be dramatic when I'm annoyed, but I'm a generally cool person."

"Oh, you're cool?" Hailey teased, crossing her arms, "I don't know, babe. I mean, right now, you're wearing jeans, and it's pushing eighty-five – that's dumb."

"I'm fine," Jay chuckled at her joke, "And I'm pretty sure you're in jeans as well."

"Jean shorts," Hailey corrected, "And a tank-top. I'm prepared for the weather."

"It's going to get worse than this," Jay said, "I'm doing a slow transition to ease myself into Summer."

"Mhmm," Hailey hummed, still smirking as she reached over to lightly grab his arm.

The hostess returned and announced their table was ready, so the two of them followed her to a corner booth in the back of the restaurant. Once seated, they asked for water and picked up a couple of the menus already laid out for them.

"And by the way," Jay continued, causing Hailey to look up, amused at the tone in his voice, "I used to have a motorcycle. That was cool."

"Uh-huh," Hailey said with a nod, "That was cool. Why'd you sell it again?"

Jay glared at her slightly and sank back in his seat. "That doesn't matter."

"I think it does," Hailey laughed, "Come on, Jay, why'd the cool guy sell his motorcycle?"

He huffed and said, "Because I never rode it and needed a down payment on our apartment."

"Super cool," Hailey teased, "Very responsible too. My badass husband used to have a motorcycle. Love it."

Jay quietly mocked her and held up the menu between the two of them.

Hailey laughed and pushed it away so she could lean over and kiss his cheek. "I've always appreciated you selling it, though," she said, "But I do wish you would have taken me out for a ride at least once because it was cool."

Jay raised an eyebrow and turned further toward her in the booth. "You would have wanted to go for a ride with me?"

Nodding, Hailey picked her menu back up and looked at it as she said, "Holding on to your back as you drive us through Chicago, maybe up to Wisconsin with the fresh air. Stopping to get drinks or look out at the water. You would have worn your leather jacket too, not because you needed to but because I would have asked because, yes, I think that's hot and cool. We would have been free."

She hadn't even known Jay had a motorcycle until they'd been partnered for just over a year and a half. She found out because they were on a lunch break, and he asked that they stopped at his storage garage to check the gas level on it. She'd been so shocked, she remembered just laughing in disbelief at the question before agreeing to the side trip. He'd rolled his eyes at the reaction, but told her about buying it after a fight with his dad and how he liked to go for rides whenever his mind was playing tricks on him. She had appreciated the honesty and made sure to tell him that. She knew it couldn't have been easy for him to say, especially after his dad's passing, so it felt like a big step in their relationship.

From then on, whenever she'd see a motorcycle, she couldn't help but wonder what it'd be like to ride on it with him. Even when she was dating Adam, she'd let her mind wander every once in a while to Jay and his secret hobby. She couldn't deny it was hot. There was something about him going off on his own, in a leather jacket with sunglasses on and the wind in his face, that made her stomach flutter. She would have loved to even just see him on it.

When they were looking for apartments and found The One, they had enough money for the payment, but they were both having to dip into their savings for it. She hadn't even considered selling anything to have a little extra money, and then Jay told her one night that he was putting his motorcycle up for sale to make sure they had enough money for some new furniture.

"You don't have to do that," she'd said as she sat up in bed, "You love-"

"I haven't driven it in months, maybe even a year. I don't think I've been on it since we started dating," Jay had interrupted, "It's okay. It'll help me save money anyways since I won't have to pay for the storage. Maybe I can get one in the future, like when I have a mid-life crisis or something."

At the time, she'd laughed, but now it just made her ache. She would have loved if his mid-life crisis involved buying a motorcycle again – instead he considered going to Bolivia a version of a mid-life crisis and that was painful. A motorcycle would have been much more fun.

Jay softened next to her at her words and smiled slightly. "I guess I have to start looking for one again."

Hailey laughed softly. "It's not a need, just a…I'd enjoy it if you had one. Someday – it doesn't have to happen right now."

Jay seemed to remember the last time they'd said he'd eventually get a motorcycle as well because he let out a breath and chewed on the inside of his bottom lip.

Hailey scooted closer to him and set a hand on his thigh. "This time, it's something to look forward to."

Jay shot her a smile and nodded. "Yeah," he said quietly, "Can be more like a goal than a crisis kind of thing."

