16 January 1993

"Well, what do you think?"

She paused and looked around the office, at how modern it looked, how efficient everyone appeared and felt a genuine sense of anticipation and excitement in her belly. It was so different from how she had felt upon her arrival at Barton Street, shrouded in a cloak of scandal. This time, it felt nice to know she had been chosen.

Kim had been as good as her word and a letter, inviting her to an initial interview, had landed on the doormat a few days after the new year. Frank had made noises about it, as she had expected, but from the moment she had read the words, she'd known that she was curious enough to take Kim up on her offer. She had nothing to lose after all and everything to gain, despite what others might think of the unit.

"It all looks very good, Ma'am."

"I'm glad you think so," Kim beamed, leading her towards her own office, separated as it was from the main room by large glass windows. "I've prided myself in the short time I've been here in bringing things up to a decent standard."

"You mean they weren't before?"

"Well, I'm sure it'll come as no surprise to you that there were very few women in MS15 before I took over, and they had never had a female Superintendent. Now, we have three female DCs and you would make our first female DS." Kim poured two cups of coffee from the pot on the side and handed her one. "If you choose to join us that is."

"You certainly make it sound very tempting," she replied, sitting down in one of the two leather chairs that sat in the corner of the office by the window. It was certainly one of the most salubrious offices she had ever been in and she couldn't help but wonder if she might occupy one similar in the future.

"So, what's holding you back? I hope it's not Frank."

She bristled slightly at the mention of his name, at the suggestion that he would be anything other than supportive, even if the assumption were to be true. "It's not that."

"No?"

"Well…" she paused, not wanting to appear disloyal. "He did suggest that it might not be the best career move for me right now."

"Why, because we're seen as the enemy? I want to dispel the myth that everyone has about MS15. As I said before, we're there to root out the officers who have no business being in the job. Frank himself did once say to me that he saw us as a 'necessary evil'." Kim paused. "Have you heard anything officially yet from Barton Street?"

"Yes Ma'am, in fact I got a letter the other day."

"Oh yes? Saying what?"

"That no further action was going to be taken against me with regards to what happened to Mr Patel, that my suspension was therefore lifted, and I was free to return to work." She thought back on the short, typewritten letter that she had received, how the bland words had made her feel, almost as though they were doing her a favour.

"But you're determined not to go back?"

"The thing is Ma'am," she put her cup down on the coffee table. "I made a complaint about my DI, about certain comments he'd made towards me and that seems to have been completely brushed under the carpet. In fact, when I telephoned Chief Superintendent Oliver to tell him I wouldn't be coming back, I asked him about it, and he pretended he didn't know what I was talking about." She laughed shortly at the memory of the conversation. "Even if I could get over the investigation into my conduct, that sort of put the tin lid on it."

"What sort of comments?" Kim peered at her curiously.

"Oh…he made a comment about supporting me through the investigation which he suggested would be contingent on me sleeping with him." Kim's eyebrows shot up. "I mean, it wasn't as overt at that, but, well, he mentioned Frank and…the implication I took was that he thought if I could sleep with Frank, I could sleep with him too. As if it was my 'thing'."

"Well, I can understand how upsetting such a remark would be, but I'm not surprised that they've seen fit to ignore it. There's still a lot of progress to be made in the Met when it comes to equality of the sexes."

"Yes Ma'am."

"So…" Kim leaned forwards, "taking all of that into account…can I take it that if I make a formal offer to you for a position here as Detective Sergeant that you would take it?"

She paused, thinking on Frank and what he might say or do, then remembered that it was her career and the path it took was entirely up to her. Even if there was a way back to Sun Hill, to the security she had had there, as she had told him, she wasn't sure she wanted to take it.

"Yes Ma'am," she replied. "Yes, I would."

XXXX

"You'll be pleased to hear I spoke to Mr Conway."

"About Chris?" Frank paused halfway past Jack's office and turned back to face him. "What did he say?"

"Well, he hummed and hawed about it a bit, but deep down he knows that she's a good officer and that losing her from the team didn't exactly do us any favours. Ultimately, he said he would be in favour of it."

"Brilliant!"

"Steady on, he's still got to convince Mr Brownlow that it's a viable idea."

"Well of course it is, for the reasons you've just said," Frank said, following him back into his office. "She's an asset. We need her, especially now she's basically told Barton Street to stuff it."

"He thinks Brownlow might be concerned about the optics."

"So, she keeps her head down, gets results. Give it 6 months and nobody's going to care about what optics there might be."

"Well, I'm glad you're so confident, Frank."

