Christmas With the Outlaws
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Kate woke and while still lying in bed, glanced out the window to see a steady thick snow falling and weighing down the branches of the trees. A perfect Christmas morning, she thought as she snuggled down into the warm down comforter and stretched one arm out to locate her still snoozing beagle curled up beside her on top of the covers. She glanced at the clock on the dresser across the room. It was nearly eight and there was work to be done before family arrived to open gifts and enjoy a Christmas feast.
Tossing back the covers, Kate left Murphy the Beagle still sleeping and headed down the hall to shower, dress in something festive, and make herself presentable. An hour later she and Murphy were headed downstairs to take care of the first item of business, a trip out into the back yard for Murphy to explore and race around the yard and discolor several spots in the freshly fallen snow.
Returning to the house, Kate filled Murphy's food dish as he raced around the kitchen in eager anticipation. Once he was happily chomping his kibbles, Kate lit the gas on the stove to warm the kettle for a much-needed cup of coffee.
"Look at you all dolled up in a…, what exactly do you call that thing you're wearing?" Kid Curry asked and Kate groaned without the least bit of guilt.
"It's called an Ugly Christmas Sweater, and what are the two of you doing her so early? Don't you know this is Christmas?"
"That's why we're here," Heyes explained, bending down to pet the beagle who was sniffing something on the bottom of Heyes' boot.
"No, no, no, no, no. Christmas is the one day of the year that I give my undivided attention to family. I give you boys three hundred and sixty-four days of the year. This day I have to focus on feeding twenty people who are going to be arriving in less than three hours," Kate bemoaned.
"Why don't you let us help," Heyes suggested and sat down at the table across from her. "Kid and me are great fireside cooks. What are you serving?"
"We do a carry-in and I'm responsible for the…." She hesitated to tell him as she knew they would swear to know the best recipe known to man.
"Responsible for the what?" Kid asked.
Kate plopped her elbow on the table and rested her forehead in her palm. "The cowboy chili," she said with a heavy sigh.
"Kate you just sit back, take it easy and enjoy your morning," Kid told her. "I'll go start a fire out back."
"No!" she exclaimed, then took a moment to gather some composure. "No thank you. That won't be necessary, Kid. I make it in a crockpot."
"A cracked pot? Why" Kid asked.
"Not a cracked pot, a crockpot. It's a… a slow cooker and I just brown the meat and then put everything into the crockpot and add some spices and let the crockpot do all the rest."
"Well, if I start a fire I can at least brown the meat for you. Do you use bear, deer, or antelope?"
"None of the above. I just use plain old, dependable ground beef."
"What's ground beef? Is that like roadkill?' Kid asked.
"No, it's like… what you would use in a meatloaf."
"Oh, I get it. That's like beef you put through a grinder. I remember seeing my ma do that when she was making a mincemeat pie."
Kate nodded and reached across the table for the instant coffee. "That's right, but I buy it at the grocery and it's already ground."
Kate scooped a large teaspoon of the instant coffee and plopped it into her cup, then reached behind her for the whistling kettle. As she poured the hot water into her cup, she noticed two sets of wide eyes staring at the steaming brown liquid filling her cup.
"There are coffee cups in that cupboard if you boys want some coffee," she told them and returned the kettle to the stovetop.
"We've never seen coffee like that before," Kid explained. "Heyes can make his coffee that makes your hair stand on end and I can make a decent, mellow cup, all depending on how much of them little ground up flakes you put in a cup!" he exclaimed.
"That's right," Kate replied. "Go ahead and try it while the water is still hot."
Kid pulled two cups from the shelf and handed one to Heyes who scooped three teaspoons of the instant coffee into his cup. Kid took his cue from Kate and scooped one teaspoon into his cup. Kate reached again for the kettle and poured the water into each of their cups and Kid sat down at the table with Kate and his partner.
"You know, Kid mentioning his ma making mincemeat pie is sort of why we're here," Heyes said as he took a sip of his coffee and winced at how strong and bitter he had made his drink. Kid saw the reaction and smiled broadly.
"Hair on the back of your neck standing up?" Kid asked.
"As a matter of fact, it's perfect," Heyes replied.
"You were saying something about why you're here?" Kate asked, hoping to resolve whatever imaginary dilemma the two outlaws were experiencing and get them on their way before her company started arriving.
"Lemme ask you something, Kate. Have your ever read Charles Dickens story called 'A Ghost of Christmas?'" Heyes asked.
"Of course. Everyone's read that. It's a classic, and it's come to be more commonly known as 'A Christmas Carol.'"
"Well, I just read it for the first time. In fact, I read it out loud to the Kid 'cause he likes listening to books more than reading them."
"In this day and age, we actually have what is called audio books. In fact, I have a couple of Westerns written by a man named Max Brand that are read by a wonderful actor with a beautiful, rich, deep voice," Kate said with a far-away look in her eyes.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Kid replied. "Go on Heyes, finish what you was saying," Kid said, brushing off Kate's comment with a swipe of his hand.
"Well, it got me and Kid to thinking about the fact that, us being what you call fictional characters and never really aging…. Well, we know our past and we know our present more or less but… but we're never gonna know our future."
"And then we thought of you!" Kid exclaimed.
"Me? Why?"
"Because you are the future, and because you write them stories about me and Heyes, so of course you would know our future. You're like the Ghost of Christmas Future!" Kid nearly shouted gleefully.
"That's why you're here? You want me to tell you your future?"
"Exactly!" Kid said and gave Heyes a 'there, I said it. It's out in the open' nod of his head.
"You do seem like the most logical choice," Heyes said. "By the way, do you have some milk or cream?"
"In the refrigerator," Kate replied while contemplating the depth of their request.
"I do believe your eyebrows are standing on end," Kid teased but reached behind him and swung open the refrigerator door in search of the milk.
