Always

Chapter One: The Wedding Disaster

Bella Swan

Before my head left the pillow that morning, I had already thought of Edward. It was the morning of our wedding. By the end of today, I would be his wife; I would be Bella Cullen and no longer Bella Swan. I didn't know if all brides woke up as nervous as I did; maybe, maybe not, who knows? The day had come so quickly that it felt like Edward had only planned it yesterday, and yet here we were, about to make our vows to each other in front of friends and family.

Some of them were aware of the journey I was about to embark upon as a new vampire, and for others, this would unknowingly be the last time any of them would ever see me again. Some people would remember me, unable to forget; others, with the passage of time and the events of life to follow, would. Whilst other brides worried about their venue, their dress, and their bridesmaids, I worried about the crushing guilt in the pit of my stomach over ruining the lives of Charlie, my mom, and, of course, Jacob. For the past month, the thought of their anguish and sorrow had brought tears to my eyes night and day. I felt ready to become a vampire and begin my new life with Edward at times, but like any human, I had doubts, even though I sought his advice on them. He didn't want me to be a vampire already, and if I let him know my sorrow over leaving behind those I love, he would do everything in his power to convince me to stay human.

But the idea of growing old and feeling my body age and ache while Edward remained strong and youthful was too depressing a thought. I didn't doubt Edward's love for me, but I remained haunted by my nightmare of looking like my grandmother and trying to believe that Edward would love and desire me when I looked so far beyond the girl he fell in love with. Just because Edward was okay with the idea of taking care of me one day didn't mean I had to be completely on board. This was my choice to make, and right now all I was doing was overthinking everything like a typical bride on her wedding day. I walked over to my window and looked up at the sky, hoping it wouldn't rain or snow. After all, it was Forks, and any weather could happen regardless of the occasion.

And today was going to be a day like no other...

Jessica Stanley

I had returned to Forks a few days before the wedding in order to get a couple of things done before the big day arrived. I wanted to spend some time with my mom and catch up with her about my new life in California. I was worried about the move; I thought I'd hate my apartment, that I wouldn't be able to pay the rent or make any friends, that I'd struggle to find work and would probably drop out of college.

But as it turns out everything was going really well, much to my complete surprise. I had a part-time job on the corner just down from my apartment building, so travelling wasn't a problem. My boss was nice and flexible about shifts, so I made all of my classes and even found the time to get a few days off and return to Forks for the wedding. I was surprised to get the invitation. Both Edward and Bella were pretty private and shy; neither of them had a lot going on activities-wise back in high school, so I figured they'd have a small private ceremony with just family.

I always got the feeling that Bella looked down on a few of us back in high school. Her silence sometimes would speak volumes, and there was that period of time when the Cullen family left Forks and she didn't talk to us for months. Then, when Edward and his family returned, she pretended like nothing had happened; she wasn't a zombie or a shell of her former self anymore. She didn't even apologise to me for the other events that transpired while the Cullens were gone. The way she acted that night after the movies with that older guy on the motorcycle, she not only put herself in such a dangerous position that night, but she also left me alone in the middle of the street not knowing where she was going.

I never did truly confront her about how terrified I was that night; I didn't even tell my mother about what she had done because it was so beyond her character. Maybe I won't ever say anything to Bella about that night, but deep down I knew I would regret not telling her how upset I was. I know I talked too much at times, and my desire to get the best grades in school did get on a few of my friends' nerves, but this was a completely different situation. Bella and I were two teenage girls in the city that night; anything, and I mean anything, could have happened to one or both of us. I might not be everyone's favourite kind of person, and I wasn't always the greatest friend, but I can say this about myself without a shadow of a doubt in my mind.

I would never abandon a scared friend in a strange city while I went off with a stranger for my own selfish reasons.

It is strange how returning to your home town brings up so many old feelings. Forks seemed smaller now; I wasn't above anyone here; I mean, come on, I lived in a one-bedroom loft and I showered over my own toilet. The last meal I ate before coming home was a microwave meal of Chow Mein that was not only expired but washed down with two-day-old milk.

As disgusting as it sounded, I didn't mind it; I wasn't sleeping rough, and I had enough money to put the heating on in the evening and keep the lights on. That was more than I could say about a few other students in my classes. I knew I was very lucky to be home, and I felt so welcome. I had come home to my mom; she had cooked my favourite meal, and I'd done a load of laundry and caught up on a few of my assignments for next week's classes.