"Exactly," Hailey replied before leaning up to kiss his cheek.

There was a loud knock on the table causing her to pull back quickly just to see Dante sliding in to the booth next to Jay and Kim going to sit next to her. Kevin and Adam stood in front of the booth, both looking amused.

"I gave you two a couple hours," Adam said before moving to sit next to Kim, "Couldn't you have gotten all this out of the way earlier?"

"Hilarious," Jay said.

Kevin chuckled as he sat next to Dante and said, "How are you?"

"Good, thanks," Jay replied while passing out menus, "Glad to be here. Glad you're all okay."

Kim smiled slightly and looked toward Adam. "We're very lucky."

Adam nodded and took a deep breath, pulling his gaze from her to look between everyone and say, "I'm lucky to have all of you too. The last couple weeks have been…it's been awful, I don't know how else to describe it, but because of you guys, I'm here, and I couldn't be more grateful. Thank you."

"Don't even worry about it," Kevin said, "You've done the same for all of us."

"A hundred times over," Hailey added softly.

Jay's hand slid on top of hers still on his thigh and squeezed slightly.

They both knew how much their friends meant to them and what it meant to have people in their corner. There was no hesitation in helping out Adam or Kim. No regrets about any of that either.

They all deserved tonight, and Hailey was determined to make sure they enjoyed it as it happened.

The pizza she split with Jay was delicious, and the margaritas she ordered with Kim were even better. Hailey felt like she was finally truly relaxing after everything that had happened with Adam and the Becks. The night out with Jay was great for taking a night to herself and for their relationship, but there was something about being out with their friends and celebrating the end of a case that was even more satisfying and relaxing. She could see how happy everyone was and how they'd clearly all survived. This was everything she'd needed since finding out Adam had been shot.

"You want another drink?" Jay asked her as she finished her second slice of pizza.

She waved him off and said, "I shouldn't."

"Oh, come on, Hailey, have a little fun," Adam said, "If I can't drink, have an extra for me."

"I've already had two," she laughed, "I don't need a-"

Her eyes fell on a man a couple tables behind him, and she quieted down. She wasn't sure if it was the alcohol tricking her mind or if it really was who she thought it was. She hadn't seen him in months. She didn't even think he lived around here. The last she'd heard, he was at an apartment a few blocks away from her mom.

"You okay?" Kim asked.

"I think she needs that third margarita," Dante said.

Everyone laughed, but Hailey waved them off and tried straining her neck to look over Adam's shoulder.

"What is it?" Jay chuckled, "You see someone?"

Hailey nodded slightly and tilted her head. "Does that look like Theo?"

Jay's eyes widened, and he sat up slightly to see what she was looking at.

"Who's Theo?" Kevin asked.

"My brother," Hailey said quietly.

Kim and Adam spun in their seats to see if they could see who they were looking at.

"Hey, stop," Hailey hissed, pulling at Kim's arm, "He might see you."

"Which one is he?" Adam asked.

"Stop it," Hailey repeated, reaching over to hit his shoulder.

She wasn't quite sure whether or not she actually wanted to talk to Theo. The last time she'd seen him, their mom had had everyone over for the new year. Jay had been gone for almost two months at the time, so she had to use the opportunity to explain to both her brothers and her parents that her husband was currently working in a different country. None of them were exactly happy to hear the news.

Her brothers weren't really protective of her, but they still wanted her happy and to end up happier and better than their mother. Theo had seemed to take the news of Jay's absence harder than Nik did. Nik had been hesitant when he'd first met Jay, but Theo had seemed to like him instantly. Hailey knew the two exchanged phone numbers and had seen a couple texts they exchanged after meeting each other with greetings for the holidays or random hellos. It'd been nice to know that one of her brothers really liked her husband.

Regarding Jay being in Bolivia, he'd asked a few times while at dinner and then again in texts over the following days why she hadn't forced Jay to stay. He wasn't happy that Hailey appeared to 'just give up' on her marriage and kept telling her how nice he thought Jay was. He was in disbelief over the whole thing – as if she wasn't. It'd gotten too hard to continue talking with him that she started ignoring his messages. Even on her birthday, she simply reacted to the text he sent her with a heart and prayed he wouldn't push any further.

