A/N: It's a dirty chapter! NSFW! Exercise caution or whatever! And enjoy.
Jane transformed as soon as they crossed the threshold into her bedroom, something about the change of location spurring her into action. As Maura reached for the lamp on Jane's bedside table, Jane pulled her away, their fingers still entwined.
"Leave it off."
Maura didn't mind that at all. Truth be told, Jane's bedroom was terribly drab and the less Maura saw of it the better. Plus, something about not being able to see Jane when she got like this felt particularly exhilarating in the moment. She really didn't think she could know anyone better than she knew Jane, but the person she became during sex felt intoxicatingly unfamiliar.
Maura allowed herself to be drawn in towards Jane's body for a kiss.
"What do you want?" Jane asked against her lips, one hand coming up to push Maura's hair out of her face.
Maura responded wordlessly and cupped Jane over her pants, grabbing the stiffer material around the zipper of her slacks and giving it a firm tug. The sound Jane made had Maura pretty confident that she'd gotten her not-so-subtle message across, but to be absolutely certain, she ran her palm hard along Jane's pelvis, from her belt buckle to the bottom of the seam of her pants, mimicking the length of what she was looking for, stroking back and forth like what she needed was already there. Jane's hips bucked once, and then she pushed Maura away.
"Undress and get on the bed."
Maura shivered. Every time Jane spoke to her in that deep, focused voice it was like a drop of ink in water, unfurling slowly, gradually clouding her thoughts until nothing was left but wet hot desire. She stepped into a patch of moonlight to make it a show and reached behind herself to pull down the zipper of her skirt. She searched the darkness for Jane's eyes and while her own hadn't quite adjusted yet, she could just make out the sight of Jane watching her carefully. She shimmied out of her skirt, unbuttoned and discarded her blouse, quickly added her bra and panties to the pile. Jane didn't move.
Maura realized she was trembling as she climbed onto the bed. She took a slow, deep breath through her nose as she tried to steady herself. She hadn't been this nervous the first time. Perhaps the thrill of the chase had overwhelmed any nerves the night before, or maybe tonight she simply better knew what Jane was capable of.
"Face down," Jane said.
Maura's heart was racing, desire pooled in her stomach. She turned over, pressed her face into the bedspread, felt her breath hot against her cheeks. She listened as Jane shed her clothes, heard the sound of a drawer opening and closing, then of leather rubbing on leather. In the near silence of the bedroom, the muted sounds of buckles being done up and the soft click of the belt prong settling against the frame all rang out much louder than they should have. She held her breath.
Generally speaking, Maura was the type that liked to make a lover work for it. She'd been told what to do in the bedroom a time or two, always by men, and she had a tendency to put up a fight. She knew the value of what she had to offer, what a gift her submission truly was, and she felt it had to be earned. But the idea of playing coy or trying to gain the upper hand held no appeal currently.
The way Jane spoke to her felt different, her voice firm but soft—not exactly demanding compliance, but rather making a compelling argument that it was simply the only option.
In their years working together, Maura had the opportunity to hear Jane deliver commands more than once. She'd been present when a suspect was apprehended on a few occasions and she frequently observed Jane's interviews from the other side of the glass. This absolutely wasn't that voice. It was familiar, but it didn't have the arrogance or the acerbic edge of the Jane that bulldozed her way through interrogations. That Jane rubbed people the wrong way and she was supposed to.
"Get on your knees."
Again in that quiet, powerful timbre. Jane was speaking so softly but her voice somehow filled the room and Maura's head. Something clicked into place and Maura realized under what circumstances she'd heard Jane speak like this. It was the same tone she used when she was reassuring grieving families that they would heal or when she was speaking to a victim and promising justice. Perhaps most of all it was the voice she used when calmly victorious, when she returned to report back on a job well done.
Maura braced herself up on her hands and drew her knees up slowly. She felt the air shift before she felt the dip of the mattress and she pulled in a ragged breath as Jane settled in behind her.
It was a good thing she hadn't been inclined toward playing hard to get because the gasp she let out when Jane took hold of her waist would have given away any leverage she had. She sighed in anticipation as she felt Jane's fingers press in against the tender skin along her hips. She felt as Jane spread her own knees far apart, pressed in close and dragged the length of the strap along Maura's sex. Jane let out a low, guttural sound when she encountered absolutely no friction.
