Projections

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"Did you want us for something, Kate?" Heyes asked as he and Kid stood in Kate's tiny study wondering why she was staring so intently at a blank computer screen.

Startled by the sound of his voice, Kate jumped slightly. "What?" she asked.

"You alright Kate? You look like you could use a beer," Kid told her.

"Oh, I'm fine. Really. I as just daydreaming."

"About us? Is that why we got summoned in here?"

"Oh, maybe sort of about you. It was more like...wondering what it would be like to live in your era."

"You mean without all them fancy gadgets?" Kid asked, then snorted. "You wouldn't last ten minutes."

Heyes snarled and Kid knew he was overstepping.

"Why don't you come find out?' Heyes suggested

"Oh no, I couldn't possibly do that," Kate replied.

"Why not? You write them stories about Kid and me all the time and you're always bringing strangers into those stories. Why not bring yourself into one?"

"You mean like...acting?"

"Why not?" Kid asked. "If them alter boys can do it..."

"Alter egos," Heyes corrected.

"Yeah, if they can do it, why not you?"

"I don't know how to act," Kate protested.

"Some say they don't either. Besides, how hard could it be?' Kid asked. "Alfred Hitchcock couldn't act."

"How do you know about Alfred Hitchcock?' Kate asked.

"Them alter boys. They was talking about their favorite movies and Heyes, I mean Pete said his favorite was something called Rear Window. And then he said Hitchcock does a walk-on in all his films. Kate, I've heard of a walk-off, but what's a walk on?"

"It's sort of like all the towns folks you see, but never talk to. They're all sort of doing a walk on, mingling about while the two of you carry the bulk of the story."

Kid looked at Heyes and rolled his eyes, still not understanding the meaning of a walk on.

"So let's get back to the possibility of you writing yourself into one of the stories about us," Heyes suggested.

"It would be nice to visit a simpler time..."

"Don't fool yourself about that, Kate. It ain't simpler. Sure, we don't have them writing machines, which means you got to write everything out by hand or maybe on a typewriter. Either way, it takes a lot longer to get a story told," Heyes told her. "In fact, it takes a lot longer to get most things done. Washing and drying clothes is an all day event. You want something to stay cold, you gotta go buy a chunk of ice at the General Store, then lug it all the way back to your house. If you want fruits and vegetables in the winter, you gotta can em yourself."

"You can buy canned tomatoes, beans, and peaches in the stores now, Heyes," Kid corrected.

"The point is, everything takes a lot longer than it does in your day," Heyes replied.

"There's a few things that ain't changed too much," Kid said with a grin. "Acts of nature so to speak."

"Maybe it would be best if you didn't speak, Kid," Heyes advised.

"I would love to visit some of those old western towns," Kate said with a soft, dreamy tone to her voice. "Meet some poor lonesome cowboy, maybe ride through the desert on a horse with no name..."

Heyes and Kid again exchanged confused looks, wondering what exactly Kate was rambling on about.

"Why wouldn't you name your horse?' Kid finally asked.

Kate shook off her melancholy musings. "Just daydreaming again," she told him.

"So, you gonna write yourself into a story?" Heyes asked.

"I don't know what kind of a character I'd be," Kate replied.

Kid smiled. "Oh, you would definitely be a character alright. Maybe 'Calamity Kate,' riding all across the west on some no name horse."

"Kid, be serious," Heyes told him. "Now let's see... When you're daydreaming, how do you picture yourself?"

Kate sighed."Dull," she replied. "Probably some scrub farmer's wife."

"Who gets a visit by two notorious outlaws!" Heyes exclaimed. "You could have Kid shot and near death..."

HEYES!" Kid interrupted. "Just once. Just once, let Heyes be the one that gets shot, Kate. Please, I'm begging you."

Kate shook her head but otherwise ignored Kid's comment. "Alright, let's assume I am some scrub farmer's wife and you two arrive at my desolate cabin seeking help. Then what?"

"You nurse Heyes back to health and fall in love with me, just like all your other stories," Kid replied.

"Am I really that shallow?" Kate asked. "Do I really lack all sense of creativity?"

"No," Heyes quickly replied, trying to reassure her. "It's more like you've found a formula that works and you take advantage of it."

"Over and over again," Kid said and caught sight of the threatening glare of his partner.

Kid shrugged. "Well, you gotta admit, if her stories don't have me wounded or held prisoner, they have me outright dying."

Heyes sighed, closed his eyes, and shook his head.

"Kid's right," Kate told him. "I would have to come up with totally new and creative idea and to tell you the truth, I'm not sure I can do that. You know there are only seven basic story plots, and every story ever written is based on one of those seven plots."

"Well, let's go over them and see if there's one you've missed," Heyes suggested.

Kate sighed but nodded agreeably. "The first is over coming a monster."

"A monster? You mean like a dragon or a ghost or something?" Kid asked.

"Well, it could be a realistic monster, like Danny Bilson."

"Okay, so that's been done. What's next?' Heyes asked.

"Rags to riches,"

"Also done," Kid said. "All the banks we've robbed. Of course our stories are more like rags to riches to rags again."

"Tell us another one," Heyes prodded.

"The quest," Kate replied.

"Amnesty," Heyes and Kid replied in unison.

"There's voyage and return," she said and watched both boys shake their heads.

"Been there, done that," Heyes replied.

"Comedy?"

"Well, that might be a possibility. What else?"

"Tragedy."

"You've way overdone that one," Kid said.

"Rebirth?"

"You mean like having twins?" Kid asked, then smiled. "You could be the sod buster's wife having twins!"

"I think rebirth is more like a life changing epiphany," Kate explained.

"Epiphany?" Kid asked.

"Life changing realization. Like the two of you realizing the days of the successful outlaw were coming to a close."

Heyes sighed. "I see what you mean about having covered just about everything. And I don't see much comedy in being a sod buster's wife. That's hard work.

Kate nodded. "I think I'd better stick with what I know," she said.

"And we all know what she knows best," Kid said, feeling very defeated.

"Now Kid, it don't mean she's gonna hurt you none. She's written a story or two where you've walked away without a scratch."

"I think you mean I've walked away without no visible scratch," Kid replied.

"Give her a little time, Kid. She'll come up with something. Maybe a nice romance for you."

"Along with a nice bath," Kid added with some exuberance.

Suddenly Kate brightened and smiled. "I've got it! Kid, have you ever been ice skating, or parachuting, or zip lining?"

This time Kid closed his eyes and shook his head.

"Here we go again."