She wasn't sure how he'd react to not only Jay being back, but also the fact that Hailey accepted him back in her life and her home. She especially knew that Nik wouldn't be happy about it. Now, when she was happy with her friends, didn't seem to be the time to test that out.

"The blonde one?" Dante asked, "Like three tables back?"

"Yeah- how?" Hailey asked, spinning back to him.

Dante shrugged and said, "Kinda has the same face as you."

"That his girlfriend?" Kevin asked, "He's with a girl and another couple."

"I don't know," Hailey sighed. She set her chin in her palm and turned toward Jay as if that'd hide her face. It didn't even matter if her brother didn't see her, she just wanted to be anywhere but here.

She had not expected to have to confront her family tonight or even ever. It was bad enough when Jay first left and then to wrestle with it again before the vow renewal. Now, when she was two margaritas deep and in therapy and more in love than ever, shouldn't be the time for her to talk with Theo. Life was too good and as least complicated as it could be. She didn't have time to bring her family back in her circle.

"When was the last time you talked to him?" Kim asked.

Hailey shrugged and said, "February?"

"So he doesn't…" Adam trailed off, his eyes flickering from her to Jay.

Hailey shook her head as Jay sighed next to her. He rubbed the back of his neck and cleared his throat.

"I can go talk to him," he said, "Maybe clear the air."

"No, no, I don't want that. I…no," Hailey sighed, "We're just going to keep as we were. You offered me another margarita?"

No one moved or said anything as she looked toward Jay. Two minutes ago, she'd been pushing away the alcohol and wanting to slow down. Now that she'd seen her brother, she needed something to take the edge off, and everyone knew that wasn't something she typically liked to do – Jay especially.

This just wasn't the time to approach Theo. She'd already confronted a shadow of her past today after meeting with Callum and hearing Jay say he understood how the boy got sucked into the dark, disgusting world. She didn't deserve more pain. Tonight was about relaxing and having fun, and she was determined to do just that.

Jay held her gaze for a moment then nodded slightly and held up his hand in the direction of the waiter.

"Hailey, maybe-"

"Another strawberry margarita for her?" Jay asked as the waiter approached their table, interrupting Kim's concerned voice, "And maybe a pitcher of water? Anyone want anything else?"

There was a beat before Adam let out a breath and raised his hand slightly. "Another coke, if you don't mind."

"I'll take another beer too," Kevin said, raising his glass.

"Same," Dante added.

The waiter looked to Kim and raised an eyebrow, but she shook her head and mumbled, "I'm good, thanks."

He nodded and walked away with their order, leaving everyone glancing around at each other without saying anything. Hailey felt awkward and hated that she was the reason everyone was suddenly on eggshells.

She had wanted tonight to be about Adam and the case being closed. It was not supposed to be about her, and it certainly wasn't supposed to be about Theo.

Jay's hand came to her lower back and began slowly rubbing circles through her tank top. It grounded her in the moment and was enough to get her hands to stop shaking at her sides. She reached over to grab her nearly empty margarita glass and tipped an ice-cube in her mouth. As she focused on the ice melting on her tongue, she tried shooting Kevin a look to say she was okay.

He knew she wasn't, and Jay certainly was on the same page, but she needed someone to help her move past this moment. She needed a distraction and some sort of support.

Luckily for her, Kevin smiled slightly and said, "So I met a girl."

"What?" Adam burst, "When?"

"You're just going to keep this information from us?" Dante asked, "I thought you were all about sharing information."

Kim laughed softly and finally tore her gaze away from Hailey. "We're not exactly super open about everything."

"We just like to know all the information we can about you," Jay said, "It's fun."

"Hilarious," Dante replied.

Kevin chuckled and shrugged, nodding at Adam. "Actually because of you, man; she's a nurse at Med. I met her one day while I was walking up to visit you."

"Huh, look at me being a matchmaker," Adam said.

"Please," Hailey laughed, "That is not at all what happened."

"Were you there?" Adam asked, "Were you there? Doesn't sound like it, Upton, so shut it and let Kev tell us all about how I saved his dating life."

"You did not save my dating life," Kevin said, "That is a bit dramatic."

"When was the last time you went on a date?" Jay asked, a smirk teasing his lips, "Pretty sure I was still in Intelligence when that happened."

Kevin opened his mouth to reply then shook his head and said, "You all suck. Genuinely, I don't like any of you."