Maura had known she was so ready for Jane, had already felt it slick against her thighs, and now she could hear it too, as Jane dragged the silicone back and forth along her slit, coating the strap with Maura's wetness. It was Maura's first indication of the size of the toy and her stomach clenched in anticipation. She dug her fingers into the mattress.
"This is what you want?" Jane asked.
"Yes," Maura exhaled in a rush. "Please. I need your hands on me, Jane. I need your body against mine. Please."
Jane wrapped one arm just below Maura's breasts and pulled her upright so her back was pressed against Jane's front and Maura gladly settled against her, luxuriating in the feeling of Jane's long lean body enveloping hers. Jane's other hand snaked down Maura's abdomen and she spread her first two fingers so that index and middle slid down either side of Maura's clit. Jane pushed her hips forward to glide the length of the toy against her, grabbed the head of it, then guided it slowly inside of Maura.
There was that familiar moment of pressure and Maura's body tensed up as the head nudged its way in. She heard Jane's breath hitch and realized that she could surely feel the resistance pressing back against her. That thought alone made Maura absolutely sick with want. She bore down on the toy and the breach made her gasp and then it was over, replaced only with the sublime feeling of fullness.
She lowered herself all the way down to the hilt as Jane kept perfectly still, allowing her the opportunity to adjust to the intrusion. Tears stung her eyes but not from pain.
"Jane," she moaned, voice strained, her chest tight with emotion. This was uncharted territory for her. Maura had been with women, but never like this, and she hadn't been sure what to expect. She'd certainly thought about this kind of sex before in fantasies, and had been thinking about it very concretely since the moment that morning when Jane had intimated that this was her plan for the evening. She had been almost giddy with excitement, but some part of her had wondered if it might somehow feel less intimate, or a little impersonal—joined together, yes, but by way of something artificial.
She'd been wrong. The intimacy of the moment astounded her. She pulled in a shaky breath.
"It's alright," Jane reassured, again in that perfect, low voice, and kissed her shoulder. "I've got you."
Maura melted back against Jane, throwing one arm up behind Jane's head, fingers tangling in her hair, and the other reaching back to grab Jane's ass, urging her on. Jane kept her one arm hooked around Maura's stomach and placed her other hand against Maura's abdomen. She rolled her hips, withdrawing the toy just slightly before plunging back in. Maura groaned her approval. Jane did it once more, still slowly, and again Maura encouraged her on.
"Maura," Jane murmured against her ear, her arm tightening around her as she increased the tempo. "You feel so good. You feel so fucking good."
Maura whimpered softly and drowned herself in the rhythmic sounds of their coupling, the smooth wet sound of the strap gliding in and out of her, the sharp slap of her ass against Jane's thighs as Jane picked up the pace. She only wished she could see what they looked like, too. She just knew they looked incredible together.
Jane drew her hand up to Maura's breasts, running scarred palms over hardened nipples, and Maura turned her head to find Jane's mouth for a messy, gasping kiss. Jane's hand slid further to take a firm hold of Maura's neck, intent to prolong the kiss, but the pressure of Jane's hand against her throat caused Maura's stomach to drop and she moaned shamelessly into Jane's mouth. Jane stilled her hips, immediately let go and drew back from the kiss. Maura's eyes flew open. They stared at each other for a beat.
"Yeah?" Jane asked, arching her brow.
Maura blushed a deep red and shrugged.
"Apparently."
"Well, we'll discuss that later." Jane smiled wolfishly and resumed the kiss, her hips picking up their steady meter again. Maura hummed her approval, kissing long and wet, biting and sucking at Jane's lips until the pleasure gradually building at her core forced her to throw her head back in a groan. Whether it was an educated or lucky guess, Jane had chosen the absolute right position for Maura and she was already teetering on the edge.
Jane slid the hand she had on Maura's hips around to her front, dipping her fingers into Maura's wetness and pressing them against her clit. Maura quickly placed her hand over Jane's.
"No," Maura panted. "Not yet, not like this. I want you on top of me." Jane dutifully slowed down, albeit without pulling out, her finger still swirling a slow circle against Maura's clit.
"You know it's not gonna be just one, right?" Jane nipped at Maura's ear and Maura shuddered in pleasure, but she wouldn't be swayed. She slapped lightly at Jane's hand.
"Obviously," Maura purred, pushing back against Jane for a moment. "But this is something of a first time for me, and I'd like to look you in the eyes."
