Jaime was still digesting everything he and Tyrion had talked about just a few minutes ago, concerning what had happened in the weeks erased from his memory by the severe concussion that had been on the verge of killing him. Not having anything better to do, he recalled the whole conversation.
"Jaime!," Tyrion almost shouted. "Are you all right? How do you feel?," he barraged, getting close to the bed.
"Like I'm going to have a headache if you go on yelling," Jaime retorted with his trademark snark in his hoarse voice, and displaying a small smile. It was a pity he was so weak, or he would have crushed his little brother in an embrace. Tyrion seemed to sense his delicate condition and restrained himself from any physical contact which might be harmful to Jaime.
"I'm so glad to have my pain-in-the-ass brother back," Tyrion replied in return, with his eyes shining.
"I'm not sure I can say the same," Jaime added with a soft snort. It was so comforting to get back to their old bantering and joking around.
Then they smiled at each other knowingly, but Jaime became restless. "What's happened? Brienne's only told me that I abandoned her to come here, and Maester Kylan tells me that lots of things have changed. I'm sorry, but I can't remember anything beyond my stay at Winterfell. Would you mind updating me, given that no one else is very much inclined to do so?" He couldn't help the grimace that the pain of mentioning Brienne displayed on his face.
Tyrion sat down on one of the cots next to the bed. Jaime had noticed the presence of three cots surrounding his bed, and he surmised with no small degree of surprise that it meant that at least three people had been sleeping in his quarters. Tyrion in all probability was one of them, but could he dare to hope that Brienne was another? She'd been the one present in his quarters when he'd woken up. Would she have bothered if she hadn't cared one shit for him? She was the most selfless person he knew, but he'd betrayed her love and her trust. Had she done it just out of pity? Or because she still felt something for him? It would be too good to be true... He didn't deserve her, he'd never had, and doubted that he ever would.
"You remember what Bronn did back there, or anything beyond that point?," Tyrion asked, studying his eyes intently, probably searching for a sign that some flash of recovered memory had crossed his mind. But none came.
Jaime raised his eyebrows in puzzlement. "Bronn? What does he have to do with anything?"
"Cersei paid him to kill us, and he made the whole journey to the North. He found us at a tavern in Wintertown and threatened us with a crossbow. He also hit me in the nose with his best regards (that was extremely annoying) and revealed that our sweet sister had ordered him to kill us as well as Daenerys's officers, and that he intended to follow her orders unless we had something much better to offer him, like seemingly a castle like Highgarden, no less. Luckily for us, his greed knows no bounds, and he still trusted us to reward him with a more substantial reward than our snake sister. He also revealed that Cersei was preparing to launch an attack. Well, be that as it may, you looked perturbed after that episode in the tavern, and even in the middle of the madness of organizing Daenerys's contingent to depart for the upcoming war, I watched you, Jaime. You looked lost and conflicted. You'd told me in Wintertown that you'd decided to stay with Brienne, but I suspect that Bronn's news changed things for you. Anyway, I had to follow my queen. We sailed south and Euron's fleet caught us by surprise, sinking lots of our ships, killing Rhaegal and capturing Missandei. I believe that those great blows unhinged Daenerys definitely, and madness took hold of her, especially when Cersei had Missandei beheaded in front of her."
Then Tyrion recounted all that had happened during those terrible days and their aftermath. Varys's execution by dragon fire, Jaime's arrest, Tyrion securing his brother's escape with Cersei by boat and freeing him from the cell the Unsullied had put him in, Daenerys burning King's Landing, Tyrion and Jaime trying to stop the destruction futilely, Jaime returning to the Red Keep and almost dying when the ceiling of the tunnel where he and Cersei were in collapsed. Cersei had died then, and Tyrion rescued Jaime from the pile of bricks and rocks, keeping him hidden from Daenerys. But she charged Tyrion with high treason for helping an enemy to escape and had him thrown in a cell as well. Knowing that she loved Jon and probably trusted him still, Tyrion talked to Jon to persuade him to dispose of Daenerys because she had turned into a huge menace for the whole realm after the horror she'd bestowed upon the city, murdering brutally thousands of innocents. Jon stabbed her in the heart and that put an end to all the terror. Drogon melted the iron throne, took his mother's corpse and fled far from Westeros forever. Afterwards, Daenerys's remaining forces sentenced Jon to the Wall and he accepted his return to being a crow gladly. Most of the surviving Unsullied (among which Grey Warm was) and dothraki were done with Westeros and left it behind them, but others decided to stay. As for Euron's fate, he was found dead, and his fleet had scattered or sunk, no one knew exactly how. On another note, Tyrion had the idea to call for a gathering in which the heads of the remaining great houses would vote for the next sovereign, and surprisingly, or perhaps not so surprisingly, Bran was the elected one. He chose Tyrion as his Hand (as retribution for having subtly influenced the voters in his favor). On her part, Sansa demanded the independence of the North, and her demand was granted, so she became the Queen in the North. Bran requested Brienne for the position of Lady Commander of the Kingsguard, and she accepted, but she also proposed Pod for the Kingsguard, and the new king acquiesced. Bran was also changing the Kingsguard vows.
Jaime had listened attentively to the whole tale and still felt confused. "Brienne is very hurt. I broke her heart. But I'm sure I didn't did it because I chose Cersei over her, Tyrion. It doesn't make any sense to me. I'd already stopped loving Cersei that way and realized that Brienne is the one I love. I feel it. I know it. The only logical reason for my actions is that I must have done that to protect Brienne and to try to stop Cersei, to persuade her to end the war. Surely I was a stupid to believe that she whould listen to me, but I guess that I had to try. Otherwise, I have no other explanation for hurting Brienne so badly."
