Hello hello,

Nervous by NOT A TOY

"Cherry lips on the west side, like I seen you for the first time. You were in my dream last night"

I stare at my email draft.

To whom it may concern,

I am a first-year undergraduate student studying a double degree in Design and Styling at the Paris School of Fashion.

I am sure you have received many emails querying the same question regarding whether you accept studying students as interns, and I desire to know the same.

I have an extensive history in fashion. I have run my own side business designing and providing alterations for the last eight years. I have participated in many design competitions, having won four that have been hosted by Gabriel and seven hosted by others. Please see a list of awards below.

It goes on further to talk more about my experiences and qualifications, and why I want to work there. But I don't know whether to mention I know Gabriel Agreste himself, or Adrien. Whoever is reading this will probably think I'm just trying to make myself look good, even though it is true. I don't want to rely on either of them to be granted positions within the industry, even if being an intern at Gabriel would technically be them helping me out in a roundabout way.

I go through and edit the email, deciding to leave them out of this. I attach a few examples of my design process and the final product before taking a deep breath, and hitting send.

I take a moment to breathe, before I pick up Manon's torn school pants and begin stitching the rip back together.

The option to intern seems to have come at a perfect time. I was worried about what my fate would be job-wise, and whilst I have dug into my savings for rent, I have been able to afford groceries and our other split bills just from what I've been earning as a private seamstress.

I posted an ad on a few platforms, Fiverr, Upwork, Facebook and quite a few people have gotten back to me. I've taken on two or three projects per week depending on what they need done, that includes previous clients like Nadja and Manon.

I've had lots of requests from people to create clothes for them from scratch, from patterns and to develop something purely on something they're picturing in their head. Currently, I don't have the time to do that around my own tinkering, especially not during uni.

I check the time. "Fuck." I got lost in the process.

I make sure everything is in order and none of the new stitching will come out while I'm gone.

Adrien looks at me wide-eyed as I bustle around the apartment, gathering myself.

"Are you okay?"

"Yes, I just lost track of time. I'm going to be late getting coffee with my tutor." I fly out the door, opting to take the stairs as opposed to waiting for the elevator.

Thankfully I'm no later than five minutes.

Ollie laughs at me. "Keeping in clutch with your reputation I see."

I glare at him. "I have been good."

He nods. "And I appreciate it. You're not that late."

"Still, I'm sorry for making you wait, especially out here in the cold," I stare up at the flakes falling from the sky, "and the snow."

He chooses a table huddled in the back of the cozy café.

"This place is cute." I smile at our surroundings.

He nods. "It has a great atmosphere, I come here a lot to design."

"I can see why."

"What would you like?"

"Oh no, it's okay, I'll grab it."

"No." He shakes his head. "I asked you here."

But… isn't he doing me a favour? I'm a bit confused about all this really…

"At least let me pay for my own, I really don't feel comfortable letting someone pay for me."

His smile falls. "Okay, if you're sure." He gets up to order and I do the same as soon as he returns.

"Do you live far from campus?" He asks.

I shake my head. "It's within reasonable walking distance."

"That's great." He clears his throat. "How long have you wanted to be a designer?"

"Oh, goodness. Since as long as I can remember, although I'm sure that's what a lot of people say. But I can't remember a time when that wasn't my first choice."

He smiles.

"So, did I… do something wrong?"

He frowns. "What?"

"I assume you asked me here for coffee to discuss my marks. I can imagine it'd be pretty serious to meet with me like this." I'm anxious about what he's going to say, but I have the utmost faith in my work. "You should know that I love what I created and I thought I hit every point of the marking criteria—"

"That isn't what I asked you here for." He flushes.

"Oh." I draw back, shutting my mouth. "Then why?"

He fiddles. "I wanted to grab coffee with you because I wanted to see you outside of an educational environment."

"Right…" I trail off, still confused. Then something clicks in my brain. "Right."

He nods.

"Isn't that inappropriate?" I cock my head at him. "A student and tutor?"

"Not in university."

It still doesn't feel right.

I open and close my mouth.

"You don't have to—I understand I sprung it on you."

I sigh. "I-I'm sorry, Ollie, clearly I misunderstood why you asked me for coffee. I'm very flattered, but I don't view you like that and it wouldn't be right in my eyes for us to pursue something like that."

