Once again, we meet Chris McLean standing at the Dock of Shame, wearing his usual dark blue shirt, khaki shorts and sandals. The host smirk on his face implies trouble for twenty two teens who no longer inhabit this locale. "Last time on Total Drama Island… Owen and Gwen battled it out for one hundred thousand dollars in the most exciting finale you've ever seen! Love was found, tears were shed, and at the end of the day, my suit was ruined! Seriously, not cool."

He folds his arms with a pout, but quickly changes his tune. "It was a close race, but Owen emerged the victor with the help of some brownies, making him Total Drama's first winner ever! Gwen came in a close second, and right now is enjoying herself along with all twenty-one of the other vic- I mean, campers at Playa Des Losers, where Owen is throwing a swanky party before everyone goes home and moves on with their lives. What they don't know is that I still have one more epic prize in store for them. Curious to see what it is? Then don't go away, because you're about to find out on the most special episode ever of…

Total!

Drama!

Island!"

The theme song plays over an intro sequence.

The first shot depicts Wawanakwa in full, leading up to a giant cliff and zooming past McLean as he sips a coffee before diving into the water below the cliff.

Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doing fine.

You guys are on my mind.

We see Ezekiel under water, watching Geoff and Bridgette with a downtrodden look on his face, both of which are staring longingly into each other's eyes until an eagle picks Geoff up by his shoulders and carries him off. Bridgette tries to reach for him, watching him fly away with concern.

You asked me what I wanted to be and now I think the answer is plain to see

I wanna be famous.

The eagle drops Geoff down as it soars past the sun. He falls down a few tree branches before landing in DJ's arms, who seconds prior was enjoying nature and the copious animals around him. The animals get violent and attack as soon as their peace is disturbed. DJ and Geoff scream as the former runs with the latter in his arms away from the vicious animals.

Duncan laughs hysterically at the scene, but Courtney glares at him with disapproval, causing him to stop.

I wanna live close to the sun

So pack your bags cause I already won.

Heather is in a canoe with Beth and LeShawna going down the stream. Beth is in the middle, trying to separate the two from dueling. The canoe ends up careening off of the stream and down a waterfall, which makes the teens fall to the water below, passing by Harold as he practices a few fighting poses on a dangerously positioned log overlooking the falls. As he stretches his arms and legs out in a dorky position, Izzy swings in on a vine and knocks into him, bumping directly into an outhouse housing Lindsay, who falls out with her skirt around her ankles.

Everything to prove

Nothing in my way

I'll get there one day

Cause I wanna be famous.

Inside the mess hall kitchen, we see Chef preparing some disgusting green soup with his bare hand dipped into the pot. He looks behind him at a tied up Owen and Noah, both looking petrified of whatever Chef is concoting for them. In the mess hall itself, Eva arm wrestles Tyler, easily beating him and dislocating his arm.

Outside on the beach, Sadie and Katie coo over Justin, who is looking at himself in between two mirrors. He winks at one, his teeth glistening.

Na-na-na-na-na-na

Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na

We get a good look at the polluted, muggy, teal waters of Wawanakwa, a few seagulls fighting over a cellphone. Katie swims for it, with Sadie watching from the sand anxiously, but the skinny brown clone of her best friend ends up being terrorized by a shark and swims back to shore as fast as she can.

I wanna be, I wanna be

I wanna be famous!

Back on the dock of shame, we see Justin strut to the edge before ripping his shirt off, water from the shark splashing towards Katie drenching his perfectly chiseled muscles. He flexes as the camera goes up and transitions from day to night, then comes back down at the campfire ceremony.

I wanna be, I wanna be

I wanna be famous!

Trent is playing his guitar for Gwen, who is entranced by him. He leans forward, a warm smile on his face. As they inch closer, Cody gets between them and places a hand on both of their shoulders, smiling dorkily. The rest of the cast whistles the chorus of the theme song as the camera zooms out to capture them all sitting around the bonfire. The logo appears above them.

Total Drama Island:

The Creeps Cut

Created by VoiceFromUnderTheCovers and Crimson Candy.

Playa Des Losers is embroidered in a sunbeam blanket, tropical beach music playing on the speakers on the hotel wall. At the beach on the west side of the small island, DJ and Geoff oppose each other, tossing a football back and forth in front of a flannel red and black picnic mat sat on by a basket of assorted foods and three girls in bikinis, Bridgette, Courtney and Gwen. A bunny rabbit belonging to DJ sits in Bridgette's lap munching on a piece of celery.

"You finally finished Twilight?" Gwen asks, a repulsed look on her face.

"Yeah! I never saw any of the movies even as a kid because my dad used to say 'those movies suck, Bridge." The blonde surfer girl replies with a deep imitation of her father. "He was right. The book is cliche, cheesy and excessively hammy."

Gwen laughs. "Absolutely. I was a Harry Potter kid growing up, unfortunately."

"I didn't have any interest in that one. Did you ever read The Color Purple?" Bridgette asks.

"Oh yeah, for a school project. Rough read, not bad though." Gwen replies.

Bridge leans forward with her hands on Gwen's lap. "Right? Oh, but…"

As the girls continue their chat, Courtney looks down at her balled up fist, feeling a spiky, bulky little skull trinket in her coffee tinted hand. A frown decorates her face. Bridgette taps her shoulder.

"Huh?"

"I said, you read The Notebook, right Court?" Bridgette cocks her head. Courtney slowly blinks.

"Oh.. yeah. Way back. I re-read it too. It's a beautiful story. Well written. Perhaps a little.. Unrealistic."

The surfer raises her eyebrow. "Unrealistic? You were praising it as a subversion of tropes, a hopeful picture of a better tomorrow, a classy tale of teenage romance!"

"Yeah.. I did say that." Courtney says, voice withdrawn. Bridgette frowns and hugs her knees as Bunny jumps off of her lap and digs through the picnic basket. Gwen looks at her with an intrigued stare.

"Something wrong, babe?" Bridgette asks.

Courtney takes a deep breath in. "I… Okay, I'll tell you guys, if you promise not to tell anyone." Both girls nod in response. Courtney swallows. "...To tell you the truth, it's not just one thing. There's a lot on my mind. The lawsuit, for starters."

"What do you hope to gain from Chris anyways? Heather threatened to sue too and I seriously doubt that's going anywhere." Gwen asks. Courtney squints her eyes at her.

"I was robbed out of the competition. Rigged out. I deserve compensation, at least half of the prize money's worth."

"Good luck with that." Gwen replies.

"Okay, well, what else?" Bridgette presses.

"Well.. there's Duncan, too." Courtney holds the skull close to her chest, her arms folded over her body to close herself off.

"What about him? I thought you two patched things up when he came back?" Gwen asks.

She tenses her fists, tan knuckles turning white as Gwen's sickly skin tone. "It's not about anything from the past. It's this thing with my parents - they don't approve of him. They hate him, in fact. They want me to break up with him before I go back home."

"Well if everything's peachy between you two, I say screw 'em. You're almost eighteen, Courtney, your parents can't control your life forever." Gwen replies. The CIT hangs her head.

"I know."

Bridgette hesitates. "Is.. everything peachy? You guys haven't talked to each other much today."

She bites her bottom lip. "...That's the other thing."

"Uh oh." Gwen says.

"Go on." Bridgette nods. Courtney turns to the side slightly, taking a deep breath in.

"Last night, when me and Duncan were cuddling.. He tried to initiate intimacy."

"Wait… you guys haven't had sex before?"

Courtney shakes her head. "I am very careful of pregnancy and disease. He told me he went to the doctor in the medical bay for a test, and he came back negative. Great - there are no condoms in the spa hotel or anywhere in his pockets. I said no. It was… really awkward after that."

"Did he accept your response?" Bridgette quizzes.

"Of course. He would never force me to do something I don't want to. That's why I can't break up with him. That and.. Obviously I like him. I don't wanna just give him up forever. But… What am I supposed to do? Honestly I've been so stressed lately that I didn't even feel anything when he asked me to lay with him. I just wanna go home."

Gwen taps her chin, opening her mouth to respond before a deep, warm voice takes her out of her thoughts. "Gwen!" Trent exclaims, running up from the ocean in his swim trunks, his built, toned, clearly worked on body glimmering in the wetness of the water he soaked in. His fist is clenched, his hair running down his face, his eyes locked on her eagerly. Gwen sighs dreamily, immediately forgetting what was being discussed.

"Heyy, babe." Gwen greets, sitting on her knees to get closer to him. Geoff and DJ watch as Trent hunches down and releases his fist, revealing an assortment of eight seashells with band logos painted on them, from The Cure to Disturbed. Gwen's eyes light up, her lips forming into a smile. He kneels down to her level.

"I think I'm getting the hang of this whole painting thing." Trent says, grinning at her. She holds the shells securely in both of her hands, smiling lovingly before pulling him in by the shoulders for a sweet, deep kiss. Courtney looks away while DJ and Geoff fist bump and Bridgette cooes.

"I love them! Great work on the illustrations too. We'll do some more lessons tonight, if you're up for it."

"You know I am."

"Get back out there and 'make it up to me.'"

"You know I will." He winks at her, ruffling her dyed hair before waving at her friends, who in turn wave back, though Bridgette is much more friendly-faced than her best friend. As he walks away, DJ and Geoff dap him up.

"Make what up to you?"

"It's this cute thing he does where he makes stuff up to me for our rough start. Painting seashells, getting the door for me, unclipping my bra." Gwen snarls that last line, with Bridgette shaking her head amusedly at the line. Courtney brushes her arm with her hand, sitting small by Bunny. Bridgette moves toward her, sitting by her side as Gwen pulls out a sandwich.

"Is it.. Is it also because of the money, Courtney?" The surfer questions.

"You mean the competition money?" Courtney asks.

Bridgette nods.

"Of course. I lost out on a hundred thousand dollars because of some geek's revenge fantasy against my boyfriend. I didn't even do anything to deserve it. It was Duncan's fault I was targeted." She folds her arms, her face reading bitter.

"I see.." Bridgette runs a hand over her chin.

(Confessional: Bridgette)

"Courtney's clearly not in a good place, and I'm not one to defend Duncan, but it's not his fault Harold cheated. Besides, Courtney probably wouldn't have won the competition anyways considering how tyrannical Heather was during the merge. Don't tell her I said that, okay?"

(Confessional end)

In the pool by the tiki bar manned by a swimsuit wearing Chef Hatchet, Justin poses for Sadie and Katie's pink, sticker covered smartphones, flashing cameras penetrating his hunky abs and lighting up the moist, wet, tan skin that glistened perfectly in the UV rays shining down from the heavens. The girls can't stop smiling.

"You know, ladies, when the competition is over, I'm thinking about going into foot modeling." Justin starts.

"Oh really?" Sadie gushes.

"I did that for a while!" Katie exclaims before catching Sadie's side eye. "Oh, but you'd be so much more classy about it, Justin!"

"Aha, I always thought it was freaky, but the money's good and.. well, Jesus, my dermatologist, says that my grippers are one of the most popular aspects of my body. Can you believe that?" He slips one foot out of the pool, water dripping down his red heel and perfectly chiseled toes. Both girls watch in hypnotic suggestion, their phones dropping in the water before they cover him in a group hug. He goes wide eyed, looking between both of them.

"We so can, Justin! You have the first foot I've ever seen on a guy that gets me wet." Katie hisses, her breath hitting his perfect, smooth skin. He twitches.

"Step on me, Justin..~" Sadie muses, drawing a line down his chest with one finger. Justin shoves both of them into the water with a shiver.

"Uh, ladies, I think my stomach is rumbling.. You wanna fetch me a hotdog?"

"Okay!" They bark in unison, standing up and running out of the pool to find their God a wiener. He sighs, sitting at the bar before spotting Beth sitting on a deckchair across from him, next to Lindsay and Tyler. Beth smears sunscreen on her pale, freckled legs, but looks up to find Justin's perfect blue orbs upon hearing him whistle. He winks at her, flexing a bicep. She blushes heavily, her entire face coated in red before she attempts a wave back.

"L-Lindsay..!" Beth whispers, eyes locked on Justin but body floating towards her bestie, who is currently underneath her klutz boyfriend as he leg and lip locks her. She taps on his chest, signaling him to stop. He pulls his lips off of her mouth and attacks her neck instead.

"Y-yeah Be-ooh, Tyler~!" Lindsay moans, hands rubbing his shoulders affirmably.

She turns to her bestie excitedly. "Justin just winked at me..!"

"Wow.. that's… oh my gosh~" Lindsay grabs Tyler's cheeks and rubs her thigh against his hips as he nibbles down on her sensitive skin, melting in her chair. Beth frowns at the couple before pulling out a little notebook and pencil. Opening it to a far-in page, she begins jotting:

"Dear diary. Today, Justin Reid winked at me. The Justin Reid! Admittedly, I've been feeling kinda lonely recently. My mom told me that my braces are coming off at the orthodontists tomorrow, so hopefully I have a chance to ask Mr. Supermodel out on a real life actual date! I've never been so excited before. Then I think, why would Justin pick me? Maybe he just blinked out some dust in my general direction, or he's bad at blinking, or he's using morse code with his eyes to say T, as in trease leave me alone."

Sourly she slumps her shoulders and looks at the floor.

"Broken hearted, Beth." She closes the book, looking back up at Lindsay. "Lindsay, can I ask you a question?"

"Mmhhmm..!~" Lindsay humps, bucking rhythmically with Tyler.

"Oh, Lindsay.." Tyler moans between kisses.

"How did you decide that Tyler was right for you?"

Tyler stops, a noticeable, purple hickey left on his girlfriend's neck. He looks into Lindsay's eyes, licking his lips before answering Beth. "Well, for me anyway, the first time I saw Lindsay, she was the prettiest girl I ever saw. Plus, she's the first girl to ever treat me how I want to be treated, instead of laughing at me when I trip up or dating my 'friend' Brent Devons. That guy was a total tool! But not my Lindsay. She's like… the opposite of a tool."

Lindsay's brain makes an instant connection and she gasps. "I'm your toy?! Awwwwww! That's so cute!" She squeezes him into a hug, his head dopily positioned under her chin, cheek nuzzling her. Lindsay turns to Beth as she rubs his back. "Well, Tyler's the first boy who's ever been true to me. He doesn't use me for popularity or get embarrassed when I ask him to hold my bags or even ask to see my boobs. He's sooooo sweet, and I love him for that!" She kicks her feet against his legs as the warmest smile in the world dawns on her face. Tyler purrs like a happy lap cat in her arms. Beth smiles too.

"Heh.. that is really adorable. I wonder if my man is just beyond the horizon…" She taps her bottom lip with her eraser, gazing into the sky.

