Be Persuasive

"WALLACE RUDOLPH WEST WHERE ARE YOU!?"

Artemis stormed into the cave clearly demanding blood. Her screams of war jolted Zatanna in the kitchen causing her to almost drop her grape soda.

"Artemis? What's going on? Are you ok?"

"No, Zatanna. I am not! My soon-to-be-dead boyfriend has royally fucked up big time."

"What'd he do now?"

"I stayed up all night working on my Vietnamese lit paper and the dumbass zoomed into the living room spilling his goddamn milkshake on my laptop. The thing sparked and pretty much lost me my paper. He then just took off with my goddamn laptop! I need to know where he is so I can rip his head off."

"Uhh shouldn't you be rewriting your paper or something though?"

"I already emailed the prof begging for an extension. She wasn't happy about it, but I managed to score an extra two days."

"Ok well. Wally's not here. It's just Dick and me. He's in the lab working on some techy thing that I don't fully understand."

"Wait…Dick's here?"

"Yea. Why?"

"Come with me."

The girls made their way to the cave's tech lab to find Dick on the work bench. He was wearing goggles as he disassembled his Robin gauntlet and used a soldering gun to attach new wires to different circuit boards. Zatanna tapped him on the shoulder to get his attention.

"Huh? Hey, babe. Artemis? What are you doing here?"

"Cut the shit, Bird Brains. Where. Is. He?" Artemis snarled.

"…..You're gonna have to be more specific Arty. Where's who?"

"You know damn well who. Where is my dumbass boyfriend?"

"Why would I know where Wally is? I've been with Zee all day."

"It's true. He really has…..although…We only really moved to the cave when you got that message on your phone."

"Well, what were you two doing before?"

"We were watching a documentary on koalas when Dick got a mysterious text. He then said he had to go to the cave to update his gear…..Come to think of it, why do we need to be in the cave? Can't you update your Robin stuff back at the Batcave?"

If Dick felt worried by this line of questioning, he did not show it at all. His demeanor was calm and collected. Though there were some beads of sweat starting to form.

"Eh. I didn't want to hog the Batcomputer in case Bruce needed it. Thought we could come here instead."

"Wait….there was a gust of wind when we arrived…..WALLY WAS HERE…..AND YOU KNOW WHY!" Zatanna exclaimed.

"Alright spill bird brains! Where is he!"

"….I'LL NEVER TELL YOU! I WOULD NEVER SELL OUT MY BEST FRIEND! NEVER I SAY! I WILL NEVER CRACK! DO YOUR WORST!"

"…..Tanna sic'em."

Zatanna slowly sauntered over to her boyfriend. Her hips swayed as she approached him. Gently, she took off his work googles and stroked his cheek. She grabbed a handful of his hair and pulled him into a hot and passionate kiss. He tried to pull away, but Zatanna locked him in place. As she deepened the kiss and pried his mouth open to stick her tongue in, Dick started to melt and give into the kiss. He tried once again to break free, but Zatanna retaliated by hugging him closer and raising her left leg. Instinctively, he grabbed her thigh, and the two just continued living in their own little bubble. Artemis patiently crossed her arms…and then impatiently started tapping her foot. She checked her watch and saw that two minutes had passed. By the fifth minute, it was starting to get uncomfortable.

"Zatanna?"

Zatanna caressed Dick's cheek.

"Zatanna…..?"

It got really weird when Dick's hand began traversing down Zatanna's back and onto her ass. Artemis finally felt that this was enough…. coercing.

"Zatanna! That's enough!"

*POP*

Finally, the horny couple released each other's lips and Dick put her leg down. Zatanna smirked knowing she had her boyfriend melting in the palm of her hands. Dick had a goofy grin as he dizzily pulled himself together.

"He has my credit card and is at BestBuy looking for a new laptop for you. In the meantime, I've been running a recovery program on your hard drive looking for your paper."

He walked around the corner and pressed a key on the big cave computer. A green progress bar appeared with the words "Recovery Complete." Dick typed a few words and Artemis's Vietnamese lit paper popped up.

"Here's your paper safe and sound. I recovered your other personal items and other assignments too. We made a quick exchange here at the cave when Zee wasn't looking. He slipped me your laptop's hard drive and I gave him my card."

Artemis was stunned at how far Wally was willing to go to help her. She remained quiet for a second before softening her glare.

"Oh…well. Thanks Dick."

"Of course…..go easy on him though, kay?"

With that, Artemis took her hard drive and recovered assignments and Zeta'd back to her California home.

"Y'know, you shoulda let me in on the plan. I coulda helped."

"Eh. Wally swore me to secrecy. He kinda wanted to surprise Arty with a new laptop and everything."

"Oh well. It's sweet the lengths you two go for each other…..however….."

"However?"

"….However, it's equally as nice to know I can extract anything I want from you."

"Oh? Really now?"

"Mmhmm. I can be quite convincing."

"I'm not so sure….maybe you need to…convince me a little more."

"Ah I see now. Looks like I need to hit you with…BOTH of my...assets."

Just as Zatanna was undoing the buttons on her blouse, Dick's phone rang.

"Ugh sorry…..I should probably get this."

"It's ok, I'll be right here," replied Zatanna as she rubbed her hand on his thigh.

"Hello?"

"Yes, Mr. Grayson. This is American Express. We have detected what could be a fraudulent charge on your credit card. As a precaution, we have frozen all funds unless we can confirm that you are making the purchase."

"Uhh, yea that should be me. But uh…how much is the charge?"

Dick immediately stood up jolting Zatanna slightly. His eyes widened and he clenched his fist in anger. Zee felt concerned and tightly held his arm in case she needed to support him.

"Uh huh. Yea. Ok. Give me a second and let me call you back."

After he hung up, Dick quickly dialed his next call.

"Baby, what's wrong?"

"Hang on, Zee."

After a couple seconds of the ring tone, someone finally picked up. Before said person could answer, Dick screamed in pure rage.

"WALLY, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU BUYING FOR 77,000 DOLLARS AT BESTBUY!?"