He nods. "Fair enough. I'm sorry I didn't communicate properly."

"…and then we drank our coffees amongst awkward silence and small talk," I finish telling Adrien about my day.

He stares at me for a moment, before he bursts out laughing. "Marinette, I think you're the densest person I know."

"Hey! I am not." But I think back to what Alya said about all the attention I seem to get, how I'd thrive if I just let myself. "Am I?"

"You can be. Absolutely you can." He's still chuckling. "Don't get me wrong, you're also one of the most intelligent. But you can be…" he tilts his head from side to side, and doesn't finish his sentence.

I glare at him.

He only laughs some more and wraps me in a hug. "I'm only teasing."

I roll my eyes. "Yeah, yeah. I know." I flop back on the couch. "Any interesting 'developments' in your course?"

"You already know the answer to that." He moves my feet so he can sit on the couch, but places them back on his lap once he does. "Being a model, being somewhat famous, it makes you all the more wary of people surrounding you… People's interest in you, why they're interested in you and if it's for the right reasons."

"I can imagine most of the time it's not for the right reasons."

"No," he confirms. "I miss something I've never had. I knew Kagami, but things weren't serious and I didn't want them to be. We never would have worked out and it felt forced between us with our parent's breathing down our necks. In their eyes, we were perfect for each other, perfect together."

"That's wrong."

He looks at me.

"I mean, it's wrong of them to force that."

He nods. "Yeah." He sighs heavily and shakes his head. "I'm sorry, I always feel like I dump on you."

I sit up, my legs draped over his. "Hey." I fumble my hands in the hair at the nape of his neck. "You know you can always talk to me. It doesn't matter what it's about, or when. If you need to talk, vent, rant, reminisce, be vulnerable or emotional, you know I'm here for you."

"I do know that. I feel that more with you than anyone else in my life."

"What about Nino?"

"I know I can talk to him, but he doesn't understand like how you always do."

I smile. "I guess I've observed a range of experiences and unfortunately, I'm good at putting myself in the shoes of others. Well… fortunately and unfortunately."

"But that makes you all the better person because of that. No wonder everyone falls in love with you in some way."

I flush, at his words and under the intensity of his gaze. "You reckon?"

He nods. "I know it."

"How?" I breathe, unable to look away.

The corner of his lip flicks up. "Nino called it 'The Marinette Affect'."

I chuckle at that. "Elaborate."

"Him, Luka, Nathaniel, the guy at the furniture store, now your tutor… the list goes on."

"Wait. What guy at the furniture store?"

"The one who helped with your now bed."

"Oh. Oh. Right… Really?"

He smiles. "People can't help it. You can't help it. You're intoxicating."

Marinette is giggling, I can hear it as she steps out of the front school gates.

Alya is snickering with her.

I have no idea what they're laughing about. All I know, is that I want to be in on it.

"Hey, Alya!" Nino calls, throwing up a hand.

"Hey there, Nino~" she sings, sidling up to him. She runs a hand down his chest, smirking at him.

Their relationship has definitely been taken to the next level, that much I can tell. Even though we're still only fifteen—well, I suppose some people are just comfortable with that. As long as they care and love each other—which I know they do—and it's consensual.

Marinette smiles up at me. "Are you getting a ride home?"

"I'm meant to be," I shrug, "but Gorilla is still going to be another fifteen minutes."

"Why don't we all sit at the park and wait for him there?" Alya suggests. "That way you're not lingering outside of school in the way of the crowd."

"That's a great idea!" And I can't imagine Gorilla or my father disapproving when it's just a street away.

We walk that way, waving to Marinette's parents from outside the bakery.

We're about to cross the road when Sabine rushes out. "Wait, have some chouquettes."

"I don't know, Mme. Dupain-Cheng—" I begin to say.

"Thanks, Maman!" Marinette says, grasping the bag and kissing her mum's cheek. "I'll see you in a bit."

"Enjoy!" she calls as we cross the road.

"You didn't have to accept, Mari."

She looks up at me. "Why not? She's my maman, and she offered. You were about to refuse, and trust me, that's a very difficult task in the end when she puts her mind to it. You're better off accepting it when she first does."

