Torchwood: Divergence
Book Three: Rheoleiddiad

Chapter 31

Back in the Hub, Martha turned to their leader with a frown.

"Nobody said that Ianto got hurt at the café this morning," she complained.

"He didn't," Harkness stated simply, figuring they all might as well hear the facts. "The damage to his arm came later."

"Being asked how to handle a clean-up and having every word countermanded withing two minutes would make me want to hit something," Turlough stated evenly, still working away.

"Not quite," the Captain corrected from where he stood near the Autopsy Lab stairs, noting the irritated look Gwen gave the young redhead for his comment. "He was already upset by what happened at the café. He couldn't do anything but watch that girl die, lied to her to keep her from being afraid of death. It really bothered him, made him feel like he's not doing his job as a Guardian. What occurred here at the Hub made it worse. Even though I know his suggestion was the right thing to do, Gwen, I let you talk me into allowing you to try something else that was bound to end badly.

"Ianto felt I was doubting him, and it also made him doubt me. How could I honestly say I love and need him, if I'd take your side in this kind of situation? He's the one who faced that creature, had to handle the aftermath, and his gut instinct of how to deal with the body should have been the last word. I should have stood behind that decision no matter what. I all but told him I want you here more than him, Gwen, by letting you sway my decisions against my own better judgement. So, rather than start an argument he didn't think he'd win, he left the Hub… went to our new terrace house flat to have a seizure in peace."

"So, you come back and take a piece out of me because he's feeling inadequate and insecure?" Cooper snapped, hissing out one more bit of vitriol even as their leader scowled and pointed a warning finger at her. "Who needs a psych-eval?"

"Ianto's convinced he's a failure as a Guardian," Jack continued after a moment, his expression telling the former PC that she was on incredibly thin ice with him at the moment. "Afraid you're more important to me than he is, Gwen, and that the Scieron shouldn't have bothered bringing him back. Afterall, I keep supporting you instead at every turn, and I left his body to the whims of the Government in London without even trying to have it returned to his family or a single thought of a proper burial. That doesn't exactly say much for my argument that I love and need him. He told me he was a liar, and not just because of what happened with that girl this morning. But because he sore my occasionally roving eye didn't bother him, when it actually hurts him more than he can bear and always has. That he says he wants to mend your friendship, Gwen, but not if it's gonna come between him and me. And if I didn't truly want him with me because I want you more, then his whole life now is nothing but a lie."

Harkness paused to let his words and genuine displeasure with the situation sink in before coming to the next point he wanted to make.

"This is something that has been building for a while," he stated darkly. "Ianto is seriously depressed, more insecure than ever, so sad and hopeless that we actually had a close encounter with that Pledge Blade this morning. I was a whisper from losing him forever, and I won't make any secret of the fact that if it ever happens, I'm gone. The Universe, the future, the Earth, and Torchwood can sod off. This time I was lucky. Instead of committing suicide, he carved up his left arm… self-inflicted 'punishment' for all his supposed failings. Regardless of the blame being mine or no blame existing, he's taking responsibility for every problem there's been between us or around him since he came back from Hell last August, because he believes they happened purely by virtue of him being resurrected. Scieron weapons can damage the Shadows in his body, so wounds caused by them take longer to heal. He's been trying not to favour the arm, scared of worrying or irritating anyone, so don't make a fuss, yeah?"

The Captain looked at each of those present, before focusing solely on Cooper and finishing up.

"Ianto is not the cause of whatever issue you've got right now, Gwen," Jack explained stonily. "But you are a big part of his. He fought hard to overcome that venom induced nightmare and is trying his best to get things between you back to the way they were before the 456. You need to be willing to meet him half way. A major step in that is you not trying to get me to take sides with you from now on, yeah? Whatever is turning your attitude to crap, it needs to be dealt with. If you need help from Martha, or Rhys, or whoever the hell else, then ask for it. You really have to get a handle on it now, before it goes any further. Ianto isn't the only one you're having a negative effect on. Turlough's about ready to lock you out of the Hub if his recent comments mean anything, and I'm not gonna put up with you trying to treat me as your subordinate and arguing every order I give. If you honestly want to lead that badly, I'll surrender command of Torchwood-Cardiff to you and take Ianto somewhere as far away as he wants to go. Just say the words, and it'll all be yours.

"Now… Ianto is a very private person. Someone brings up what I just told you and he'll be completely mortified. So, it needs to be business as usual. Don't act any differently around him, don't ask about his arm, don't ask if he's okay unless he really seems to be in distress. And if he and I disappear into the office or downstairs, don't come hunting unless the world is literally ending. Whatever's making this depression he's suffering from linger, I want to find it and fix it, and I can't do that with an audience or interruptions. You now know the long and short of this morning, just don't broadcast it and stick to your projects. Lunch will be here soon, and we'll hit the Boardroom when it arrives. Until then, keep going with whatever you're doing."

He passed a very dour Gwen on his way to the office, saw her rise from her chair and head for the medical area.

"Martha, can you do a quick check on me after lunch?" Cooper queried earnestly. "Jack's right about my attitude lately, but I honestly don't know where it's coming from. Could it be hormonal, or something still off from the miscarriage? Should I worry about a brain scan, see if I've developed a tumour or something? Maybe even have an alien hitchhiker I didn't realise I'd picked up?"

"Tell you what," the young doctor frowned, obviously concerned. "Let me draw some blood now before you eat and I'll start on preliminary chemistry and hormonal checks. We'll move on from there depending on what they show."

The two moved down into the Lab, and Jack went to sit behind his desk and simply breathe. He'd been harsher with the Gwen than he probably needed to be, but he wanted to get the point across to himself as well as her. This was the first step in abolishing his old fantasies about the woman, a firm declaration of where his heart and loyalties lay… a position he'd been so sure of until he'd lost all hope and fled the planet. And he knew if he was hard on her, he had to be twice as hard on himself. This was not going to be a quick or easy fix, but he was determined to see it through.

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AN: Jack needs to be this strong all the time… He'll get there eventually.

Sorry for the late post. I have an extreme amount of work-related stress and anxiety going on at the moment and it's having a very negative impact on me both physically and mentally. Thank you for your patience.

Thank you to those reading the story. And thank you to those who have followed, favourited, and reviewed. NM