Ch 1: Sick

Rating: K+ for language

Characters: Edward, Roy

Timeline: general

Notes: Getting started with some classic parental!RoyEd goodness! I don't remember exactly how long after Hughes was killed that the elrics found out, so ignore any inconsistencies and just know that this takes place shortly after Ed finds out but before all the stuff with Ross…which doesn't really make sense since that was all pretty subsequent but shhhh. Also this one's kinda mid but i really didn't know where to go with it lol

Roy tapped his fingers against his desk, looking at his pocket watch for the dozenth time. The minute hand had only ticked forward five notches since he last looked, but he was getting really impatient. Every minute Fullmetal was late to report in was another minute he had to put off his search for Hughes' murderer. He was used to the kid being late, and while it always annoyed him, he had important things to do today. It had been over a month since his best friend's death, and they were still no closer to finding out who killed him. It frustrated Roy to no end, and Fullmetal was now adding to that frustration.

A full hour and a half after the scheduled start of his shift, Edward finally showed up. He stumbled into Roy's office, head down and hood up, loose hair covering his face.

"Fullmetal, where the hell have you been?" Roy demanded. "Your shift starts at 9 o'clock when you're in town. You'd think after three years you'd know this." Edward didn't react to the reprimand, and it just pissed Roy off even more. "I have important things to do and your inconsiderate lack of punctuality is seriously impeding my ability to do them. What could have possibly kept you for an hour and a half this morning?" Roy swore he saw a shiver run through his subordinate's body, but he was too mad to question it. "Look at me when I'm talking to you, Fullmetal! I am your commanding officer, and it's about time you start giving me the respect I deserve, dammit!"

Edward finally looked up, and Roy felt all the air deflate from his lungs. The kid looked awful. His skin was a ghostly white, aside from the feverish pink tinged on his cheeks and the pronounced dark circles under his eyes. His hair wasn't in a braid or even a simple ponytail, just hanging limply under the hood of his coat. His eyes were dull and reddened, narrowed in an attempt at anger but failing to mask the clear misery on his face.

"I'm so late," he began, his voice gravelly and quiet, "because I had to fight my brother to even come here."

"Are you sick?" Roy asked, probably still looking a little too shocked by the boy's ragged appearance.

"No," Ed replied. "But Al thinks so."

"Well I think your brother is right. You look like hell."

"I'm fine, Mustang. I've just been…it's nothing." He shook his head a little, seemingly refocusing himself. "Why am I here, anyway? I can't help you with your case."

Roy could tell Ed was still mad at him for lying about Hughes' death, and he didn't really blame him. He still wasn't entirely sure why he'd lied in the first place. He'd never felt the need to protect the kid from the truth before, and it wasn't like Edward and Alphonse were unfamiliar with death. He just lied before he could even think about telling the truth. Hawkeye was mad at him, too, for doing that (now you've decided to treat them like children?) and Roy really had no explanation. He'd never treated the Elrics like children before, so why start now?

But as he looked at the obviously sick teenager standing in front of him, he felt the same sudden need to protect that he did when he lied about Hughes. "Come here, Ed," he said, his tone much softer than before.

Ed looked a little surprised by the sudden change, skeptically stepping closer. Roy stood, walking around his desk to the boy. He put a hand to Ed's forehead, unsurprised to find he was absolutely burning up.

"You have a fever. What were you doing to get yourself sick?"

"Nothing!" Edward hissed. "I've been at the dorm for the last four days!"

Four days…hasn't it been four days since he found out about Hughes' death? Roy thought. He looked back at the sleep-deprived circles under Ed's eyes and his pale skin and disheveled hair…and realized he looked exactly like Roy had looked the first week after Hughes died. The colonel understood now.

"Does this have to do with the brigadier general's death?" Roy asked, the words nearly catching in his throat. It still hurt to say.

Ed was quiet, not seeming to want to respond.

"Edward. It's okay." Roy had never been good at reassuring people, and he probably sounded more stern than gentle, but it seemed to get through.

Ed raised his gaze to meet the colonel's. He seemed to battle for a moment whether or not to speak, ultimately giving in. "I…I just…why did he have to die? I don't understand." A look of frustration settled on his face. "I kept having these nightmares, and now I can't sleep, and I never feel hungry either. And I just keep thinking about all the stuff he said and did for me and Al, and how I never really got to thank him for it. Al keeps telling me I need to eat and sleep and all that but I just can't. I just don't get it, Mustang."

Roy took a moment to think of how to respond. He wasn't used to Fullmetal being so open with his thoughts; he usually kept all his feelings to himself. "I don't understand it either…" he began. "Maes had been my best friend for years, and I always thought if one of us was going to get killed, it'd be me. He was supposed to help me along my rise to the top…he wasn't supposed to die."

"It was all my fault," Edward said, squeezing his eyes shut.

Roy blinked; he knew Ed was notorious for putting the blame on himself, but why would he think he was responsible for someone's murder? "How could it be your fault?" he asked.

"He was helping us!" When Ed reopened his eyes, they were glassy with unshed tears. "He was researching the stone for me and Al! If he hadn't been involved, he never would've gotten killed! How can I look at Gracia or Elysia, knowing I'm the reason he's gone?"

Roy was shocked. He knew Hughes was helping out the Elrics in their search, but he didn't realize that was why he'd been killed. A small, selfish part of him wanted to believe Ed's words, to say that the kid was the reason Hughes was dead…but he knew that was wrong. He knew Maes would have helped Ed and Al no matter the risk to himself, and it wasn't Ed's fault. He was just angry, and mourning…and so was Ed. "It wasn't your fault, Fullmetal. Hughes would've helped you no matter what."

"That's what Mrs. Hughes said…but I just can't bring myself to accept it."

"You know people can make their own choices," Roy said, smirking slightly. "Not everything is because of you."

Edward didn't respond to that.

"Now c'mon. Let's go." Roy put a hand on Ed's shoulder, pushing him back.

"Go where?" the boy asked, looking back up at Roy.

"The dorms. You're sick."

"I'm not sick."

"I can feel the heat radiating off your body, Fullmetal. You look half-dead."

Ed didn't say anything else, just let himself be guided out of the office. When they got to the stairs outside, he finally spoke. "What should I do? To sleep?"

Roy thought for a moment. "Honestly? Just let the nightmares come. You can't stop them. Just know you have people who will be here for you when you wake up." Ed nodded slightly. "And don't come back here until you're better, Ed. That's an order."

Ed smiled sardonically, turning to walk down the stairs. Roy watched him go, his heart aching. Why did that kid have to see so much death? It wasn't fair. But now, next time he showed up late, Roy would be a little more considerate.

Well, he'd try. There were never any promises with Fullmetal.

well that's prompt 1...the next one will be better, i promise :P