"Look Guv, she needs this. She's been all over the place since she went to Barton Street to the point where she's seriously considering joining MS15!" He shuddered at the very prospect. After their last conversation, he had tried to keep his counsel on what he thought about that suggestion and when Kim had written asking her to go in for an initial interview, he had said little, but left her in no doubt what he thought. For a time, he thought she might have been wavering, but then the letter had come from Barton Street, ostensibly clearing her of any wrongdoing, followed by her conversation with Oliver whereupon she had declared she had no intention of ever returning there and he knew the prospect of MS15 had become even more tantalising.

"MS15?" Jack frowned. "What, Kim Reid?"

"That's right. She bumped into her in the supermarket on New Year's Eve, which led to a cosy chat over coffee, which led to the prospect of a job, which has now led to her being over there today for an interview! I've tried to tell her that it's a bad move…"

"Is it?" Jack sat back in his seat. "She could do a lot worse."

"Oh, come on Jack, MS15? Working with the likes of Petch? I certainly haven't forgotten him from all that business over the Lennie Powell shooting and you've had your run-ins with him in the past as well."

"The man's just doing his job."

"Not to mention Reid herself. She was keen enough to get her claws into Chris when she was here, and now she's well and truly on her way to doing it!"

"Maybe she sees the potential of a good officer." Jack paused. "What bothers you more, her working at MS15 or her working with Kim Reid?"

"Both," he shuffled from foot to foot. "It's not a place for her."

Jack smiled in an annoyingly knowing way just as the phone on the desk rang, and he had no choice but to excuse himself. Wandering back to his own office, he could only imagine what the other man was thinking given it likely wasn't too far from his own thoughts, namely that he didn't like the idea of Reid pouring poison in his wife's ear about him. It had been bad enough when she had been stationed at Sun Hill but at least he'd been able to keep a weather eye on it all and bring Christina back into line when it had been required. Working full time with Reid, away from his watchful gaze, made him nervous, not professionally, but personally.

"Martella, have you finished those statements yet?" he asked harshly, the sight of her putting on her coat bringing him back to the mundane reality of day-to-day police work.

"Yes Guv, I'm going to get them submitted this afternoon."

"About time too. Where are you off to anyway? I hope it's something worthwhile."

"Depends on how you look at it," Viv replied. "I'm meeting your wife for lunch."

"Lunch is for wimps."

"So they say."

He paused, "You…uh…you know where she's been this morning?"

Viv smiled knowingly, "If you mean do I know she's been for an interview at MS15, then yes Guv, I do. She told me the other week about it."

"And?"

"And what?"

"What do you think about it?"

"About her possibly going to MS15?" Viv shrugged. "Can't say I've really given it much consideration to be honest. It's got to be better than Barton Street and certainly better than being stuck at home on suspension." She paused and narrowed her eyes. "Why? What do you think about it?"

He opened his mouth and then paused. It was all too easy to forget the nature of relationships within the office and the way gossip could spread. "It's her choice at the end of the day, but I would have thought coming back here would have been more appealing."

"What? Is there a chance she could come back here?"

"Let's just say, positive discussions are ongoing." Turning back into his office, he took his seat at his desk, watching as Viv gathered up her bag and then hurried out of the room. Hopefully she would pass the information on. Hopefully it might have some effect. He had just lifted the first in a large number of reports that were sitting on his desk awaiting his attentions when there was a sharp rap at the door and Ted appeared.

"Did I hear right?" he asked. "Chris might be on her way back here?"

"Maybe."

"You think Brownlow would say yes?"

"Conway's already on board, according to Meadows, and we all know how a gentle nudge in the right direction usually gets things done the way we want them done. If she doesn't decide to go to MS15 first that is."

"You certainly weren't happy about that prospect when you mentioned it the other day."

"I'm not."

"So, what have you said to her about it?"

"Not much. I'm trying to avoid getting into an argument with her about it. But once she hears that coming back here is a realistic prospect…well…which would you pick?"

"Here, but that should come as no surprise. I would imagine you would make the same choice, but Chris is different. She's got ambition, and she likely wants to come out from under your shadow."

He made a face, thinking back to what she had said about perhaps not wanting things to be the way they once had been. "She's never been in my shadow, Ted. I could see she had potential early on and I encouraged that."

"Yeah, in more ways than one."

"Leave it out."

"I'm sorry," the other man grinned. "Look, whatever she chooses, you got what you wanted. You got her. She's yours."

"Yeah, yeah she is."

"Fancy a drink over lunch? Jim and Tosh are already headed down the pub."

"Yeah," he pushed his chair back from the desk and tossed the report back on top of the pile. Anything was better than that. "Why not?"

