Notes: At the request of readers, I skipped the remaining chapters on Jane. There is a flashback in this chapter. The second half of this chapter deals with Kitty's health. I hope to post it tomorrow.
Part IV
April 1813
Standing on the top of Mount Oakham, Elizabeth's vision caught a ray of light travelling down the valley casting Longbourn in a warm glow. The peaceful sight was in stark contrast to her contemplations of all the heartbreaking changes that had taken place over the past few months.
Her life had been busy since her father's passing. The responsibility of running the estate became her burden, and she willingly took it on. Still, the loss of her father overwhelmed her at times and left her longing for his presence to help carry the load.
Despite her uncle's and mother's support, she was concerned about making the wrong decision. A mistake could potentially jeopardize her family's financial stability. These fears lingered constantly in the back of her mind, causing her to doubt her abilities. To her family, she made sure to project a confident appearance.
In early January, Jane embarked upon an indefinite sojourn to the Gardiner residence. Jane's body healed, but her mind remained ensnared in a labyrinth of disquiet and melancholy. One particular memory, etched with profound sorrow, resurfaced in Elizabeth's thoughts – a poignant conversation, one of their last. Jane, perched upon the edge of her bed, her gaze fixated upon an unseen point in space, tears in her eyes. Sensing Jane's distress, Elizabeth, her heart heavy with apprehension, ventured closer and inquired with tender concern, "What happened? Are you well?"
Startled by the unexpected presence of Elizabeth in the bedroom, Jane hurriedly brushed away her tears and managed to respond, "Yes, Lizzy. Fret not, I assure you I am well."
Elizabeth seated herself beside Jane, and gentle squeezed Jane's hand. Her gaze held a profound blend of concern and empathy, silently conveying her unwavering support and understanding. After a momentary pause, Jane exhaled a sigh laden with melancholy and confessed, "Truth be told, I find myself in a state of disarray, questioning the very essence of my being."
With conviction, Elizabeth asserted, "You are my elder sister; you are my dear friend…"
Elizabeth's words were abruptly cut short by Jane's interjection, "No, Lizzy, you must understand that everything has irrevocable changed. I am not even your real sister..."
Elizabeth's voice rose in desperation, "Jane, I implore you, look at me!"
Reluctantly, Jane raised her tear-filled eyes to meet Elizabeth's gaze. Elizabeth continued, her voice resonating with a profound tenderness, "Despite you learned the truth, you are the same. In my heart, you will always be my sister." After a pause, Elizabeth added, "I love you, Jane. Everyone at Longbourn loves you, and that will never change."
In a comforting embrace, Elizabeth held Jane close, allowing the moments to stretch until the turmoil within Jane gradually subsided. As the tension abated, Elizabeth inquired, "Are you certain that you desire to stay at your Uncle Gardiner's house?"
"Indeed, Lizzy. I want to forge a deeper connection with him and leave the confines of Longbourn, a chance to escape the memories that haunt my mind. My heart is laden with confusion and sorrow." A profound sadness clouded Jane's features as she continued, her voice barely a whisper, "It has been an arduous struggle to come to terms with the revelation that my own mother was a person of questionable moral character. The realization that she never held any affection for me has left a profound mark within my soul. I am here solely due to your mother's act of benevolence. I cannot help but yearn for your mother to be my real mother!"
"My mother cherishes you with an affection as deep and abiding as if you were her own flesh and blood, and you reciprocate that love…"
Several days later, Mr. Gardiner arrived in Longbourn. After engaging in a protracted and exhaustive conversation with his cousin, Mrs. Bennet, lasting more than two hours, concerning Jane's emotional and mental state, he departed with Jane for London.