Just then, Harold walks past her, holding a scrapbook following a disinterested Noah covering his ears as he runs his mouth. "...And that's why beavers shouldn't be considered members of the vermin family. Their skeletal structures are like, totally different from rats." Noah points a finger gun at his temple and fires with his mouth, finally turning to Harold. "I mean, just look at their teeth! I can loan you my journal where I've made a bunch of drawings of beavers and rats if you promise not to get food on it and stuff."

"No thanks, I'm good." Noah replies, as dry as possible. He tries to walk away, but Harold simply follows him. He stops, putting his hand out. "Don't you have a girlfriend to annoy?"

"My luscious LeShawna? Unfortunately, we're no longer together. But I'll win her back, one day." Suddenly, Harold's lips start quivering and he falls to his knees, crying his eyes out. Noah sighs, rolling his eyes before walking away from the pathetic nerd. He stands next to Cody, who's currently grilling a steak in his bathing suit, his skin creamy with sunblock.

"Seems like you learned from last time." Noah slaps Cody's shoulder.

"Noaaaahhh, buddy, pal, my best friend! How's life?" Cody greets.

"Riveting as always." Noah replies, waving at Owen from afar as he dances with Izzy to the crazy beach music on the boombox. "How are things with Cindy?"

"Oh, dude, we are so on! Like, level three LDR on! But it gets better."

Noah folds his arms, catching a hint of the barbecue smell wafting into the air. "Please, spare me the grossifying details."

"No, dude, I haven't seen her nips yet. I'm talkin' about Kimberly." Cody nudges his arm with an elbow, smirking suggestively.

"That chick who sent you a video message from middle school? That Kimberly?" Noah raises a brow.

Cody nods. "The very same."

"What about her?"

"Dude, I've had like, an entire summer to think about things, and honestly? We have a date tomorrow." Cody confesses.

"A date? Woah, woah, woah, you better not be thinking about juggling two chicks." Noah questions.

"Not even!" Cody squeaks.

"Uh-huh. so what about Cindy?"

"Dude, long distance is basically a non commitment. Cindy'll move on! These LDR's are about as important to chicks as a chipped nail. They're chicks, man, they'll find a new guy like that." The pencil necked dork snaps his fingers for emphasis.

"Somehow you're the douchiest person I've talked to all day." Noah states.

"What, you're not even a little happy for me?" Cody asks, a little deflated.

"Not really. Cindy's my friend." Noah rolls his eyes, looking to the side.

"Well, hey, you're my best friend.. So think you could keep this between us?" Cody whispers, looking around for any cameras. Poor Cody.

"Whatever. You're gonna get caught eventually."

"...Come on, Noah, who wouldn't juggle two chicks when they're both total hotties?!"

Noah is caught off guard, looking at his supposed best friend. "You've.. Seen her face?"

"Answer the question, Noah!"

The bookworm scoffs in annoyance. "Ugh. A decent human being? By the way, you're burning that steak." He walks away once more, somehow even more grossed out. Cody looks down at the blackened slab of meat.

"Huh? Ah crap!" He frantically turns down the heat, sweat dragging down his face.

(Confessional: Cody)

"Man, am I glad the show is over so I can make consequence-free confessionals. Okay, so is it wrong for me to want to date Kim and Cindy at the same time? Yes. But I deserve it after what I did for Gwen and Trent. Doesn't that earn me some karma? Don't I get to do what I want for once? Huh? Exactly. Of course I do. So glad you won't air these. I might start talking to the wall in front of my toilet when I get home, that's how cathartic these feel."

(Confessional end)

Owen dances with Izzy, spinning her around as she imitates a fountain statue, one leg behind her back with her arms spread wide by her sides. He pumps his arms, rocking his hips to the music as he shoves cookie after cookie into his mouth. Izzy spins around her man on one foot, dancing around him like a majestic ballerina. "Oh, Owen, I cannot WAIT to step foot off of this crummy island and start spending some serious green on building the world's biggest treehouse ever. You know, I was thinking we could slash carbon emissions in half if we all drove like the Flintstones, you know, with our feet on the ground?! That's my idea for our big business, okay, what do you think?"

"Um… L-look, Izzy, I don't know how to tell you this, a-and don't think I don't like you, 'cause I really do. But.. I don't really wanna share the money with anybody." Owen says, his dance moves becoming awkward and slow.

Izzy twitches, her grin stagnant. "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah, ahaha, and uh.. I mean, I'll definitely spoil you when I can if we stay together! But uh.. I really don't want to become poor the second I become rich. You understand?" Owen cautiously continues.

Izzy takes a long, deep breath, not blinking. "Yeah, Big-O, I so get where you're coming from. Uh-huh!" She spins around toward the buffet table to suppress her anger with marshmallows, surprised to see Eva chewing the metaphorical head off of one. She watches her demolish the white gelatinous bulb before swallowing it hardily. "Wow, Eva! I didn't know you had such a sweet tooth."

Eva looks up, a light blush of embarrassment on her cheeks as she goes for another. "I like how tough and chewy they are. D-don't judge me." Izzy steals the platter from the fit girl and swallows the entire thing whole. "Hey! What the hell's the matter with you?!"

Izzy hands her back the platter, spins around as the crescendo of the song, opens her mouth wide in front of Owen and let's out a belch so loud, so poisonous, so undeniably crazy that Owen is forced to tank it, his hair blowing in the wind. Everyone around the area watches in amazement. When Izzy's finished, she wipes her mouth and waits cockily. Owen gets down on one knee, takes Izzy by the hand and gazes upon her with adoration in his eyes.

"I think I'm in love with you…"

Jackpot.

Noah walks up to Eva, chewing a taquito. "It's like if a homeless guy's barf and some kid's nose gold started dating." Noah quips.

"Gross. But true. Where'd you get that?" Eva points at his Mexican food.

"I'll show you, come on." Noah says, leading Eva away from the strange couple.

Heather, still wearing her rag of a wig, sits wearing her own clothes for the first time in weeks on a lounge chair, her airpods plugged into her ears and her phone lying on her flat tummy. She cringes when Ezekiel's harsh voice peaks through the aggressive techno in her ears.

"Yeah, so my dad this one time was trying to build a shack once, right, for grandma. This was years before she passed away, so she wasn't a ghost or nothin, you heard? So, dad's building this shack, like an in-law outside, like an outhouse but only there's like a bed and a kitchen and a bathroom, and maybe a corner for our tools and other junk we can't fit inside the mobile home. So, he had no wood though, okay, and me and mom were thinking he was gonna make her a shack out of hay or propane tanks or somethin' cause we live in an area where the woods are over forty minutes away, eh? So-"

Heather taps the volume button on her phone even when it's at its limit. Growling, she takes both pods out, stands up, pockets her phone and marches away, with Ezekiel still talking even as she leaves, seemingly to nobody in particular. "So yeah, I guess modern technology is good for something other than meds and TV." He fishes out his phone, a smart phone. "I wonder if it does more than just call for magic shacks. Maybe I can order roadkill pizza on it!"

(Confessional: Ezekiel)

"Check this out, sons and daughta's, er.. I got a smartphone like all the other homies on the block. I oughta thank Trent for the hookup. Yeah, most people are phonies, but he's the man, G."

(Confessional end)

Heather fishes her phone back out to change the song coming up. While distracted, she bumps into what she at first assumes must be a rather sweaty, skinny little pole. Instead, it's Harold, who was walking right in front of her. He swiftly turns to her and they make eye contact. The grin on his face makes her want to barf.

"Hey, Heather! Do you wanna hear about beaver facts that I jotted down on my trip to the creek by my house last summer?" Harold asks excitedly.

Behind Harold, LeShawna walks up the stairs toward the resort, laughing with Trent, Gwen, Bridgette, Geoff and DJ, with Courtney walking alongside them. Heather notices LeShawna's face fall when she spots them together and decides that she doesn't want to get her new outfits shredded the day after she ordered them. She shoves Harold roughly in his left shoulder, bouncing him back before walking away disrespectfully. "In your dreams, geek."

Harold shrugs sadly and heads for the bar, sitting next to Justin. "What'll you have?" Chef asks.

"A virgin bloody mary on the rocks, please and thank you." Harold orders, dropping his chin on the counter. Justin gives him a pity tap on the back.

"Chin up, buddy. You'll get her next time."

Meanwhile, LeShawna can't help but glare at both parties. Gwen places an arm on her shoulder. "Hey, you okay?"

"Just fine." She says between gritted teeth.

(Confessional: LeShawna)

"Oh I can hear it now: LeShawna, you broke up with Harold, why are you jealous about him talkin' to other girls? Well that's just the thing, I don't know when he started crushin' on Heather, if he's crushing on Heather. Did it start when me and Heather had our falling out? After he got eliminated? After we broke up? It makes me livid to think he was crushing on Heather while we were dating. I know he was head over heels for me, but let's be honest, the boys and girls back home would point and laugh if they saw me datin' a scrawny little dork like Harold, and they'd probably never let me live it down if he cheated on me. If society were any different, I'd keep that boy around, but... I just can't. Man, I can't wait to get off this stupid island."

(Confessional end)

Duncan dances to himself garishly as a new, bombastic song comes on, akin to something you'd hear at a rave. His hips sway, his arms stretch behind his back and rock his head back and forth, and his knees bend to the sound of pure energy. Courtney shyly approaches, hands behind her back like she's about to show her parents a C on her report card. He smirks as she approaches, moving forward with his moves, swaying his ass upward as he leers into her eyes, then grabs her hips and gyrates around her, taking his hands off of her when she turns around so he can dance more vibrantly, his teeth pinching his bottom lip.

Courtney can't help but watch. Not because she finds it attractive or grotesque. Or maybe a mix of both? She shakes her head. "Duncan.."

"What? Too intimidating or too hot for you to respond normally?" He teases, enjoying this way more than her. She immediately hugs herself for protection, closing herself off entirely.

"We need to talk. I can't joke around right now." Courtney says.

Immediately, Duncan is scared. "Talk? About what?"

Courtney looks down guiltily. "About.. Us."

"Oh. What?"

"I.. I've been feeling really stressed out lately, Duncan."

"Because of me?"

"No. Well.. I don't know."

"What did I do?" Duncan asks worriedly.

"Nothing! Well, something. But nothing you can't help." Courtney stresses, avoiding eye contact.

"Spit it out, Court." He demands.

"...You know how my parents want me to break up with you before the competition is over?"

"So what, fuck them." Duncan exhales.

"Duncan! You're not helping." Courtney snaps.

"What? It's true, that's how I feel."

"I don't care! Whether they're rude or not, please try to show them a little bit of respect." Their arguing is drowned out to the other campers, the music far too loud.

Duncan tries a calmer route, approaching carefully with the back of his hand draping down her freckled cheek. "Aw, come on, mellow your yellow, babe. Hey, what happened to that smokin' hot babe who helped me smuggle junk food back to camp?"

Courtney's cheeks heat up. She doesn't back down. "Nothing. But there's more."

Duncan steps back, his stomach fluttering in all the worst ways as he frowns. "Is this about last night?"

Silence. Courtney takes a deep breath in, bracing herself. "That made me realize a few things, yes."

Duncan flinches, cradling his skull. "Ah, fuck. Fucking stupid idiot pervert.."

Courtney reaches out to comfort him but instinctively pulls back. "No, no, it's… it's not you. It's me. I'm not in the mood, ever really. I feel sick, and frustrated and sad because I lost a hundred thousand dollars all because someone wanted revenge on you and now Chris has more lawyers than me and I might have to settle and-"

Duncan twitches, looking up at her. "Hold on one minute: you resent me for getting you eliminated?"

"What? Oh my god, enough with the psychoanalyzation, Duncan. This is serious!" Courtney throws her arms around, eyebrows furrowed. Bridgette notices their body language.

"Oh boy.."

"No, no, I'm not psychoanalzing anything." Duncan says.

"Analyzing. Not analing." Courtney barks back.

"Whatever. You said what you said." Duncan folds his arms and focuses on a weirdly shaped cloud. Anything but her.

"I said that I'm pissed off about the lawsuit, not that I'm pissed at you." Courtney communicates.

"Okay, well I really don't wanna have this conversation right now." Duncan swallows.

"Yeah? Well we need to. Bridgette told me we should."

"Oh, great, gang up on Duncan, classic."

"You know, sleeping in the same bed as you took a LOT of strength for me to do!"

"So what, I'm some fucking creep 'cause I wanna fuck you? I said I was sorry, and I still mean it and I'll still say it because I am! Let's just drop it, Courtney."

"I can't drop it. It's not about the intercourse, Duncan, listen to me!" She claps her hands together impatiently.

"Then what is it about? Your cunty parents who won't let you breathe to save your own life because it's not God's will or whatever the fuck?" Duncan questions, a low blow. She grits her teeth.

"Stop it. You're being immature." Courtney stabs, knowing it hurts him. A cheap shot, but she needs to know he's hurt as bad as she is.

"A first, am I right?" Duncan huffs, looking back at her. Courtney takes a step back, collecting herself to finally deliver the news.

"I think we should take a-"

Chugachugachugachugachugachuga.

The contestants look up to see a red chopper floating over them. The dust it kicks up forces them all to hide their faces behind their arms, while the chopper lands on the beach.

"Oh, that cannot be good." DJ remarks.

They all wait in a nauseating silence until the host with the most wearing his summer best finally makes a physical appearance. With a shit eating grin, he greets the kids. "Good afternoon, campers!"

"Ah-ah-ah, that's ex campers to you." LeShawna corrects.

"Yeah, we're done playing your crazy game. The shows over, remember?" Gwen adds, nodding along with LeShawna.

"Woah, campers.. Where's the fire? I come in peace!" Chris teases, his hands up in defense but his grin unwavering.

"Might have something to do with the weeks of exhaustive, mentally and physically deteriorating challenges, food and cruel environments." DJ replies.

"Just… get it over with." Eva huffs.

"Thank you, Eva, one of the most famous ladies of the summer." Chris says.

"What? Famous? Eva?" Are some of the words that emerge from the crowd of confused contestants. Eva hides behind Noah subtly.

Chris clears his throat. "Total Drama Island has made all of you some of the hottest celebs in the biz right now. Even Robert Pattinson is currently drowning in comparison to, let's say.. Ezekiel."

"I dunno who that is, eh." Ezekiel interjects.

"YOU don't know Robert Pattinson?!" Beth sprays Ezekiel, her braces jetting spit out of her mouth.

"Why are you so surprised? Dude lives in a trailer, cut him some slack." Trent says in defense of Zeke, who smiles.

"Anyway.." Chris continues. "Total Drama Island, combining ratings, advertisers, merch, DVD and soundtrack sales, is projected to make over one billion dollars worldwide. We are HUGE in Croatia, Jamaica and Japan, believe it or not."

"I can believe it. Did you know that the world's greatest game shows are all hosted in Japan?" Harold quizzes.

"Ooh, I did! My favorite is Mr. Itoi's Crazy Happy Baseball Camp." Tyler shouts back, high fiving Harold.