Jane was evidently easily convinced and she made a wordless sound of agreement. She slipped out gently and allowed Maura to turn over on her back. Before Jane could protest, Maura reached over to turn on one of the bedside lamps. The warm light illuminated Jane's face and Maura smiled like she hadn't seen her in days, reaching a hand up to push sweaty hair back behind Jane's ear. Jane smiled in return, almost shyly. Maura could still not quite comprehend how Jane could be both so commanding and sheepish in equal measure. Either way she felt as though her heart was stretched to capacity.
Jane dipped down to kiss Maura, pressing her tongue into her mouth as she lined up the strap and re-entered her effortlessly. Maura offered her very vocal approval into the kiss.
With her hands at the backs of Jane's thighs, Maura set the new pace to something much slower and Jane immediately acquiesced, both sets of hips finding a new, long, languid rhythm. This was exactly what she wanted, to move together and to see Jane while she's inside of her and to feel this so completely. Maura exhaled breathily, looking up at Jane with glistening eyes. She reached up and stroked her fingers down Jane's jaw.
"I love you. I love you so much, Jane."
Jane's cheeks reddened, and Maura could tell it wasn't from exertion. Jane swallowed hard.
"I love you too. So much."
Jane's voice broke and that appeared to break her resolve. She buried her face down against Maura's shoulder and tried to hide from the moment, though her hips never stopped.
"Oh no you don't." Maura tutted lightly. her hands coming up to take hold of Jane's jaw, firmly directing her head back up so Maura could look in her eyes.
"What is this, Jane?" She tilted her head, once again catching Jane's eyes as she tried to look away. Maura was both moved by Jane's vulnerability and eager for her opportunity to run the show. She smiled and stroked her thumb against Jane's lower lip.
"Oh I see. So tough and in charge when it's fucking," Maura cooed softly, "but you're suddenly bashful when we're making love?"
Jane's eyes went wide and her mouth dropped open. Maura watched her struggle with processing nearly every part of the sentence, a combination of words she surely never expected to hear from Maura. She offered Jane a deeply satisfied smile in return.
Maura had a whole host of words she knew she could use to make Jane's head spin, confessions of love and lust and everything in between, but when it came to these sorts of things, Maura was also quite skilled with non-verbal communication. So she showed Jane it was love with the way her hands grasped desperately against Jane's back, fingertips trying vainly to grasp on to sweat-slicked muscles, trying to pull Jane further inside her . She showed her in the way her eyes never left Jane's—even when the pleasure demanded she ought to close her eyes, throw her head back, scream for God. Instead, she watched Jane, repeated Jane's name like a mantra, begged Jane to fuck her.
Jane did and Maura knew with certainty that she had her. She had Jane for as long as she wanted.
Back bowed, she lifted herself up off the bed, hooked one leg around the back of Jane's thigh to keep Jane right where she needed her, and opened herself up to accept as much as she could. Rolling her hips, Maura put to use her enviable core strength developed from years of yoga, reaped the benefits of her diligently performed Kegels, and ground the base of the strap back hard against her lover.
Maura watched carefully, refusing to chase her own release until she could figure out if she could bring Jane with her. Jane groaned as they stumbled on just the right angle, eyes rolling back in her head, and immediately Maura was feral.
Maura basically had sex down to an exact science, and from a strictly anatomical perspective, nothing about this position was ideal for her. Gone was the exquisite pressure the previous position had offered against her anterior wall, not to mention their bodies were pressed far too closely together for there to be any room for a hand to slip between them, while the depth the strap could reach at this angle was much less than the previous one. On top of all that, with all the methods at her disposal for bringing Jane to climax, bucking the strap back against her was perhaps the least efficient means Maura could have chosen.
None of that mattered.
From the moment when Jane had groaned as the base hit her just right, nothing was more important to Maura than Jane coming on top of her. Maura's own orgasm became entirely inconsequential to her, which in some subversive way was only serving to arouse her more, which came as a bit of a surprise. She'd always been quick to veer off course if she felt a man was using her body to achieve his pleasure without regard for hers, but now the idea of Jane doing the same was electrifying.
Perhaps it was because she could tell that Jane was putting so much effort holding back, working so diligently and steadfastly to bring Maura to orgasm, valiantly fighting back against the personal gratification that Maura was suddenly hellbent on delivering. She was practically seeing red.
