"There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in a storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man." - Kvothe
Chapter Twenty-Eight: Consequences
The rest of that day went by in silence.
Naofumi said nothing as he held onto Filo's reins. His party was likewise acting subdued in the back of the wagon, not saying a word.
With this being the northern part of the country, Naofumi recognized a few of the places where they had helped out. Towns where he used to set up shop as the Nocturnal Doctor. Places where he'd healed a lot of sick people. Now here he was again, openly parading through them as the Shield Hero.
He didn't care.
He only came to do his job as a Hero and move on.
The silence would be broken as they approached another village. The air would fill with the sounds of fighting and screaming, as well as the beating of wings and the screeches of bats.
Naofumi and his allies were quick to rescue those in danger and gathered them in a fortified part of town. Ren's strategy proved to be sound, as grouping everyone together in an easily defendable place made it much simpler to not only protect them but also deal with the familiars much more quickly and efficiently.
In some towns, they found no sign of any familiars. Instead, they found some of Mirellia's knights, resting up after fighting off the latest wave of bats along with wounded villagers cowering in fear in a town hall or some other large structure.
The Shield Hero treated those who'd been wounded as quickly and efficiently as possible. Then, after ensuring that no more familiars were left in the area, he would continue on, always heading for the next village. Quick, and efficient. No grandiose displays of power. Only what was needed to get the job done.
The Shield Hero's party traveled all day. Fighting, running, looking, fighting some more. The only breaks they took were to eat. But instead of cooking himself like he usually did, Naofumi had his weapon automake the food to save time through the same system that allowed him to craft average quality potions and medicines in bulk, regardless of the quality of the ingredients that went into it.
Filo wasn't humming happily like she normally did whenever she was pulling her favorite carriage. Neither Raphtalia nor Eclair complained about the insane speeds that they were forced to endure. Dou-Lon sat in his corner of the wagon, unmoving. Doing nothing until they stopped to fight or help out, and when they were done, he went back to his corner like a cat that'd been told off for doing something wrong.
Naofumi didn't care though. His party either needed to toughen up or go home. Plenty of people had already died today. It was their job to prevent that number from going any higher.
If they couldn't handle this, then they weren't worthy of helping him out.
So they continued under Filo's insane speeds, going from place to place.
…
When night finally came, Naofumi saved their current location and portaled his party back to their village.
A quick check in the forest by Dou-Lon revealed no signs of the familiars. It looked like evacuating everyone had been the right call. If there had been any familiars that hatched in the forest after they left, it was likely that they'd flown off, seeking greener pastures elsewhere. Greener pastures where the knights and the other Heroes would be ready to handle them.
However, Naofumi barely took note of that piece of good news from the Hakuko. His general demeanor didn't change at all.
He didn't compliment Raphtalia or the others for their good work. He only had his weapon automake some more food. The Shield Hero then set it on the table for them and went outside to eat his portion of the weapon's average tasteless junk by himself.
The inside of his home had never felt more subdued.
...
After he ate, he wondered if he should go straight to bed or if he should go to the forest and see if he could find a balloon monster there that he could use as a makeshift punching bag.
While he was contemplating this, Ren appeared in front of his home in a flash of light alongside his party. Upon seeing Naofumi, the Sword Hero left his group and ran up to the Shield Hero.
"Hey Naofumi, are you… are you feeling any better?" He asked warily.
Naofumi raised an eyebrow at him. Ren shuffled awkwardly in place. "I'm sorry I didn't ask sooner. It's just that, well, I didn't know you were going through panic attacks too, and um, I've been-"
"Why do you care?"
...
Ren looked caught off guard by the crass statement. "Is… is there a reason why I shouldn't?" He honestly asked. "I'm your friend, and yet I didn't realize that you were hurting-"
"My friend…? Hah! Don't make me laugh." Naofumi rolled his eyes. "How about you go focus on your own issues instead, you stupid chuuni."
"What are you- why does- what's going on with you Naofumi?" Ren asked, looking beyond confused and even a little hurt. "Look, I'm sorry that we didn't try talking to you earlier. I thought you'd want some space after what happened. I know I usually prefer space in those situations. I didn't want to make you feel worse by-"
"Why don't you leave me alone then?" Naofumi stood up, glaring at the Sword Hero. "I'd feel a lot better if you stopped wasting my time."
Something in that glare made Ren freeze up.
"You want to know what's going on with me?" Naofumi poked the dark-haired boy in the chest. "I'll tell you. I'm absolutely tired of you and the stupid act that you put up. You pretend to be all confident and calm when the situation calls for it when you're nothing but a walking ball of anxiety trying to play hero. You want to help me? Get real, you can barely even help yourself."
