"How hard can it be for you to find a baby?" I growled.

The search for my nephew continued, more daunting than ever. Paul suggested we hire a lawyer to help us find him a few months ago. Casey was a nice guy, much kinder to me than I deserved. I had such a short fuse concerning my nephew, and he'd quickly learned how short it was. I knew he was trying hard, and I appreciated his patience despite having so little of it myself."I expected more from a Harvard alum, Casey."

"We've been over this, Seth," he sighed. "What you're asking of me is outside the scope of what a family attorney normally does. Most would hire a PI to find someone, not a lawyer."

I shrugged. "I'll need you once I find him, right?"

"You will," Paul agreed. "That's why you should mind your manners and stop being hateful to the man. Quit riding the guy's ass so hard, Seth."

Casey and Paul got along famously. I wasn't surprised he'd put me in my place for Casey. I didn't mind. It was always nice that Paul could keep his cool since I frequently couldn't. Paul could be a dick, but his behavior depended on circumstances and the people involved, whereas I rarely needed those excuses to warrant my temper anymore.

The opposite was once true, but the previous year had somehow swapped my and Paul's outlooks. Now, he was the more rational one, the proverbial 'dependable brother' while I'd become the angry orphan with a strained imprint. It was ironic and would be amusing were it not so fucking painful.

Casey bit back a grin. Meeting my eyes again, he said, "I promise you, Seth, the moment I find something I'll call you. I have hired an extra paralegal to help me with your case specifically."

That was one thing I truly liked about Casey. He looked a man in the eye when he talked to him. No bullshit, no greasy placating expression like many attorneys plastered on their faces like masks while they took your money but still told you to kick rocks. Casey truly seemed a man of his word; he meant what he said.

I snorted out a bitter laugh. "Probably paid you enough to cover their salary, huh?"

I knew I had to be driving Casey and Ash mad by hounding him like I did. Casey was a good man, but a busy one. I was far from his only client, and my obsession with finding my nephew frequently wasted precious time. He'd told me after the fifth day I'd called in a row he'd start billing me if I didn't stop. My parents had left a decent amount of money behind, and what better way for me to spend it than looking for their grandson?

Paul told me I had, "done lost your fucking mind for wasting what they'd worked so hard for making phone calls to learn nothing new." He nagged me about how those extra charges were hindering, not helpful, but impatience needled my mind like a parasite. It was far more annoying than his nagging, so I called anyway.

Casey said, "You've got Ash's number, and mine."

Paul muttered, "Probably both on speed dial right after my number…" I smirked at Paul and flipped him the bird because he was right.

Casey laughed. "I promise you, Seth. You'll know the minute we hear something."

Despite not finding anything so far, he didn't seem pessimistic. Casey and his assistant Ashley were as determined as I was to locate my nephew. He'd told me as much the day I'd hired him. I could tell by their devotion to my cause that it meant something more to them, something personal, though I didn't ask why. If I hired a P.I., finding out what made them care so passionately about reuniting families would be tempting. I wouldn't, though. I didn't need to know the details of their personal lives, only how they could help me bring my nephew back to La Push.

He continued, "Surely you can understand how difficult it is to find a nameless baby who disappeared during a cyberattack on a tiny regional hospital." He sighed and shook his head after hearing my story for the first time. I felt my hope fading.

Trying to mask my disappointment, I asked, "So, does that mean you can't help me?"

That's what the first ten lawyers I'd consulted told me. One of them even had the gall to laugh over the complex circumstances. Paul's heavy hand on my shoulder, the menace in his voice as he glared at the pompous ass, and the stark reminder that Charlie couldn't get me out of an assault on a lawyer probably saved the man's life. Seth had never watched a man turn from proud to pissing himself so fast.

Ash smiled and placed her hand on my shoulder, gently unlike the hold Paul had held on me that day. "No, Seth. You've come to the right place." Her tone was so kind, so calming. Like Bella's used to be. I'm sure the relief was clear in my smile and Ash gave me an affectionate pat before dropping her hand. "My goodness, you're so warm."

Paul and I both chuckled. We were long used to that reaction.

Surprisingly, Casey enjoyed our company so much that he'd schedule us just before his lunch break, and the four of us would eat together afterward. Paul was paying today, and there was a new place he wanted to try down the street from Casey's office. It was close enough, and we could walk. Besides, it was nice outside today.

