The panda went to his master the next morning. "Master Shifu? Can I try some other meditation? What about the walking meditation?"
The red panda's eyebrow rose. He sighed and sat down on his mat, motioning Po to sit down. "Now, tell me what's really bothering you. I wouldn't imagine that these... thoughts would cause such a distress to you. What are they about?"
"I told you. They're... you know-"
"Sexual?"
"Yes."
"About who?"
"That doesn't matter!" Po quickly said.
The red panda nodded. "Either way, Po, you're not going to conquer these thoughts by staying away from them or changing up the meditation. The meditation only shows you what your mind thinks of throughout the day." Shifu rubbed his goatee. "Would you say that you... repress some of these thoughts?"
"Well... not always. But usually when I'm around people, I try my best not to think about them. But it's like... when I meditate they're not just thoughts, they're stories, visions, fantasies. Sometimes, I feel like they're actually happening."
"Hmm, you must be going deep into meditation."
"But why are they always about... intimacy?"
The red panda tilted his head. "Po, are you afraid of sex?"
"What?! No, what makes you say that?"
"It's just... you keep hesitating. You even refuse to name the things as they are."
"It's just... I don't know. I didn't think I would talk about this stuff with you or anyone. I don't want people to think that I'm some rude pervert."
Shifu smiled, "I can assure you that all of us have these thoughts one time or another. Only a select few don't have them. Either way, they don't define the kind of person you are. Thoughts are simply thoughts. They only lead to behaviors if you're not aware of them."
Po bowed his head, frowning. "But... I don't know... is all this fantasizing right?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, even if I were just... daydreaming about this stuff it doesn't feel like I should... do it."
"Fantasizing doesn't mean you have to do anything, Po."
"Yeah, but there's so much that people fantasize about. I fantasized about being a Kung Fu warrior. The others fantasized about being the Dragon Warrior. You fantasized about what training the Dragon Warrior would be like and..."
"And what?" Shifu prodded on.
The large panda sighed. "It's like...when it comes to real life, our fancy dreams aren't as awesome as we dreamed about. I don't know. Is it okay to fantasize? Especially when you want to change things that can't be changed? And when you can make your dreams real, is it going to be worth it?"
Shifu stood silent before the panda. He quirked his head to the side while he rubbed his chin. "I don't know. In my experience, it is useless to try and never have expectations because they arise the same way thoughts arise. I would have to say," He said after a long pause, "that you have to always remember that fantasy is not always reality and reality is not always fantasy. Do not cling so tightly to your fantasy that you fail to see the reality in front of you."
Po sighed but smiled, "Thank you, Master Shifu."
"I can tell that my advice didn't help you in the way you expected. What do you take it to mean?"
"Your advice?" Shifu nodded. Po shrugged, "I guess what you said was... don't get so caught up in your dreams that you're not willing to live out life. I guess having the fantasy is different than doing it."
"Much like writing a story is much more difficult than thinking about the story," Shifu finished and walked towards the door.
"But... which is better? Make-believe or reality?"
The red panda smiled and looked behind him at the bear. "I think you already know that." He left the large panda alone to his thoughts. Po stood up and walked over to the barracks where the others were eating and having breakfast.
"Hey, Po, what's wrong?" Monkey asked.
"Huh? Nothing. Just thinking about something."
"What's that?"
"It's nothing, I promise. I'm going to go meditate."
The room got silent and every eye fell on Po. The panda scanned the room. "What?"
"Uhhh well it's just... uh... Tigress told us that you were having a tough time with meditation," Crane said. Po locked eyes with Tigress who only nodded. The panda huffed. "We're just surprised that you would go back at it."
"Like Shifu said, it takes time. Maybe I can get better after I break through... whatever it is I'm doing-"
"NO!" The entire room shouted. Po stumbled back. Their concerned faces drew a confused hum from his lips.
"I don't get it."
"Po," Tigress spoke, "A lot of people meditate thinking that they'll break through something. That's a sure way of hurting yourself. Please don't try to push yourself. It's okay to take a break. You don't have to figure it out all at once."
Po sighed, "I guess. Anyway, I'm going to go out for a bit." The panda walked away from the barracks and let his feet take him around the winding steps of the Jade Palace. He had an empty lost stare, only mildly focused on his path, enough to make sure he didn't miss a step.
His mind was a bit calmer after he took care of business, but he noticed a sadness in his heart. "Why are you there?" He asked his sadness.