I sigh, relenting and reaching into the paper bag. "If you say so." I shove three in my mouth at a time, struggling to close my lips over them. I might get sick from eating so many, because they're just so good, but somewhere out there, I know something is urging me on to do it. Some being or spirit animal. I can feel the hunger gnawing in the pit of my stomach for more than just salad. It's been a full-on school day! I need something hearty. I deserve it, I tell myself.

I never knew spending time with friends—even just briefly—after school would be such a great way to decompress. But it is, and I wish I could do it more.

But, all good things must come to an end, and eventually, Gorilla notifies me that he's pulled up outside of the park. It's easy enough to find him, the dark grey, almost blue sedan exterior with the black out windows.

It's a sight I'm all too familiar with.

"Thanks for spending some time with me after school, guys." I smile down at them, leaving the near empty bag of chouquettes on the bench.

"Don't worry, we won't tell your father or bodyguard that you singlehandedly nearly at a whole bag of chouquettes," Alya teases.

"I didn't!" But I know they're just teasing. "Tell your maman thank you for me, Marinette."

She stands. "Of course." She smiles, and moves towards me to give me a hug.

She trips.

"Whoa." In my effort to brace her fall, my foot slips out from under me, and we go tumbling.

I squeeze my eyes shut against the impact, the back of my head vaguely stinging. But there's a much softer impact, one I entirely wasn't expecting.

I sigh leaning into it for a brief moment before my eyes fly open and Marinette and I scramble away from each other.

Heat rushes to my cheeks, Marinette's eyes are wide, Nino and Alya are howling their arses of.

"I'm so sorry," Marinette and I apologise at the same time.

We both laugh, scratching our heads awkwardly.

She helps me to my feet. "Is your head okay?"

I feel it, there's a slight bump already forming, but I don't want to make her feel worse than she already does. "Yeah, it's alright, I'm okay. Don't worry about it, I know it happens all the time."

She pouts, and looks over me sternly. "I'm sorry about your designer clothes." She notes the dirt and grass scrapes over my jeans and white overshirt.

"Don't worry about it," I repeat again, smiling. "I mostly wear the same thing every day so my wardrobe is practically full of stuff like this."

She lets out a long breath. "Alright, if you say so."

The ride back home is quicker than I want it to be, and Father is looming at the top of the stairs when I return.

"Adrien," he starts, "are you okay?"

"Yes, Father."

"What happened?"

"Gorilla got stuck in the after-school traffic."

"What happened to you," he emphasises.

I look down at my stained clothes once more. "I tripped, it was an accident."

He huffs. "Are you okay?"

I relax a little at that. "Yes, Father, I'm alright. How was your day?"

"Busy." He clears his throat. "And yours?"

I smile. "Mine was exceptionally better than I was expecting."

"Well… that is good to hear. Clearly school wasn't a bad idea after all. You're dismissed until dinner."

I grin as I walk past him. It might be the most basic level of warmth that he shows recently, but it's more than he ever used to.

I shut my door behind me, my legs instantly turning to jelly and I slide against the back of it to become a heap on the ground.

My head throbs, so does my tail bone. But my heart is warm.

And my lips tingle, remembering the impact and full feeling of Marinette's lips on mine.

I smile.

The morning is as bright as they come, even right at the crack of dawn.

Even though I don't want to wake Marinette up, I can't help but draw back some of the curtains to let in the pinks and oranges from this morning's sunrise.

Absolutely beautiful.

After I finish eating, I wash and clean my face before rugging up. This morning's photoshoot is outside but it's a sunny day in the heat of winter and I'm not going to let the cold ruin my day.

Or this bloody photoshoot.

I hesitate when I look at Marinette's closed door. I wish I was spending the day with her. I debate leaving her a note, but why? What's the point? Why would I? To let her know I'm thinking about her?

I scoff and shake my head. I unlock the door and lock it shut behind me quietly. I push open the door to our apartment complex, letting out a puff in the freezing morning.

Gorilla is already waiting for me on the sidewalk.

I smile at him. "You didn't have to get out."

He shrugs, humphing, and opens the back door for me. He's left the heater pumping and I'm tempted to take off a few of my layers, but I can't be fucked putting them back on when we arrive, so I let myself swelter.

