Let's fuck the Plot
Ever remember the times your dad gave you the talk, not the sex talk I mean the amused yet tiredly annoyed talk, the don't doit again while your mother is around talk, because that's what this feels like right now.
Sitting within a room, with Momo, Harley and Rumi, Wayde and the three had a small reunion before being dragged into said room by Loki who had been wearing Helldiver uniform and Cape before his attire shifting to his usual coat.
Pacing back and forth as he tried to make sense of the current situation, the wolf spoke.
"Do you three have any idea what you've done to the canon of this world?" Getting confused looks from the three women, Wayde leaned back proudly.
"You've not only removed the death of a leader here, but you've also given a Major And I mean MAJOR black eye to the fucker in the Big Fuckin Letter in orbit, you also, somehow someway, dropkicked the future plot of two major villains in the face by FUCKING one of them" turning to Wayde with a look of shock, Loki spoke.
"I don't know whether to Laugh, cry, punch you or have one of my female counterparts fuck you until you're a withered body" getting a look of confusion from Wayde he spoke.
"You have Counterparts?" getting a shrug from Loki he spoke.
"Yeah that was an extremely confusing situation for me let's move on" getting a shrug from Wayde as Harley and the others looked to him, they turned back to Wayde as he held the Vault Key.
"Good news is this thing I can super charge" getting a stunned silence, Wayde spoke.
"Can we go wake the warrior?"
"Fuck it let's go" following Loki to the door, he kicked it open to pop it off it's hinges, showing Patricia Tannis jumping at them marching by her to step up the stairs where they found Lilith and Tyreen talking over a map, Troy was marvelling Brick's muscles while Mordecai was… drinking with Angel who was being semi interrogated by Roland.
Looking over the sight, Loki brought out a pistol before firing into the ceiling, making everyone jump.
"LISTEN UP CHUCKLEFUCKS WE GOT A WARRIOR TO WAKE UP!" bringing up the key, Roland and Lilith gawked.
"Let's go to Iridium Blight" turning to a wall, Wayde quickly followed as Roland spoke for the Crimson Lance to gear up, stopping as Loki tore open the fabric of reality to make a portal.
Leaving the sight of a magma filled room to all.
Turning to Wayde he tossed him the key.
"Go nuts I gotta do damage control" with that he flashed out of sight, leaving Wayde holding the Key before looking to the room.
Looking at them all he spoke.
"Geronimo?" getting confused looks, Momo, Rumi and Harley tackled him through the portal as Tyreen and Tin-tin hugged him, the portal closing behind them.
"Next time don't tackle we could have landed in Lava" giving the large arena like room a look, Momo stood up with the others as Wayde rushed to the centre, the Key in hand as he stared at the Hole the key goes to.
"Shouldn't we wait for the others?" giving Momo a look as they approached Wayde as the key floated into the hole.
Wayde shrugged.
"We barely know them, may as well wake this bad boy up" turning to look around as the place shook, Wayde cupped his mouth excitedly.
"OH WARRIOR, WAKEY WAKEY HANDS OFF SNAKEY!" Getting a rumble as a roar echoed from within the magma, a Large lizard like creature made of stone climbed out with purple energy acting like ethereal wings.
Staring at the sight as it roared to the sky, Wayde spoke excitedly with his lovers giving hims tunned looks.
"YOU LOOK ADORABLE!" moving to a pillar as the warrior approached, it stared at Wayde as he climbed up to be eye level with it.
Getting a proper footing, Wayde waved it closer which it did.
"Your like a fiery Godzilla" rubbing it's face, the THING FUCKING PURRED!.
"WAYDE!?" looking down to Momo with a smile, he spotted her pointing behind him, making him turn to see Hyperion bots being dropped off.
Staring at the sight, Wayde turned back to The Warrior before speaking.
"You are for now on called Ryan, now smash the Robots and Kill Hyperion's EVRYTHING!" getting a roar from the now named "Ryan" the Dragon Vault Guardian turned and obliterated the Loader bots with Wayde watching in excitement as his New baby slaughtered the battlefield, his lovers yelling as they were surrounded by a purple shield.
Wayde gave a scream of excitement as The Warrior returned to him, letting him climb onto it's head to ride it.
Leaning down to the others, Wayde went to speak to pick them up if not for the Warrior to scoop up the platform holding the Key to hold them close to join him.
Staring at them as they tried to keep they're footing, Harley had a wide grin as she sat down beside Wayde. sharing a smile the group were given a front row seat of pure unfiltered destruction on Hyperion.