One day, after watching a Harry Potter film, Peter turned to Loki.
"Mr. Loki, which Hogwarts house are you in?" he asked.
Loki grinned. He knew how much Peter loved these movies. "You tell me, Peter. In fact, why don't you tell me where everyone belongs?"
"Well, that's easy. I've already figured everyone else out. The Hufflepuffs – arguably the best house – are me, Mr. Scott, Miss Pepper, and Mr. Barton. The Ravenclaws are Dr. Banner, Mr. Vision, and Asta. The Gryffindors are Captain Rogers, Mr. Bucky, Mr. Wilson, and Mr. Thor. And the Slytherins are Mr. Stark, Miss Wanda, and Miss Natasha."
"Very well. And where do I fit in this?"
"Well, you're pretty tough. A few people I had tossed around. Mr. Stark could probably fit into Ravenclaw, and Natasha could be a Hufflepuff. Asta could be a Hufflepuff too. You could be a Ravenclaw too, since I know how much you like knowledge. But ultimately, I'd put you in Slytherin. You might be one of the most determined and ambitious people I've met. That's why I put Mr. Stark in there too."
Loki chuckled. "Well then, Peter. It sounds like you have a very extensive and detailed list."
"Oh, I can go further if you want to hear!"
Loki saw the faces around him of those that didn't want to hear it again, and his mischievous streak kicked in.
"I'd love to hear your other theories!" he said with a grin at the collective groans.
Peter sat up a little straighter. He pulled out his phone. "Ok, well, I've compiled a list! The Ravenclaws: MJ, Shuri, Dr. Foster, and her assistant Darcy, Dr. Everhart, and everyone in Mr. Pym's family. Gryffindors: Shaun and Katy, Mr. Rhodey, Drax, T'Challa, his wife Nakia, Wanda's brother Pietro, Star-Lord, Miss Okoye, Agent May and Agent Hill. Slytherins: Yelena, Miss Gamora and Miss Nebula, Rocket, and Mr. Fury. And our Hufflepuffs: Ned, Groot, Mr. Wong, Agent Coulson, and Mantis."
"By the norns, I did not expect such an extensive list. But I must certainly concur with each of your assessments."
Asta smiled at Peter's beaming face. "And Loki is very good at evaluating people as well. So that's high praise indeed."
"Awesome! Well, I gotta get ready to go. Aunt May will be here any minute. Good night, everyone!"
The group all said their good nights and headed to their rooms. Once they got to their room, Loki scooped Asta up and put her gently on their bed.
"Got some ideas tonight, your highness?" she asked with a grin.
He quickly joined her and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "With you in my presence? Always. But I do have one other idea to run past you."
"Oh really?"
"Yes, Tony's ridiculous Halloween party is coming up. I have a possible costume idea."
"I can't believe you're actually suggesting something for it! What's on your mind?"
"Hogwarts students."
"You want to dress up in sweaters and robes?"
"'Want to' is a strong term, but I am willing to, yes."
"Then yes! I think that would be a fabulous idea! My sexy Slytherin."
"My racy Ravenclaw."
Asta raised an eyebrow to that.
"What?" Loki asked. "It was the best I could come up quickly with that included alliteration."
She laughed as she leaned over to kiss him.
Two weeks later, it was time for the party.
"Ok, Mr. Slytherin," Asta said as she fixed her hair. "What do you have for us to wear?"
Loki grinned as he snapped his fingers and was suddenly in the entire Slytherin uniform. Including…
"Is that seriously a Head Boy pin?" Asta asked as she looked closely.
"Naturally," he replied before snapping again and changing her outfit.
"Loki!" she squealed happily. "Did you read my mind? This is exactly how I pictured a Ravenclaw uniform!"
"My love, I will never enter your mind without your permission or a serious emergency! Or those occasions where your thoughts are loud enough for me to hear without trying," he added with an exasperated breath.
"Ok, fair enough. But you even made it blue and bronze, the correct colors! And you made the patch an eagle! I love you so much!" She looked into the mirror. "Oh, and I'm Head Girl as well?"
"Of course. How else will we sneak into each other's dormitories so easily?"
Asta rolled her eyes. It was then that she noticed how short her skirt was. "Ok, you did miss one detail. My skirt is definitely not up to uniform regulation."
Loki covered his mouth playfully as he said, "Oops. I meant that skirt to be for our time after the party." He turned his hand slightly and the skirt lengthened. "Better?"
"It'll do. Alright then, Mr. Laufeyson. We should get down to the party or its 5 points from Slytherin!"
He pulled her close. "Mmm, I guarantee you'll be giving points to my house later tonight."
"And who says you won't be absolutely chanting points to Ravenclaw?" she asked with a wink.
He growled a bit and kissed her passionately. Reluctantly, he pulled back. "Let's go, darling. If we stay here any longer, we won't be attending the party at all."
When they arrived to the common area, Wanda ran over. "Oh my God! You guys look adorable!"