"But... I'm not-" Ren shook his head, feeling a dark chill go down his spine. "Naofumi, seriously, what's going on with you? Why are you being so mea-"
"Oh and nice job taking charge of everyone yesterday." Naofumi laughed sarcastically. "Not that you did a good job, of course, since a bunch of people still died. And what was it with you waiting till the end to use that move of yours, huh? Did you want to wait till everyone was desperate before showing off? Or were you too greedy to waste that amazing accessory I made for you on something as mundane as saving people from trash mobs?"
"..." Ren stared speechlessly at the Shield Hero. His blue eyes wide.
"Oh, and if I see you bossing Raphtalia or Filo around again I'll break your &^%$ing legs, got it? They're my party members, not yours." Naofumi stated coldly.
"I… I was only trying to help…" Ren whispered. He was visibly shaking.
"Well guess what, I don't want your help. Stop trying to insert yourself into my problems. It's not cool."
"Oh, and we're not friends. I'm just the guy that's supposed to make sure you don't get yourself killed on the battlefield. Nothing more."
...
The Sword Hero's shoulders sunk. Naofumi directed his glare at Ren's party members as well, making them take a step back. Finally, feeling like he'd said his piece, the Shield Hero turned around and walked back into the house.
He didn't look back to see Ren slowly shuffle away. Ignoring his friends who tried to comfort him. He tuned out what the dog girl said, and how Ren ignored even her as the depressed boy shuffled towards his house.
Actually, now that he thought about it, Naofumi didn't care if those two got together anymore. As he'd come to learn, romance, friendship, and all that other assorted crap had no place in a world like this one and only acted as distractions towards their actual goal.
The sooner Ren and the others learned that, the better.
That night, he went straight to bed.
He didn't acknowledge Raphtalia when she came in. He didn't say anything when she laid on her bed and started to cry when he didn't give her a good night hug. A good night kiss. A good night cuddle. Just… nothing.
He almost told her to be quiet or to sleep somewhere else if all she was going to do was cry... But he couldn't deny that a part of him hurt doing this to her.
Even though he was angry, he still loved her. At least, he thought he did. Was it really love if he was going out of his way to hurt her and the others?
But was it also love to let her and everyone else walk all over him?
…
He scowled and put his pillow over his head to drown out her crying.
Raphtalia had to learn to grow up and act her age. Or else, she'd never be useful for any fight. He had to do this for her sake… right?
Eventually, his fatigue finally caught up to him, and he fell asleep.
For once, his sleep held no dreams or nightmares whatsoever. Only a silent, empty, endless black void.
The memory of it still persisted even after he woke up, making him feel just as empty inside.
The next two days passed like the first.
Traveling, fighting, traveling, healing, looking, traveling, pausing for a quick lunch, more fighting, traveling, nothing…
Each day saw Naofumi and his party coming back to the village later and later. He pushed Filo and his party to their very limits so they could get a hand over the familiars.
Those knights that Mirellia hadn't taken with her on her trip to Siltvelt were finally making more headway protecting the towns. They'd also begun going out into the wilderness, burning the bodies of any monsters they found, significantly reducing the numbers of the familiars.
Because the situation in Melromarc was finally somewhat under control, Naofumi and the other Heroes had begun helping out Mirellia's allies outside Melromarc. The Shield Hero was currently in a small country up north, dealing with the familiars there. It was probably the one Itsuki had helped out in the past, but Naofumi didn't know, nor did he care.
Naofumi should have been proud of how quickly Filo had traveled that distance. They'd managed to save the lives of many people and slain even more familiars. Absorbing the bat-types and the yeti-types into his shield unlocked more shields. And separated from the other Heroes, the familiars provided a good source of Exp almost comparable to what they received on Cal Mira, giving them a few levels.
Not only that, Raphtalia had listened to him. No longer did she stand near Naofumi to try and protect him from the weak monsters, but instead she raced off ahead to rescue those who couldn't fight with the tip of her blade while he used his skills to protect her and those she rescued.
Yet Naofumi was grim. He said no words of congratulation, no words of comfort. He only fought and he saved. He healed and he gave. And then, when orders were given, he went to where he was needed. Leaving Raphtalia to grieve over the mistakes she'd made.
He didn't say anything to those who thanked them for what they'd done. He didn't answer any questions about how the Bow Hero was doing. He merely brushed off their praise and forced Filo to continue running on when their work in an area was finished.
For once, Raphtalia didn't speak up to call him out on his blatant rudeness.
In fact, since they were outside Melromarc now, she and the others couldn't understand what the people were saying at all since they spoke a different language.
Not that Naofumi cared, since his auto-translation function helped him out just fine and there was no need for anyone else to talk.
…
As night came on again, Naofumi teleported himself and his party back to the front of his house. It was very late. There were probably only a few hours left until the sun would rise. Everyone was exhausted.