"Any host with a brain knows, Harold. But I'm not here to talk to you. Owen, come here, my man." Chris motions for Owen to join him.

"Me? Okay." Owen looks around at his fellow castmates, feeling a tad on the spot as he walks toward Chris. Chef carries a large hundred thousand dollar check in his hands, walking behind Chris.

"With the money Total Drama is going to be making, and is already making, we've decided to sweeten your deal. What would you rather have: a guaranteed 100K, or… One.

Million.

Dollars?"

Gasps erupt from behind Owen. Chef drops the check and reveals a second larger one with the massive number written on the line.

"...Go on." Owen mumbles dreamily, dollar signs in his eyes.

"One last challenge. Everyone has the chance of winning not 100K, but one million dollars. You'll be transported to Wawanakwa, where the race for the case will start at the Dock of Shame. A suitcase containing the money will be placed somewhere on the island. You can work together or alone, doesn't matter to me. What does matter is that once you get the suitcase, make your way back to the Dock of Shame where I will be waiting. There, you will become the new winner of Total Drama Island and be crowned a millionaire. Owen, are you willing to go through with this deal?"

While Owen hesitates to think of his options, Trent cuts in. "We're a lot happier not playing your game, McLean."

"Y-yeah.. I mean, who needs a million dollars when you have peace and tranquility?" Gwen adds, her boyfriend nodding in approval.

"..Psht, I ain't gonna entertain your idea of entertainment no more." LeShawna states, not as confident.

"Yeah, a lotta good that did us." Duncan speaks up.

"And besides, Owen's way above this show now that he's won it. Right Owen?" Noah questions.

Owen leans down, picking up the check for 100K before ripping it in half, his castmates going slack jawed as he shakes the devil's hand. "You've got a deal! Game on!"

"Beautiful! Chef, take him to the Boat of Lo- sorry. Boat of Winners for the race." Chris instructs. Chef throws the fake check to the side, showing Owen the way as he celebrates to himself behind the cook. "So… aren't the rest of you gonna join him in the race? Or are you too 'above it all' like Noah here says? Because if I were you, I certainly wouldn't just let Owen win the easiest million dollars in TV history… but eh, that's just me." Chris swiftly turns around, the antsy competitors getting antsier with each step forward. Everyone tries to play it cool, whistling to themselves, looking around, humming… But it all comes undone with a stampede of running teens heading for the dock, shoving, punching and swatting past each other. Chris winks at the camera.

The Boat of Losers (or winners?) stops at the Dock of Shame. We're back at Camp Wawanakwa. The entire cast, now wearing their street clothes, jump out of the back of the boat and begin to trample over each other as they race down the dock, not getting far before ending up in a massive pile-up of twenty two clawing, kicking, grunting teens. As everyone struggles to escape, Courtney wiggles her way out, kicking Zeke in the face. "Ow!" She does a tactical roll out before finding Duncan struggling between LeShawna and Geoff. He looks surprised that she rescued him, but even more surprised when she starts screaming.

"AHHH! Let's go get that million dollars! Yes!" She wraps her adrenaline fueled pumps around Duncan's neck, the pain the spikes on his choker cause fueling her energetic state, crashing her lips against his in the most fiery kiss they've ever shared. Duncan is shocked the whole way through. "Mmmmmm….WAH!"

Duncan pulls back, holding her by the hips. "Woah. And here I thought you were losing your edge." He grins.

"Shut up and follow me. We've got a suitcase to find!" Courtney replies, grabbing his hand.

"Sir, yes sir!" He follows her loyally, a headstart compared to the other campers.

Noah climbs out from underneath Owen, dusting himself off with a scowl on his face. Eva claws her way out next to him, the two standing together.

"That was primal." Noah states.

"Get used to it, sugar. A million dollars are on the line." Eva bites.

From the clump, Izzy does a rolling front flip out, landing behind both of them. Before they can even turn around to comprehend what just happened, Izzy snags Noah's collar and Eva's wrist, pulling them away against their will. "What are you doing?!" Eva snarls, trying to fight the red-head. Izzy tosses both of them, with Noah falling on his ass and Eva stumbling back onto her feet. Izzy points at Noah.

"You'd make a perfect human shield,"

Noah is stunned. "Okay, what?"

She points at Eva. "And YOU would make the perfect bodyguard. Come on, Eva, you're the strongest person on the island!"

Eva lets a small, egotistical grin settle on her strong face. "That is true…"

"So come on! Let's team up! Strength in numbers and all that jazz! Whaddya say?!" Izzy clasps her hands together, her tongue lolled out of her mouth like a dog when it pants. Eva considers it.

"Fine, I'll join you. On the condition that we split the money three ways."

"Three ways? Oh, right. I guess you assume I'll join you too." Noah stands himself up, tilting his neck to crack it. As he does so, he notices Owen get out of the crowd with DJ and Cody. "Meh. Fine. Three-way split."

"Kinky! Let's move!" Izzy exclaims, running forward. Eva runs behind her and Noah sighs before weakly jogging behind them.

DJ approaches Owen and Cody with a welcoming smile. "Owen, bro! Room for another dude in your team?"

Owen gasps. "DJ! Yes! We are so on top of this!" They high five, with Cody standing in the middle.

"Woohoo! Team Geek Squad is back in action!" Cody cheers, hands in the air.

"Geek squad?" DJ questions.

"Me, Cody and Noah. But since Noah's gone, you can be our third! I think he got pulled away by Eva and Izzy." Owen explains.

"Oh for sure! Yeah, we should get going!" DJ replies, nodding. Before the guys can jet away, though, Tyler sheepishly comes up to the three guys.

"Hey, dudes, uh, could I join up with you? Lindsay and I have been together for like, the entire time she's been back and I miss hanging out with my bros." He rubs his arm. Owen, Cody and DJ look between each before smiling.

"Of course! The more the merrier!" Owen answers. Tyler's face lights up as he pumps his fist.

"Alright! Let's go bring back the donuts!"

"Team Geek Squad 2.0 is a go!" Cody says.

"Go team Geek Squad!" The group, aside from Tyler, shout in unison. They group high-five before running off into the woods.

"Oh, man.. Do we have to call it that?" Tyler questions. He runs with them after receiving no response.

Gwen, Trent and LeShawna naturally come together. Gwen looks between both of them as they stand on each of her sides. "So… us three?" She asks.

"Sounds like a plan." Trent agrees.

"The dream team is back in action! Let's tear this island up." LeShawna exclaims. As she turns, Harold is standing right at her, only inches away.

"Room for one more, LeShawna?" The smell of casanova chewing mints hits her face. She lightly pushes him away by his chest with one hand.

"Uh… sorry, but no. We gotta go." She replies, walking away. Gwen goes along with her.

"Good luck, Harold." Trent says, waving him goodbye as he follows LeShawna and Gwen into the woods. Harold lowers his head sadly. The group walk right into Heather, who immediately forces a smile.

"Hey guys! I realize that we've had our.. Minor differences. But what do you say we team up? We're the four strongest players. Together we'd be unstoppable." Heather proposes, her fake friendliness back in full force.

LeShawna snickers. "You frontin' me? I'd rather stick a tire iron up my butt then team up with you."

"Well at least I didn't sleep with that!" Heather motions her arm towards Harold, who's busy playing on his calculator.

LeShawna gasps, winding up a slap. "OOh, you did NOT just go there with your two timin-"

"Come on! We are losing precious time here, we have to go!" Gwen grabs one shoulder while Trent grabs the other, the couple leading LeShawna away from the argument.

"Ooh, she is going to get it!" LeShawna barks, seething. Heather glares at her, watching her opportunity slip past her fingers. She watches as some of the other contestants team up, weighing her options.

Justin allows a butterfly to land on his finger, nuzzling it to his cheek as Sadie and Katie daydream over him. He notices them and smiles. "Would you ladies like to help me look for that million dollar prize?"

"Worth a million…"

"Huh?"

"S-she said yes! Yes, Justin."

"Okay, let's go." He leads them, walking past Heather with a snobbish "Don't even think about it." Sadie and Katie pretend she's not there. Heather rolls her eyes, landing them on Geoff and Bridgette.

"You wanna team up, baby?" Geoff asks his girlfriend.

"Of course! Love conquers all, after all." Bridgette states, rubbing his cheek. He leans into her touch.

"Totally."

"Can I join?" Ezekiel asks, hope in his eyes. Geoff gets off of Bridgette and casually responds.

"Sure thi-"

Bridgette slaps a hand over his mouth. "No. No thanks, sorry."

"Oh… Okay. Sorry, eh." Ezekiel awkwardly scratches the back of his neck, walking away.

"What did you do that for, babe?" Geoff asks.

"You can't tell? Zeke has a massive crush on me." Bridgette explains.

"He does? Oh my god… seriously? Zeke?" The party dude says, flabbergasted.

"Yes. He's gross, though, like the nose picking and the accent, and the lack of social skills.. I can't help but feel bad for him, but.. Come on!"

"Ah, yeah, I get it. It's just a little sad seeing him walk off like that." Geoff admits guiltily.

"Hey, don't worry. Don't you wanna split the money and do Christmas in Australia? We could be surfing while Santa makes his rounds in Toronto!"

Geoff taps his chin. "The land down under… Aw man, a summer Christmas sounds elite! Chyeah, you definitely made the right move, babe. We'll split the money two ways. No thirds, whatsoever." Geoff replies, taking her hand.

"Let's move then!" Bridgette orders, running with Geoff by her side, hand-in-hand.

"Crap!" Heather curses, growling as she taps her temple. She turns around, spotting a pair of idiots who once worked for her standing up from their dead positions on the ground. Beth helps Lindsay up. "Maybe.." But as Heather approaches them, Beth turns to Lindsay.

"Wanna be partners?" Beth asks.

"Oh my gosh, yes!" Lindsay exclaims.

"Ladies, it's your lucky day. I am going to help you find this million dollars."

"No thanks, Heather. We have enough people." Beth bitterly states, holding Lindsay's arm.

"Lindsay?" Heather asks, desperate.

"Sorry, Hannah. Beth's right." Lindsay waves at her, dragged away by Beth.

"Ugh! Whatever." Heather snaps.

With a clench of her fists, she struts alone, passing by Harold. He gets all giddy, raising a finger to speak.

"No." Heather shuts him down immediately. He shakes his fist at her pathetically.

(Confessional: Heather)

"Okay, I know it looks like I'm desperate, but… Okay I'm desperate. But not THAT desperate! God, I haven't wanted to get away from a group of people since I was forced into mathletes for extra credit."

(Confessional end)

Ezekiel sits on a rock, his head in his hands as he holds back tears, sniffling to himself. Beth stops herself in her tracks. "Look, Lindsay.." She says sadly, pointing at Zeke. Lindsay frowns.

"Awww, Zion is sad. What do you think happened?" Lindsay asks.

"I heard he has a major crush on Bridgette. Think he just got rejected?" Beth suggests.

"Bridgette's dating Geoff, right? So he must know that he has no chance with her. Especially because he's a weird, kinda gross, kinda annoying guy." Lindsay replies.

"Hey…" Beth smiles. "You're right!"

(Confessional: Beth)

"We're both from rural towns, we're both brunettes, we both have a farmer's tan, everybody thinks we're weird, and we both adore our parents! What if Ezekiel's my Prince Charming? He's changed since episode one, right? He sees women as equals now. Definitely."

(Confessional end)

Beth approaches Zeke, with Lindsay in tow. He looks up when she calls his name. "Ezekiel. Are you okay?"

He quickly dries his face with his crusty sleeve. "Oh, uh, h-hi Beth. I'm fine."

"Is this about Bridgette?" Beth asks, sitting next to him.

"H-how did you know about that?" He looks at her worriedly.

"I know everything about everyone here! People tend to open up around me. Besides, I'm just really nice." Beth smiles, revealing her braces. Zeke smiles back.

"Oh really? Uh, aha.. Um, yeah, it is. She's with Geoff, and I'll never get with her, eh. No matter how many hot verses I spit." He kicks the dirt sadly.

"Ladies typically don't like spit, actually." Lindsay cuts in.

Beth looks down, then back around at Zeke. "Well.. some do. Wanna team up with us?" She stands up, hands on her hips.

"You mean it?!" He gets up, cheery.

"Only if you show us girls some respect." Beth says.

"Yeah! Yeah for sure, eh! I'm way past all that! I learned!" He nods eagerly, shaking Beth's hand, then Lindsay's, shaking Beth's glasses and Lindsay's assets in the process.

"Okay! Come on, let's go find the million dollars!" Beth cheers.

"Woohoo!" Lindsay cheers back.

"You're picking homeschool over me?!" Heather's rough, angry voice pops up behind them. They turn to her. Lindsay rolls her eyes.

"Uh, yeeeaah, he's changed."

"You haven't. Good luck, baldie." Beth blows a raspberry at Heather, walking away with her group, all of them laughing at her. She grits her teeth and punches a tree next to her, immediately regretting the decision with a yelp. She holds her fist, beginning to storm off. Nobody is left.

Nobody at all.

Not one little soul.

She can rough it alone, right? She always has.

…

"So… wanna partner up now?" Harold asks with an oblivious smile. Heather sighs, long and drawn out.

"Fine. On the condition that you never speak."

"No prob-"

"Ah-ah! Shut it! Let's go." Heather squeezes his lips, then releases and marches on. Harold follows her eagerly.

(Confessional: Harold)

"I told you, the ladies can't resist the charms! While LeShawna gets over whatever ick is preventing her from being with me, I might as well work my charms on another sexy lady on the island. Even while bald, the glare in her eyes is kind of attractive… D-don't tell LeShawa.. Or Heather."

(Confessional end)

A montage of all of the teams running around the island cluelessly and aimlessly plays over the catchy intro theme music. Two hours pass in this timelapse.

After a quick commercial break, we cut to the intercoms. "Okay, this is pathetic campers! It's been two hours now and no one has even come close to finding the suitcase. So here's your first clue: it's just hangin' around." Chris booms.

Justin leads Sadie and Katie through the woods, strutting with his beautiful eyes scanning the not-so-beautiful woods. Sadie and Katie, however, are looking elsewhere. "Oh my gosh, Katie, look at that butt!" Sadie gushes.

"I know, right? It's.. it's…" Katie stutters.

"Perfect~" The two say in unison, leaning into each other. They sigh, eyes glued to Justin's peachy buns. A few squirrels watch Justin go by, copying the girls, with one squirrel fainting into the other's arms. A bird flies by, distracted by his good looks and crashes into a tree. Justin knows what he's doing, stalking so confidently through the dirt path. His eyes gaze into the trees, cluing into Chris' words.

"Hey, Justin, show me some love!" An aging paparazzo orders from the trees, a camera in his hands. Justin immediately strikes a pose, then another, and one more, all while the camera flashes him. He glances at Sadie and Katie.

