Be Saucy

It was a late morning on Sunday. Zatanna was in a brunch type of mood, so she decided to make eggs benedict. As she was stirring the hollandaise sauce, a familiar pair of arms snaked around her waist. Her boyfriend lovingly began kissing her shoulder.

"Hiya, honey. Whatcha makin?" he asked.

"Hehe, mornin' hon. I'm making some eggs benedict. Felt like making brunch."

"Oh? Are you gonna share?"

"Haha. Maybe…if you behave," Zatanna answered with that sneaky sultry tone of hers.

Robin, intent to winning this little game of theirs, began moving up towards her neck and gave her a few little love bites.

"Eh, that's ok. I've got my own snack right here," he teased

"Ah Robin! Stop! You're going to ruin my hollandaise! I need to stir properly!"

"Oh? I thought you liked it when I kissed you like this?"

To continue his teasing onslaught, Robin began nibbling her earlobe and tickling her sides.

"Ohh ohhh ok ok! Stop! Stop ahaha right now! Fine Fine! I'll make you a portion just….ahhh stop teasing me!"

"Haha. Gotta say, I love the appetizer. Can't wait for the main course," Robin smirked as he kissed her on the cheek and tapped her on the ass.

"You freakin' tease," Zatanna said as she rolled her eyes.

Finally, brunch was served as Zatanna put down two plates. Each one had a pair of English muffins, stacked with crispy ham, poached eggs, and smothered with the hollandaise sauce that thankfully did not curdle.

"Dig in!"

Zatanna cut open the eggs and watched the runny yolk drip all over the ham and muffin. Using her fork, she scooped up a bite that had egg, ham, and muffin all covered in the sauce and yolk. One bite and she was in heaven. Just the right amount of saltiness from the ham and creaminess from the sauce. Just perfect…..for her anyway. Her boyfriend however did not share the same opinion. Zatanna watched as Robin chewed with a blank expression. He was oddly quiet, and she noticed how he was almost slow to take the next bite.

"Baby? What's wrong? Do you not like it?" Zatanna asked worriedly.

"Huh? Well uh I mean. It's….alright."

"….You hate it don't you?"

"What no not at all!...I just uh….think it….could be better?"

A little annoyed, Zatanna raised her eyebrow and put her fork down.

"Really? How so?"

"Well…..personally I woulda gone with pancetta instead of ham to add some fat. And I feel like you coulda toasted the muffins more. And the uh….sauce is a little bland….and thin."

"Well I mean….the sauce was your fault. But the other stuff is how I always make it! My dad loves this recipe. Are you saying you can do better?"

"Ok I'll take the blame for the sauce, but Zee, let's not fight about this, please?"

"So that means you DO think you can make it better? Hmm alright then discount Gordon Ramsay. How about we make this…..interesting?"

"Zee, I'm really sorry if I offended you. Can't we just kiss and make up?"

"Oh no…..you're not using that sneaky tongue of yours to get out of this one. How about a little friendly wager?"

"….I've got a bad feeling about this."

Later in the day

"LADIES AND GENTLE-SUPES!" announced Wally, "Welcome to the first ever Super Iron Chef Competition! In this corner we have the daring, the bold, the flying Boy Wonder! His opponent today is the stunning, the beautiful, the one who's going to put little Robin in the doghouse regardless of the outcome today, his girlfriend, Zatanna!"

The rest of the Team (and Billy who happened to visit upon hearing the availability of free food) clapped and cheered at the production value of this cooking competition. Robin at one end of the kitchen had on a dark blue T-shirt with a black half apron and a black head band along with his signature sunglasses. Zatanna on the other side had on her lavender tank top, a pair of black leggings, and a red full apron with a big yellow R on the upper left corner (it was on sale and part of her strategy to distract her boyfriend).

"Today! Our lovely contestants will serve our judges a three-course meal. It'll be a free-for-all so they have absolute freedom in what they will be serving. There will be three two-hour rounds. An appetizer, then a main dish, and finally a dessert. Now, is everyone ready to begin?"

"Woohoo!"

"Yea!"

"Go 'Tanna! You got this!"

"Alright! Let the games begin!" Wally exclaimed as he struck a gong.

Robin and Zatanna began moving lightning fast around the kitchen. Robin began cracking eggs and then removing the pits from a bunch of avocados. The Boy Wonder moved with insane precision that only experience could have given him. Agent A was one hell of teacher. Zatanna on the other hand moved a little more slowly cracking her own eggs and opening her jars of crab meat. To keep things fair, Zatanna agreed to avoid using magic at all costs….though no one really saw her cross her fingers behind her back. The stakes were pretty high in this competition.

At the end of the first two hours, appetizers are served. Robin went first.

"For my first dish, I present to you an avocado shrimp quiche. Enjoy!"

Everyone began digging in savoring all the flavors of the quiche. Billy scarfed down the whole thing in five bites and was immensely satisfied.