Life was sweet.

Bella Swan

No bride really likes to admit all the little touchups that are necessary on the day their wedding finally rolls around. I had never considered myself to be concerned with vanity, but on my wedding day, I wanted to go the extra mile for myself. I knew deep down that Alice probably had thought of all of these little matters and had planned to assist me with some of the items on this morning's list, but there were a few things I wanted to take care of on my own.

I had prepared a small box of items over the past few weeks during my trips into town for food shopping. Nothing too far out of the ordinary, but all the little things a girl likes to take care of every now and again. I had cooked Charlie a full breakfast this morning, and then he had showered and headed off into town for his haircut. The bathroom had been a mess by the time he was done with all his wedding grooming, and I had spent twenty minutes cleaning up after him, twenty minutes I had not planned on needing.

Now I was pressed for time more than I would have liked, but Alice didn't expect me to arrive until eleven o'clock.

I felt so much better after cleaning the bathroom. I didn't want to work on myself with the sink full of hair, toothpaste on the towels, and damp floor around the floor of the shower. I had taken all the used towels and dumped them all into the hamper, scrubbed the sink, and returned all of Charlie's products to their own shelves.

Of course, being me, I hadn't stopped there; I had also brought in fresh towels, restocked the soap dishes, replaced Charlie's dull razor with a fresh one, and restocked his shower gels. Although it was a pain to focus on this on the morning of the wedding, I didn't mind; come the end of today, Charlie would be coming home alone, and the least I could do was make sure he didn't come back to a messy bathroom. Yes, he had made the mess himself, but the idea of him coming in and having to deal with it when I knew he'd be so wiped out from the day was sad.

I just wanted to make this little last effort to take care of him the way he always took care of me.

At the bathroom sink, I brought my hair up behind my head and tied it back away from my face. First, the teeth whitening strips. No one ever looks good trying to secure these in place; you basically look like you're trying to scare the mirror. Next, I was a dark-haired girl, and there was a lot of hair to take care of. First, I collected my bleaching kit, which I had picked up only yesterday. I worked the paste and began to coat my upper lip with it.

I flicked on the light above the mirror for the next part, grabbing a pair of tweezers to begin all the necessary grooming. Every girl can agree that there is always a lot more hair to pluck than you expected.

After that was done and the worrying about all the redness was over, I threw away all the used products before collecting the next set. I wet my nose with some hot water and applied a pore strip to it before I began searching for any and all blackheads around my face. There were a few, some of which I was concerned Edward was well aware of. I took care of them all before I soaked one of the washcloths in hot water and washed my face. I peeled off my nose strip soon after and took off my teeth whitening strip too. It had worked a treat on my teeth, but I also brushed and flossed them too.

Every girl, sooner or later, wants to make that little extra effort.

Next came my shower, and I found I wasn't too badly pushed for time like I had feared. I managed to wash and condition my hair and apply a hair mask I had bought, leaving it to soak into my hair and work its magic while I proceeded to shave. I did everywhere; the second I started, however, I began to think of how I should have shaved the night before and saved myself all of this mess now. I shaved my legs and underarms before finally rinsing out my hair mask.

I had left my towels warming, so when I stepped out of the shower, I wrapped them around my body and hair immediately to feel toasty warm.

All I had to do now was get dressed and head out.

I never walked so slowly in my life; from the bathroom to my bedroom felt like a mile. I sat on the bottom of my bed with the towel clinging to me and water dripping down my shoulders and onto the bedding below.

I was getting married today, and I wasn't ready to be married.

Jessica Stanley

I stepped out of the pharmacy after picking up some mouthwash and floss when I paused. Across the street, I saw Edward Cullen get out of his Volvo and head into the best and only jewellery store in Forks. He was wearing dark jeans and a grey t-shirt with no jacket; it wasn't cold, but it was jacket weather for sure. I smiled at him, but of course he didn't notice; he never did, even back in high school.

On the day Bella arrived and changed everything, I made it clear to her how much I liked Edward from the very first day, and yet by the end of that day, she was looking at him the way I had been looking at him for months.

With longing. The same longing I had for him now, on the day of his wedding.