"Either of you ladies see the case yet?"

"No…" They trail off, gawking at him.

Eva, Noah, and Izzy behind them search the trunks of the trees over their heads. "How many square hexagons is this island again? I feel like taking a nap already."

"What, you're gonna give up a million dollars because you can't walk for more than an hour? Pathetic." Eva berates.

"Says the girl who blew a gasket when she stepped on a pebble. What happened to anger management therapy?" Noah questions. Eva bashfully pokes her fingers together.

"I… It hurt a lot, okay? I'm not perfect either. I guess." She looks away.

"Thank you." Noah states.

Izzy pops both of her hands on each of their shoulders. "You guys! I think I know where the suitcase must be!"

"Oh, joy." Noah twirls his finger over his temple.

"It's gotta be somewhere in the trees! You know, like, hanging around in a tree like a monkey?" Izzy runs up to a tree, sizing it up with wild eyes. Eva and Noah look between each other.

"Yeah, we kinda figured that out."

Izzy nods at Eva. "Yeah-hah! So come on, what are we waiting for!? Let's make like a monkey and swiiiing!" She makes a startling tall jump onto a branch, grabs a swinging vine and effortlessly swings away, launching herself from tree to tree, leaving her teammates in the dust. Noah and Eva watch, unsure of how to continue.

"I guess that's one quarter shredded in half. Let's say we split it in half?" Eva spits on her hand, offering it to shake. Noah shivers.

"You've got yourself a deal. Use your other hand." Eva rolls her eyes and walks past him.

"Sissy."

"Meathead." He walks with her.

"Hanging around? Now that's an obvious clue if I've ever heard one. It's gotta be in the trees." Courtney says, one hand on her hip as she stares at the variety of bushy trees above them. Duncan shakes his head.

"No, no, no, Chris is way more deceptive than that. Think about it, hanging could mean hanging from anywhere. He always did like pulling our legs about word choice. What if the case is hanging from a noose in the mess hall, where Gwen faced off against the psycho killer?"

Courtney faces him, narrowing her head at his. "That's ridiculous. Look, if you want this relationship to thrive, we're going to have to be on the same page more. Got it?"

Duncan opens his mouth to rebuttal, but swallows instead and just follows behind her plump, uptight butt. "Whatever you say, your lordship."

The case hangs from a trunk, strung up by rope that has its shadow dangling. Lindsay and Beth are chatting, with Lindsay holding her phone up so Beth can see. "That's the kind of dress I want for prom! Me and Tyler don't go to the same school, but hopefully we can go to each other's proms when senior year is over!"

"Ooooh, I'd love to see your outfits! You should make him match yours." Beth enthuses.

"Totes! So cute." Lindsay agrees.

Ezekiel spots the case, pointing at it. "Hey, isn't that the-"

Beth turns around. "Say, Ezekiel, is there prom at your homeschool?"

He stops and thinks. "Er… No. Ma says she'll throw me a hootenanny if I get an A in my final classes though."

She takes a step closer. "Well.. at my school, we do prom, and I was wondering if maybe you'd wanna go with me." She asks, her heel digging into the dirt. Zeke blushes.

"Oh! Uh…"

"Well? What do you say?" Beth questions, her eyes half closed.

"Say yes! That would be so much fun for you guys!" Lindsay excitedly says, jumping up and down.

"Yes, that would be so much fun for you guys?" Ezekiel repeats, shrinking in his hat. Beth looks confused.

"Huh? What does that mean? Are you saying I'm not good enough for you?"

Zeke goes slack jawed. "What? No, I was just-"

"If you want anyone to like you like that, Zeke, you have to work on your manners. I'm giving you a warning, for now." Beth states.

"But-!"

"No buts, you need to learn to respect the gals around you. We made you, you know." Beth says.

"Yeah! We have to call the storks and everything, so respect us." Lindsay states sternly. "Did I do it right?" She asks, dropping the mean attitude.

Beth nods. "Totally. Now follow us." She struts, leading. Lindsay follows with a hum.

"Yes ladies…" Zeke hangs his head, hands in his pockets. All three of them pass the case right by.

(Confessional: Ezekiel)

"Man, being a gentleman is hard. Pa used to say that gentlemen should really just do whatever they think is best for the girls, but Pa's wrong about modern women. So… should I just do whatever they say? This is hard…"

(Confessional: Beth)

"Ezekiel is so into me. He has to be, I've never seen a guy get that red talking to me before. Well, aside from that guy I asked to the eighth grade dance, but that was on account of all of his acne. At least he said yes."

(Confessional end)

A few seconds after they leave, Geoff and Bridgette are walking in the same area when Geoff spots the case. "Ah! Babe, look! It's the case!"

"Oh! Go on, honey, grab it!" Bridgette yells. Geoff runs up to the shadow of the case and thinks.

"I know! Get on my shoulders!"

"Okay!" Bridgette runs up behind him, jumps into his arms with a giggle and is elevated up to his shoulders, where she stands. He grunts as her full weight is pressed onto him, but is able to stay standing long enough for her toned arms to grab the case and yank it off its rope, nearly tripping. She falls, but Geoff catches her bridal style. "My hero.." They lock lips, briefly.

"Let's head to the dock for an Australian Christmas!" Geoff says.

"AAAWWWAHWAHAHA!" Izzy howls, swinging toward them at mach speed. Geoff and Bridgette scream, caught completely off guard.

Punt!

The case goes flying out of Bridgette's hands, while Izzy continues swinging past them. "Thanks for the case, suckaaaassss!" Izzy taunts, making gorilla mating calls all the way to victory. Geoff and Bridgette stare, dazed.

"Get that case!" Bridgette calls, jumping out of her boyfriend's hands before rushing after Izzy. Geoff sprints with her.

The case lands by the beach, but jumps a few more times before it makes a big splash into the water, right in front of Duncan and Courtney. The CIT gasps. "Duncan! The case! Grab it!"

Duncan ignores the fact that he's the one who has to nab it out of the water as adrenaline fills his veins. He throws his shirt off and starts running in. But, just before he can grab it, an alligator emerges from the sea and bites it, trying to bite it down and swallow it. "Oh you can't be serious."

"Duncan, do something!" She yells from the sidelines, nervous. "O-or at least get away from it!"

"No way. That's a million big ones. Come at me!" Duncan leaps onto the alligators back as it tries to swim away, arms wrapped around its chin and chest.

"Are you crazy?!" Courtney screams.

"A little support would be nice!" Duncan yells back.

"Uh- g-go, honey, go!" Courtney cheers, anxiety clear in her voice. The gator takes a dive, taking Duncan underwater.

Now Justin is behind Sadie and Katie, the two girls mindlessly caught in thought as he makes an effort to scan the trees for the case. A cave is nearby, the same one from the hide and seek challenge. "OH! And then there was that time you went into the boys room by mistake and totally froze up!" Katie's voice squeaks. Justin winces at her volume.

"Oh my gosh, I'll never forget that!" Sadie replies, just as loud. Justin tightens his fists, furrowing his brows while looking away so they don't see.

(Confessional: Justin)

"I am going to lose it! If I have to listen to these two for another second, I'm gonna throw myself off a cliff."

(Confessional end)

"And I had to come in and drag you out! It was the first time I had ever seen a urinal!" Katie says.

"OKAY YOU KNOW WHAT?!" His volume is for once louder than both of theirs. They smile at him innocuously, waiting for his next words. He clears his throat. "I really have to use the bathroom. Why don't you two ladies go wait for me in that cave so I can have some privacy?" He grins, a shine forming in his teeth.

"Okay!~" Sadie and Katie say in unison, immediately turning to the cave and walking toward the entrance.

"Isn't he the sweetest?" Katie asks.

"Oh, I know. The other guys would have totally gone number two right in front of us!"

"You don't think Justin goes number two, do you?"

"Of course not!" With Sadie's words forming into echoes inside of the cave, Justin breathes a sigh of relief and heads in the opposite direction. That's when he spots team Gwen, LeShawna and Trent.

"Showtime." He whispers to himself, his beautiful smile on full display. He struts up to the girls and Trent and they immediately stop whatever they're talking about.

"Heyyy.." The girls greet.

"Aw crap." Trent rolls his eyes. "He's just some model, I thought you hated Twilight, Gwen. Look at him, he's like Jacob."

"Aha, Twilight's a classic. I played Sharkboy's torso in Sharkboy and Lava Girl for my boy Taylor, back when I was a kid." Justin winks.

"Oh really..? I love Taylor Lautner, Justin…" Gwen mumbles. Trent raises a brow in confusion.

"Interesting. Would you ladies happen to know where the case might be?" Justin asks.

"No way! We're not giving you anything, pretty boy. So take your handsome ass outta here before you break a nail." Trent threatens, punching his palm intimidatingly.

Justin chuckles. "LeShawna, restrain him for me."

"Sure thing, candy apple.." LeShawna throws her arms under Trent's, pinning him in a full nelson.

"Ah! LeShawna, the hell are you doing?" Trent struggles. She does not respond.

"Now… Ladies?" Justin asks, his grin evil yet… so hot.

"We searched all up the beach already." LeShawna answers.

"And the western side of the island." Gwen adds.

"So don't go makin' those fine legs of yours sore struttin' over there." LeShawna's almond eyes scan his legs.

"Thank you. Release." Justin commands. LeShawna releases Trent as he walks away, waving at the girls. Trent waves his hand in front of them, bringing them back to their senses.

"Did you seriously just give up all of our information to Justin?" The guitarist questions.

Gwen and LeShawna slowly blink. "...How does he do that?"

"Even to taken women. You hate to… mm, see it." LeShawna fawns, despite her words.

"We still have a lot of ground to cover. Let's go." Trent bitterly states, walking away.

Gwen watches him go, concerned. "Crap.. Think Trent's mad at me?"

LeShawna shakes her head back to reality. "Uh, maybe? Probably. Just apologize to him when you get the chance." She puts her hand on Gwen's back as she walks past her. But instead of waiting, Gwen walks toward Trent, rubbing her skinny arm.

"Trent.. I don't want to be with Justin." Gwen says.

"I know." Trent replies through clenched teeth.

"He just.. Has these eyes that girls can't resist." Gwen clarifies.

"I get it, Gwen. I'm not mad at you. Just let me relax." He growls, clenching his fists. Gwen looks away with a frown. He spares a glance at her. "But.. look, we're okay. I'm just the jealous type, you know?"

She smiles at him, offering her hand. Hesitantly he takes it. "I understand. I'm sorry."

"Don't sweat it. We're still learning. Let's get that case." Trent replies, squeezing her hand.

Underwater, Duncan screams, bubbles soaring out of his mouth and floating to the surface. Courtney watches with baited breath as her boyfriend wrestles an alligator for her. After punching the gator in the stomach a few times and putting it in a chokehold, it eventually rises to the surface and upchucks the case onto the beach. Courtney takes the case, holding it by the handle as saliva drips from it. There's a sizable dent in it now, but it doesn't matter. The gator throws Duncan toward the beach too, growling as it swims away with a whimper.

Courtney dips the case in the lake to clean it before hugging Duncan. "You're okay! A-and you got the case? You're my hero!"

"Ah, I've had tougher girlfriends than him. And uglier." Duncan, covered in bruises, stands up and brushes himself off, walking the pain off.. But not for long. As Courtney holds the case and heads for the Dock, Duncan suddenly falls to the ground, his ankle deciding to take a hard left turn that takes him down to the sand. "Ah! C-crap!" He hisses.

"Duncan..? Are you okay?" She looks down at him.

He holds his leg, groaning in pain. "Ah, I think I twisted my ankle.. You're gonna have to carry me."

"Oh…" Courtney looks down at his desperate eyes and his weak hand begging for salvation as it reaches out for her. Then she looks down at the case. He'd slow her down. He's her partner, she can't abandon him. But the money… So much money. She bites her bottom lip.

"Uh, Courtney? Come on, this really hurts." His voice whines, lighter than normal, his eyes more desperate and vulnerable than she had ever seen. Weakness. When she hears rustling in the bushes, she knows her answer.

"You… You know you mean the world to me." He shakes his arm, waiting to see her hand reach out for his. It does, but misses and pats his head instead, fluffing up his mohawk. "But… I can't let you slow me down. You understand, right?"

"What? Slow you d- a-are you serious right now, I just wrestled an alligator for that case!" Duncan points at it, angry. Courtney takes off, running away as fast as she can.

"I'll come back for you!" She yells back at him, not stopping to even look back at him. Duncan growls to himself, seething with rage. He punches the sand, repeatedly, as Eva and Noah show up.

"She's getting away!" Eva shouts, running after Courtney. Noah spots Duncan and can't help but laugh, approaching him condescendingly.

"So, your girlfriend turned on ya, huh? Shame." Noah taunts.

"Whatever." Duncan snarls, trying to ignore him.

"Must make you feel quite emasculated, huh? Like less of a man."

That's it. "Enough of a man to take your head off, geek!" Duncan tackles Noah, tugging at his shorts. Noah screams, desperately taking his pants off to get away from the delinquents grip, running as his voice screeches like a girl. Duncan slowly gets himself back up to his feet, hobbling on one leg. He tosses Noah's pants into the woods. "Who's the man now?!"

Courtney nearly trips over a branch while running away from Eva, the fitness freak easily catching up. Wind slaps against their faces, their arms and legs moving in tandem in the desperate chase. Courtney isn't fast enough, though.

"GIVE IT BACK!" Eva screams, startling Courtney. Eva leaps forward and tackles Courtney, hugging her waist so she can't move. The case falls out of her hands and right onto an inconveniently placed trampoline just meters away under a tree. It bounces high up, just in time for a certain red head to swing onto the highest branch on the tree and collect the case by it's handle. Eva and Courtney are shocked.

"Woo, it's all sticky with sweat. Nice job, Eva!"

"Izzy! Give it back."

"What, you don't trust me? Woah!" She dodges a rock thrown by Eva. "Haha, I guess not! In that case, oooowooaaaahhowowow!" She calls like Tarzan, leaping off of the branch onto a new vine. Eva stomps her feet while Courtney plucks an apple from a nearby tree and makes a decisive throw that hits Izzy right in the base of the spine, causing her to lose the case out of her hands. "Crap!"

"Yes!" Courtney cheers. Eva runs off for it, while Courtney does the same, the case no longer visible but definitely somewhere near enough to run toward.

"Here's clue number two: the case is where monkeys love to climb." Chris' voice booms over the loudspeaker.

The case is now on another tree's trunk, adjacent to a bunch of bananas hanging underneath it. The camera zooms out to reveal team Geek Squad 2.0 walking under it. Tyler gasps, pointing at the banana tree. "You guys! Look, it's the case!"

The guys cheer, and Tyler excitedly begins climbing up the tree. "You the man, you the man!" Owen, DJ and Cody shout supportively. It doesn't take long for Tyler to fall down from the tree. The cheering stops.