Looking to the side, he saw the Sword Hero's house was dark.
Ren hadn't tried talking to him since that first night. In fact, he hadn't heard anything from the Sword Hero at all. It was almost like Ren was trying to avoid him.
It suited Naofumi just fine. The less interaction he had with the other Heroes, the better. Even after a few days, it barely felt like his anger towards the world and everyone in it had cooled. He still had as of yet to get a damn balloon for a punching bag too.
Before he could walk inside, however, Itsuki ran out of his home.
"Naofumi, there you are, have you seen Motoyasu?!" He asked frantically.
"No, I'm too busy to care about what that simp is doing." Naofumi crossed his arms and scowled. He hadn't turned the other way to see there had been candlelight still coming out of Itsuki's bedroom window.
"Naofumi…" The Bow Hero sighed. "Naofumi, I should have asked this sooner, but is everything ok? I tried to ask Ren if he'd talked to you, but he wouldn't even tell me what happened between you two."
"Tch." Naofumi clicked his tongue in annoyance. "I swear, if one more person asks me how I'm feeling, I'll have to equip my Cursed Series to properly express my anger."
"You… you don't mean that, do you?" Itsuki asked in shock.
...
Naofumi clicked his tongue in annoyance once again and turned around to walk inside his home. Itsuki, however, was quick to recover from his shock.
"Wait, Naofumi!" The Bow Hero grabbed him by the wrist. "Fine, I won't try to pry about how you're doing. But are you sure you haven't seen Motoyasu?"
"No. I haven't seen that idiot since our briefing at the castle." Naofumi harshly pulled his hand away. He turned to go towards his door. "Now piss off, I'm tired, and-"
"But Ren hasn't seen him either." Itsuki kept pressing on.
"So?! Why should I care?!" Naofumi asked harshly, turning around to face Itsuki with a deep scowl on his face. "Tell me, why should I give one god damn ^%$# about the rest of you morons?!"
...
Itsuki looked stunned at Naofumi's tone. The reason why Ren had looked so down... it became all too apparent what Naofumi had said to the Sword Hero.
Itsuki's face hardened. "Look, Naofumi, I know I haven't been perfect."
"That's the understatement of the century." Naofumi rolled his eyes sarcastically.
Itsuki glared at the Shield Hero. "I'm just worried about our friend, I'm worried about how everyone is holding up, and it's not helping it when you're being such an &^%&^%$ to everyone! Because of what you said, Ren is now refusing to talk to me or anyone else?! I've never seen him so depressed since the day we were summoned here! Seriously, the way you're acting right now is making me want to punch you in the face!"
"Try it. Punch me. See if I care." Naofumi crossed his arms. "You'll probably hurt your hand, you prideful bastard." Itsuki looked like he'd been slapped by that statement. The Shield Hero had completely ignored his comment about their fellow Hero.
"You… You…" Itsuki's hands clenched and unclenched.
"After all, that seems to be the only thing this stupid shield is good for." Naofumi scowled at the legendary weapon attached to his arm. He then glared at Itsuki again. Now that he thought about it, he hadn't been able to properly express his frustrations with the Bow Hero yet, hadn't he? The blonde kid looked pretty pissed at Naofumi's behavior.
"What's wrong? Are you gonna whip out that fancy bow of yours and murder a few more innocent people to prove me wrong?" Naofumi asked. "Or are you going to go cry into the arms of your green-haired mommy again about how things didn't go your way? Are you going to look for comfort from your friends instead of dealing with the fact that you're just a murderer who can't stop-"
"JUST STOP!" Itsuki screamed.
…
He breathed in deeply. "I didn't come over for this, I just… I felt we were too harsh on Motoyasu at the meeting. I said some hurtful things to him, and..." Itsuki sighed, his shoulders slumping in defeat. "I'm just worried about him… … I thought you'd be worried about him too." Itsuki's face hardened again.
"Well, I'm not. Knowing him, that simp is probably off saving some damsel in distress right about now." Naofumi turned around again to walk into his house. "If you're so worried about him, then go do something about it. You have a great track record of going out by yourself and solving problems after all. Just try to keep the body count low this time, ok? It's a pain in the #$ to bury all your victims every time."
"... Fine…" Itsuki turned around and walked away.
Naofumi scowled deeply. Looking up at the window, he saw Filo looking at him sadly. But as soon as he glared at her, she ran away to hide.
Why did the others care about what that idiot was going through? Motoyasu wouldn't even trust them enough to share his strengthening methods with them! They could have had a way easier time than they already did if that simp would just share how he made his weapon stronger. But no, he just had to be the world's biggest idiot.