Thankfully, it's only a five-minute ride and I relish in the sudden cold again. I am definitely more of a winter person. I love bundling up, drinking hot chocolate to thaw my insides. I'll have to enlist Marinette's help this afternoon to make some with me, if she isn't doing anything.

I hope she isn't.

I send her a text as I walk towards the shoot.

Morning :) hope you slept well. I'm out at a photoshoot this morning, but maybe we can do something in the afternoon? Can set up the Christmas tree we bought, make some hot chocolate, rug up at home and watch a movie?

I sit in the chair getting my makeup done, thankfully, it's only quick, lasting about forty-five minutes (which is quick). They don't need to apply as much blush since I'm already flushed from the cold, but on a morning like this I need more contour.

Three hours later, she messages me back.

Hey, I just woke up. That all sounds nice, but can we do it in the evening? I've got plans in the afternoon. Hope your shoot isn't torturous!

I smile at the last part. It's not so bad.

I'm glad we'll spend time in the evening.

Still, I find myself missing her.

I check my emails one more time before flying out the door. Just in case Gabriel have gotten back to me in the last ten minutes that I hadn't checked.

I'm going to be late. I sigh. Oh well, he knows it's not out of the ordinary.

When I arrive Luka is already sitting down and has ordered a cup of tea. He's not much of a coffee person, and today, I'm committed to following his example.

"Hi," I smile, "sorry I'm late."

"All good." He tucks his phone away. "You going to order a coffee?"

"I've already had one, thinking I might order myself some lemon and ginger tea, with some honey on the side."

"Ah." He smiles. "Nice change of pace."

I nod to his. "What did you get?"

"Peppermint."

I scrunch my nose up at that, and he laughs. "Hey, it's coming to the minty season."

It's already December and there's candy canes everywhere. I'm not a big fan of mint, at all. I don't like peppermint, spearmint, or anything of the like with any remote taste linked to that. That being said, I don't mind mint as a herb, toothpaste, or strawberry breath mints.

"Yeah, yeah." I shrug, ordering myself some tea from a QR code on the table. "How are you? How has it been travelling? I've been keeping track of you, it looked amazing!"

"It was!" He grins. "We had such a great time. We got to do some sightseeing but not as much as I would've liked, although I assumed that would be the case. We had to rehearse, set up, prepare for each show."

"No rest for the wicked," I say.

"Exactly."

"What are you going to do now that Jagged's leg of the European tour is over."

"He's come back for Christmas. We're going to stay here until January, then, I don't know. I might continue travelling with him, or we've also gained so many new fans we've been wondering if we should do our own tour."

"Either way, that sounds exciting!"

"Yeah. Anyway, enough about me. What's been going on with you? How's your first semester of uni been?"

"It was really good! A lot of work, very intensive, but I can tell it's going to be worth it. They're having us apply and acquire internships for the rest of our degrees, hopefully starting these holidays."

"That'll be good. Are you still living at home?"

Oh. I'm surprised by that. Hadn't I told him? "Actually, I've moved out."

"Oh great! Where to?"

"An apartment about two kilometres away from campus, it's good. Nice walk, or I can use my scooter if it's raining—there's plenty of parking."

"Is that how you got here today?"

I nod.

"Sorry, if I'd known you were living further away I would've suggested somewhere closer to you."

I wave away his apology. "Nah, don't worry about it. It's nice to come back to this side of town."

"You living alone?"

"Actually," I scratch my neck, "I'm living with Adrien."

His eyes go wide. "Wow. Really? I'm surprised his father let him move out in the first place."

"We're surprised too."

"That's great… so, are you two happy?"

"Yeah! It's been great living together. Adrien is really polite and respectful, he's neat and clean, does his part or helps out. I'm the main cooker, but I can't say I blame him for that, he's learning with me."

"That's great." He clears his throat. "How long have you been together?"

"Since…" I think back to when we moved out, "like early September." Something like that, my brain is still fried from uni.

"It'll be your first Christmas together."

"Yeah, we're going to set up the tree tonight actually, make some hot chocolate, and then probably watch a movie."

"That'll be fun."

I nod.

"How does his father feel about it, and your parents… about you two dating. I know Tom can be quite protective."

"Oh," I laugh, "we're not dating."