Because of a realization. If he did manage to get rid of or dispel these urges, part of him feared that he wouldn't be able to feel pleasure like this at all. What was the point of getting rid of the sexy thoughts if it meant getting rid of the pleasure? He knew there were other pleasures to be had: eating, socializing, kicking butt, Kung Fu. But he also knew a secret part of him wanted to keep this. He just didn't realize how much he had been holding it back as a secret.
"Po? Are you okay?"
"Huh?" Po looked around him and noticed he was in his father's noodle shop. Did he walk all the way down without noticing? "Uhhh yeah, dad. I'm okay."
"You sure, you look hungry," Mr. Ping said.
The panda smiled, "I'll be fine." He turned to the entrance and saw a familiar set of stripes trek in. "Tigress, what are you doing here?"
"To make sure you're okay. You seem... distracted."
"I'm fine. Really I am."
"You're worried about the meditation?" Tigress guessed. The panda nodded. She motioned the panda away from the noisy shop and onto one of the village's private alleyways. The feline sighed and rested her back against the wall, crossing her arms. "So... what's wrong?"
"It's... private. Like personal private."
"Anything that clouds a warrior's mind is-"
"It's about intimate stuff, okay?" Po cried out. "I'm just... trying to get my mind off this stuff."
"But it happens almost every time you meditate?" Tigress asked. The panda nodded. "Is that why you were having such a problem with meditating earlier?"
"Yeah."
"And the-"
"Yes, yes, that's why I got the towel. Now could you stop saying it so loud," Po hissed.
The tiger sighed, "Po, it is-"
"Natural for people to have these thoughts, I know, but it feels like I have to give up fantasizing in general."
"What?"
"I... I talked with Shifu and I'm starting to think it's bad to daydream or fantasize. What's the point of it if it's just to escape reality or make lousy expectations about the real world?"
"What if they're simply ideas?"
"What?"
"Not all of your ideas come to reality," She explained, "They take work. In the same way, realizing the line between what you expect and what is actually happening is important. It might seem and feel as if your thoughts dominate your actions, but that's not the case."
Po shivered at the word dominate. Tigress looked at him, concerned. "I'm fine," He said. "Just... weird memory."
"But what do you think?"
The panda shrugged, "I'm starting to think that fantasizing is just what we do. What's dangerous is to force our expectations and dreams onto real people. Or to always use them as an escape from reality. We shouldn't use them to escape life, no matter how painful it is," Po frowned, staring at the ground.
Tigress lowered herself to catch his line of sight. "Are you talking from experience?" Po nodded. "What did you do about it?"
"I became the Dragon Warrior," The panda smiled.
The tiger smiled back. "I think you're on the right path, Po. Not falling in love with your fantasies is very mature and wise. You can either work to make ideas a reality, or simply let them be what they are: ideas."
Then her smile turned into a half-smirk while her left eyebrow rose. "Though I am curious what kind of fantasies you have that could've caused this."
"Nope!"
"Why not?" Tigress chuckled as the panda briskly walked out of the alley.
"Waaaaayyy too embarrassing," Po stuttered.
"Oh! It's those kinds of fantasies."
"Tigress!" Po whined. The tiger laughed and walked back with Po into the shop. Later, the others joined and the Furious Five and Po chatted. The panda felt an easy smile rest on his face. Eating and drinking with his friends, he could see Monkey laughing at Mantis' big gestures as he told a story. Crane nervously glancing between Viper and Mantis because the story was about him. Viper carrying a giggling smile while the tiger held a small warm charming smile. Her gaze would turn to Po with a small questioning dip in her lips. The panda would smile wider and nod, reassuring the tiger.
This was reality. Nice, quiet, peaceful, fun. He felt glad to be in this moment with them.
Later on that week, Po sat down and meditated early in the morning. Taking a deep breath, he made sure that Tigress wasn't around this time. He focused on his breath and nothing else. Surprisingly, he didn't move or do anything else until he heard someone coming up behind him. "Hello?" He called out.
"Po, aren't you hungry?"
"What do you mean?" Po asked, turning his head to face Tigress. She had a plate of spicy dumplings that he said he wanted to try. He looked up and his eyes shot open. "WHOA! It's noon already!?"
"Not noon, but close to lunch."
"Huh, now wonder I was hungry," Po chuckled as Tigress sat down next to him in the grassy earth overlooking the valley with the Peachtree overhead. Po happily ate the food with a stuffed smile that Tigress couldn't help but grin at.