XXXX

"So, you said yes then?"

"Yes, I did."

"So, you're definitely going to go there?"

"Yes, I am."

"Blimey…" Viv sat back in her seat. "I mean, I know you'd said it was a possibility, but I suppose I assumed that you were just considering it, not that you were actually going to take it."

"Well given the debacle at Barton Street, I don't really have much choice, do I? It's either MS15 or I take my chances at yet another nick. And where would they put me this time? Stafford Row? Park Lane? Maybe I could go back to Catford and bring my career full circle." The initial elation she had felt walking out of MS15 headquarters was in serious danger of dampening given Viv's reaction. She knew that Frank wouldn't be pleased, but she had expected more from her friend. "I thought you might at least be happy for me."

"I am, of course I am but…well…what about Sun Hill?"

"What about it? I'm not going to get back there now, am I?"

"But the DI said right before I left to come and meet you that positive discussions were ongoing. I took that to mean that the top brass was seriously considering it."

"So, I'm supposed to just wait with bated breath to see if they take pity on me and take me back?" She stabbed her salad viciously. "Even if they said I could go back, I don't think I want to do that now."

"Why not? Burnside clearly wants you back."

Memories of her conversation with Frank, not to mention all the years they had worked together, came flooding back. "Of course he does. He wants things to be the way they were before we got married. He wants me there, right in his eyeline through his window, a few steps away from his desk where he can keep an eye on me, watch what I'm doing, make sure I don't step out of line and pull me back if I do."

"You make it sound like it was all bad."

"I don't mean it like that but…" she sighed. "It's hard to explain. When I started out at Catford, I was Stewart's wife. That was how I was introduced. 'This is Christina Lewis, Stewart Chruch's wife'. Then when he became DS it became even more of a thing, like a running joke about who wore the trousers at home. Then when he went to the Squad and I went to Sun Hill, it felt like a fresh start. I could just be me. Except I couldn't, because my marriage seemed to permeate every aspect of my working life there too. And then of course there was Frank and our affair and then becoming his wife…I couldn't see it at the time when Brownlow told me I had to go to Barton Street but, if I'd stayed, I would have been Frank's wife, and it would have been just the same as it had been all those years earlier.

"I don't think that's necessarily true…"

"You don't have to be nice about it, of course it would have been true. That's how everyone would have perceived me, coupled with the scandal of how we got there in the first place. Not to mention the fact that I'm not completely blind to certain aspects of Frank's personality. I know he gets a feeling of security from having me right there under his nose."

"You mean he controls you."

"No, not exactly, but…well maybe…I don't know." She put her fork down, struggling to articulate what she thought and felt, aware of what Viv's views had been in the past. It wasn't that she felt under Frank's control, given the idea had such negative connotations, but rather that, sometimes, it felt good to be free of his ever-watchful gaze, allowing herself to progress without wondering what he thought about her every move, every decision.

"I thought working together would have been part of the thrill, seeing each other every day…"

"It is, I mean…I liked working with him but, well I suppose now that we're married, it feels even more important to be doing something independent. I went to Barton Street under a cloud but, going to MS15, well, Reid picked me out of everyone else she could have considered."

"But Burnside doesn't want you to go there."

"No, because he thinks she's only offered me the job to get one over on him, or to fill my head with negativity about him, but I have to believe that it's because she knows I'm a good officer and that I'd do a good job." She sighed again. "I don't know if I'm making any sense here or not."

"You are," Viv replied supportively. "There's nothing wrong with wanting to break out from underneath him. Whether you like to admit it or not, you were a little twosome back in the day. I'm not saying you didn't learn things from him, we all have, but most people now chalk it up to him trying to get into your knickers rather than seeing any potential in you."

She shook her head at the vulgarity of it all, even if it was perhaps at least partly true. "And that's why I can't come back to Sun Hill, not now. The whispers would start again the moment I walked through the front door, and I want to be known for my own hard work and determination, not for having opened my legs for my boss, even if he is my husband."

"I thought you wanted to have a baby."

"I do, but nothing's happened on that front yet and I can't just put off the next step in my career in the hope that I'll fall pregnant. I suppose it'll happen when it's the right time."

"Well, for what it's worth, I think you're making the right decision," Viv sat back. "But I don't think he's going to like it."

"No," she agreed, picking up her fork again. "Probably not."