"Jane," she breathed. "Jane, I want you to come." She grabbed either side of Jane's face, cradled her jaw with her fingers, and watched as Jane's eyes went wide. Maura moaned again, writhed, pressed back up into Jane as firmly as she could. "I need it. Can you do it for me, Jane? Can you come from this?"
"Jesus Christ, Maura," Jane replied hoarsely, her mouth hanging open in an expression of disbelief as Maura continued to move wantonly beneath her. Jane was working so hard to keep her rhythm, her brow knit in concentration. "I'm trying to do something here."
The unexpected eroticism of disagreeing about who would come first was nearly enough to send Maura over the edge all on its own. Despite the fact that their position was only working for her very indirectly, she could feel her release building deep and far away, growing in the furthest pit of her stomach instead of the heat of her center. She clung to Jane, grasped at every part of her.
"You will. Oh god. You will, I promise," Maura gasped. "Please, Jane." She was whining now, and she could only hope it was in a sexy way, wriggling her body almost feverishly against Jane's in a blatant attempt to convince her. "Please."
Jane grunted, eyes squeezed shut, but continued to stubbornly fight her. Maura, undeterred, kept repeating please, please over and over, kept bucking her hips up and grabbing the straps cutting against Jane's hips to encourage her deeper or harder or faster or, god, whatever it was going to take. However she had to fuck her, Maura so desperately wanted Jane to do it.
Sometime around the twentieth or twenty-first 'please' Jane finally relented and gave herself over to Maura's demands. She groaned loudly, almost resentfully, and then put her head down and went after what she needed. Jane's angle changed, her thrusts became quicker, shallower, her breaths coming in staccato rhythm. None of it should have worked for Maura but it did and that heavy, pulsing euphoria kept building steadily in her depths. She watched as Jane's eyes grew hazy and unfocused but never left her face. Jane, so obviously in the thick of her pleasure now, still watched Maura like a hawk, and Maura knew that one single indication that she was in any discomfort would have Jane hitting the emergency brakes. That alone ensured it wouldn't happen. Maura gave herself right back to Jane, worked her hips in time with hers, kissed every part of her she could reach. She watched in delirious anticipation as Jane worked herself closer and closer.
She wasn't sure she'd ever experienced sex quite like this. Despite the obvious mechanical similarities, this had absolutely nothing in common with the sex she'd had with men. She'd enjoyed that sex, of course. She enjoyed men, and she'd put a lot of effort into learning how to coax men into giving her exactly what she wanted from them, and when she wasn't in the throes of ecstasy she'd surely spend some time ruminating on the way that gender contributed to this moment between her and Jane, but all she knew right now was that this was something else entirely. She gave herself over to it entirely. Right now the only thing she wanted in the world was for Jane to grind out her release against her body and send them both over the edge.
"Maura." Jane was breathing so hard, her entire taut body glistened in the lamp light. Maura wanted to lick every inch of her. She probably would, after. "Oh fuck, Maura, please, now, it's gotta be now."
Maura gripped Jane with her thighs and rode her back, both of them seeking out what she needed, and truth be told, it was a little inelegant, but it was also spectacular. Maura ultimately won their little game of chicken, but only barely: with their eyes locked on each other's, Maura chased Jane over the edge as soon as she saw the twitch of Jane's eyebrows, her mouth open, the quiver that conveyed both the beginning of her climax and the tremendous effort it was taking to maintain their eye contact. Soon Jane was moaning loudly, unintelligibly, hips still driving them through their mutual aftershocks, chasing every last burst of pleasure. Maura, meanwhile, gave herself over to oblivion, simply repeating Jane, Jane, Jane as her body turned to jelly and her mind went wonderfully blank.
At Maura's encouragement, Jane collapsed on top of her, and when she tried to roll off Maura rediscovered her strength in time to hold her close.
"No," she said softly, right into Jane's ear. It felt incredibly right to have Jane still inside her and she wasn't ready for the loss of it. "No, please stay. Stay for a bit." She kissed Jane's cheek, her jaw, her forehead, finally her lips. Jane kissed back, and she gazed at Maura with eyes that looked delirious and spent and proud. Maura wasn't sure she'd ever thought her more beautiful. She stroked her hands along Jane's body, running her fingers the length of her sides and over her shoulders and down her arms. Jane shivered.
"Okay," Jane agreed easily, relaxing her body back down against Maura's. She smiled down at her. "For how long?"
Maura laughed. "Forever. I don't know. What kind of question is that? Just hold me, Jane."