"Look at you!" Asta replied. "Please tell me Vision is Shaggy!"
Wanda smiled and lowered her Velma glasses. "Of course! But it's so weird to see him with hair!" She glanced to the side. "But even weirder is Natasha and Steve in couples costumes!"
Asta spun around and saw Nat and Steve dressed as Chrissy and Eddie from Stranger Things. She squealed quietly. "How cute is that? She has some explaining to do!"
"Right?" Wanda agreed. "Wait til you see everyone else! Thor and Jane aren't here yet, and neither are Bucky and his new girlfriend, but the rest are great!"
Loki laughed when he spotted his in-laws. "Oh, Tony and Pepper look fantastic!"
Asta followed his line of sight and laughed at her parents as Gomez and Morticia Addams. "They really do look great!" She burst into laughter then. "Oh my God, look at Scott and Peter. They're each other!"
"Ah, the Bug Brothers," Loki laughed.
"And please tell me Sam is dressed like Steve in the 40s!" Asta said.
Wanda laughed. "Oh yes, he is! And Bruce insists he's Doc Brown from Back to the Future, but I told him he's Einstein. He's pretty annoyed."
Loki's eyes sparkled. "Oh, I know who I'm going to first then!"
Asta wanted to correct him, but he did suggest and wear matching Harry Potter costumes, so she figured she'd let him have that bit of mischief.
"Is Clint here?" she asked Wanda instead.
"No, he went home to take the kids trick or treating."
"Aw, that's sweet. Do we know what the others are dressing up as?"
"No, but I'm dying to!"
Just then, Bruce came into the room. Loki beamed and kissed Asta on the cheek. "I'll catch up with you in a bit, darling. I've got a new project!"
And he hurried off to call Bruce "Einstein."
"Please be careful and try not to get Hulk-smashed!" she called. "Hard to believe he'll be ruling Asgard someday," Asta added with a pinch to the bridge of her nose.
"Well, he isn't the god of mischief for nothing," Wanda added with a shrug. "Ooh! There's Bucky and his new girl!"
"Isn't that Sam's sister?"
Wanda's eyes widened. "Loki's gonna be sorry he missed this! Let's go!"
As the friends got closer, they found Sarah and Bucky dressed as Sandy and Danny from the end of Grease. But before they could swoon over the cuteness, they saw Sam beginning to yell at Bucky. Bucky was stoic as he took the verbal beating but then Sarah stepped up. They couldn't hear her, but the look on her face and the definitive jabbing at her brother's chest said it all. Finally, Sarah turned and stomped away to the bar, leaving a stunned Sam and Bucky in her wake.
Asta and Wanda met her there.
"Everything ok?" Wanda asked cautiously.
"Yeah, my brother is just being his usual lovely self." She turned to Natasha who was now manning the bar. "Jack and ginger, please, heavy on the Jack."
"That's the only way I make 'em, sweetie," Natasha replied with a wink.
Sarah smiled. "I'm Sarah, by the way, Sam's sister."
Asta nodded. "It's a pleasure to meet you. I'm Asta, this is Wanda and Natasha. And over there is my husband Loki, being chased by Bruce. I'm guessing the taunting about the Doc Brown costume didn't go well."
Loki ran over to them then. "My love! I shall not leave your side for the rest of the party!"
"And is that because you love me, or did Bruce threaten you with bodily harm?"
"Can it not be both?"
Asta rolled her eyes. "You're lucky you're cute, Laufeyson."
Loki kissed her cheek. "I am lucky for a slew of reasons. You are at the top, my darling."
Wanda laughed. "Can you teach Vis to talk to me like that?"
Nat laughed as well and then looked to the elevator. "Hey, speaking of people that Loki annoys!"
Loki's "Hey!" was ignored as everyone turned to see Thor and Jane appear as the now-princely Adam and Belle in her yellow gown.
They wandered to the bar and the girls instantly began to fawn all over Jane's gown.
Loki chuckled as he looked at Thor. "Brother, young Morgan has made me watch enough Disney movies to know that if Jane is wearing that particular dress, then even your scruffy face is too well shaven."
Thor's laugh boomed. "Yes, well, the choice was not mine. Jane presented me with this outfit and told me to wear it. Who am I to argue?"
"Yes, well, that is understandable. Your bride does look beautiful and you certainly are beastly." Loki glanced over and saw Sam approaching. He nudged Asta. "My love, why does Wilson look like he's about to kill Barnes?"
Asta grinned. "Oh, you missed act 1, but it looks like act 2 is about to start. Short version: Bucky brought Sam's sister as his date. This lovely lady here." She gestured to Sarah. "Loki, this is Sarah. Sarah, my husband Loki."
"Charmed," Loki said, gently shaking her hand.
"Delighted," Sarah replied. "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to take my brother down another peg."
For the rest of the evening, the Avengers laughed and drank and watched the tension between Sarah and Bucky and Sam. In the end, everyone got along, thanks to Tony's love of strong alcohol.