Be Vulnerable

It was quiet throughout the cave. The air was thick with tension and sorrow. A pair of sneakers tapped through the halls as their owner steadily making his way to the med bay. He gripped a bouquet of pink camellias tightly, not wanting to see the girl he….likes? loves? adores?...longed for?

And yet, here he was. Dick walked up to the hospital bed and took the vase on the end table. He filled it with water and placed the camellias in. As he turned, he could not hold his tears anymore. Just looking at her so quiet but so helpless shattered his heart.

"Good morning, Zee. Hmm How are you today?" Dick waited for an answer that wasn't coming.

Two weeks ago, the Team was dispatched to Tibet to secure the Phurba, a dagger that could drain human souls and empower the user with god-like abilities. They were too late however, as dark magician Felix Faust had beaten them to the dagger and already drained the souls of a small village. The Team was no matched for an up-charged Faust, but that didn't stop Zatanna from trying. In a last ditched effort, she grabbed the Phurba hoping to pry it from Faust's hands….but ultimately her soul too was lost. Enraged, Robin mindlessly charged at Faust with his bo staff swinging wildly. Luckily for the Boy Wonder, the mystical energy tied to Zatanna's soul started to overwhelm Felix. One man can only hold so much power anyway. Faust clutched his head in pain giving Robin his one window. With his grapple, he snatched the Phurba from Faust's hands and smashed in on the frozen ground freeing all the captured souls. Faust withered into an old man making his capture easy. But Zatanna remained unmoving. Her soul had returned, Robin was sure of it. But there was no response. Only a weak pulse and short breaths came from her mouth. It had been that way ever since.

"Well, the team has been ok, I guess. Wally passed his English test…barely but he passed. I still don't understand how someone who can process things so fast can be so slow in academics. Or maybe he's playing dumb to get Artemis to tutor him. They've been….getting to know each other a lot which is kinda weird to be honest. Arty won't stop worrying about you either though. She comes in almost as often as I do. She keeps meaning to bring you new flowers, but I think she forgets on purpose, still trying to deny what's going on with you. Conner finished that bike he's been working on. He doesn't ride it though which I find odd. Something about Sphere being jealous?"

Dick brushed a lock of hair out of her face and then settled into the stool beside the bed. He sighed looking at the heart rate monitor. While glad the thing still steadily beeped, he wished that stupid machine would be able to give him a sign that she would wake up soon.

"Yea so, M'gann's campaigning for cheerleading captain. She might win it too. All the perkiness and positivity seem to be winning people over. Kaldur is honestly still hurting over losing Tula to his best friend Garth, but Raquel seems to be happy to pick the pieces of his heart up. Not sure if he really sees the hints she's been dropping though. To be honest, I'm not even sure how I would react if someone took you from me…not that you belong to me or anything…."

As he let out a brief awkward chuckle, he leaned back a little to look at the ceiling. His hands got clammy, and he was actually trembling. Maybe it would be ok to…pull back the curtain a little. She was in a coma so she wouldn't be able to hear him right? For two weeks, Dick desperately needed to pour his heart out to someone. The only person he wanted to vent and cry to, was laying in bed in front of him. But she still didn't even know his name…..ah who cares. Who's she gonna tell in this condition?

"I…wish you did belong to me," taking a deep breath, Dick continued, "I don't think I've ever told you this, but we've met before. Or at least, I met you. I was very young. My parents were alive. Mr. Haly was thinking of recruiting your dad to the circus we worked at, so he asked my dad to….scout him out pretty much. My dad saw it as an opportunity for a family outing, so on Children's Day, he took Mom and me to see the great Giovanni Zatara. Little did we know, Zatara wanted to celebrate Children's Day by performing alongside his daughter. I don't actually remember much of the show because I only focused on you. He kept your tricks super simple. Pulling a rabbit out of your hat, making flowers appear from thin air, pulling an endlessly long rag cloth. Cliches sure, but they were magical to me because you were stunning. I'm not sure if you actually used any magic in those tricks, but the ways your eyes shined and the way you smiled. You looked almost relieved that all your practice paid off. My dad brought us backstage hoping to convince your dad of joining our circus. You hid behind Zatara's coat ever so shyly. I waved trying to be friendly but….you didn't see. Ultimately your dad declined, preferring to be his own boss as his own headliner. But I never forgot the name Zatanna Zatara."

His tears started to dry up a little bit as the memory calmed him down. He smiled a little seeing how peaceful Zatanna slept. He rubbed his hands together hoping to wash away a little more of the uneasiness he felt.

"When you and your dad visited the cave for the first time, I instantly knew who you were. I meant to be all smooth and calm when I introduced myself…but I just froze. Years later you still looked beautifully shy even though you turned out to be such a fire cracker hehe. I actually stopped breathing…until I saw M'gann step forward. Instincts took over and I jumped ahead wanting to speak to you first. God you were just amazing. You're so bright, and funny, and we….we just get each other, Zee."

Tears started falling down his cheeks, so he took his sunglasses off and placed them on the table. He tried wiping his eyes a little but that didn't help.

"The past few months have honestly been the happiest time of my life. I wake up every day hoping to see you, or a funny text from you, or just to hear your voice over the phone. Anything. We share something special, Zee. We share a connection. It may have started as a way to comfort each other over our parents, but I feel like I can tell you anything. You understand me in a way not even Wally does sometimes. I also can't help but rush to your side whenever I see you in pain. We prop each other up. We support and encourage each other. I'd do anything for you, Zatanna."

Unable to hold himself back, Dick took Zatanna's hands into his own gripping them gently but firmly. He leaned forward and put her hand on his forehead.

"Zatanna….I love you. I love you so so much. No matter how I'm feeling at any point in time, seeing you washes away all my anger, all my fears. Just being with you makes me the happiest person in the world. It took me a while to realize it but honestly, Zee, I can't live without you."

Tears just poured out of Dick's eyes. Some of them landed on Zatanna's arms…..some of them she felt. Her fingers began to twitch.

"Zee, whenever I stare out at the rain with my heavy heart, and it feels like the end of the world in my mind, your voice pulls me back like a wake-up call. For the longest time, since my parents' death, I've been looking for an answer, somewhere, something to keep me going in life. I couldn't see that it was right there. But right here, right now, I know what I didn't know…"

Finally, Dick looked up holding her hand with one of his and using the other to cup her cheek.

"Because you live and breathe. Because you make me believe in myself when nobody else can help. Because you live, Zatanna, my world has twice as many stars in the sky. So please, Zatanna. Wake up and come back to me. Because if you live, my world has everything I need to survive."

Getting up, Dick placed a soft kiss on Zatnna's forehead silently praying she would wake up soon.

"I have to go now. I'll see you tomorrow. Be safe, Zee. I will always love you."

Once Dick shut the door and left, Zatanna's fingers slowly gripped the bedsheet. Suddenly letting out the breath she had been holding, Zee abruptly opened her eyes. She was dumbfounded. She could not believe what she heard. Once again, that voice seared itself into her brain. That sweet sweet melodic voice pulled her back from whatever dark pit she was in. The voice of her hero, her best friend, of the boy she loved.

"I love you too…Dick."