"I-I got this! Just a little fall!" Tyler slaps his cheeks before running toward the tree again, the cheering resuming. As he climbs, Harold whistles in the distance, walking casually through the woods. Heather walks behind him, noticing the sound of cheering and climbing. That's when she spots Geek Squad and the case. She puts a finger over Harold's lips.

"Shh!" He stops before being dragged down into a nearby bush by his wrist.

"The case! We lost!" Harold states in frustration, kicking the bush as Tyler falls again.

"Third time's the charm..!" Tyler jumps up, bruised now, and climbs the tree a third time.

"Yeah! Yeah, you're.. You're still the man!" Owen yells, while the others just look kind of awkward. Tyler falls again.

"Wait for it." Heather whispers to her scrawny partner.

"Almost… had it." Tyler groans, jumping onto the tree, climbing it with a bloody nose, and finally retrieving the case, falling directly into DJ's arms this time. He holds the case up triumphantly, the guys cheering. Tyler slowly jumps down to his feet, high fiving the guys.

"Alright! Now let's go get to the dock." Cody says.

Heather smirks at Harold. "Are you up for a little burglary action?"

Harold smiles. "Definitely. This one time, at computer camp-"

"Zip!" She closes his lips as fast as she can before crawling over him, out of the bush.

"Woohoo! Million dollar cheese cellar, here I come!" Owen tries to nab the case from Tyler's hands, but the proud jock keeps his grip locked tight on the handle.

"Woah, woah, woah, who says you should be holding the case?" Tyler questions.

"Uh, well, why should YOU be the one to keep it instead?" Owen asks, pointing disapprovingly. Tyler freezes, looking around nervously.

"Yeah.. that's right. What if you run off with the money and leave us all behind?" DJ suggests.

"WHAT?! I would NEVER! I got team spirit, and major love for those who helped me become the GOAT!" Tyler pounds his chest, fierce looking.

"Yeah, and you have a girlfriend with a pension for spending as much as she can on designer crap." Cody accuses. Tyler raises a fist to his face.

"Don't talk about Lindsay that way, dirtbag!"

DJ gets between them. "Enough! Clearly, we can't decide on who should hold the case, and I'm sure none of us wants to lose out on a million big ones. So, we gotta figure this out. Who should hold the case?"

After a few seconds of pondering, Cody has an answer. "Oh, I know!" He grabs a long piece of rope from his pocket and begins wrapping it around all of them, including himself, eventually tying the knot at his stomach. It's like an amalgamation roped together with Owen at the kaboose and Cody at the front. "There, now none of us can run off with the case."

"Yeeehaha!" Tyler cheers.

"Maybe he is going number two." Katie suggests, still hanging out in the empty cave.

Sadie gasps. "No! I hate going number two in public."

"Me too!" Katie says, smiling at her friend. "Don't you LOVE how much we have in common?!"

"Oh my gosh, so love it!" Sadie claps her hands together and rubs them whilst grinning ear to ear.

"You know what else I hate doing in public? Diarrhea. Remember that time you had Mono and you were stuck in the Dairy Cow bathroom for like, six hours?" Katie explains.

"That was so gross! So weird how we both got it at the same time right after Dusty's late-night party.." Sadie says.

"I know, right? The universe probably just KNOWS we're so compatible, that it gives us the same diseases!" Katie enthuses.

"Ooh, totally!" Sadie replies.

The boys, Owen, Cody, Tyler and DJ, walk together, all tied up. Tyler holds the case, all of them confident in their strut… except for Owen.

"Uh… Guys. I kinda have to go."

"Go where?"

"He means to the bathroom. Just turn around and take a whiz, we're all dudes here."

"Not number one… number poo." Owen bashfully admits, immediately getting groans and objections from his teammates. He blushes, looking down.

"Head for the woods, dude! Just make sure you put some serious distance between us." DJ orders.

"Yeaaah, we'll wait here." Tyler adds.

Owen wipes sweat from his brows, beginning to walk away… only to drag all the guys behind him. DJ sighs. "You gotta untie yourself first, man!"

"Oh, uh.." Owen tries to, but with little success. "I-I can't! My fingers are too big and this knot is like, the tightest I've ever seen!"

"Where did you learn these knots, the army?!" DJ snaps, looking down at Cody.

"Actually, it was a special after-school-"

"And you! Why didn't you go before we got tied up?" DJ directs his anger at Owen.

"I-I didn't have to go then! C-come on, guys this is serious!" Owen belly bumps the rope, again, to no avail. DJ pinches the bridge of his nose, all the guys looking at him for guidance.

"...You're just gonna have to.. Go." Owen hurriedly drags them all behind a bush, drops his pants and… yeah.

(Confessional: DJ)

"Tch, teaming up with Cody and Tyler seemed nice at first, get a little bonding time, plus Owen won the game. I wanted to bring the money home to Momma so we could get a better place, but not with these bozos. No offense, guys, I love y'all, but.. Damn."

(Confessional: Owen)

"I think DJ might be a little mad at me.. And grossed out. But we're guys! We'll get through this, no sweat. Okay, maybe some sweat, on account of the double deuce baby I had, ehehe."

(Confessional end)

"Augh! Sick!' Tyler recoils, hugging DJ for comfort, dropping the case on the ground. DJ closes his eyes and plugs his ears, while Cody gags and covers his face with his shirt. Meanwhile, Harold stealthily sneaks up to the case and nabs it, hurriedly running back to Heather.

"I gotta say, Harold, that was a pretty slick move." Heather compliments, hands on her hips.

"I learned it from a mail order ninja catalog from ." He informs.

"Let's move, before they find out it's gone!" Heather urges, taking the case from his hands and walking away as fast as she can. Harold sighs and follows closely behind, running like a geek.

"Finished! Anybody got any bark?" Owen asks/

"Eugh! Just find a leaf or something!" Tyler yells, immediately swinging his left arm. Owen grabs some leaf and does his thing.

"Wait a minute.. Tyler, where'd you put the case?" Cody asks, scanning the area after noticing his empty hand. Tyler frantically begins looking around, with DJ in shock.

"It's gone! Someone musta took it while I wasn't looking!" Tyler panics.

"Fuck! Oops, sorry, Momma." DJ blurts out before waving to a camera.

"We gotta go find it!" Owen exclaims.

"Okay, I think we should double back and go that way," Trent orders, pointing east, leading his team through the woods.

"Sounds like a good plan." LeShawna agrees.

Gwen nods. "For sure. Let's-"

As they stop, the loudspeaker goes off. "Attention, campers, the suitcase is now in a particularly slippery set of hands."

"Heather!" They all shout in unison.

Harold finishes tying up the last of a rag, on top of the one thousand foot cliff that overlooks the entire hellscape of the island. Heather stands behind him, case in hand. "I'm actually impressed, Harold. Where did you learn to make a hang glider out of branches and an old tent?"

Harold smirks. "I told you I had skills. I learned from kind of just tying my shoes in the creek by my house a lot, though."

"Very nice." Heather nods.. But catches herself and shakes her head, furrowing her brows.

"You know, we actually make a pretty solid team. I need you, you need me." Harold says, preparing the glider for take-off.

"I needed you. This is where we part ways." Heather kicks Harold in the shin, taking him down to the floor with a scream.

"AH! Gosh…"

Heather gets into the harness of the hang glider. "You didn't really think I was gonna split the money with you, did you?"

"Kinda.." Harold says.

Heather gets a running start. "If you learn one lesson from this, it's who to-" As she jumps, almost instantly, the glider explodes from the pressure of the knot and Heather is sent flailing down the cliff. Harold runs up to the edge and gawks as she and the briefcase fall to their deaths.

"Dang… That wasn't my best work." He laments.

Heather falls right into a beaver dam in the middle of a lake between two forestry areas. The case lands in the water, while her head lands inside of the Beavers' home, her wig falling in the lake and down a stream into the ocean, while the case floats down the opposite end.

"AH! NO! Gimme back my money, you stupid beavers!" Heather demands, two beavers looking directly at her. They take offense to the insult and one whacks her in the face with his hard tail. "Ow! S-stop it!" But they don't stop - continuing to slap her silly with their tails while giggling to themselves, her shrieks of pain and bruises being a cold reminder as to where betrayal gets you.

"Attention campers, the case is wet! I repeat, the case is wet!" Chris announces over the loudspeaker. Beth, Lindsay and Ezekiel gasp. They're near the end of the very lake Heather fell into.

"The case is wet? Quick, everyone in the water!" Lindsay orders, running into the greenish brownish summer camp ocean. Beth and Zeke follow obediently. "We're totally gonna find the case first!" She enthuses.

"Wicked strategizing, Lindsay!" Ezekiel compliments, giving her a thumbs up.

"Thanks, E-cigarette!" Lindsay replies.

(Confessional: Ezekiel)

"Hey, I think I'm gettin' better at this whole gentleman thing, eh!"

(Confessional end)

"So if we win, what would you guys do with your three hundred and thirty three thousand, three hundred and thirty three dollars and thirty three cents?" Beth asks enthusiastically.

"Is that enough to buy a country?" Lindsay questions.

"Yeah, but just a small one, eh." Ezekiel answers.

"Ooh, France is small, right?"

Both look at her with a hint of concern before Beth assures her, "No, sweetie, it's not."

"Oh." Lindsay lowers her head sadly.

"I'm gonna spend it on renovations on our farm, after I buy a boyfriend and a sports car." Beth says. "What about you, Ezekiel?"

"Me? Oh, nothin' huge. I'd probably just buy treatment for my pa's bronchitis. They said he was getting worse, the doctors, eh. So he can't work any more. I'd get him the best doctors I could find, and he'd get all better. You get me?"

"Awwww, that's so sweet!" Beth says, with Lindsay joining in her cooing. Zeke scratches the back of his neck and smiles dorkily.

"That's almost as cute as that case coming down the lake." Lindsay points at the million dollar briefcase swimming toward them.

"The case! Ah! Get it!" Beth yells, racing toward it. She manages to grab it in her arms, hugging it as if it was a family member. Zeke and Lindsay clap and cheer for her.

"I'm gonna be the queen of France!" Lindsay shouts.

"Good eyes, ladies." Ezekiel says.

"Thank you, Zeke. Let's go become rich!" Beth exclaims, ready to run for the dock. Suddenly, a fishing hook grabs the handle of the case and jerks Beth forward, knocking her over on top of Ezekiel. The case goes flying. Lindsay gasps.

"It's a flying case!"

"Reel her in, honey!" Bridgette cheers Geoff on, his struggle to bring the briefcase toward them felt by the surfer girl.

"I-I'm trying..! Ugh! Almost got it!" Geoff steps back, his arms rising above his head as the case pops up from the sea and plops onto the sand in front of them. Bridgette quickly takes it off the line and opens it. One million dollars is inside. She squeals, jumping up and down.

"It's real! It's real! You did it, Geoff, oh my god, you're amazing!" She jumps into his arms, squeezing his neck in a death grip. Geoff chokes, hugging her softly back.

"EugH! Thanks, baby, but… could you please let go, you're choking me."

Bridgette releases him. "Sorry, muffin. When we get back home, I'm gonna take you to every restaurant on your bucket list." She embraces his chin, looking sensually into his eyes.

"For real?! Well, when I get home, I'm gonna buy you any surfboard you want, including that deluxe model with your name on it!~" Geoff wraps an arm around her toned waist.

"The Bridgeroller 2000? Oh, Geoff..!" She kisses his cheek, rubbing her nose in it like an eskimo. Geoff giggles, picking up the case from the floor while closing it.

"To the docks!" Geoff shouts, running as fast as he can with his girlfriend's hand in his. Beth, Zeke and Lindsay watch in shock.

"S-swing around the island and take them by surprise! Get to the docks before they do!" Beth orders.

"Yes sir! I-I mean ma'am!" Ezekiel salutes, catching himself. The two of her friends follow in a hurry.

"Justin's taking a long time." Katie says, her voice echoing in the cave where she and Sadie are still waiting, sitting on the same rock.

"Let's play magic square!" Sadie suggests. Katie's face lights up.

"Ooh, okay!" She pulls out a pretty pink fortune teller made of paper with symbols written on it and begins to foretell the future. "Who will Katie hook up with tonight?" She folds one more time, revealing… "Justin! Yay!"

Sadie gasps. "Justin? But he has a crush on me!"

Katie raises a brow. "Says who?"

"Says the magic square!" Sadie snatches the device from Katie's hand, performing the same ritual. "Who is Justin crushing on? Sadie!"

Katie gasps now. "You fully stole him from me!"

"No way, you stole him from me!" Sadie points at Katie's arm accusatorily.

"Oh, is that how it's gonna be?" Katie questions, standing up.

"I guess so, boyfriend kisser!" Sadie insults. Katie recoils from the blow of her words and snatches back her magic square.

"We are so done as best friends!"

"Fine!" Sadie shouts, storming off. Katie folds her arms and follows her out of the cave.

"Double fine!"

Trent walks with his team, getting closer to the edge of the island. "Alright, if the case is wet… maybe-"

"The lake by the swamp? Yeah, good idea." Gwen and Trent speak in unison, laughing at each other. LeShawna playfully rolls her eyes.

(Confessional: LeShawna)

"Trent and Gwen are one cute couple. Too bad they bicker over practically everything in-between all that adorableness."

(Confessional end)

Beth, Lindsay and Ezekiel run right past them, barely able to catch their breaths. The three shrug, persisting in their walk. Eventually, they reach the beaver dam where Heather's booty shorts covered behind is sticking out and being slapped by a beaver. Gwen can't contain her immediate laughter, and LeShawna lets out a belly laugh right after. Trent hides his mouth behind his hand, smirking.

Heather gasps. "Who's out there? LeShawna, is that you?! Get me out of here!"

"Dang.. that looks-" Trent snorts, shaking his head. "Pretty bad. Should we help her?"

Silence overcomes the three before the laughter crescendos into an explosion of chuckling. All three of them walk away as Heather flails and kicks for her life. "You guys?! Trent? Gwen? Hey? Ow!" The beavers laugh, slapping her thighs and cheeks some more, adding to the bruises.

Geoff and Bridgette leg it to the Dock of Shame, dodging trees, small little critters in their holes in the ground, and eventually they run into Courtney, stopping right in front of her, taking this as a good moment to catch their breaths. "Courtney! H-hey..! You doing alright out here?"

"You have the case." Courtney;s eyes are glued to the case in Geoff's hand.

Bridgette looks down at it, then back up at Courtney's crazed, twitching eyes. "Um… Y-yeah, that's right. Cool, isn't it?"

"Uh, where's Duncan, Court?" Geoff worriedly asks, picking up on her strange vibe. Courtney looks between Geoff, the briefcase and Bridgette, over and over and over, biting her bottom lip as she takes a few steps closer, her hand reaching out. Geoff and Bridgette take a step back. "Courtney?"