"Dang Rob! This is soooo good," said Wally as he cleaned his plate in seconds.

"Mmhmm. Boy Wonder you really can cook!" complimented Raquel.

"While I agree for the most part, this dish is a touch too oily for me," said Artemis

Conner just shrugged, "It's alright."

Next up was Zatanna's dish.

"Here I have for you today is a crab cake and arugula salad! Buon appetito!"

The crunch of the crispy crab cake could be heard all over the cave. The smell filled everyone's noses and had them drooling at the mouth.

"Zatanna! This is amazing! So much better than my foster mom's!...please don't tell her."

"I concur with Billy. This has a better balance of flavor and richness. Fantastic job."

"Kaldur's right. This is better. Points for Zatanna!", Artemis chimed in.

Conner nodded in agreement.

"Looks like Zatanna takes the appetizer round!"

Zatanna couldn't help but smirk at her boyfriend.

"Ha! Take that!"

"Heh. It's still early. We've got two more courses to go, sweetie," Robin answered as he stuck his tongue out.

For the main course, Robin began slicing some duck breasts and had two saucepans going at once. Zatanna began seasoning her steaks and mashing potatoes.

"Say, what did Robin and Zatanna bet on anyway?" asked Billy.

"Beats me. They've been pretty secretive about it. Artemis, did Zatanna say anything?"

"Nope. I got nothin, Raquel. It's probably something weird though."

"My guess, Zatanna gets to saw him in half for a magic trick."

"No way, M'gann, I bet Robin will have to teach her combat tricks."

"Arty please, it's so obvious. It's a weird sex thing."

"Wally please! There are children present. Conner, could you pass the Scooby Snax?"

As Conner poured some gummies into Kaldur's hand, everyone just stared at the odd pair.

"No seriously, how the hell do you two always have those on hand?" Raquel asked angrily.

"And why don't you share?" Billy asked.

"Billy no snacks before dinner. And you guys too! Seriously!"

After M'gann chastised them, Conner tucked the Scooby Snax back into his pocket. For a brief second, both Robin and Zatanna chuckled knowing exactly why Conner seemingly had a perpetual supply of the gummies. However, said supply should be running low very soon.

The main courses were ready to be served. This time, Zatanna went first.

"Here we've got a simple dish. Ribeye steak with mashed potatoes and candied carrots! Buon appetito!"

The judges began cutting into their steaks. Unfortunately, some had it easier than others.

"Zatanna, uh this steak is a little tough," Billy said.

"Yea. Sorry girl, I'm more a medium type of gal. But this is more on the well-done side," Raquel critiqued

"What? But I totally made sure these were all medium! I even did the touch test and everything!"

"The mash potatoes are good though. Really soft," Artemis said trying to salvage her friend's confidence.

Zatanna gathered up the plates dejectedly hoping Robin's dish fared worse. Unfortunately for her, Robin pulled out the big guns.

"Today, we've got seared duck breast with a pair of sauces. One is an orange blossom sauce, and the other is a red wine reduction sauce. On the side we have some lightly salted grilled asparagus. Enjoy!"

A series of loud crunches could be heard as everyone cut into the crispy duck skin. The saltiness of the duck paired beautifully with the tanginess of the two sauces. The asparagus provided just enough lightness to make the dish complete.

"Robin this is fantastic. Well done my friend!" exclaimed Kaldur

"Damn Robin, you a Masterchef in your own right! This is soooo good!" Raquel shouted.

"Seriously guys, can I eat here more often? My foster mom is great but this is like out of this world!"

"Welp that settles it," Wally announced, "Robin takes round 2!"

Robin pumped his first in the air and blew a kiss to Zatanna.

"Take that, honey!"

"You're just lucky I left the pan too hot and overcooked these steaks. They were perfectly seasoned!"

"Haha. We'll see, Babe. We'll see soon enough."

The final round, dessert began with a flurry as the two competitors were eager to break the tie. Both were cracking eggs and whisking them without abandon. Robin looked like he was making some sort of custard while Zatanna looked set on baking a cake.

"So, who do yall want to win?" asked Billy.

"Well, we gotta back out girl up don't we, Arty?"

"You bet, Raquel. I'd honestly love to see Boy Blunder get knocked down a peg."

From the kitchen, Zatanna whipped her head around in anger.

"DON'T CALL HIM THAT! He hates that nickname!"

Artemis was taken aback by the fierceness in Zatanna's tone.

"Ok ok! Sorry."

"Dang, Zatanna's protective of her man…even in a heated competition."

"Not really surprising though, is it Raquel?" Conner asked.

"I'm guessing you guys are rooting for Robin?" Billy changed the subject.

"You bet!" answered Wally, "He's my best friend. Ride or die!"

"Conner and I are also cheering for a victory for Robin. As he would put it. We are….Day One OGs."

As the clock was winding down, Zatanna opened the oven to check her cakes with a chopstick. Unfortunately, the center was not baked at all. It was still too doughy.