XXXX

On the drive home, he'd decided he would say nothing to her about the interview unless she brought it up. Perhaps it wasn't the right approach, but he knew no other that wouldn't potentially result in an argument. Besides, maybe actually going in and meeting with Reid had put her right off the idea. He was surprised, therefore, when he found the flat empty, so used as he had become to having her there when he arrived home of an evening. Her greeting him each day with, more often than not, the dinner almost ready, had spoken to the more traditional element of his nature, to his own upbringing, where a man was supposed to bring home the bacon and a woman was supposed to cook it.

Rooting around in the fridge, he was about to contemplate whether he would need to fend for himself when he heard the front door open and close. Moving back into the hallway, he found her standing, clutching a myriad of shopping bags, her face lighting up when she saw him.

"What's all this? I thought you were having lunch with Viv."

"I did, and then I went shopping for some new clothes." She dropped her wares and pulled a pale coloured suit out of the one of the bags, holding it up against herself. "What do you think?"

He felt his heart sink ever so slightly. "Very nice. So, you're taking the job then."

"Yes, I'm taking the job."

"And bugger what I think about it."

"With the best will in the world, Frank, it isn't up to you," she replied, walking away from him into the bedroom. "It's my decision at the end of the day what I do with my career, and I've decided that this is the best next step for me. I'm not asking you to like it, but I am asking you to respect my choice and if you can't…well then, our relationship isn't what it should be."

Following, he came upon her standing in front of the mirror, admiring her new purchase. "Meaning what?"

"Meaning I would always support you in whatever choice you made, and I would expect the same from you."

"Even if I don't agree with your choice?"

"Yes, because this is about me, not you. My working at MS15 isn't going to affect you, but it'll make my life a hell of a lot better and surely that's what you want."

"I want you to be happy."

"Really?"

"Of course! But forgive me for feeling that you coming back at Sun Hill would make you happy."

"And forgive me for telling you that it really wouldn't." She paused and turned to look at him. "I know it would make you happy and I don't regret one moment of what happened over the years I was there, the good and the bad. But it's time for me to move on to something new because I want to, not because I've been forced to. Can you understand that?"

"I suppose so," he admitted grudgingly. "But it's just…"

"It's just what?"

"It's not the same without you there. It hasn't been since the day you went to Barton Street. Something's missing."

"You mean I'm not there for you to boss around?"

"No," he said, "no, that's not it at all. I just feel like…" he shook his head, trying to find the right words. "I know I've got a good team there, but things are changing. New faces are going to be coming in and I'm not naïve enough to think that some of the others might not also decide to leave for their own personal reasons. Ted, Jim, Tosh…they're all loyal but…you're the only one I feel I can really trust. The only one I know for certain is on my firm, regardless of anything else."

Dropping the suit onto the bed, she moved towards him and slid her arms around his waist. "On your firm…"

"Call it stupid if you want, but it means something to me."

"I know it does." She met his gaze. "I have always been on your firm, even when you've thought I haven't been, and I always will be, whether I'm in Sun Hill CID or MS15. Working with Reid isn't going to change that. You should know that it doesn't matter what she might say to me about you."

"It mattered once. She persuaded you to dump me, remember?"

"That was then, and this is now. A lot of water's flown under the bridge since. I'm your wife. Doesn't that mean something?"

"Of course it does." He sighed heavily. "You've made me look a right prat in front of Meadows though. I've been lobbying him about you coming back and it's only been because of my efforts that Conway even agreed to it."

"Conway agreed?"

"Yes, Meadows told me today. All it would have taken was a nudge to Mr Brownlow and you'd have been back in the fold. Now I'm going to have to go back in and tell them you've said thanks, but no thanks."

""I'm sorry."

He looked at her carefully, taking in the shine in her eyes and the glow of her skin, and had to admit that she did look happy, happier than he'd seen her in a long time. "This is really what you want to do?" She nodded. "Well, far be it from me to stop you. I told you that afternoon in Pride Park you had the potential to go all the way. I just wasn't expecting you to do it with Kim Reid by your side."

"I couldn't have come as far as I have without you."

"Yeah, yeah, now you're just trying to sweeten me up."

"I mean it," she grew serious. "I told you that day in Pride Park that I'd never have been able to leave Stewart if it hadn't been for you. And leaving him was the catalyst for all of this. I sometimes wonder where I'd be if you and I had never acted upon how we felt." He slid his hand gently under her sweater, his fingers finding and then tracing the jagged scar at the base of her spine. "Don't," she said softly. "Don't think about that. It would all have come to a head some terrible way or another, regardless."

Pressing his forehead against hers, he kissed her gently, unwilling to let the dark thoughts permeate his brain too deeply. "You might want to move that new suit."

She frowned. "Why?"

"Because I doubt you want it covered in bodily fluids before you even get the chance to wear it."