"I see you're getting better at meditating. You don't seem to have issues with it anymore."
"I still have some stuff here and there," Po replied. "But I'm not having any trouble with my... urges or stuff."
Tigress tilted her head. "Urges?"
"Yeeaaahhhh. It's nothing really."
"It must be something if it was causing you such distress. I still remember what you went through when you were first trying it out with me."
Po sighed, "I was just... having some inappropriate thoughts, that's all."
"What were they like?"
"Nope."
"Huh?"
"I'm not telling you what my fantasies were like," Po firmly said.
Tigress took a beat to process what he said. She squinted her eyes. "A week ago you were talking about fantasies. Is that what's been plaguing your mind."
"Yeah," Po said, shame dripping out his mouth.
"It's nothing to be afraid or ashamed of Po."
"Yeah, but these were... uh-"
"Sexual?"
"Yes! Yeah, they were that."
Tigress narrowed her eyes again. "And you went to Master Shifu about this and not me?"
"I... I didn't want you to think I was a pervert."
"Are they fantasies that you like?"
"WHAT?!" Po snapped his head around and glared at her. "What are you talking about?"
"Are they fantasies that you like?"
"Ahh... I... they're just fantasies. And they're just stuff that would never happen in real life," Po shook his head. "Why are you so interested in this?"
Tigress smirked, "Figuring out what goes on in your mind when you make... intriguing decisions has always been a private desire of mine."
Po rolled his eyes. "Besides that."
The tiger looked down over the cliff. The village rested like a babe in the grassy valley's crib. She shrugged under the Peachtree's shade. "Curiosity, I believe. I was greatly surprised by some of the fantasies that Viper has. You are also a very creative person while being shy about intimate things."
"So you're just nosy."
"Curious."
"Same thing."
"No, it's not," Tigress grunted. Po crossed his arms with a pout. He took a sigh and got up to his feet. "I didn't mean to-"
"It's okay. But... Like I said, I know these fantasies aren't going to be reality."
"You don't have to be ashamed of what your mind thinks about, Po."
"I know, but... I really don't want to talk about it," Po sighed and left the tiger alone at the peach tree. He marched down the steps, sighing and groaning to himself as he rubbed his eyes. "I really shouldn't have done that. Now she's going to be worried all week. Ugh."
He stopped for a moment as a thought entered his head. There was one way to calm her concerns. Po shook his white furry head. "No, no. Even if she didn't hate me for telling, she would be weird around me. I should just... ugh, maybe I should just work out. Yeah, that'll distract me... Or give Monkey a good show," Po muttered.
Meanwhile, Tigress took a breath and stared at the grass. The mountain air faintly smelling of noodles and fresh dew, the tiger could feel the wind lightly swirl around her like thoughts tangled in a windstorm. She was curious and worried. A dangerous combination. It wasn't like Po to hide secrets, but this seemed personal. She shook her head. "It's none of my business. I shouldn't pry." She stood up and ambled down the steps.
Last time she butted in, Po nearly died because of a cannon. Maybe it was safer just to let him have his privacy? But what kind of sexual fantasies could Po possibly have that he was so worried and ashamed of? Yes, since she was a female, it would make things awkward between them, but...
Tigress stopped in her tracks. "Why am I so interested in Po's sexual fantasies?" She shook her head again and headed to the Training Hall where she found an interesting surprise. The Training Hall had everything that a warrior could ask for, especially weights for strength training. Most times, the warriors were instructed to practice functional movements, things they would need for more force behind their attacks. Tigress found Viper, Mantis, Crane, and Monkey all standing in a row looking at something in the sand pit. "What's going on?"
"It's Po. He's training."
Tigress's eyes widened. There holding weights in his hands and punching the dummies was the panda, focusing his strikes with as much precision as he could muster. His scowling focus intrigued them all. It wasn't often that Po looked so serious when training. Tigress felt a pinch in her stomach. Was he like this because of their talk?
Just as he finished, Po backed away and dropped the weights. They fell with a loud thud into the sand. As Po swiped the sweat off his brow, he looked to the sidelines where the others were. "Uh... What's wrong?"
"No, nothing, not at all, no, no, no," They all casually said. They all scattered like ants until it was only Tigress left. Po stepped out of the sand pit, scratching the back of his head.
"Uhhh hey, Tigress. Sorry about earlier, I just-"
"No, I was being insensitive. I shouldn't have asked such a private question. You don't know anything about my sexual fantasies so-"
"You have those kinds of fantasies?" Po asked with the loudest amount of shock on his face. Tigress held her face, not angry or insulted, but calculating and observant as she crossed her arms.