"What? Why?...Oh shit the oven's not hot enough."

She looked at the clock realizing her cake could not bake fully in time. Robin was already pulling his dessert out of the oven, and he looked too satisfied to her liking. Shifting a little to hide the cake, she waved her hand and whispered a quick spell.

"Ekac, ekab ot noitcefrep." (Cake, bake to perfection).

She knew she "promised" not to use magic, but this may be her only chance to redeem this prize of hers. Satisfied with her cake, she began dressing it with icing.

Finally, the final buzzer rang. Robin and Zatanna were ready to serve their final dishes. Robin stepped forward.

"I thought we'd finish off lightly with a hint of decadence. Here, we've got a lemon crème brûlée. Allow me to torch the sugar."

With a blowtorch, Robin carefully burned the sugars of each ramekin creating a dark brown crust.

"Enjoy!"

Again, more crunches could be heard as everyone started breaking the crust and digging into the sweet dessert.

"Robin you are a god! We are not worthy! We are not worthy!" Billy began bowing at Robin's feet.

"Seriously, Rob? Where in the hell did you learn how to cook? And can you please teach me?"

"Haha, my grandfather taught me, Arty. He was pretty strict, but I learned a lot of skills from him."

"Rob seriously man. You've been holding out on us. Why order pizza and wings when you can cook like this?!" Wally chastised.

Zatanna started sweating bullets. She honestly thought Robin was all talk with his cooking skills, but today really showed her that he was such a perfect catch. She was honestly…..really turned on even though she was the opponent in this competition. Unconsciously, she started licking her lips….and not because of the desserts on the table.

"Zatanna! Earth to Zatanna!" M'gann said waving her hands, "Zatanna! You're up!"

"Huh? Oh right! Sorry!"

Hurriedly, Zatanna grabbed her plates and served everyone.

"Ok well, Robin may have brought some tartness, but I brought the saltiness. Here, I've got a soft fluffy peanut butter chocolate cake with a sprinkle of sea salt and a little pretzel bite. Buon appetito!"

Everyone was amazed at how smoothly their forks cut the cake. The pieces melted in their mouths and an explosion of peanut butter and chocolate all left them dazed. You could even call this cake…..magical.

"HOLY SHIT ZATANNA! THIS IS SOOO GOOD!"

"Billy! Watch your mouth! But honestly, Zatanna, this is amazing! How….how did you pull this off!"

"Oh M'gann stop haha. It's just an old family recipe."

No one else really commented as they all just could not stop eating. They were in such a trance that Robin and Zatanna were actually a little concerned.

"Uhh guys? It can't be that good can it?" Robin worriedly asked.

"Rob, buddy, I love you. You're my best friend, but this cake is out of this world."

"I concur with Wally. This cake is nothing short of magical."

Robin raised his eyebrow at Kaldur's comment. He gave Zatanna a quick glare, but she didn't notice. Deciding to be a gentleman, he kept his revelation to himself.

"Welp. Looks like we have our winner," Wally announced as he ran over to raise Zatanna's hand, "Zatanna wins the first ever Super Iron Chef Competition!"

"Woohoo! Goo 'Tanna!"

"Yea!"

"In your face Bird Brains!"

Graciously, Robin clapped his hands and gave Zatanna a peck on her cheek.

"Great job, honey. Guess you win!"

"Haha, thanks, baby. Can't wait to collect tonight haha."

As Zatanna winked at her boyfriend, realization hit Wally.

"Oh my god. IT IS A WEIRD SEX THING!"

"WALLY!"

Later that night, when everyone retreated to their bedrooms (and Billy took home a bunch of leftovers), Zatanna was laying in bed wearing her usual Robin sweatpants and tank top waiting for her boyfriend to join her. Robin walked in, drying his hair with a towel, and also wearing a pair of sweatpants. Zatanna patted her bed, beckoning her boyfriend forward.

"I know you cheated."

"Did I? Maybe I'm just better," Zatanna said coyly trying to feign ignorance.

"Do I really have to do this without a shirt?"

"Absolutely. You agreed to the wager."

"Sigh. Ok. Anything for you."

Robin tossed his towel into the hamper and crawled into bed. This time however, he rolled and faced away from Zatanna, allowing her to hug him from behind and be the big spoon for the first time. She pulled the covers over them and her hands….began to roam.

"Getting touchy aren't you?"

"Hey now. You're always big spoon. Not my fault you're too gentlemanly to cop a feel. And besides, now that you're healed, I get to squeeze as much as I want," she declared as she squeezed his pecs.

"Har har very funny."

Zatanna kissed his neck and nibbled his ear a little.

"I promise, Baby, when you earn it….I'll dress up in matching uniforms with you for a week like you wanted. I bet I look good as Robin, Girl Wonder haha. But for now….this is my prize hehe."

"Sigh. I love you."

"Love you more!"

As Zatanna rubbed her nose into his hair, she picked up a familiar scent.

"Hey…..you used my shampoo!"