It was so utterly stupid. If he was just going to keep on being useless, Naofumi hoped he'd just walk off a cliff. That'd make their job a lot easier, and…
Urgh. No, if he died, then the waves would become stronger. Naofumi's scowl deepened. Even with his damn uselessness, Motoyasu couldn't be allowed to die. It was completely and utterly stupid! Why couldn't they have had a more competent Spear Hero summoned!? One that wouldn't have allowed Bitch to live and make them all suffer with her evil presence in their lives!
Looking at the Spear Hero's empty house, he almost felt tempted to bring out the Cursed Series just so he could burn it down. But it was at that thought that he finally reined in his anger.
He'd let himself be angry. He'd lash out at others. But not to the point where he'd seriously bring out that series. If he equipped it now, who knew how long it'd be until he took it off again. And at his level, who knew just how much destruction he'd cause while it was on.
The fact that it was his only way to actually attack and damage anything at all pissed him off too. Why couldn't his damn Shield of Hope be used for attacking? Was it any wonder he hadn't been using it lately?!
What a useless shield...
Raphtalia was quiet in her bed tonight, so he thought he'd be able to fall asleep more easily.
Yet he couldn't. The fact that she wasn't crying made him focus on her more.
The half-tanuki wasn't crying in her sleep. He could tell by the way her breath hitched every now and then. She was still awake, staring up at the ceiling, just like him. She was trying to hold her tears in until she was sure that he was asleep so she wouldn't bother him.
It was… horrifying for him to realize. It unsettled him so greatly that he couldn't sleep.
'Am I really alright with being like this? Do I want to be angry at everyone and everything?'
The guilt inside him was even greater now than before. He'd said his piece to his party, and now, instead of feeling good about finally getting all that stuff off his chest… he felt … bad. It was like he had to continually lash out at others to feel better, and it only made him feel worse every time he came down from it...
But he couldn't let them walk all over him any longer! They needed to realize that he was human! That he had feelings too! That he didn't want their pity because he couldn't attack! That… that…
But couldn't he have done so in a better way? Couldn't he have sat everyone down to talk about what was bugging him? Couldn't he have practiced better communication skills with everyone instead of bottling it up until he couldn't take it anymore?... did he have to take away their right to smile…?
…
Gods, Itsuki was right. He really had turned into an &^%$#%^.
Still, he couldn't just forgive them! They needed to hear what he had to say! Otherwise, they'd just walk all over him again, turn him into their personal butler, and then where would he be?! They'd be smiling, but what about him!?
No, it was better like this! With no distractions in the way, they'd done far better saving others. By focusing entirely on defense and grabbing all the monster's attention with Hate Reaction, it was easier for everyone else to focus on what mattered. Saving the lives of others, and not him.
And yet he'd made Ren regress into a depressed teenager. He'd likely burned away his friendships with Itsuki and Motoyasu. He was treating his girlfriend and daughter like &^%$, and that was only the tip of the iceberg that he could see. How could he possibly justify his behavior?
Oh well. None of that mattered. Saving people was what mattered. Being weak and complacent would only lose lives, so he could no longer do that. He had to save everyone else…
Even if they could no longer smile at him...
…
…
...
Knock Knock Knock!
"Naofumi! Naofumi!"
The Shield Hero groaned. He hadn't managed to fall asleep at all. And hearing Itsuki's frantic voice outside only made him more annoyed.
Didn't that prideful little snot get the message earlier? Perhaps Naofumi needed to be a little harsher with him.
Dressed in only his nightclothes, he went downstairs and answered the door. "What do you want now-"
"Motoyasu's headed for the country of the Spirit Tortoise!" Itsuki screamed.
…
…
...
"W-What?" Naofumi asked, finally having his anger kicked out of his mind as it tried to process what the Bow Hero had told him.
Itsuki quickly explained. He'd gone over to Motoyasu's house to check to see if he was back or not. However, just like the last few times, he hadn't been there. He'd opened the door and checked his room and his party members' rooms but found no signs of them.
He'd been about to give up and leave, but then he'd noticed moonlight coming in through the window, reflecting off a crumpled piece of paper lying under the table. He'd opened it, finding it was a note from Motoyasu. And…
"He wrote that he couldn't just leave it up to our gaming knowledge! He's going ahead to deal with it!" Itsuki finished frantically.
A part of the Bow Hero wondered why such an important note had been crumpled up and tossed under the table. But he couldn't dwell on that now. Naofumi didn't ask about that either as he took the note to read it over himself. The note, however, turned out to be a surprisingly long letter.
To Naofumi, Itsuki, and Ren.
If you guys are reading this, then I want you to know that I'm sorry about our argument at the castle. I'm sorry about a lot of things, actually. I could probably fill a book with the things I need to apologize to you three for.
You're right about some things. I care more about girls than I perhaps should. Maybe that did play a part in why things went so wrong that night? I don't know. But you should at least know something.