She looks up at Geoff. "Oh. Duncan? He fell. He got hurt, and I'm looking for help." Her robotic delivery unsettles Geoff and Bridgette.

"Oh, I can help. Geoff, why don't you head to the dock, and I'll-"

"I'm sorry, Geoff!" Courtney grabs a handful of sand off of the ground and flicks it straight into Geoff's eyes, forcing him to release the case and Bridgette's hand as he clutches his face in pain.

"AH! My eyes! I got sand in my eyes, Bridge! AHH!"

"Geoff, oh my gosh! Courtney, what the fuck is wrong with you?!" Bridgette consoles her boyfriend as he slams his eyes shut and falls to his knees. Courtney runs for the case, takes it by the handle and sprints as hard as she can in the direction of camp. Bridgette helps Geoff up, grabbing a canteen from her pocket before pouring out water on his face. He gasps, some of the water running down his nose and mouth. He sputters and coughs, pointing at Courtney.

"G-get the case, babe!"

Bridgette holds his hand and chases her with him, disbelief and anger in her face. "I cannot believe she could do this to her own friends! What was she thinking?!"

(Confessional: Courtney)

"I can already hear what you're saying, and yes, I feel awful. Bridgette is my best friend! Geoff is my friend. I swear I will make it up to them when this is all over. But I need that money. I'm clearly not winning my lawsuit against Chris unless I somehow get maximum leverage, and the show is over. That's not gonna happen. If I'm ever gonna get into a good school, sacrifices need to be made. So unfortunately, I had to do.. That." She whimpers, rubbing her arm.

(Confessional end)

Eva and Noah run toward the Dock of Shame, still in the woods. "H-how much further?" Noah asks, barely able to breathe. He's lagging behind Eva.

"Not much. This strategy is perfect. We'll hide out, wait for Heather to come around here, and then WAM!" She pounds her fist. "She'll be dust and we'll be rich."

"Nice plan… Now, can we please.. Catch our breaths?" Noah pants, ironically still not wearing his. Eva looks back at him.

"You run like a girl." She degrades.

"My bad. Left my 'roids back at the gym." Noah replies sarcastically.

Izzy suddenly drops down in front of Eva, forcing her to grind her feet into the dirt lest she runs right into her. Noah doesn't get the memo and keeps running until he bumps into Eva's muscular back, falling over on his back. Eva takes a fighting position, while Izzy walks past her and drops Noah's pants on his face. "You're welcome!"

"You left us behind for the case, what do you want now?!" Eva shouts. Noah graciously begins putting his shorts back on.

"I never left you behind, geez Eva! All I did was follow the optimal strategy. I was expecting you guys to do the same." Izzy explains, turning around to face her. Noah stands up behind the crazy girl.

"Sorry, not all of us have the grip and mental fortitude of a chimpanzee. Some of us still have our dignities." Noah replies.

"Emphasis on some, boxer boy." Eva shoots. Noah rolls his eyes.

"Will you lay off?"

"Come on, guys, I'm still waiting for my thank you!"

"For what?"

Courtney gasps for air as she sprints toward them, her attention facing Bridgette and Geoff as she outruns them by quite a lot. Their yelling can be heard in the distance. "Get back here, Courtney! I'm not done with you!"

"Is that Bridgette?" Eva questions.

"She's pissed." Noah comments.

Courtney is so caught up with looking behind her that she fails to see the three to her right. Izzy lays her leg out like a spike trap and trips up Courtney, the case thrown up into the sky before Izzy easily catches it, with Courtney landing right on her face.

"That. Thank me for that." Izzy states. Noah claps.

"Color me impressed, psycho hose beast."

"Great, we got it, now let's go, come on, move!" Izzy urges, running faster than anyone else in the game has been able to so far. Eva picks up Noah bridal style, much to his embarrassment, and sprints behind her.

"Well, this is emasculating." Noah says.

"As if masculinity ever mattered to you." Eva replies, a touch of strain in her voice.

"Fair point." Noah responds.

Courtney picks herself up. "Hey! Get back here with my money! I need it! I-I… UGH!" She stomps the floor before taking off after them, not actually knowing where they went.

"You know what would be cute guys? If I changed my name! Yeah, to Kaleidoscope! You could call me E-Scope for short!" Izzy rambles.

Eva and Noah exchange a glance. "Suuuuure, whatever floats your boat, crazy lady. As long as we get our cut." Noah says.

"Don't you mean our cut, Noah?" A seductive, sexy, villainous voice asks from around the corner of a tree. Izzy stops in her tracks, looking around with her hand formed into a karate chop. Eva stops behind her, dropping Noah on his ass. Justin walks out from behind the tree and takes a bite of his apple before callously throwing the core toward a very ravenous chipmunk, who devours it with hearts in its eyes.

"Watch it, it's a trap!" Eva warns, her voice shaky like jelly.

"Justin. The anti me." Noah greets, shifting his eyes at him.

"Whatever you do, guys, don't look into his smoldering eyes! That's how he hypnotized me into being his girlfriend on the Playa!" Izzy closes her eyes and covers her face with her hand.

"Give me the case, ladies." Justin demands, softly.

"I'm a boy, thank you very much." Noah says, dusting himself off.

"Ladies and Noah." Justin corrects.

"Back off, really hot guy!" Izzy yells.

"I.. didn't want to have to do this, but.. You give me no choice." He takes his shirt off. Eva feels her heart throb, so she tries to look away. He approaches her and tilts her chin up, stealing a kiss from her. Izzy hears the kiss and in a fit of jealousy, opens her eyes and gets entranced, dazed and hypnotized. Justin shoves Eva aside, her entire body buzzing as she looks at him heart-eyed, falling to the ground, while Justin does the same to Izzy. He cups her face and then kisses her, his hand grabbing hers before slowly taking the case away. He squeezes her soft hand as his lips leave hers. She moans quietly. Noah goes to get it back, but gets yanked to the floor by Eva's hand.

"He's so pretty… he deserves it." Eva whispers.

"Thank you." Justin says, walking off. The girls watch his ass leave, sighing dreamily. Noah dusts himself off again as he stands up.

"Are. You. Kidding me?!" Noah yells.

(Confessional: Justin)

"Do I think that I ride on my good looks - that I use them to my advantage? Do I think being really, really, ridiculously good looking has given me the upper hand in life? Ahahahahaha!... duh!"

(Confessional end)

A blushing Izzy finally blinks herself back to reality once Justin is already gone. "W-what happened?! Where's the case?!"

Eva has the same response, standing up urgently. Noah pinches the bridge of his nose. "You just handed it to a male model. And a lot of good YOU were." He looks at Eva, furrowing his bushy brows. Eva lowers her head.

"I'm so ashamed…"

"You should be, iron woman, that was seriously pathetic." Noah adds.

(Confessional: Eva)

"What am I going to do?! I'll never be able to show my face at the gym again. I'll be an outcast! A leper! I let a guy talk me into giving away one million dollars?!"

(Confessional end)

"Attention, campers, the case is now somewhere beautiful and is heading towards camp." Chris' voice booms over the island.

"E-scope will not allow him to get away, no matter how hot he is! Come on!" Izzy, or, E-scope, orders.

"Yeah! We'll CRUSH HIS SKULL!" Eva punches her palm.

"A little too far." Noah warns.

"Sorry, sorry.. Still working on that." Eva replies bashfully.

Bridgette groans, kicking the dirt. "Ugh, we lost her! I-I can't believe it.. You think you know a person!"

"Relax, babe." Geoff, now with red eyes, consoles, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Maybe she'll share the money with us?"

"But that's not the point. She assaulted you, she betrayed my trust!" Bridgette states.

"Yeah… that bit. And was that whole Duncan story real? Like, was he in on it, or is he really hurt?" Geoff questions.

"I don't know. I don't know what to do." Bridgette sits down on a rock, her head in her hands, taking a deep breath in. Geoff sighs and sits down next to her for comfort.

Courtney sulks by a tree, leaning against it completely out of breath. "I lost the case… to a case?! Ugh.. I did all of that horrible shit just for-..." She cuts herself off, noticing the camera. She toughens up her face and walks away. "I have got to find Izzy…"

Heather, finally free, walks down the path toward the end of the lake, bruises covering her legs, annunciating her butt, protruding from her head, and on top of her bald head. She walks with frustration in her movement and anger in her fists. Then, the sound of a particularly deep voice cuts into her silent rage.

"Encountered some beavers, eh?" Harold questions, rowing in the stream beside her in a totally safe canoe. "Yeah, they can get pretty territorial. Especially when they-"

"You know what? So far today I have been thrown off a cliff, by YOU, attacked by beavers, left to die and I lost one million dollars, which I'm kinda hoping to get back, so I'm really not in the mood for your Harold-ness right now!" Heather rants.

"You know, you don't have to always be so mean." Harold says.

Heather glares at him. "Excuse me?"

"Maybe if you were nicer to people, you'd actually have some friends."

"I have friends. People like me. I'm popular!" Heather argues defensively.

"I know tons of people who are popular that everybody hates. Just because people tolerate you at school, doesn't mean they'll tolerate you in the real world. And even then, the only reason popular people have 'friends' is because they can offer something to them, like popularity or cool parties. But you can't offer anything to anyone." Harold counters.

"You're alone all the time, what's your excuse?" Heather stops walking, folding her arms insecurely.

"I'm alone by choice. I'm kind of like a lone wolf. Besides, I have friends. Just ask Cody, or my buddy Noah, or Tyler, or anyone from Magic club. We're all cool with each other. Even ignoring them, I dated LeShawna. Honestly, Heather, and I'm not blaming you, but I think LeShawna left me because I worked with you." Harold explains.

Heather sniffles, sitting at the edge of the lake. Harold parks by her. "Why would you even hang out with me if I'm the reason your relationship failed?"

"You're not the reason my relationship failed. People being unable to get along in their teenage years is the reason I'm single. I love LeShawna, truly, but even I think the extent she's willing to go to get back at you for stuff you did weeks ago is petty." He answers.

Heather starts crying, her voice breaking. "I don't like being mean all the time. It's just become this habit of mine ever since high school, the only thing that protects me from being attacked. Do you think it's fun being the person that everyone hates? Look at me, I don't even have any hair."

"Maybe you're so afraid everyone will reject you, that you push them away first. I'm guessing either your parents are divorced, or you were really fat and pimply once."

"One of those is correct… I wish the other one was too." She wipes her nose with her wrist. "H-how do you know so much?"

"Believe it or not, I wasn't always this cool. Plus I read a lot of my sister's psyche books in the can." She laughs, genuinely. Harold smiles, offering a hand. "Want a ride?"

"Really? After everything I did to you?" Heather asks.

"Yeah. For a 60/40 split. It's either that or walk four kilometers to camp, and I'm pretty sure those beavers are still looking for you."

"Impressive extortion skills. Deal." Heather walks toward the canoe, jumping in behind him. He begins rowing.

"Hey, think we'll be friends after this is over?" Harold asks.

"Definitely." Heather smiles at him. He turns around and rows slightly faster, content. Then she notices a cameraman nearby and shakes her head no with gritted teeth.

Meanwhile, at the Dock of Shame, a flatscreen TV is set up powered by a generator at the end of the dock. Chris and Chef, sitting on lawn chairs in their bathing suits, are watching all the action of the show while throwing popcorn into their mouths. Chef seems a little distracted by his phone though. It buzzes and he laughs at whatever he got sent. Chris narrows his eyes at it.

"What?" Chris asks curiously. Chef shows Chris a picture of a chubby, middle aged black woman wearing lingerie, seductively lying on her couch. Chris recoils, his hand over his mouth. "Aw, Chef, sick! That chick's like forty years old, fifty maybe! What is wrong with you?"

"And how old do you think I am? I date within my range, unlike some people!" Chef argues, putting his phone away.

"You're just jealous because my new girlfriend sucks better than you ever did." Chris states, looking away condescendingly.

"I don't suck!" Chef yells.

"Yeah, exactly." Chris fires back.

"My new girlfriend doesn't ask me to go down on her! How about that?!" Chef barks.

"Great, perfectly fine, sounds perfect to me! Going down on you was like sucking hair out of a vacuum cleaner." Chris insults.

"Oh that is just low!" Chef leans over the chair.

Chris faces him, anger in his eyes. "Not as low as-"

"Uh.. guys? The camera's still rolling." A young, red haired teenager wearing glasses and dressed in a beige uniform alerts them, her voice nasally. Chris and Chef freeze, slowly looking toward the camera.

"Um… Ahaha.. W-will Courtney apologize to Bridgette? Will Justin get defeated by team Izzy? Or whatever? Uh-.. and what will become of Zeke and Beth? F-find out all this and more.. On Total Drama. Hurry up and cut to comm-"

We'll be right back!

Justin, now wearing his shirt, struts his happy self to camp, briefcase in hand and a whistle in his lips. He's almost out of the woods now. "I think you have something that belongs to us!" Tyler says, instigating immediately.

Justin smirks. "Come and get it." A chicken bone flies into his face. "Ah! …Hah.. Is that the best you got?"

"No!" Owen yells.

"Hey, where'd you get that chicken wing?" Tyler asks.

"I got an extra bunch from the party in my pocket. Want one?" He shows the greasy, saucy wings to Tyler, who instinctively takes a step to the side. Not that he can go far.

"Guys! Focus! We got a case to take back. And we're not falling for your pretty boy games this time. Right, Owen?" DJ looks at his friend, who is completely entranced with Justin.

"What…?" Tyler slaps him. "Oh, right!"

"Now give us the case or we'll mess you up!" Tyler threatens.

"No."

Silence. The guys all look between each other. "What do we do now?"

Cody thinks, but it doesn't take long for an idea to come to him. He smiles. "Look! The paparazzi!" He points behind Justin, who immediately gasps, wiping the sauce off of his face before overcompensating by tearing his shirt off and posing, dropping the case in the process. Owen, DJ, Tyler and Cody all run toward him, trampling over him whilst nabbing the case thanks to Cody's quick hands. They don't look back, even as Justin is trampled and barely able to breathe. "Pleasure doing business with ya! Woohoo!" The guys join in on Cody's jeering as they leave him behind.

"My… hair…" He croaks.

Courtney watches from behind a tree before stealthily following them through any hidden avenue she can crouch under. The guys all end up running way too far away, ending up exactly where Harold and Heather were when they lost the safe: the one thousand foot cliff. "What now?!" Owen questions.

"Turn back." DJ orders, the entire group turning around so Owen leads the charge now. Before they can take another step though, a bear shows its big, furry face, snarling and growling at the group as it stares at the case. "Oh no… easy, Mr. Bear.."

"W-what does it want?" Tyler asks. Owen lifts the case up above his head and its eyes follow.

"I think it wants the case!" DJ says.

"What? Why?" Cody asks.