Everyone laughed, and Hailey leaned back into Jay's arm. This was exactly the kind of thing she needed tonight to clear her mind.

Unfortunately, even when the waiter came with their last tray of drinks, she couldn't help but let her eyes wander across the restaurant toward her brother. Even from her spot in the corner booth, she could tell his hair still stuck up at the back of his head and knew that the scar by his right eye practically disappeared when he laughed. Perhaps the girl next to him was his girlfriend like Kevin had suggested; he certainly seemed to smile at her a lot and even took a sip of her drink at one point.

Seeing him like this – happy, relaxed, everything she was hoping she could be – actually did make her smile. Theo was a good person who was dealt a crappy hand in life – just like her. They'd hit a rough spot in their relationship, but she wasn't quite sure she cold blame him. Had his girlfriend also up and left him, she probably would have had several things to say regarding the matter as well.

It's what family was supposed to do.

The third margarita was maybe more than Hailey should have had, but she enjoyed the buzz it gave her as she slid out of the booth with Jay just under an hour later. She laughed softly while grabbing at his arm for balance.

"You good?" he chuckled, tugging her into his side and draping his arm over her shoulder so that his fingers could trail against her heart tattoo peaking out from beneath her tank top.

"Mhmm," she hummed, "I'm happy."

"Good," Jay breathed before leaning down to kiss the side of her head.

She smiled and closed her eyes, letting him lead her out of the restaurant. She would do anything right now to somehow teleport home and have Jay do whatever he'd like to her in their bed.

"He's looking."

Jay's voice buzzed against her ear, so she sighed and glanced around at their friends walking near them on the way out. "Who?"

"Theo."

Hailey pursed her lips and forced herself not to look behind them.

"Should we go say something?" Jay asked.

Hailey shook her head and tightened her hold around his middle. "Not now," she said, "Tonight's about Adam and us and…and I don't want to make things even more awkward."

Jay leaned back enough to get a better look at her and said, "If you're sure."

She nodded. "I'm very sure."

His eyes flickered back behind her where she knew her brother was sitting, supposedly staring at them both, and then he nodded as well. "All right. Let's get you home."

She relaxed with a laugh and said, "Please. I have some ideas on how we can spend the night."

"Oh, yeah?" Jay chuckled, "And what do they include?"

"Please save it for the car," Dante said as he held the door open for them, "You're both great, I'm happy you're happy, but we're in public."

Hailey laughed loudly with Jay and shook her head. "We would never."

"At least not in front of you all," Jay added.

"Great, thanks, appreciate it," Dante said through his own laugh.

"See you on Monday?" Hailey said.

Dante nodded and said, "I'll be there. Enjoy your weekend."

"See you!" Kevin called out on his way to his car.

"Thanks for coming!" Adam added.

Jay waved at them all over his shoulder before pulling his keys out and kissing Hailey's cheek. "Where were we? You said you have plans?"

She smiled and looked up at him. "It's been like three days since we've had sex, so…"

"Three days is a long time," Jay laughed. He kissed the top of her head and said, "I'm glad it's just been three days. We don't have to worry about much longer than that for a long time."

Hailey hid her smile in his chest, just pulling back once they reached the truck. Earlier that year, three days had been a drop in the bucket – it'd been months since they had sex – but they'd survived. Now, she could have Jay whenever she wanted and found that the way she wanted him was actually a lot like how she had him today: with comforting words and tight hugs and unexpected kisses on her cheek. She didn't need him constantly for sex, but did need him for times like now where he could read her and knew exactly how to make her smile or laugh. He was her person, and that was much more important to her than she ever imagined possible.

"I love you," she said once Jay helped her in the passenger seat of the truck.

He paused from shutting the door and smiled up at her. "I love you too."

She held his eyes for a second longer before he closed the door and began walking over to his seat.

She didn't think she'd ever get used to having him back home. This was what she needed while he was in Bolivia, and this was what she never wanted to lose again. Jay may have gotten sucked into power and control and a dark path months before, but she was determined that love and happiness and fun memories were going to guide him forward from now on.

She certainly knew that that was how she wanted to live her life.

Whether or not her brothers and parents were a part of it.

A/N: Thank you again to everyone for sticking around for the past 30 chapters. I hope you're ready for this next chunk :) Let me know what you think, and I'll see you next Monday!