037a - How to pick up boys…

Yukari's arms are crossed, a confident smirk on her lips as she stands firm and looks down on the bona-fide hit-squad of skanks that's just joined the action. There are two clearly defined factions facing off on this roof at the moment.

On the one side, there's half a dozen skanks dressed in horribly clashing cosplay fetishwear. There's no common theme, no matching colors, no harmony at all. Heck, it's not even just about their costumes, it's their everything. Make up, hairdo, accessories… They're a steamy pile of shit. Who is their PR agent? How did this fashion disaster pass muster? Their group definitely doesn't spark joy, no ikagai at all.

Then again, what can you expect from a bunch of skanks?

On the other side, there's Yahan, who is more of an infiltration and intelligence agent than a frontline fighter. Then you have the prettiest boy Yukari has seen in her entire life, and that's saying something considering her taste in musical bands. Lastly, there's the last-minute reinforcements in the form of a blonde bombshell with impeccable naming taste and questionable life goals.

That's three against six, with two of the three unwinged and the last one not particularly competent in combat. In other words, they're screwed. Also, Yahan remains hidden, so things look even worse to the outside observer.

As a sweat drop slowly trails down her spine, Yukari ruthlessly suppresses a shiver and makes her smirk grow even wider instead. Just because they're screwed, it doesn't mean they need to broadcast it. In fact, it's at times like this that confidence and force of personality win the day! Act weak when you're strong! Act strong when you're weak! Sun Tzu was into something with that Art of War thing of his!

"Fu, fu, fu… Finally taking me seriously, are you?" She chuckles ominously, slowly walking up to the edge of the bulkhead while uncrossing her arms. "Did you bring enough skanks, though?"

"You bitch!" The blonde twintailed skank who seems to be in charge demands, raising a fist threateningly. "Who the hell do you think you are?"

"You already know, don't you?" She asks with what she hopes is a dangerous voice. "I'm the Sekirei of Darkness."

Yes, they've been caught by superior forces and there's no way they're winning this if it comes to blows. That means it's time for a grand gesture!

Taking inspiration from her favorite manga and american comics, she dramatically jumps down onto the rooftop, trying to make it seem like the maybe seven feet fall is actually something impressive. At least she nails the three-point landing, she knew all that practice would be useful someday. Shame she didn't think to wear a cape today.

"... And, if you want to lay your dirty skank hands on these cuties…" She continues as she slowly stands up and stands walking. "You'll have to get through me."

There's a moment of pregnant silence where everyone remains perfectly still with a mix of confusion and incredulity. Yukari can feel it pressing on her shoulders, a turn of fate, a moment of gravitas, the very edge of an important development. Either her plan is about to pay out or… or things are going to end poorly. For her.

That's when the Alpha Skank starts laughing hysterically.

"Are you… are you trying to intimidate us?" She wheezes incredulously, even as the other skanks join the mockery with chuckles and sneers. "Because that's so hilarious it goes all the way around back to pathetic."

It would hurt if Yukari cared about their opinions but, since she doesn't… this is just a perfect opening for her plan. Not what she was angling for, but something she can definitely work with. As she continues walking forward, she walks right past the cutie patootie pretty boy.

"I'll keep the skanks distracted." She whispers quietly. "Make a break for it as soon as you get a chance."

That's the first half of her plan, to distract the skanks with something shiny -her- so they'll forget about their real target. The second part involves that particularly dark shadow between her and the group of skanks and hoping very hard that means Yahan is there lying in wait and can bail her out as soon as things get dicey.

It's a genius plan, in her very modest opinion. Sure, there's a couple points of failure, but that's unavoidable given the circumstances and she's confident she's making the best out of a poor situation. One could even go as far as to call it foolproof.

As long as nobody makes a fool out of her, of course.

And so, she continues making her way towards the area of suspiciously-dark shadows with a confident swagger, looking for all intents and purposes like she intends to take on the skanks head on. Nobody will know what's actually going through her head until it's too late to do anything about it.

That's, of course, when someone decides to make a fool out of her.

"U– Um…" In spite of the weak, hesitant tone, the voice of the cutie patootie somehow cuts right through the tense mood, making everyone freeze in place. "Please grant me wings and become my Ashikabi!"

Slowly, with a slightly jerky motion, Yukari turns her head around. Yahan made it very clear that a Sekirei would never ask for that lightly, for it's a decision that cannot be taken back. Once a Sekirei is winged, the bond remains for life and will even drag the Sekirei to the grave -or Termination, whatever- if their Ashikabi happens to die first.

Something that would only be asked in the most exceptional of circumstances or… while reacting.

Finally completing the motion, Yukari's eyes land on the pretty boy and she start running a mental checklist. Eyes glazed over? Check. Dilated pupils? Check. Flushed skin, especially cheeks? Check. Sharp breaths? Check.

Well, no two ways about it, he's reacting to her. Which would normally be great, Yukari's heart is definitely big enough for more than one Sekirei and she would always have room for a pretty boy anyway. Her shoujo manga and ecchi harem comedies have mentally prepared her for this much, at least.

But the timing sucks hairy balls! Curse her own overwhelming rizz, this isn't the time to be picking up pretty boys!

"Is that–?"
"Impossible"
"He's reacting to the chuuni brat?"

"Hey!"

But her reflexive protest comes out weak and distracted, because she has better things to occupy her mind with. Like the pretty boy that's making his way towards her. Sky-blue eyes, deep and soulful, full of innocence and devotion are locked into her own. Her dark, shriveled-up heart skips a beat at the thought of such pure emotion being aimed at a perverse wretch like her and—

"For hell's sake, don't just stand around watching!" The Alpha Skank cries out of nowhere, snapping out of her shock in time to actually do something instead of giving them enough time to perform a convenient power up like any good anime villain would. "Stop them!"