Ashley walked beside me while Paul told Casey about a call they'd been out on. Casey's dad was a fire captain, and he worked as a dispatcher in the summers during college, which meant they could relate to each other. Ashley wasn't quite the open book that her boss was. She rarely engaged in small talk with either of us. Thankfully for her, she was off limits to Paul, even if someone like Ash could do him a world of good.

I couldn't help but dislike the women he slept with. Some could have been nice, but they'd never be Leah. Before Bella, I was unsure how anything could simultaneously bring him solace and hurt him deeply. Now, I got it. I liked Ash, though.

Sounding small, she whispered, "Can I ask you something?".

I chuckled a little. It was like she heard me thinking about how closed off she was. "Of course."

"He loved her, right? Your sister?" She was looking at Paul. "He fascinates me. Not romantically, just how he acts. I was a psychology minor. He's not just putting on a brave face for you. It's like… he's in pain, but when you need him he turns it off. Your needs and pain take precedence over whatever he's feeling at the moment. I've seen nothing like it."

I took a moment to consider it, and it made perfect sense. It was his way with Leah, too. Paul took the same unconditional love he'd had for Leah and put it into me in a fatherly, or older-brother way. And I was grateful to have him. Paul was, undoubtedly, the best friend I'd ever had. I just wish that relationship had developed under better circumstances.

It was nice for someone to talk to me about Paul without trying to use me to get close to him. Everyone I was close to either loved Paul or couldn't stand him with no middle ground, and any girls who asked me about him just wanted to get in his pants. It was exhausting. If being betrayed by your imprint wasn't enough to make you distrust most women, being abandoned by others and used by the rest certainly did. The funny thing was the people I felt closest to in life had all been women besides my dad. Until Paul, that is.

"He did." I finally answered. "Leah was the love of his life."

She looked puzzled. "But the baby isn't his? She was engaged to someone else?"

My wolf stirred at the mention of Sam. I tried to breathe slowly and calm myself down. Ash noticed the change in my behavior and flinched.

"I'm sorry," she muttered. "I know about the fiance. He gave up the baby. Sore subject."

"It's okay. I loved Sam when I was younger. He's changed a lot since she died… Turned… I don't know. Spiteful? He met someone new the same week Leah died and moved her right in. Then he gave up rights to my nephew. We all got into a huge argument."

That was the understatement of the year.

"To put the cherry on top, he mocked Paul's pain to his face," I added, reminding myself to stay calm. Just thinking about it, Paul's face that day still infuriated me.

Ash gasped and covered her mouth apologetically as I took a calming breath. Lowering her hand to her chest, she said, "I'm sorry for my reaction, but…That would be hard to forgive."

"It is. And I never will."

Nearly a whisper, she said, "He didn't deserve any of you."

I knew she'd get it, further validating my relief she was on our side. I stopped walking as something Casey said earlier finally struck me.

"Wait, Ash, will you not be on my case anymore? Casey said he hired another paralegal."

Ashley rolled her eyes and smirked, but her tone remained kind. "You're as assuming as you are stubborn, you know that? I told Casey he'd have to fire me to get me off your case. The temp is going to help with everything else I do. I think he just said that to make you feel bad about calling so much. We've needed the help for a long time. You do call too much, though. It's you he's worried about, not us."

I was relieved that she'd still be helping us. We made it to the restaurant and sat together in a booth tucked in the back corner where Paul and Casey already waited. Ash sat by the wall and I slid in next to her, across from Paul. We frequently sat like this. She and Casey were barely visible with Paul and I blocking them in, which was their preference.

There was no rule against them having lunch with clients, but there was a certain level of favoritism shown to Paul and me that Casey's firm wouldn't particularly encourage. We were at a new sushi place, and there wasn't a good chance of us running into someone. Paul and Ash both raved about how good it was supposed to be. It wasn't my thing, so I let Paul order for me and picked my napkin mindlessly.

Paul continued to talk about his fire calls and Casey shared some war stories of his own. Ash and I had done nothing adventurous like that, so we listened intently. It was like our very own episode of a first responder TV show, but scarier because we knew these stories were true. Paul never mentioned a car accident since he knew it would trigger me, but Casey didn't hold back. He told us the good, bad, and ugly of being a dispatcher. Charlie had been pestering women of the pack to work dispatch for him and Casey's stories made it sound intriguing. I planned to share what I heard with them when we got back. They didn't all have thousands of dollars from dead parents, after all.