"Oh!" He blinks. "Right, sorry. I got confused."

"It's okay! Maybe I wasn't clear enough." I shrug. "We're just friends."

"Well… are you seeing anyone right now?"

"No." I shrug. "How about you? Any tour romances?"

He shrugs. "A couple, but it's the kind of relationship you know won't last long because of… everything that's happening around you."

I nod. "Yeah, I get that." I bite my lip. "I don't know if I'm just getting in my head about it but… were you curious about all this because… actually never mind." That's so narcissistic of me to think.

He cocks his head. "No, go on."

"I don't know how to say it." I laugh.

"Were you wondering if… it's because I'm still interested in you?"

"Yeah." I smile sheepishly.

He sighs. "Maybe. I don't know. Well, I do but it's… ah." He shakes his head. "I was asking because I wouldn't have minded trying to pursue you. But you don't seem to want to get onto the dating scene."

"Well, I appreciate you being honest with me."

He smiles.

"I'm just kind of going with the flow at the moment. And, honestly… I'm not sure if I'd want to date you again. You're a great friend, and I don't want that to change. Maybe it was because we were young, but I didn't feel like we were as close when we dated as we were as friends. It just didn't feel right, and I thought we'd agreed on that."

He nods. "We did, I still agree with it. But like you said, it could've just been when we were younger." He shrugs. "I'd rather keep you as a friend anyway. You're not interested in seeing how we might be now, and I understand."

"I'm home," I call out as I open the door, "let's get this Christmas decorating going."

There's no reply and once I shut the door behind me, I realise Adrien is in the shower. He must have gotten back recently too if he's just showering now. I know how much he hates to keep the hairspray and makeup on for longer than needed.

I set my bag down on the counter as the water shuts off. I take and shake off my coat before hanging it on the rack by the door.

The bathroom door opens.

"Hey," I say.

He yelps.

"You're jumpy, aren't you?" I laugh and turn around. Heat rises to my cheeks.

"Ha-ha." He sulks. "Sorry," he looks down at himself, clad only in a towel wrapped around his waist, "I didn't realise you were back."

"I only just stepped through the door." I laugh shyly. "Besides, it's your home too." I shrug, trying not to look in his direction, but my eyes betray me as he walks past the kitchen towards his room, and I bite my lip at the droplets of water sliding down his sculpted abdomen.

He shuts his bedroom door behind him, hopefully none the wiser to my gawking. Drooling.

"I'm going to have a shower too, then we can get started on putting up the tree!" I call.

"Okay!" He replies back through the door.

Dear god. I stop and stare at nothing in my room for a moment, trying to clear the haze in my brain.

I need a cold shower. But I don't want to have a cold shower.

When was the last time I paid any attention to my libido?

The throbbing between my legs is demanding some attention. I haven't had this kind of reaction since… well, since… never.

I need a shower. But if I take care of this in the shower… not only will I not be able to look at Adrien, but I'll think about the fact that he's using the same shower where I took care of myself.

For fucks sake, he uses the same shower anyway. Completely naked too, might I add. There's a lot less left to the imagination behind that door.

"Fuck it." I hiss, grabbing my pyjamas from behind my pillow, some undies, and a bra, because god knows my nipples will be standing to attention as soon as I come out of there. And I don't need Adrien's brain thinking up any possibilities about the consequences of me getting home, him not realising, and emerging from a steaming shower half naked and still not fully dry.

"Wait!" Adrien calls and rushes for me. "Can I hang my towel up?"

I swallow thickly, and nod, watching the muscles in his arms stretch as he reaches across me to hang it up. I inhale deeply, he smells fresh, like musk and a little bit like patchouli. He used my soap.

"Are you okay?"

"Did you use my soap?" I glare at him, but all I want to do is smile, and I do.

He grins. "Maybe, it smells nice. Do I smell nice?"

"Yes," I grumble, and shove him out of the bathroom. "Go make yourself useful and start opening the boxes!" I bark.

He laughs, grinning back at me as I shut the door.

Fuck. He has a stellar smile.

One extraordinary pleasant and pulsating shower later, I step out of the bathroom with a sigh of contentment. My heart is still racing a little and I can't stop the smile across my face.

"God, you take forever sometimes."