"Well, brother, you have a hard path ahead, if you wish to win Brienne back. You know how stubborn she is. But if it's any consolation to you, I don't believe she's fallen out of love for you, Jaime. Since she came to King's Landing, she's taking turns with the maester, myself and even Pod to look after you, a great effort on her part considering that she also carries out her duties as Lady Commander. So I'd say that she still cares a great deal," Tyrion encouraged with a shrug and a smile.
Jaime was deeply touched. "Thank you, brother, for being there for me, always."
Tyrion waved a dismissive hand. "You're welcome, but it's Brienne, and Pod, you should thank. I can tell that the lad has lent a hand for the sake of old times and because he regards Brienne as a mother figure. He's angry with you for having letf her and is of the opinion that you alone brought this upon yourself."
Jaime's face fell. "I'll apologize to the both of them. And if I could grovel, I would, but I'm afraid that in my current state, I can't do much more than barely lifting my arms."
Tyrion chuckled. "Who would've thought. My arrogant golden lion of a brother groveling."
Jaime's expression sombered. "Believe me, I've come a long way from that arrogant golden lion."
Tyrion nodded, also serious. "I believe you. Well, I have to go attend to my duties, but if you need anything from me, give me a holler."
"I will," Jaime assured.
Right when Tyrion was turning around to walk out of the chamber, his brother's next statement stopped him. "I love you, Tyrion."
Tyrion grinned. "I love you too, Jaime," he confessed without turning, and stepped into the hallway.
Yes, Jaime was very lucky to count on Tyrion's love and constant support, and it gave him a great comfort. But he couldn't help the emptiness that swallowed his heart when he thought of Brienne, heartbroken and believing that she'd only been second best to him.
Nothing further from the truth.
And the worst thing of being a convalescent from a coma was that his extreme weakness prevented him from getting up from the bed. He'd made an attempt, but the dizziness and the trembling of his limbs had forced him to lay down once again. Tiredness invaded him anyway, and fortunately for his sanity, he fell asleep. When his eyes opened again, it looked like the sun had set, because the room was dark. The maester brought him a light supper, and Jaime discovered that he was starving, but the maester warned him to eat carefully. His stomach had to get used to more regular and solid meals little by little, he said, and Jaime followed the instructions irritably, but followed them nonetheless. He didn't want to risk a step back in his recovery.
He fell asleep again and in the morning he felt much better and rested. After breakfast and the maester's examination, he was mentally preparing himself for another dull day, and wishing for someone to pay him a visit (he knew that it was too much to ask for Brienne dropping by, in his waking hours at least).
His wish was granted when King Bran no less crossed the door in his wheelchair, pushed by a servant. "Good morning, Ser Jaime," the teenager with those uncanny eyes said in greeting, in his voice without inflections.
"Good morning, Your Grace," Jaime greeted in return, instinctively trying to sit up completely. Maester Kylan had arranged the pillows so his upper body was semi-sitting.
"No, please, don't sit up for me. There's no need for so many formalities between us." Bran objected, and Jaime sank again into the pillows without protest. "If I still enjoyed such human traits like irony, I would point out the irony of this whole situation with some kind of joke, I suppose," the young king added without changing his neutral expression.
Jaime took some seconds to catch his interlocutor's meaning. "Oh. You refer to the fact that I've spent a month unconscious, just like you did when I threw you from that tower. And that I'm also a cripple. I lost the part of my body that I thought that defined me, my sword hand. Like you lost the use of your legs."
Bran nodded, and in that occasion Jaime believed to have seen a brief spark of humor in his dark eyes. "Humans are different and alike. And it's the knowledge of our similarities what humbles us, in the end. They certainly have humbled you, Ser Jaime. You've come a long way from the Kingslayer who pushed kids from towers for a toxic love." There was no trace of resentment or reproach in that serene voice. "And none of what has happened afterwards, none of this would have been possible if you hadn't done it, as I told you in Winterfell. Your sense of guilt tells a lot about you, but there's no need for it anymore. I don't need your guilt or your apologies. I forgave you a long time ago, Ser Jaime, so the matter is settled. I've come here with a request for you. You're free to reject it, of course."
Jaime felt strongly curious. "What is it, Your Grace?"
"My Kingsguard isn't complete yet, and if you feel inclined to become another member of it, I'd be honored," Bran offered, to Jaime's amazement. His jaw dropped.
"But... I was a terrible Kingsguard in the past," Jaime disagreed, though he had to admit that the propositon was extremely flattering.
Bran seemed to dismiss lightly his self-accusation. "You proved that the old vows are ineffective. I've increased the number of members and changed the vows, in a way that the protection of the realm and its subjects always comes first, if it clashes with my own protection. My people will always be more important than me. And you wouldn't have to sacrifice your whole life. You'd be free to marry and have a family, and you might quit any moment. The vows won't bind you for life. They're more like a contract," the king explained.
"I accept," Jaime found himself blurting out, very touched by Bran's generous offer. He didn't feel deserving of such an honor, but he wouldn't waste that chance.
And besides, you'll be able to be closer to Brienne, his small voice whispered in his ear.
He only hoped that her strong sense of honor would keep her from quitting at the news that he was going to join the institution. Or that she still harbored some love for him and didn't loathe the notion of having him close.
The king smiled subtly. "It's settled then. I wish you a fast recovery. Have a good day, Ser."
"Same for you, Your Grace," Jaime replied, still in wonder.
And just like that, the young man was aided out of the room, and Jaime felt lighter and happier for the first time since he'd regained his consciousness.
Now his only concern was the difficult issue of winning Brienne back.
Being honest to himself, he was sure that facing a hundred foes in battle would be easier, but he was still Jaime Lannister and he'd never run away from a challenge.