I had to admit; that I liked sushi. I wouldn't order it by myself, but whatever Paul had ordered for me wasn't bad. Casey didn't seem to like it, though. He'd been pushing his food around his plate for the last twenty minutes. Ash convinced him to try some of hers, and he seemed to perk up a bit.

It was bittersweet to see how the two of them acted together. They weren't even together and had no magical force like imprinting at play, yet they were more comfortable together than Bella and I had been in the last year.

While I hated to admit it, I'm unsure I'd have survived the first few days after the accident without Bella to anchor me. I missed her. Before my family died, she was such a prominent figure in my life. Moments like this one between Casey and Ash made me wish we had a normal relationship. We could be happy, even as friends, if we'd let ourselves. After everything that happened between us, she may not even want me. I couldn't blame her if she didn't.

My thoughts went silent and my fork fell from my hand when a gentle breeze passed through the open windows of the restaurant. Paul's head shot up warily as the scent of a leech hit us with full force. Not just any leech, a Cullen. It was too familiar to miss. I stood up before I realized what I was doing and Paul glanced toward Case and Ash before glaring daggers at me.

I turned my head in every direction around the restaurant until I saw a large man standing in front of a girl with golden blonde hair. The man wasn't Emmett, but I knew the girl was Rosalie. She had to be.

"Rosalie," I whispered. I knew she'd hear me. When she didn't turn, I raised my voice. "Rosalie. Rosalie!" I was now yelling as I moved toward her in the crowded restaurant.

"Rosalie Hale?" Ash whispered. "The nurse who was last seen with the baby, but disappeared?"

Casey sighed. "Oh, I hope Seth doesn't do something stupid."

"He won't, it's not Rosalie," Paul muttered. "It can't be."

Paul was right. As I got closer, I realized the woman wasn't Rosalie. She smelled and looked similar to her, though, and with the same golden eyes. Had the Cullens added someone to their coven? Were there other covens that believed in Carlisle's way of life? I watched recognition flicker across her face as she realized I wasn't precisely human either. She briefly met my eyes before fleeing the restaurant.

Who the hell was that? I was too dumbfounded to move from the spot I stood in, too stunned to speak. Having hope for a moment just to have it snatched away from me again was a type of torture I knew too well.

As the vampire's scent lingered, I could've even sworn I smelled Leah, but that was impossible. I rejoined the others at our table and nobody said a word about Rosalie or what had happened, but it was all I could think about.

I was grateful for Paul; he carried the conversation through the rest of our lunch and on the walk back to Casey's office. Casey and Ash didn't mention my outburst. It was embarrassing, how confident I'd been that I'd found Rosalie.

"Are you okay?" Paul asked as we climbed into Leah's car.

I nodded. "It just felt so real for a second. I thought we'd found her. She smelled like a Cullen, and had golden eyes like them, too. The height, hair, and figure… I mean, they could have been sisters, Paul."

"Finding Rosalie isn't a magical key to finding the kid, you know. I already grilled the Cullen's about the night he disappeared. She and Carlisle were home when he got taken."

I knew that, but I still thought it would bring me closure to hear it from her. He knew that, too, so I didn't bother saying it. I couldn't pretend I hadn't hoped he was with her this whole time, even if I knew definitively that he wasn't.

After a few minutes of peaceful silence, Paul asked, "When were you going to tell me you moved Bella into the house?"

Man, that news had traveled fast. Bella had only moved in last night. I stayed with her until she fell asleep. When Kim came home, I snuck out without waking her. I hadn't spoken to her today, nor did I intend to.

I smiled at him. "Don't you mean 'leech lover'? You haven't called her Bella in over a year."

I didn't get a snarky response, or any response at all. Paul gripped the steering wheel so hard his hands turned white and let out a long sigh.

"Let me ask you something. Do you ever see them? You know, in your dreams? Harry, Sue?" He paused for a moment. "Or, Leah.."

Billy Black swore he saw his wife every night in his dreams. He didn't just dream of her; it was her he saw. He told us the spirits would visit us that way. I didn't sleep enough to get the pleasure. My sleep was plagued with nightmares, and seeing them only made my pain worse.

"Do you?" I asked.

He sighed again, only this time I realized he was trying to keep his breathing even, as if he was trying not to sob. "Sue, every single night. Harry, most nights. Hell, I've seen Sarah fucking Black. Never Leah, though."