I'm not certain if I've mentioned it before or not, but my Curse is the curse of Envy. To put it simply, I'm jealous of you guys. All three of you managed to become so strong and talented whereas me… I'm still weak. Fighting alongside you guys that night, I saw that even with all of my hard work, I hadn't caught up to you one bit. Guess that's what I get for being such an idiot at the start of our adventure, huh?
Joking aside, you guys may be right about the methods. Perhaps sharing them is the path to ultimate power. But as of right now, I'm still too hesitant to admit this to your faces. Or maybe I'm just afraid that if I share my methods, you all will grow even stronger, while I'll remain just as weak and unimportant as I am now.
That's a stupid excuse. I know it is. But at the same time, I just can't overcome these feelings of inadequacy within me to admit it openly. Still, you guys are just so awesome, and Naofumi, you especially. From the day when we dueled, I've gotten to see what a true Hero is like. Even though I treated you so unfairly, you don't hold it over my head. I tried to hurt you repeatedly, and yet you still found it within yourself to forgive me.
Naofumi, Ren, Itsuki. You three are like the little brothers I never had. And I'm so sorry for everything I've ever done to hurt you.
I promise, once I think about it some more, once I've had more time to process these feelings of jealousy that I've been struggling with, I'll share them. I'll share all four of my methods with you guys. Just please, don't get mad at me for abandoning my duties in Melromarc. You guys have good hearts. I'm proud of you three, and I know you'll do just fine handling these minions by yourselves.
It's just, I can't leave the Spirit Tortoise itself up to our gaming knowledge. If you guys can focus on the familiars, then I have to take this matter into my own hands. After all, what good is a useless hero if he can't even help a few people I say!
Please, stay safe, and if I was right, well… hopefully I'll be able to help at least a few people get out of there alive.
Motoyasu
…
...
When Naofumi was done, his fists threatened to tear the letter apart. For the first time in days, part of his anger was appropriate for the situation. Partly at Motoyasu for what he was doing… but mostly he was angry at himself.
Here, he'd been doing a horrible job at expressing himself to his friends. And Motoyasu had just… clearly communicated his issues over a written letter. It made him feel furious, but for now, that wasn't the primary concern.
"That… that… that &^%$ing bastard! What the hell is he thinking?!"
Naofumi quickly began breathing in and out deeply. This was serious. If Motoyasu was going to fight the Spirit Tortoise by himself…
"How far ahead is he?" Naofumi finally asked.
"I haven't seen him since he left the castle. At the most, he's had three days on us, so he shouldn't be too far outside Melromarc's borders… unless…"
"Unless what?" Naofumi asked.
…
"Unless he… took a dragon rider from the country he went to help out." Itsuki said.
"Dragon… rider…" The Shield Hero muttered the vaguely familiar term.
"In my game, that's what I would take to get to the Spirit Tortoise the fastest." Itsuki continued. "I know Mirellia has a few since I've had to travel around a good bit helping her… so he could easily grab one and get there within several days of Melromarc's Wave."
Naofumi quickly pulled up his HUD. There were only five and a half days left until the next Wave was supposed to hit.
"&^%$! &^%$ *^%$ *^%$ *^%$ $%#$!" Naofumi began ranting off a string of four-letter cuss words. "And just when we were about done cleaning up the familiars! Go wake up Ren and the others. If that idiot is going to wake up that damn monster, then we need to stop him, now!"
Itsuki nodded and ran off to do as Naofumi instructed.
Naofumi, meanwhile, went and woke all of his party members himself. He was quick to inform them what was going on, and at receiving the news, they all hung their heads and nodded.
He was then about to ask Filo to talk to Fitoria so they could request her assistance with this matter when he suddenly realized that his daughter was absent.
"Wait… where the hell's Filo?!" He angrily asked.
Everyone looked around in confusion when a sharp crack suddenly sounded outside. At the exact same moment, Naofumi saw Filo disappear from his party screen.
"W-what? What just-" Both of these events happening simultaneously made Naofumi freeze in place. Wasn't that the sound of someone portaling, but why...?
Quickly connecting the dots, Naofumi stormed out through the back door.
Sure enough, Fitoria stood in his backyard in her human form. She wore the same outfit and had the same necklace hanging around her neck. The indifferent look on her face only made Naofumi more furious.
"What are you doing here, and where's Filo?!" Naofumi roared.
"Fitoria has taken Filo to her sanctuary." Fitoria answered calmly.
"What?! Why?!" Naofumi screamed. "Don't you know what we're dealing with right now?!"
"Because Filo doesn't want to be here anymore." Fitoria further stated, continuing to stare at him.
