Chapter 195: Darkhaven Secrets.

"If you've come back with more of your silly prepositions, I won't hear it."

-Yessica-N, Forsight

Campion had a great and restful night. The secret burrow the Speaker had shown him was the perfect spot to sleep undisturbed. It had been the best sleep he had had in seasons; in the morning, he felt refreshed. This would be his new burrow; he could not see himself going back to anything else.

He went above ground to search for the others; the first rabbit he stumbled upon was Aspen.

It felt like it had been a long time since their last encounter, Campion had missed him, it would be nice to catch up. Judging by Aspen's reaction, the feeling appeared mutual:

-"So good to see you again, Campion!"

-"Good to see you too," Campion said with a smile. "So, what have you been up to lately?"

-"Not much. I've been taking part in training with the rest of the owsla...I hate to say this, but I'm not enjoying it."

-"What is the problem?" Campion asked in concern.

-"The Black Rabbit of Inlé sent me back here to protect you. With all this time I spend training, I am unable to do anything for you."

-"The Black Rabbit may have overstated the need for my protection. Seriously, the past few days, I've been doing fine, I've had no trouble staying alive."

-"But...if I am no longer needed, what's stopping the Black Rabbit from taking me back?"

-"In that case, I could perhaps be the one to protect YOU instead."

-"Protect me from Inlé himself? I appreciate the intention, but you wouldn't stand a chance. Even El-ahrairah himself was unable to trick the Black Rabbit in the old story."

-"I'll risk it. I would do anything to protect my friends." And that included the Watershippers, Campion thought, but since Aspen was unaware of his double-agent status, he did not mention that last detail.

Aspen still appeared worried, but did not press the issue.

-"Not being able to protect you is not the only reason why I don't like the training," he suddenly admitted. "I also have major questions about this war."

-"What sort of questions?"

-"Is all this violence really the answer? Us rabbits already have enough enemies as is, why are we fighting each other? Shouldn't we try to make peace with the outsiders instead?"

Campion was both amazed and surprised by what he heard: this was the first time Aspen appeared to waver in his loyalty towards Woundwort. Perhaps they could work together against the General. Campion would have to nurture Aspen's doubts, while being careful not to take things too quickly, or the pale rabbit might panic and tell Woundwort everything.

-"I can see your point, but Woundwort would be furious if he heard that. Don't worry, I won't tell him. For now, just keep doing what he asks of you, and we'll figure out a solution soon."

As Campion noticed another rabbit in the distance, he remembered something else he had wanted to talk to Aspen about.

-"I've been meaning to ask...what do you make of the newcomer, Kurai?"

-"I've been talking to him for a bit. He's easily the nicest rabbit in this warren! Er, I mean, second nicest, after you, of course."

-"I'm not offended," Campion said with a chuckle. "But isn't there anything that strikes you as odd about him?"

-"I haven't noticed anything. I doubt he'll be staying that nice and friendly much longer, though, the foul mood in this place is likely to rub off on him."

Campion was left unsurprised by what Aspen told him: Kurai had his way of befriending everyone. He still remained convinced that the newcomer was hiding something, even if everyone else was too blinded by his charms to notice; he would have to investigate on his own.

Woundwort had not experienced as pleasant a night as Campion did. The nonsense with Lady May had left him exhausted; it was even worse than after a battle. He usually managed to survive with only a few hours of sleep every night, but not this time; he slept much longer than expected. When he woke up and saw the sun shining just outside his burrow, the first thing he felt was annoyance for having overslept. He was also furious that nobody had woken him up (despite the fact that he hadn't actually asked anyone to do so).

As he went above ground, he was further annoyed to see so many rabbits spread across the pit. In Efrafa, he was always the first to get up in the morning and the last to go to sleep at night (except for the guards on night duty); to wake up so late and find that almost everyone else was already up and about was humiliating. Some of the others were at silflay, others appeared to be napping, others were...playing? Woundwort could not understand how these adult rabbits could be wasting their time on something so pointless, they were not kittens anymore.

-"Why are you lot lazing about?" he shouted. "Get back to digging!"

The rabbits were startled by the sudden appearance of their leader; they hurriedly complied with his orders, rushing to the tunnels and starting to dig. Woundwort only kept an eye on them for a few minutes, to make sure they were taking the situation seriously and didn't intend to stop as soon as he stopped looking. Once he was pleased, he hopped away, to go speak to Lady May; he had something very important to discuss with her.

After searching far and wide for the doe, he eventually found her in the flayrah storage chamber. She was lying on top of a pile of half-eaten carrots, chewing merrily.

-"Hey there," she said, only briefly glancing at him, because she still found him ugly. "Have you come to apologize for last night?"

-"I have nothing to apologize for," Woundwort said, hardly believing his ears.

-"Ugh, I should never have brought this up. You're clearly not the type of rabbit who would apologize for anything."