Leah not 'visiting' Paul disproved Billy's theory for me. I didn't tell Paul that. He believed it with his whole heart. It was too painful to imagine Leah not being in the same 'place' as Mom or Dad. Was she not able to visit him? There wasn't a reality where Leah could see Paul, even just in his dreams, and chose not to. She'd want to comfort him as best she could. She'd want the same for me.

"Sue was mad at me last night." He told me. "She told me I'm doing a good job protecting you, but almost too good of a job. I promised her I'd take it easier on the leech lov-. Bella."

Paul's dream version of my Mom had Bella's best interest in mind, at least. I wasn't ready to forgive her, or even have a deep conversation with her, but I needed Paul on board if we had any chance at fixing our relationship. He was as important to me as she was.

"You should've seen her yesterday. She wasn't anything like the Bella we know." I shuddered at the memory of how bad she looked. "Leah would be so mad at us if she was here."

"I know," Paul admitted. "None of this would happen if Leah was here, though. Bella wouldn't have gone to Sam. You would've told her about the imprint by now, or Leah would've done it for you."

"But, you wouldn't hate her, either. I know you loved Bella before they died, as much as you're capable, anyway. You called her leech lover, but you were always just joking. You only ever snapped at her when you were defending Leah, like that day at the beach."

Paul was a complicated man, but even after Bella found out about us he didn't hate her. Even though she stayed with Edward. She was important to me and Leah, and he wasn't immune to her charm, either. He'd tease her and sometimes he was an ass, but he didn't hate her back then.

I realized then that the closer Leah's wedding came, the more bitter about Bella's choices Paul seemed. It made a little more sense, now. I wished Paul would see fake Leah in his dreams. Maybe he'd stop sleeping his way through Port Angeles if she asked him to. Maybe he'd be kind to Bella.

Thinking about the night Edward left her made me sick. It never would've happened that way if Leah were here, alive or in Paul's dreams. Bella was my imprint and Paul was my brother. We should've supported her more than we had. Bella should've been with me on my search for my nephew, no matter the capacity.

We pulled into our driveway a few hours later and Paul didn't get out of the car. I waited for him. He seemed like he had something to say.

"Seth, listen.." he sighed. "I love you. Even before imprinting, before I fell in love with Leah romantically, the Clearwaters have been my family. I loved Bella, too. It's hard not to sometimes…"

I nodded, understanding precisely what he meant. There was just something about Bella that was so endearing that it was difficult to dislike her, even with good reason.

"But Seth…" Paul continued, "You just got to a point where you can function again without every errant comment making you turn people into punching bags. I can't forget you coming home in Charlie's car covered in blood, or the days on end that you didn't leave your room. I can't forget the breakdowns when you tried to get in the car..."

I looked away, out the windshield, hating that my pain affected him so profoundly because he understood me better than I'd ever truly realized.

His tone softened somewhat. "One thing I will not do is watch you go through that shit again. We've seen what imprinting did to Sam. He's not our brother anymore! I can't lose you, Seth, or watch you lose yourself. And I cannot watch Bella hurt you again. You had to grieve for her when you should've only been grieving for your family… The rest of us are still grieving for you too. The old Seth is as dead and gone as they are. Bella was a part of that destruction, and I can't forgive her for that."

I said nothing. He didn't seem finished, but even if he was, I wasn't sure what to say. I'd never realized how much the changes in me had affected Paul. He was there for me through all of it, and I, only at that moment, realized I didn't return his support. All I seemed to do from Paul was take away what little peace we got. I was just something else for him to worry about.

"I promised Mom, Sue, that I'd be more patient with Bella. I'm making the same promise to you. I'll watch my mouth. If she needs something, I'll do it and try to be polite about it, but I need you to promise me something in return."

There was nothing I wouldn't do for Paul. "Anything."

"Promise me you won't rush into anything with her. I have to know you're not just a rebound for her. I need her to show me, and show you, that she's not using you to get over the leech. Wait until she heals a bit before you agree to anything. Then you'll know it's real. If Bella can improve your life somehow, I'll welcome it… but she's got a lot to prove first."

That was a promise I could keep. I felt conflicted about Bella, but I was far from ready to give my heart to her. She'd already handed it back to me in pieces once.

I left after giving Paul my assurances that I'd take things slow. Still, with Bella on my mind, I ran straight to my parent's house and slept underneath her open window.