The bluntness of that second statement made Naofumi pause, but it was quickly overshadowed by a giant wave of anger and frustration. "You- you… what the hell?! You kidnapped my daughter!? What kind of sick loli bitch are you to take Filo away when-"
Suddenly, Naofumi found himself encased in a cage of wind. He was shocked at the action, then he angrily tried to hit it with his shield. However, the action only made him cry out in pain from the cut that appeared on his wrist. He hadn't even heard her say a word. Had he been too busy ranting to hear her chanting the spell?
"What kind of lunacy is this!? You think you can just take Filo away from me when we need her to get to the Spirit Tortoise?!" He started bashing himself angrily into the bars, cutting himself again and again. He opened his mouth to yell obscenities at the little girl in front of him. To curse her and her entire existence and-
"Shield Hero," Naofumi focused on her, and what he'd mistaken for calm indifference on her part was actually the opposite.
Her face was tight, and her eyes were aflame with anger. It was like looking directly into the eye of a storm.
"Unless you want Fitoria to kill you, stop. Now." Her firm voice shook him to the core.
Naofumi finally went still and became silent. He was covered in an array of cuts from throwing himself at the Wind Prison repeatedly. Fitoria continued to harshly glare at him. Visible waves of power could be seen surging out of her deceptively fragile-looking form.
He'd never seen her look so scary.
One wrong move and she very well might kill him.
"Filo asked Fitoria to do this. Filo also asked me to not punish you for the way you've been treating her lately. Don't make me break that promise."
Naofumi growled. "But why?! What have I done that'd make her ever want to…"
… he stopped speaking.
The answer was more than obvious.
He'd just been too much of an idiot to realize his actions could push Filo away till now.
...
"It has been heartbreaking for Fitoria these last few days, Shield Hero." The Filolial Queen admitted, seeing the look on the Shield Hero's face. "I saw you working together with the other Heroes. Becoming a better Father towards Filo. Trying hard to do your best even when your mind was weighed down... I thought, seeing the way you handled the Cal Mira wave, that you were finally taking steps towards true Diligence. That you actually cared for the people of this world..."
The bird girl then scowled. "But now, I see that I was wrong! Again!"
"You are lashing out in anger at your fellow Heroes. You are ignoring how everyone around you feels... Do you even realize how much poor innocent Filo is hurting right now thanks to you? Is it any wonder that after seeing your argument with the Bow Hero that she finally asked me to take her away and I agreed that it would be for the best?"
"But, but I have to be this way!" Naofumi shouted at her. "I can't just let everyone walk all over me-"
"Tell me this Shield Hero. Do you believe that since you can't attack anything with your body that you should instead attack those you care about with your words?" Fitoria narrowed her eyes with disgust.
"…" Naofumi was at a loss for words on how to respond to this accusation.
"I cannot overlook this. You have needlessly hurt those closest to you… just like those in the past who have hurt me." The Carriage Hero continued.
To his surprise, tears began to flow out of her red eyes. Fitoria raised an arm, wiping the tears away. How long had it been since she'd last felt for something so much that she cried?
"You wonder why Fitoria never involves herself in human affairs? It is for reasons like this Shield Hero. Your actions have forced me to remember times from the past when people just like you would approach me.
"They acted nicely. They acted kindly. I thought that all they wanted was my help with one issue or another. But in the end, it was all a ploy. Their kindness was only a means to an end to make me drop my guard. Every last one of them hurt me... and some of them even tried to kill me. I tried so hard to forget them. To forget their faces… to forget their betrayals... but all of this is making me remember one of the few things that I've tried so hard to forget.
"I have been betrayed more times than I care to count." She spat out venomously. "I don't care if you are Cardinal Heroes or not. I trusted you, but your actions have thrown that trust away. Filo is all the proof I need."
"Wait, I'm sorry, I-" Naofumi finally tried to speak.
"Are you sorry, Shield Hero?" Fitoria asked angrily. "Are you truly sorry, or is this you trying to guilt me into bringing Filo back so you can abuse her more?"
"But… but this is all your fault!" Naofumi yelled at her. "You were the one who told me not to get angry! You were the one that told me I had to be 'Diligent'! And-"
"I never told you not to be angry." Fitoria cut him off.
…
"Huh?" Naofumi stared at her.
"I told you never to use that shield, I told you to keep your anger in check… but I never told you not to be angry. I can accept that there are times when you need to be angry. After all, I am plenty angry with you right now." Her glare didn't lessen. "But what I can't accept is how you decided to use that anger of yours unfairly. To hurt your friends, to hurt the other Cardinal Heroes, to hurt Filo... how many more shall you hurt with your anger, Shield Hero? How many more lives do you need to ruin before your anger is satisfied?"
"But… but we still need her to get to the Spirit Tortoise! Motoyasu is going to wake it, and it's my fault for not being angry at him! We need to stop him before it's too late!" Naofumi screamed.