"The case is wet, maybe the smell from local trout is all over it. We're doomed!" DJ yelps.

"We might have to throw the case, Owen." Tyler states, worry in his voice.

"Nahhh, I bet it's Izzy under there." Owen says casually, walking toward the bear before placing his hands on its jaw and opening its mouth. "Izzy? You in there?"

"RAAAAAWWWWWWRRRRRRR!" The bear screeches back, covering Owen in saliva and whipping his hair back. He blinks in shock.

"Uh… nope. That's not Izzy..!" Everyone screams, but it's Owen who hot tails it right off the edge of the cliff, upsetting the order of the make-shift centipede and throwing the case. DJ catches it before it can go too far, clinging onto Tyler desperately. They all fall, but Owen manages to grip right into the cliff's edge, screaming loudly and in sheer terror as his fingers dig into the dirt. The bear approaches, sniffing hungrily. The others cling on to Owen for dear life.

"Whatever you do… do not let go!" DJ yells. The bear lurches, standing up with its claws drawn. Salivating, it starts to strike, only for Courtney to grab it by the back and throw it behind her like a martial artist, tumbling it down the cliff. Courtney pants, adrenaline clear in her eyes. Tyler grins.

"Courtney! Please, help us!" He begs. Courtney kneels down, but as soon as she does her eyes spot DJ holding the case and she hesitates, biting her bottom lip. DJ gasps.

"Courtney! What are you waiting for?!"

"A-ah.. I'm slipping!" Owen panics, his hands, clammy from sweat, slowly slipping off the edge until at last Courtney takes them in hers and slowly begins pulling them up. But this weight proves to be too much. The cliff cracks, much to the horror of everyone dangling off of it. Scared for her own life, Courtney drags Owen's arms and jumps, the cliff giving out under his weight. They all fall, but Courtney pulls back from Owen to save herself. The guys are lucky enough to land directly on a camera guy in a production balloon, all of them alive.

"We're okay? We're okay!" Owen cheers, standing up off of his teammates. They all groggily stand up, with DJ helping the hispanic giant of a man they crushed.

"Sorry, buddy.." DJ cradles the passed out intern.

"Alright, thanks for the assist, Courtney! Let's head to the Dock of Shame!" Cody exclaims, picking the case up in his hands. Courtney sighs, relieved they're okay, before furrowing her brows.

"Hey, what about me? I helped save your lives. Don't I get some portion of the money? Come on, let me join you! I swear I won't take too big of a cut!" Courtney clasps her hands together, begging them. DJ leans forward, about to draw his hand and open his mouth to speak. The other guys look uneasy.

"She makes a good point, but she's not a part of our team. Besides, we all need the money. How else am I supposed to pay to pass my exams so I can join a college hockey team?" Tyler argues, cutting DJ off. The balloon is now on an equal level to the cliff, but not on it, instead suspended in front of it.

"Come on, DJ, we're friends! I'm begging you here. I already lost Duncan…" Courtney begs, tears in her eyes. DJ scratches the back of his neck.

"Come on, DJ, think about your mom! She needs all the help she can get, right?" Owen pleads.

"Yeah, and I have an entire PC to build! My dad won't give me the money, but with this, I can fund an entire Steam Library full of triple A titles!" Cody adds.

"That's all trivial in the face of what matters most: the fact that you're still alive because of me. Doesn't our friendship mean anything to you?" Courtney questions, her voice breaking as she holds out her hand.

DJ closes his eyes and grits his teeth, sweating bullets before finally shouting, "Alright, alright! Hop in." He steers the balloon into the cliff, helping Courtney inside. His teammates watch quietly, all bothered by this. DJ looks back at them. "What? Are you all serious right now? It's a million dollars! Courtney will get the smallest cut, if that'll make you feel better."

"You're welcome for saving your lives, by the way!" Courtney states.

Owen looks down shamefully. "Sorry… I guess the money really got to our heads."

"Yeah, our bad." Tyler says.

Courtney points her nose up. "Hm. Let's go to the Dock and get off of this crappy island."

(Confessional: Courtney)

"Those jerks were really going to cut me out completely after what I did for them?! I'd obviously never let anybody die, especially not DJ, but… Ugh! When we get home, I'm working an angle with my lawyers and ensuring I get the biggest cut. Mark my words."

(Confessional end)

Geoff and Bridgette are still sitting on a rock together, with Geoff finally standing up with a sigh. Bridgette raises an eyebrow, defeat in her voice. "Where are you going?"

"Well, we can't just give up, Bridge. We gotta-"

"MOoooaaa." The moan of an animal close by cuts off Geoff. The two exchange a look before walking towards the noise carefully. Peering around a tree they find a baby moose, trying in vain to nab a piece of leaf hanging from a tree. Bridgette pouts.

"Aww, it's starving. Geoff, help it out." She tugs on her boyfriend's arm. He smiles and starts slowly walking closer.

"Haha, come here, little dude.." Geoff grabs the branch and brings it down. Bridgette leans on him as the sad little guy turns into a happy one, graciously cooing before chewing on the leaf.

"Aww… so cute. Woah-" Bridgette leans in a little too close and accidentally shoves Geoff right into the moose, collapsing right on top of it.

"Oof!" He blinks, immediately standing up as the moose begins crying. "Ah! S-sorry, little guy! H-here, let me make it-"

Huff.

"Geoff…" Bridgette whispers, pointing forward at what must be a 7 foot moose blowing hot air their way. Geoff immediately stumbles back, hands up in defense as he guards Bridgette. Fear is in his eyes.

"Oh… y-you must be his mama. Nice to meet- Ah!" The moose charges forward, chasing Geoff and Bridgette away screaming.

(Confessional: Geoff)

"I love Bridgette. I've never met anyone like her. There's nobody I'd rather spend Christmas down under with… I'm afraid she's gonna kill me by the end of the day on total accident."

(Confessional end)

Duncan limps along the dirt road, trotting through seemingly endless trees, forestry and mud, murmuring "Stupid million bucks… stupid…" to himself every few seconds, his fists tightened and his brow furrowed in anger.

A few steps away, a fork in the road. Coming through the west toward the middle are Gwen, Trent and LeShawna. "Nothing. Not by the water," Gwen starts.

"Or by any of the waterfalls." LeShawna adds.

"What could we possibly be doing wrong?" Trent questions, stopping.

"Maybe you're just not being thorough enough." Duncan says, getting their attention. Trent immediately gets on guard, scanning the hobbling punk up and down. Gwen and LeShawna notice his wonky stance.

"Ooh, what happened to you?" Gwen asks, concerned.

"Courtney happened. I was wrestling an alligator for the case-"

Trent rolls his eyes. "An alligator? Pfft, get real, Duncan. That didn't happen."

"Believe what you want, guyliner, it happened. We had the case briefly, but I twisted my ankle and Courtney left me for dead." Duncan explains.

"She left you behind? Now that is messed up." LeShawna says, shaking her head.

"When did you last see the case?" Trent asks.

"It flew into a bunch of stupid trees. Why am I telling you anything?" Duncan leans against a tree for leverage, his hands on his knee. Gwen bumps Trent with her elbow, walking up to Duncan. Trent rubs his shoulder.

"Hey, relax. We're not gunning against you." Gwen says.

Duncan squints at Trent. "Sure.." Trent squints back.

"Wanna join up with us?" Gwen asks.

Trent's face falls. "Aw what?"

Duncan smiles. "I'm not sure your boyfriend would appreciate that. Also pretty sure I'd just slow you down."

"Like we're getting that stupid case anyways. We're not heartless. Right, Trent?" LeShawna says, staring at her remorseless friend. Trent looks between his girl's judge-filled stare, his friend's raised eyebrow and Duncan's pained expression and sighs, approaching him.

"...Eugh. Come on, hold on to my shoulder." He holds his arm out, which Duncan takes wordlessly to lean against. That's when an ATV and a big, dysfunctional cook ride up to the group.

"Have any of you seen a hot air balloon 'round here? Courtney stole one and-"

"Wait, Courtney stole a hot air balloon?" Gwen questions.

"Woah, from PB&J's to hijackings? Not bad, princess, not bad." Duncan smirks, shaking his head at the sky.

"It's a rental! We need it back before she either kills herself and gets blood in it or it explodes." Chef states.

"Does she have the case?" Trent asks.

Suddenly Chris' voice booms from the loud speakers. "Attention campers: The case is going up, up and away towards the Dock of Shame! Get your butts into high gear, kiddos!"

"Does that answer your question? If I had to put my money on anyone winning this thing, it would be-"

Thunk!

Chef drops like a sack of potatoes, twitching on the ground. LeShawna throws her thick stick baton to the side before hopping on the hefty red ATV. Duncan, Gwen and Trent are shocked. She revs the motor. "Well, are you coming or what?"

Duncan shrugs, climbing on behind her, his arms around her pudgy stomach. "Nice use of brute force, LeShawna. Didn't know you had it in you."

"Duncan, I was born and raised in the projects. And with that money, we're gettin' outta of it." LeShawna says, grinning. Gwen and Trent get on the tail of the ATV, both clinging to Duncan's forehead and neck as LeShawna speeds away.

Meanwhile, Katie and Sadie walk towards the dock of shame together. Sadie leads the way, her arms folded and her nose held high as she keeps a healthy distance away from her ex BFFFL. "So are you still not talking to me?" Katie asks. No response.

"Fine. Because I'm totally not talking to you. So don't even try, because I won't hear you either." Katie tries again. Sadie grins victoriously, but otherwise stays quiet. Katie puts her hands over her ears. "I'm not listening! Not listening! You hear me? Don't care, lalalala-"

The screams of Geoff and Bridgette slowly get louder and louder as they run behind the girls. "RUN!" They exclaim, rocketing past them. Sadie and Katie stop, looking behind them.

"From what?" Sadie asks, breaking her silence. Their eyes go wide as the mother moose from earlier charges toward them. Sadie and Katie scream, running as fast as they can.

Courtney sits on the edge of the hot air balloon while Cody steers. DJ holds onto the case with his life while the others melancholily wait for the Dock of Shame landing. Using her phone, she hits a few numbers on her calculator. "Okay, so, I've tallied up how we should divide the money."

"20% equal split, right? That's pretty basic math, Court." Cody chuckles awkwardly. Courtney looks offended.

"Um, did you forget about the part of today where I saved your lives?"

"Technically, the camera guy saved our lives. Right, Lenny?"

Owen poses the unconscious camera guy and hides behind his back. "Oh, yes, I am a hero! Give me some of that money, Tyler. Hehehee!" Owen mimes, giggling.

"This is serious." Courtney says, hands on her hips.

"Fine, what did you have in mind?" DJ asks, a little frustration in his voice.

"I get sixty percent, while the rest of you get ten." There's a wave of begrudging objections thrown at her immediately, causing her to recoil. "What? You all still get 100,000 dollars! That was the original cash prize."

"A million dollars is at stake, Courtney! That's just not fair!" Owen says. Courtney's eyes flicker, and she jumps toward him, pressing into him so he's forced against the edge. All the guys watch in fear.

"Fair? You wanna talk about fair? How about getting rigged out of the show two episodes before the merge, three episodes before the official merge, on the day you receive your first kiss, on the day you start dating your boyfriend, the very same boyfriend who bullied the nerd who RIGGED THE VOTES and got you ELIMINATED! Is that fair too?!" Courtney lashes out, tears in her eyes and a singular jagged finger in Owen's face. Owen looks down sadly.

"Sorry…" He mumbles. Courtney takes a few steps back and sits down again.

"Courtney.. What has gotten into you?" DJ questions softly. Courtney looks away, blinking away her emotions. She shakes her head.

"I saved your lives, I'm getting a bigger cut than the rest of you. That's final." She states, finality in her voice. Tyler scoffs.

"We'll see about that." He mumbles.

Underneath them, at the Dock of Shame, Harold and Heather row to land. Heather gasps, pointing at the balloon. "Look! That must be where the case is!"

"Excelsior! We're just in time!" Harold exclaims.

"Come on!" Heather grabs Harold's hand, which is surprisingly warm, and unsurprisingly sweaty. He gives the camera googly eyes. She leaps out of the canoe with him and begins running.

LeShawna sees them, stopping the ATV. Her passengers look confused. "Uh, okay, are we getting off now?" Gwen asks. LeShawna glares at the two pale, skinny losers holding hands, seething with rage. She revs the handles.

"Uh… LeShawna? I-I'm sure it's not what it looks like. Calm down." Trent says. She grits her teeth and revs again, leaning forward. Duncan tugs on her shirt.

"D-dude, come on, it's not worth it! The case is just up there! We should be-"

KRRRRRR!

"LESHAWNA, NO!" Her passengers shout, clinging onto each other as tight as they can. LeShawna speeds into the pair. Harold and Heather scream, running down the Dock of Shame as LeShawna chases after them, eventually leading to Harold and Heather jumping into the lake and LeShawna driving herself and her passengers into the ocean as well. Chris watches from the west side of the dock and snickers behind his hand. They all emerge, coughing up water.

"What the fuck was that for?!" Heather demands.

"Yeah, what the hell?! You could have killed us." Trent critiques. LeShawna blushes, her anger turning into embarrassment.

"A warning would have been nice. You know, to let us get off?" Gwen states.

"Ah, my leg stings so damn bad.." Duncan hisses. Harold leaps into her arms and snuggles into her bosom.

"That was awesome!" LeShawna smiles, but gently pushes him away.

"I- sorry, y'all. I think I let my emotions get the better of me." She mutters.

"You think?" Gwen says.

(Confessional: LeShawna)

"I don't know what happened! I saw Harold and Heather together, holding hands like we used to… jealousy came over me! Hey, he was my man first. But… I mean, I don't care or nothing. Who would? Psht."

(Confessional: Heather)

"I don't know what LeShawna's deal is but the show is over! She can quit harassing me now. Ugh, so annoying."

(Confessional: Harold)

"She still loves me! The jealousy, the anger, it was… so charming.."

(Confessional end)

Chris approaches and slowly claps. "Okay, perfect! That was amazing! Great work, people. Now, stay in there, you're out of the competition."

"WHAT?!" They all shout.

"Ah-ah-ah, don't get antsy! Just stay there. I have very special plans for all of you." Chris explains, walking away to watch the rest of the competition. Duncan punches the water in frustration.

"Nice going, LeShawna." Heather mutters bitterly.

"My bad, y'all, my bad." LeShawna holds her hand up in accountability.

In the fish cabin, Izzy, Noah and Eva are getting dressed with the deer and hunter outfits from Painball Deer Hunt. Izzy is a hunter, while Noah and Eva are deer.

"Tell me why we're getting dressed up again?" Noah questions.

"I feel kind of dumb." Eva growls.

"Because that way he won't see us coming! Now remember, the minute you have that pretty boy Justin in your sights," She gives Noah a bucket of fish, then does the same for Eva. "Fire at will!" She picks up a bucket for herself. "And then, take the case back. Have ya got that?!"