Indeed, Woundwort had never apologized in his life, because he had never never done anything wrong (or, at least, that's what he thought). Not even when he had believed Campion was a traitor; the whole misunderstanding was Vervain's fault.

-"Never mind last night. You should be the one apologizing: that flayrah you're eating is reserved for the Chief only."

-"Nobody told me about that rule," Lady May pointed out. "Besides, I'm a queen, remember? I deserve the best flayrah."

-"Could you at least have the decency to finish what you start? You're just nibbling a few pieces of each carrot, leaving the rest."

-"I know. The thing is, I start eating the carrot, it tastes great, then suddenly, before I'm finished, a worm crawls onto it! That's just gross, I can't eat something that had a worm on it! So I move to another worm-free vegetable instead."

Woundwort had never heard anything so ridiculous. Clearly living in the hutch had left Lady May with impossibly high standards.

-"What you're eating is a root, it grows underground," he explained. "It has no doubt been touched by countless worms when you weren't looking."

-"Huh, I hadn't thought of that..." As her eyes went wide, Lady May spat out the piece of carrot she had in her mouth. "Where can I find a river?"

-"Why?"

-"When I was still living in the hutch, the human carefully washed all my vegetables with water and the substance they call 'soap'. Obviously, living in the wilderness, I don't have access to soap, so I'll have to settle for the next best thing: rinsing the vegetables in the river to remove the dirt and the slimy residue."

It seemed that with every additional comment, Lady May was further losing touch with reality.

-"Considering how much you ate, I'll have to send the owsla on a raid today to restock our supplies. And I will ask them to rinse the flayrah in the river before bringing it back here." Woundwort's last statement was a lie: there was no way he would have his owsla waste their time to indulge a delusional rabbit's fantasies. All that mattered was she believed that the flayrah was rinsed; this would hopefully put an end to her complaints, and she would never be able to tell the difference between rinsed and un-rinsed vegetables anyway.

-"Oh, would you?" A rare smile appeared on Lady May's face. "That would be so kind of you, greatly appreciated, nice way to earn forgiveness for your behaviour last night."

-"There's one thing you need to understand. Being a queen provides many privileges, but also great responsibilities. As soon as the outsiders are taken care of, we'll have to make plans for the next generation."

-"The...next...generation?" Lady May said nervously; hopefully Woundwort wasn't suggesting what she thought he was.

-"We will have kittens together. They will carry on my glorious legacy."

Lady May cringed. She remained deeply disturbed at the thought of mating with such an ugly rabbit and having kittens with him. But, like he had said, being a queen brought great responsibilities, as much as she dreaded it. Unless she came up with an alternative...

-"So, how's it going with the outsiders?" she asked, hoping to get an estimate of how much time she had left to think of a way out.

-"They will be destroyed soon," Woundwort proudly announced.

-"How soon?"

-"As soon as I discover their warren's location. Then, I will smash them into obliv..."

Woundwort stopped mid-word, as he heard shouting coming from above ground. As he went out of the chamber, he saw everyone run out of the tunnel they were supposed to be digging.

-"What is going on around here? Why aren't you working?"

-"I think we broke a pipe," Granite replied. "There's water leaking everywhere."

Woundwort, not believing the large white rabbit, ran into the tunnel. Halfway through, his face was covered with water, sprinkling from a pipe the rabbits had made a hole in while digging. This confirmed what Granite had told him; he ran back out of the tunnel, and looked at the crowd.

-"You were right. Digging will have to stop. Now fill it up."

-"Fill it up?" Granite's ears drooped to the sides of his head. "We spent all day yesterday digging this tunnel, and now we have to fill it up again? My claws are starting to hurt."

-"It's not my fault the humans were stupid enough to put a pipe in there! And if your claws hurt after so little digging, then you need the exercise! Now..."

-"But it is your fault," came a third voice. "You should have listened to my warnings."

Woundwort turned to look at the rabbit who had criticized him; it was the Speaker of the Past. She had adjusted her skull so that it completely hid her face, apart from the two empty eye sockets, which revealed her own eyes. Everyone who was present, even Woundwort himself, was slightly creeped out by this.

-"What did you say just now?" he said.

-"I told you that digging such a tunnel would cause more problems than it would solve, but you did not listen to me, you just went ahead with the digging anyway."

-"You never told me that!"

-"You are correct, I did not. But even if I had told you, you would not have listened to me."

Woundwort was furious at the Speaker's accusations, especially since they didn't make any sense. He cuffed her across the face; however, in his anger, he had momentarily overlooked the skull she had on her head, and only managed to hurt his own claws. Captain Orchis saw this situation as the perfect opportunity to try out his new method of torture: not only had the perfect victim just turned up, but this would also hopefully get the General to calm down, sparing everyone a lengthy rant.

-"General Woundwort sir, would you now be interested in my demonstration of a revolutionary new method of torture?"

-"Of course I would. Perhaps we could test it on this arrogant doe here," the General replied, pointing to the Speaker.

-"Brilliant idea, General!"