"... if it really is your fault, and if your anger is to blame, then you have no one to blame but yourself." Fitoria coldly stated. A chill went down Naofumi's spine as Fitoria continued to speak.
"Your actions have made your decision for you. You have decided to save the world over its people."
A memory of their past conversation came to mind. Fitoria had told him that sometime soon, a decision would have to be made. The Heroes could either choose to save the world, or save its people. And his actions...
No, it couldn't be… had his angry recklessness really affected this much?! It'd only been a few days of lashing out! A few days of treating everyone around him like ^%$# for the &^%$ they'd done to him! A few days of saying things, both justified and unjustified... mostly unjustified… and more hurtful than helpful... yet this couldn't possibly be a consequence for expressing himself, right?!
"Fitoria will no longer give her help to the Cardinal Heroes of this era."
It was like a harsh slap to Naofumi's face. The consequences of his anger loomed far over his mind now. Fitoria was right, there was a time to be angry. There was a time to express that anger. But there was always a better way, as Motoyasu had shown. And he'd taken the worst route possible just because of how easy it was to do it. And he'd hurt so many of those he'd cared about... needlessly, only because he felt like it.
Now, it was time to pay the grim reaper.
"I will protect Filo and my sanctuary, should the Spirit Tortoise or its minions come that way. But I refuse to help the Cardinal Heroes any longer." Fitoria stated with finality, though her face was sad. "Goodbye, Shield Hero."
"Wait, please, Fitoria, I'm sorry, I'm-"
A bright light surrounded Fitoria's form. After a few seconds, the light faded, and the prison of wind around Naofumi disappeared.
Naofumi sat still on the ground for a long while. Tears entered his eyes.
No… had he really just doomed the people of this world?! Had his actions signed the death warrants for millions…? Would those he cared about perish because of him?
He fell to the ground, slamming his fists into the dirt. "Damn it!"
"Damn it! Damn it! Damn it! DAMN IT!" His scream of frustration and anger rang out over the ocean.
However, this time, all that anger was directed at himself. For being so stupid. For being so weak.
If only he'd been a better communicator. If he'd only listened more. If he'd talked to Raphtalia and the others about his issues instead of just exploding on them and pinning all the blame on them...
He wasn't aware that his party had been watching from the windows that whole time. And when he finally went back in, none of them tried to ask what'd happened.
It was more than obvious what'd transpired.
Naofumi only took a little time to heal his self-inflicted wounds, and then, he portaled to the castle to check in on Melty and everyone else there.
In a voice to disguise how guilty he felt, he broke the news to them about Motoyasu and the Spirit Tortoise. Told them that it'd be a while before they came back and that in the meantime, they should begin working on training and helping out however they could until it was safe to go back to the village.
Melty tried to ask where Filo was, but he dodged the question. He didn't want to think about his daughter or the bird queen anymore. It wasn't like the Second Princess was coming either. Ever since they'd learned what their enemy was, the Queen had adamantly refused to let her daughter get involved whatsoever.
Call it overprotective parenting or whatnot. But if Naofumi had a daughter and the possibility of her having to face parasitic familiars or a monster the size of a mountain range, he'd choose to leave her in the castle in a heartbeat.
That is, if Fitoria hadn't taken her away. Or if she hadn't been needed to get them to the Spirit Tortoise…
Being reminded about what'd happened earlier only made Naofumi angry again. And then...
"But where is Filo-" Melty tried to ask again.
"Just shut up, Second Princess! That's none of your concern!" Naofumi snapped at her.
"N-Naofumi, please-" Raphtalia tried to speak to him. To try and reason with him before he said something he'd regret again. However, he glared over his shoulder at the half-tanuki girl, and she went silent once more.
"What do you mean it's none of my concern!?" Melty countered, oblivious to what was going on. "Filo is my friend! I have the right to know if something happened to her!"
"The right to know...?" Naofumi narrowed his eyes in anger. "Very well then your grace." He made a mock bow before continuing. "Allow me, this lowly servant of the crown, Naofumi Iwatani, to inform your grace, the second princess of Melromarc, Melty Q. Melromarc; that the young lady Filo, the first of her name, is %^&*ING GONE!"
He exploded in the end, shouting loud enough to make the nearby windows shake.
"Wh-Wha…" Melty jumped back from where she stood, startled. Staring up at him in open-mouthed shock.
"Fitoria took her away last night because she apparently didn't want to stay with me anymore! Too %^&*ing bad, huh?! Guess now you can't steal her yourself so that little plan of yours is dead in the water!" Naofumi spat out.
"Wha? What plan, what are you talkin-" Melty tried to answer but Naofumi cut her off again.