"Yes, Sergeant E-Scope!" Noah and Eva shout in unison, saluting her.

(Confessional: Izzy)

"Ooh, I love this commando stuff! I swear I would be so good in the army! No one would see me coming, it would be so fun! The military can trust me with all the heavy artillery in the world, uh-huh! This one time, I stole the gun from my grandpa's Vietnam War shrine and fired it next to his ear, and guess what?! He totally died of cardiac arrest from the shock! Miss you, gramps, kisses!"

(Confessional: Noah and Eva)

"Trusting Izzy? Not exactly on my TDI bingo card." Noah says.

"And this costume? Hideous." Eva states.

"But you can't deny…"

"It's kinda cool roleplaying as veterans taking down that walking bombshell." Eva smiles.

"We should totally play WOW when we get back home." Noah offers his hand. Eva gives him a high-five.

"Only if it doesn't stink."

(Confessional end)

As they exit the boat house, Geoff, Bridgette, Sadie, Katie and a blood thirsty moose race past them. They dive for cover, watching as the baby moose follows slowly behind his mom, mooing at her to keep going.

"Over here!" Bridgette yells, pointing at the giant pool of green jelly along with the over twenty foot diving board to go along with it. The hot air balloon floats over the pool.

"Ewww.." Courtney wrinkles her nose at the pool, looking away. "Why is that vat of snotty goop back?"

Noah gasps from the ground, pointing at the balloon as he emerges from a bush. "Look! Up, up and away, the case MUST be in that hot air balloon!"

Izzy rolls out while Eva climbs. "Then it's time for plan B:" Izzy gives both Noah and Eva tranquilizer guns. "Shoot to kill!"

Geoff and Bridgette start climbing up the ladder, but frantically get to the top in no time at all. Sadie and Katie scurry up as well, with Sadie leading. She stops suddenly, panting. "Oh, Katie… I forgive you for everything earlier. I never want to fight again."

"Awww, I forgive you too! I can't stand when you do silent treatment, your voice is just the cutest!" Katie replies.

"No way, your voice is the cutest!" Sadie compliments.

"Awww.." Katie swoons.

HRRUH!

BANG!

The moose rams the ladder, throwing Sadie and Katie off of it. Sadie lands right on top of the moose back and screams, her legs kicking and blocking its vision as it frantically runs around blinded. Katie runs away from it screaming.

Izzy, Eva and Noah take position. "Ready… Aim… Fire!" Izzy commands, the tranq darts hurling into the balloon itself, blowing air out of the giant sack. Courtney gasps.

"We're being shot at! R-right over the jelly!" Courtney shouts, shaky as she clings onto DJ, who simply screams in terror.

"Everybody stay in! If we all try to jump out, we could die. But, if we stay in, the worst that can happen is we land in the pool of jelly. Just stay calm and hold onto something!" Cody immediately wraps his arms around Owen, which Tyler and DJ copy, the case falling out of his hands. Owen hugs all of them, except Courtney who purposely dodges his tree trunk arm. She starts hyperventilating.

"T-the jelly… we're going to fall into the… j-jelly… no, so.. Snotty, so.. Green.." She looks down. The case is right there. She picks it up and runs off the edge of the basket, jumping to avoid the pool.

"COURTNEY!" The guys call out, with DJ reaching out to save her. She screams as she falls, holding onto the case for dear life.

"Hey, what happened to my ATV?!" Chef, holding his head in pain, questions, walking towards the dock. He walks near the pool, and as a result gets flattened by Courtney landing on him, knocking him out again.

"We gotta get that case!" Tyler erupts, running toward the front of the basket.

"NO NO NO NO!" The guys clamor, Tyler's speed and strength forcing them all out of the balloon and into the vat of jelly. Instead of landing inside and being all gooped up and sticky, the jelly has a reaction to the mass and number of contestants leaping into it, bouncing them up like a trampoline high into the sky, way into the clouds.

Cody wets himself, passing out. It trickles onto Tyler. "AH! Cody! W-weak!"

As they all descend, they screech their lungs out, up until they land in the Dock of Shame's lake. They emerge sputtering. "We're alive! Ahaha! Oh, I'll never fly again - never!" Owen hugs himself, the rope that kept his group together now floating like a rubber duck in the water. DJ manages to stay above water by holding onto Owen's shoulders.

"We lost the case! What do we do now?"

"Now, you stay there, because you're outta the competition. Ooh, hold that thought." Chris puts a hand out, not really looking at the faces of disappointment from the guys as he watches what's happening at camp.

Geoff and Bridgette hold onto each other as the diving board rocks back and forth and the hot air balloon crashes into the pool below them. "Geoff… I'm really, really sorry I got us into this mess."

"No, babe, it's okay.. I'm sorry too! Ah, at least we're safe for now."

DING!

The moose knocks itself out after headbutting the ladder again, with Sadie falling down on top of it. The ladder breaks, pushing them into the vat of green jelly. They scream, but luckily survive as they hit the jelly and get thrown into the lake in front of Wawanakwa.

Izzy pumps her fist. "Yes! Good job, Team E-scope! Let's go get that case from that insane woman!" The ginger commands, sprinting toward Courtney.

"And that's coming from the insane woman." Noah quips, following her. Eva follows too.

Courtney slowly rises to her feet, the case in one hand. Her eyes blink into focus, meeting Chris' as he smirks at her and waits at the end of the dock. She catches her bearings, gets into a take-off position and starts running toward the finish line.

Ping!

A tranquilizer dart hits Courtney in the neck. She gasps, dropping the case to clutch the affected area, dropping to her knees. She looks at the source of the shot… Izzy. The crazy girl blows imaginary smoke from her gun and grins. "N-...no…" She drops to the floor, unconscious. The case bounces all the way to the communal washroom, where Ezekiel is waiting outside for Beth and Lindsay to get done girl-talking. Lindsay emerges first. Ezekiel holds the door for her while Beth follows behind her.

(Confessional: Ezekiel)

"We were waiting for a while, eh. So I talked to Beth. She seemed really giggly, and then she said she wanted to go freshen up. I kinda assumed that she wanted to freshen up for me, so…"

(Confessional end)

Ezekiel jumps forward, dips Beth and kisses her on the lips, putting all of his power into smooching her. She gasps, embracing him… only to get hit with his nasty, atrocious, wallpaper peeling toxic breath. She screams but nothing comes out, shoving him away. He blushes, tugging his hat over his eyes.

"S-s-sorry, eh!"

"Gosh, Zeke.. that was so romantic… but you're just.. I mean.. Gosh.. it's really bad, your breath. Like, really bad." Beth grimaces as she speaks.

"Oh my gosh…" Zeke blushes, his voice breaking.

"Yeah… Um, sorry. I'm not interested. You're the first boy I've ever had to reject. W-wear it with pride, ehehe.." Beth forces a smile.

Ezekiel forces an awkward laugh before sadly walking away. Lindsay pats her friend on the shoulder with a frown before noticing the case. "Oh, hey, Beth, look. Isn't that the-"

"The case!" Beth exclaims. Lindsay bends over to pick it up, hugging it with joy in her full smile.

Rrrrrrrrrrrrrr….

The roar of an engine and the shadow of a crop duster alert the girls to a certain supermodel's presence. A petite female intern drives while Justin, wearing a helmet and parachute, slides open the side door, gives her an air kiss goodbye and leaps out of the plane, soaring down from the sky like a fallen angel. Beth can't help but watch, swooning over him until he pulls his chute and descends upon them.

"Wow… He can fly." Lindsay mutters.

"Like an angel.." Beth mumbles.

He lands before them. "Ladies, can I have that case?" Justin asks, throwing off his helmet as his chute lands like a blanket over Beth.

"Of course you can!" Lindsay says, handing him over the case. Justin winks at the camera.

"Not so fast, pretty boy!" Eva shouts, running up behind him before hitting him over the head with the bucket of fish, drenching his hair and skin in mackerel.

"UGH! OH GOD! THEIR GREASY BODIES ARE RUINING MY PERFECT SKIN! GET IT OFF GET IT OFF!" He runs around like a headless chicken, past Lindsay, dragging both the blonde and the geek towards the Dock of Shame. Noah claims the briefcase that fell out of his hands and smirks.

"Would you look at that model, flailing like a headless chicken. How sad." Noah comments, running toward the dock too. Eva and Izzy follow. Justin takes the bucket off and sees the group. He grabs a fish from his shoulder and throws it at Eva, whose focus is on the finish and nothing else. She gets smacked in the face and falls to her back. Noah goes wide eyed, stopping in front of the dock. "Eva, no!"

BANG!

The bucket gets launched at Noah's head and knocks him out, the case tumbling down toward the end of the dock. Izzy and Justin chase after it, with Beth and Lindsay forced to follow him due to their entrapment under his dragging parachute. Eva stands up, wiping her face of grease. She knows she can make the jump from the side of the beach to the dock… but Noah is knocked out. She frowns and runs toward the bookworm, hunching down to take the bucket off of his head.

"Noah! Noah, are you okay?"

Noah's eyes slowly open, his hand cradling his temple. "I… I'm concussed?"

"Oh thank god." She hugs his head to her stomach, making him squeak.

"Eugh.. you smell like sweat and B.O. Thanks for staying with me." He smiles.

"Sure, pansy." She grins back.

Izzy is about to reach the case while Chris watches with intense excitement. "Izzy, or Justin! Who will win it all?!" With sparkles in his eyes, he watches as Justin leaps at Izzy, tackles her by the waist and launches her into the water, along with himself. The case bounces off the edge of the dock and flies past the eliminated contestants and their grabbing, needy, greedy hands, right into a shark's mouth.

Everyone is speechless. Except a seagull, who laughs before being completely devoured by the same shark.

Owen, Izzy, Tyler, DJ, Cody, Duncan, Gwen, Trent, LeShawna, Harold, Heather, Geoff, Bridgette, Justin, Lindsay and Beth stare at the water in awe of their situation. Chris walks up to them from his high platform. "So… you lost the case. Way to go. I didn't wanna have to do this, but since none of the sixteen of you officially won… you all officially tied. Which means that you will all have another shot at the million… in Season 2!"

(Confessional: LeShawna)

"Did he just say season 2?"

(Confessional: Heather)

"Nope, nuh-uh, no way. They can't make me do another season."

(Confessional: Lindsay)

"Season 2? Season 2? No way! I'm gonna be so much more famous than I thought!"

(Confessional: Tyler)

"Another shot, huh? This time I'll make it past the teams merging! I won't let my fans down. Where's my Tyler nation at?!"

(Confessional: Geoff)

"Season 2? Wooooohoooo! Another chance to party!... but then, won't we have school to go to?"

(Confessional: Bridgette)

"So… Guess I have another shot at the million. I'm honestly still processing all of this. Woohoo?"

(Confessional: Harold)

"Season 2? Sweet! More chances to show off my mad skills, and impress my lovely ladies..~ this one's for you, mom! Hiiiyah!" He punches the air, hitting his elbow on the wall. "OWWOW! Ooh, funny bone. Hehe, that actually is kinda funny..!"

(Confessional: Duncan)

"We're doing another season? Seriously? Ugh. At least the prize money's gonna be good. Wonder if my parole officer will allow it though. We didn't really negotiate for this."

(Confessional: Izzy)

"Boom! Kaleidoscope's going to the silver screen, again! All aboard the E-Scope wins hype train! Choo-choo!"

(Confessional: DJ)

"Oh… Another season. I was kinda hoping to go home. Uh… that's cool, I guess. I'll win this time for you, Momma. Please send more videos and treats! I really miss your cooking."

(Confessional: Cody)

"So you're telling me Gwen and I will be on another season together? I mean, uh… hey, hehe, I can totally buy you whatever you want, Kim. This is gonna rule!"

(Confessional: Owen)

"I may have blown it the first time, but come on, I won a season of Total Drama! I can do it again. Good things always happen in two's. Like the second coming and… oh wait, that hasn't happened yet. Well, Owen's second coming is happening right now! Woohoo!"

(Confessional: Trent)

"Season 2? Ugh. Just when I was hoping we could all go back to a normal life. Maybe I'll go home early and start my music career already. That was a joke. I'm gonna win and then become a rock and roll legend."

(Confessional: Gwen)

"I may have skimmed the contracts… Do we really have to do a season 2? Did we sign up for that? Ugh. When is this stupid show over already?"

(Confessional: Beth)

"I am so psyched I got into season 2! Eeeeeh! With Justin.. And Lindsay! This is gonna be the best year ever! Oh, and if you're watching, Zeke's parents, maybe you should enforce twice a day flossing. Not trying to be mean, but I think your son has meningitis.

(Confessional: Justin)

"I was an early boot this season. But next season? I am going right to the top. Heather's a loser now, Lindsay and Beth are all over me, and the rest? They're plain stupid."

(Confessional end)

"Forget it, McLean, we never agreed to a season 2." Gwen states defiantly.

"Actually… you did! It's called the fine print," Chris pulls out the general contract, which is about as thick as a dictionary. "Read it, live it, love it!"

"I hate the fine print." Gwen growls. Chris turns around as Sadie, Katie, Ezekiel, Eva, Noah and Courtney approach him.

"As for the rest of you, your treasure hunt ends here. But don't worry, you'll be able to watch all the action on a new show the network is pitching… from the sidelines!" Chris explains.

"W-wait a minute! I wanna be on season 2!" Courtney yells.

"Tut-tut-tut-tut! Fine print." Chris says.

(Confessional: Courtney)

"Chris is a moron. Is he joking? That's all I need. There's a season 2 and I'm not allowed on it, after all I've been through? Ha, my lawsuit is practically iron clad now. I'll get on that show. Trust me."

(Confessional: Sadie and Katie)

"We're gonna be on season 2!" Sadie exclaims.

"Just to watch, though." Katie corrects.

"That's okay, competing was really hard." Sadie replies.

"Yeah, plus we made so many friends, I don't wanna be in any more drama." Katie adds.

"Aw, me too!" They hug, as usual.

(Confessional: Noah)

"Ugh, whatever. I've got enough problems outside of the show to deal with.. Like how I'm going to clean up Cody's two timing shenanigans. Sorry if you're watching this, Cindy."

(Confessional: Eva)

"Good. I don't wanna be in season 2. Fuck this show, and fuck that host, to death. TO DEATH!"

(Confessional: Ezekiel)

"This show's wack anyways, man.." He sniffles. "Dad? Don't be sad I lost twice, okay? I'll.. I'll figure something out."

(Confessional end)

"In exactly two days, you will all report to a brand new location for a whole new challenge. Take those days to sort out your affairs, get your party on, or otherwise catch up on some Z's. Because next season is going to be so much more…

Total!

Drama!

Action!"

Chris slaps a clapper to close off the special episode.