"Why is that such a surprise?"
"I mean, you're dedicated to Kung Fu so much that I figured you found a way to never have that kind of fantasy in your life. I don't mean to sound rude, I just-"
"Ha ha, no," Tigress chuckled. "No, I'm more normal than you think, Po."
The panda smiled with a hidden scoff. "I highly doubt that."
"Oh?" Tigress smirked.
"I don't know you much, but I bet you have some wild fantasies."
The tiger found herself chuckling, "What makes you think that?"
"You've been around China. You've seen things! I don't know, maybe your fantasy is about hooking up with a magical sorcerer and making some kind of potion to-"
"That... sounds very specific," Tigress said, lifting her eyebrow with a smirk.
"Uhhh I mean... Ugh, alright. I might as well just tell you," Po sighed. "Some of my fantasies involve some... girl and I stranded on a beach with some fruit that makes us bigger."
"Bigger?" Tigress's eyebrows rose. Po rubbed the back of his neck, looking away. "What else?"
"Alchemist woman where I turn into a monster and... show her who's boss. And then... she's meditating and I just come up and... you know... with her. Wow, this is really embarrassing."
The panda felt a gentle hand rest on his shoulder. He saw Tigress with a large smile, not mocking but understanding. "It's okay, Po. Quite honestly, I thought your fantasies were much... more graphic or inappropriate."
"Well, they felt graphic when I was meditating," Po coughed nervously. "But yeah, that's what I saw anyway."
Tigress narrowed her eyes slightly, staring straight at his jade eyes. "Is that why you were so concerned about fantasies? Because of the... expectations?"
"Yeah. But I... I shouldn't expect someone's chest to get bigger or them to do anything I want."
Tigress nodded, "But if they wanted to?"
Both Po and Tigress widened their eyes. Neither of them expected the tiger to ask that. Common sense would've answered that question. But the fact that she asked it at all shocked both of them. Po stumbled with his words when he finally said, "Uhh... it's a different... I don't know... I mean... if they... want to do it... too I guess that's fine... but... uh... they don't have to. I mean, I don't even know how you would get... what I mean is-"
"I get it, Po," Tigress quickly interrupted. "I'm sorry for asking that question."
"It's okay." There was a long pause. "Soooo does this mean things are weird between us?"
Tigress smiled, "Of course not, Po. As I said, you're not wrong for thinking about these fantasies. They're only bad when you harm someone else or yourself. Just because you think these things doesn't mean you should do them. Although part of me does want to ask who your fantasy woman is, I'll spare you the embarrassment."
"Thank you," Po sighed out of relief. The panda lifted his eyes and noticed someone at the door. Tigress spun her head towards it. "Master Shifu? What is it?"
The red panda had a long frown on his face and weary eyes. He rubbed the side of his head and took a deep sigh. "Nothing, I'm just... realizing something. I think I'll go to Mr. Ping's shop for a moment. Take care of the Jade Palace in my absence."
"Yes Master Shifu," The two bowed. Shifu grumbled down the 10,000 steps as his scowl grumbled with him. Before long, he made it into the village and into Mr. Ping's shop where he took a seat at the kitchen counter.
"Ah! Master Shifu, what will it be?" The white goose asked.
"A large bottle of lychee wine, please," Shifu sighed defeatedly, propping his head up. The goose looked back at the big older panda working with him. Li Shan shrugged.
"We uh... don't have any."
"Then a Dragon Warrior-sized dumpling, please. Anything that Po eats when he's upset," Shifu muttered.
"Oh of course," Mr. Ping said, motioning to Li Shan to get the order. "Uhhh what's wrong? Something wrong with Po?"
"No, but it involves him."
"What's wrong?"
"I just saw Tigress and Po talking with each other."
"About what?"
"I'd rather not say," Shifu muttered. "But while they were talking, I realized something that made me upset."
"What's that?" Mr. Ping asked as Li Shan gave the red panda his large dumpling. Shifu sighed and took his chopsticks. He muttered out the statement before he started eating.
"I realized how difficult it is as a father to get grandkids."
Mr. Ping and Li Shan's eyes turned white as they burst out into such loud laughter that the whole village could hear it.
What do you think? Is Po right about fantasies? Also, realistically, what kind of Kung Fu Panda fantasy do you think would best fit Po?