I laugh breathlessly. "I needed that shower."

He only raises a brow at me, a smile tugging at his lips. "I can tell."

I blink. "What's that supposed to mean?" Did he figure it out? I thought I was mostly silent, but did he hear me?

He shrugs. "You seemed aggravated, I know a hot shower fixes that for you."

"True." I nod. Usually if I'm stuck and frustrated, a shower is exactly what I need. I throw my dirty clothes in the laundry basket and join him in the living room. "Do you want me to make hot chocolate now and we can drink it while we build the tree? Or would you rather me make it before the movie?"

"Whenever you want." He thinks for a moment. "Can't we have several cups?" He waggles his eyebrows and I laugh.

"I don't see why not." I meander into the kitchen gathering chocolate, milk, cream, and the other ingredients.

It's not long before both of us have a beautiful, decadent steaming cup of hot chocolate and cream.

"Alright," Adrien says as he fixates the stem of the tree into its base. We've decided to put it against the wall by the windows.

I pull the branches from the box, locking them in around the tree, around and around until we inset the big bush into the stem that makes up the top of the tree.

I had gone out and gotten decorations earlier this week, we're a little late to the Christmas decorating party, but I still found some beautiful ornaments, plus the ones I stole from home.

"Do you reckon we should do tinsel?" I ask Adrien.

"I think the tree would look a little empty without it, we should do the lights too after."

So, we do, wrapping each around until we deem it enough and begin setting the ornaments on the tree.

I place some wooden reindeer by the shoe rack to greet us when we come home while Adrien sets a stuffed Santa on the couch and another in a rocking chair on the entertainment unit.

We settle back on the couch, admiring out work.

"I like it," he says.

"So do I. Now, what are we going to do for dinner? I'm not sure how bothered I can be to cook." I wince.

"Don't worry about it, I'll cook."

"Are you sure?" I watch after him as he stands.

"Yeah, I can just make some burritos or something. They're easy enough."

"Do we have everything though?"

He nods. "I checked earlier. We've still got a can of beans and a bag of rice we haven't used yet—not that they're going to go off anytime soon, but the mince will soon if we don't use it."

I smile, admiring how much he's grown in the months we've been living together, he's certainly become a lot more aware and conscious.

I choose to sit up on one of the stools at the breakfast bar as he cooks. He insists on chopping everything up himself, but he still struggles with the onion, so I take over that for him.

"How was your shoot?"

"Not too bad. Went by faster than I expected, and it was a beautiful day too."

That's another thing, he's always looking around him and appreciating his surroundings.

"How was your day?"

"The same. I'm still anxiously awaiting a response from Gabriel. And… I caught up with Luka."

That gets his attention, and he turns back to look at me. "Oh? I didn't realise they were back. How is he?"

"Good. The touring sounded like a blast, but he's exhausted and I'm sure the others are too."

"It's great that you two are still friends."

"Yeah." I scratch my neck. "Although, today he did admit he's still interested and wouldn't mind pursuing me."

He pauses. "What did you say?"

"That I wasn't interested."

"Interesting that he told you his intentions."

"It's because he thought we were dating."

He turns back to me and smiles. "We could pretend like we are just to see how he and everyone else reacts."

I laugh. "We get mistaken for it enough already, I don't think we have to try any more than we already are. Maybe a kiss here or there but…" I shrug.

He turns around quickly, a hint of heat in his cheeks.

I smirk. "Would you like to kiss me?"

"Would it be wrong for me to admit I have an acute memory of the time you did, even though it was an accident?"

"I think you just did admit it, but no, I don't think it's wrong. I think about it too."

"You do?" He looks alarmed at that, and I laugh.

"Don't worry, it's not so much the kiss itself but the embarrassment that it happened."

"Oh."

I cock my head at him, slightly confused, but decide to change the subject. "So, what movie do you want to watch?"

"Surely a Christmas one."

"As long as it's not Love Actually…"

"What!?" He gasps, spinning back to face me. "What does that mean?"

I shrug. "I've never liked it, except for Hugh Grant dancing, I'm not a fan of the rest."

He chuckles at that. "Fine, how about Home Alone? Or Elf?"

"There's a new one out with Leighton Meester I've been wanting to see. I think it's called EXmas."

"Deal."