Kate glanced at the wall clock and realized she had to get the chili started. "You two sit tight right here while I do a little work in here," she told them and rose from her chair to heat a frying pan. "Now, about this request. I'm not sure I can answer your question for you."
"Why not?" Heyes asked.
Kate took a package of ground beef from the refrigerator and dumped the meat in the frying pan, then used a fork to break up the meat as it sizzled and browned.
"Well, because there are so many writers and each one writes your past, present, and future to their own liking. I could probably be able to tell you how I see your future, but it likely wouldn't be the same as all the other writers."
"But wouldn't Kid and me have the option of choosing which future we want to settle on? I mean didn't Ebeneezer Scrooge have the chance to change how his future ended up after hearing how his life would end up if he didn't change his ways?" Heyes asked.
Kate nodded. "He did," she replied.
"And Heyes and me have already changed our ways," Kid reminded her. "I mean we ain't robbin banks and trains no more."
"So, don't all you writers have to acknowledge that we're gonna end up better off than we would have if we hadn't decided to seek an amnesty?" Heyes asked.
Again, Kate nodded and carried the pan of meat to the sink to drain before dumping it into the crockpot. "Generally speaking, I suppose that's right."
"So, I think what Heyes and me really wanna know is if we're ever gonna see our golden years and just how golden are they gonna be," Kid told her.
Kate dumped the meat into the crockpot and began adding the other ingredients. "It's a complicated issue, but I'm quite confident that many of the writers have and will write you both some wonderful golden years and, like Heyes said, there's no reason why the two of you can't choose which of the many options provided by all the writers you want to elect as your choice in life."
Kid smiled triumphantly. "There, you see Heyes, I told you Kate would have the answer!"
"I think Heyes had it figured out before me, Kid," Kate replied. "I think you both just needed a confirmation of his idea."
Kid yawned heavily. "You know, we ain't had any sleep for two days 'cause we've been stewing over this question.
"I tell you what, Kid. You can have my room and Heyes can use the guest room and you can both get a good long rest while I deal with all the company that's coming over. Once they've gone home, the three of us can have a nice, quiet Christmas together. I'll save you some chili and Christmas cookies and talk about whatever you like. How does that sound?"
"Well, Heyes' reading to me always puts me to sleep. Do you think I could listen to one of them Max Brand talking books you was telling us about?"
Kate smiled and wondered if Kid would recognize the voice of his alter-ego. "I think that sounds like a fine idea! Let me give this a stir and we'll get you both all settled in for a good night, or rather a good day's sleep."
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Late in the afternoon the guests all over-stuffed with food and wine, began making their exits to head over to the in-laws for another coma inducing feast, and Murphy began happily enjoying his task of shredding all the balls of discarded wrapping paper strewn about the living room floor. Kate uttered a sigh of relief and loaded the dishwasher before waking her two favorite cowboys.
"Did you enjoy those talking books?" Kate asked Kid as she filled two bowls with cowboy chili and set them on the kitchen table for her imaginary guests.
"What little I heard was good but that fella reading em lulled me right to sleep."
Kate smiled. "He does have a wonderful voice, doesn't he?" she remarked. "He reads me to sleep almost every night."
Kid gave Heyes a wary glance. "You listen to the same book every night? You need to expand your literary library," Kid replied.
"This coming from a man who hasn't read anything other than a train timetable in over a century," Heyes quipped.
Kate plopped a plate of Christmas cookies on the table and offered them both a glass of wine.
"Rather have a beer if you got one," Kid told her as Heyes nodded in agreement.
Kate reached into the refrigerator and pulled out the last two cans of beer that Uncle Frank had been too inebriated to locate. She handed them each a can and sat down at the table to recover from the day's activities.
"Well, now that you've had time to think about it, did I answer your questions to your satisfaction?" she asked and reached for the last gingerbread man on the plate.
As she raised the cookie to her mouth, Kate's eyes fell upon a now very indignant blond cowboy. "Something wrong?" she asked.
"You're gonna eat that?" Kid asked.
Kate looked at the cookie and then at Kid and suddenly remembered his passion for gingerbread.
"Oh…. Sorry," she said and sadly passed the cookie across the table. "I forgot how much you like gingerbread."
"And people wonder why we still call him Kid," Heyes said with a roll of his eyes. "And to answer your question Kate, yes you did. Kid and me are confident that, despite all the troubles we've had and all the troubles that lie ahead until we get our amnesty, our projected futures look promising, thanks to all you writers."
"So, you're ready to be on your way?" she asked.
"Unless you've got more of these cookies stashed away somewhere," Kid replied.
Kate yawned. "I'm out of gingerbread, but I'll put all these cookies in a bag and you can take them with you," she told him.
Murphy appeared in the doorway with his mouth firmly clamped around a full roll of unused wrapping paper. Seeing Kid with a cookie in his hand, Murphy dropped the wrapping paper and ran over and leaped into the Kid's lap.
"You're not real committed to dog training, are you?" Kid asked and handed the beagle half of his cookie.
"It's Christmas Kid. Even a dog is entitled to a few presents."
Heyes shook his head. "Come on Kid. It's been a long day and Kate's obviously tired. We should be going."
Kid scooted Murphy off his lap, then stuffed his pockets with the remaining cookies.
"You go listen to one of them talkin' books, Kate. That fella will put you right to sleep."
"I intend to do just that, Kid."
"We hope you had a Merry Christmas, Kate," Heyes said as the two former outlaws slowly faded away.
"You too," she told them.
"We'll see you for New Years!" a voice sounding reminiscent of the talking books resounded in the faraway distance of her thoughts.
Kate reached into her pocket for the gingerbread cookie she had stashed away for herself. "I'm counting on that, Kid," she said with a weary but contented smile.