Funnily enough, Yukari isn't particularly concerned about the sudden danger she's found herself in. Having failed to reach the spot where she suspects Yahan is waiting in the shadows means her plan has failed and she's now defenseless and vulnerable, but she can't bring herself to care about it right now. Truth is, there's a limit to how much emotion a human being can feel at any given time and she's a bit busy being absolutely livid at the way the skanks utterly ruined the moment.

Many things happen at that moment.

The pretty boy flinches, his trance broken by the sudden development just in time to realize he's made everything worse.

The shadows ripple as Yahan prepares herself to jump into the fray and protect her Ashikabi, hopeless as it might be.

Yukari's body shifts into a combative stance, perfectly aware that she's out of her league but unwilling to simply give up.

And finally, the most important, the blonde bombshell joins the fray by landing in-between Yukari and the pack of skanks while making… is that a ninja hand seal?

"[Mokuton - Aoao Shibari no Jutsu! (Wood Release - Lush and Verdant Binding Technique)]"

An onslaught of (tentacles) creeping vines explodes from the floor and walls of the rooftop, easily making their way through concrete and steel to lunge at the group of skanks. Committed to stopping the winging before it could happen, they can't react in time to the (tentacles) creeping vines coming at them from all directions.

In the blink of an eye, they all find themselves caught and tied up in a series of rather… interesting positions. Yukari has never been particularly interested in bondage, but she's a healthy young woman with a functioning libido and access to the internet, so she knows the basics like everyone else. These bindings look professional.

… Which is almost enough of a shock to stop her natural reaction to the Alpha Skank finding herself suddenly helpless right in front of her. The same Alpha Skank who just ruined a perfect moment after ruthlessly mocking Yukari.

Almost.

"Who are you calling a useless humie who cannot even protect her loved ones and tries to cope by deluding herself into believing her fantasies are real like a sweaty otaku loser, huh!?" Yukari demands as her steel-tipped boot ruthlessly hits the tied-up woman between the legs. The skanks's eyes widen comically as a choked, pitiful noise escapes her lips. Yukari nods in satisfaction. "Yeah, that's what I thought."

Don't let silly stereotypes fool you. A groin shot hurts just as bad for a woman.

"And you…" She continues, turning towards the blonde bombshell that just saved her bacon. "8 out of 10, cool and effective, love the style. But I took away a couple points because the name needs some work."

"Everyone's a critic." The girl grunts, a strained frown marring her pretty features as the other skanks struggle to break out of their bindings. "Now shut up and kiss my brother!"

"Wha–" The pretty boy tries to object.

"Oh, you don't have to ask twice~!" Yukari sing-songs, resting both hands on the pretty boy's shoulders.

"Wha–" The pretty boy tries to object again.

"Itadakimasu!"

She then smashes her lips against the pretty boy's without losing another moment. Because, when a little sister tells you to hurry up and kiss her big brother, shit's as real as it's going to get. Yukari would know, she's a little sister herself and she wouldn't say something like this under torture unless the world literally depended on it. Maybe not even then.

… What's the world ever done for her, really.

The pretty boy's lips… Yukari really needs to see about learning his name, no matter how pretty he is, she can't keep calling him 'cutie patootie' inside her head. Anyway, his lips are very different from Yahan's, but not in a bad way. Yahan's kisses are hot, confident and aggressive and let Yukari know in no uncertain terms that she's riding shotgun. Which is wonderful, and marvelous and Yukari loves them like delicious bitter chocolate.

… But sometimes she's in the mood for being the confident, aggressive one who sits behind the steering wheel, if you catch her meaning. The pretty boys' lips are everything Yahan's aren't. Soft and yielding, shy and hesitant. Sweet and… you know what she means. They leave all the initiative to Yukari, easily falling into a submissive role and needing to be coaxed just to actively participate at all.

The soft glow of pale, ghost-like wings emerging from behind the cutie reminds Yukari of their current circumstances and she reluctantly pulls back. There'll be time to train the pretty boy into the perfect submissive cutie in the future, but right now they have some skanks to take care of.

"Alright, pretty boy." She says while giving the blushing cutie what she hopes is a confident wink "We can leave the rest for when we're actually safe!"

"Shiina." The boy finally introduces himself. "My name's Shiina."

"Sahashi Yukari." She returns the favor, turning her attention towards the still struggling skanks. "How do you like your odds? There's still six of them."

Is that one on the back… getting off being–? No, Yukari's not going to think about that.

"Numbers aren't a problem." Shiina states confidently, approaching the group bound skanks and raising a hand towards them. "As long as Ku-chan keeps them down, I can just… [Death Flower]"

It's hard to explain what happens next. There's some sort of… something that surges from Shiina's hand and expands like a bubble in front of him. Whatever it is, Yukari cannot see it, but she can certainly see its effects upon everything else.

As the bubble of whatever that is expands, everything else gets disintegrated. The vines keeping the skanks in place, their clothes, their weapons… everything but the skanks themselves flakes out and disappears, leaving six naked and unconscious skanks lying on the rooftop.

That might be the (scariest) coolest thing Yukari has seen to date.

"Hmm… 6 out of 10 how did you manage to ruin a death-themed attack?" She comments thoughtfully. "You two are siblings for sure, zero naming sense, I swear."

"Hey!" The blonde bombshell protests, but nobody pays too much attention.

"Are they…" Yukari asks, approaching the closest one to poke at her with her foot. "You know, dead?"

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