"Oh don't be coy now, do you think I'm stupid? I've seen the way you've been eyeing her since the day you met! Always trying to force yourself between her and I, making her question my authority! It's all because of you! Because of all the %^&* that you've been spouting to her behind my back that she got the idiotic idea to run away!"
"N-no! I would never-" Melty shrunk back as Naofumi stepped forward, looming over her.
"Actually... yea. You're right. Of course you wouldn't." Naofumi's face twisted into a nightmarish, mocking grimace. "Even a little brat like you isn't stupid enough to sabotage her own family. Or, well, a delusion of one existing in this case I suppose."
"... Huh?" Melty looked on the verge of tears.
"Oh please, second princess, did you really think that I wouldn't notice?" Naofumi crouched down to get on her eye level and stared right into her face while roughly planting the palm of his hand on top of her head.
"You poor baby. Your sister always despised you to the point of trying to kill you no matter how hard you tried to get close. Your mother never showed you a single ounce of affection, only caring about raising you as an emotionless well-oiled political machine that would succeed her for her own selfish needs. And your "papa", the only person who'd ever shown you even a shred of affection, is now a goddamn vegetable. Is it really any wonder that you'd latch on to the first chance of experiencing what an actual loving and caring family life is like?"
"Sir Naofumi! Enough. Stop thi-" Éclair began to protest in the back.
"Shut up! Don't talk unless you're spoken to!" Naofumi harshly shouted over his shoulder, giving her the mother of all glares that made the knight's blood still in her veins.
"Now where were we…" Naofumi turned back to the blue haired girl, his face returning to the mocking pitying grimace. "Ah yes, that must have felt nice to pretend like you have a sister that adores you, a mother that always has time for you, and a father who isn't brain dead."
"P-please, sto-" Melty's voice came out quiet and weak as tears began to slowly streak down her cheeks.
"Shhhh." Naofumi put his index finger on her lips. "Oh no. I'm not done yet, not by a long shot. If you haven't figured it out yet, I'm not in a very good mood right now and I've been waiting a long time to give you a piece of my mind. So be a good little princess, stay right here and read my lips. Ready?"
...
"You're worthless. No one loves you." The shield hero stated blandly while looking her in the eyes.
Melty stared back unblinkingly, her body was starting to shake. "Y-you." She sniffed loudly.
"Me? What about me?" Naofumi stood up again. "Could you speak up please?" Naofumi put a hand to his ear and lowered his head at her.
"Y-you're wrong, F-filo loves me!" The little girl objected.
"Oh, does she now? How strange." Naofumi scratched his chin in an overexaggerated display of his common behavioral quirk. "Why did she go with Fitoria and not you then?"
…
Melty opened her mouth but no words came out.
"She might not want to stay with me anymore but what about you? She could have gone to you. But she didn't. She went to Fitoria. The person she actually cares about. Am I wrong?" Naofumi pondered out loud.
"I-… I-…" The flow of tears running down Melty's face strengthened.
"And before you ask, no. Neither me nor Raphtalia care about you either. As far as I'm concerned you're just an annoying useless freeloader that I got saddled with because I owed the Queen a favor." Naofumi sneered at her. "And don't you ever forget that and get any weird ideas again. Now get lost. You're starting to annoy me."
… *hic* ...
… *hic* ...
… *hic* ...
… *hic* ...
… *hic* ...
What followed was a deathly silence only broken by the princess as she gasped and hiccuped a few times. A few of her tears fell on the floor with subdued dripping sounds. Why... why was Naofumi being so... so cruel... it hurt... it hurt so much...
Finally, she managed to find the strength to turn around and slowly walked away, still trying to hold down her sobs.
Weirdly enough, Naofumi felt a lot better after saying all that. It was like he'd channeled all the anger he'd felt towards Fitoria, Motoyasu, and himself onto the little girl in front of him. Leaving his mind clearer, and… ...
Oh %$#*, he did it again.
A few seconds after that realization, his HUD alerted him that Eclair had just left his party. He turned around to face the rose haired swordswoman in surprise.
He'd never seen the knight so pissed off before.
"I signed up to help you because I was impressed by the strength of your character, Sir Naofumi." Her fists clenched at her sides. "I admired you for your unyielding care towards everyone around you." Her glare was like daggers. "But what I just saw here… what I've seen these last few days..." She stood tall and resolute, somehow making him feel small in the process.
"The man I met in prison that day is clearly dead!" She shouted, venom filling her tone.
"I refuse to stand with hypocritical trash like you! Fitoria was right, you truly are a mockery of what the Shield Hero is supposed to be!" With that, she ran off after Princess Melty. Only a few seconds later, the Second Princess's sobs rang down the halls.
...
Naofumi, trying to keep a blank expression plastered onto his face, turned back to Raphtalia and Dou-Lon. "Well? Any other deserters that I should be aware of?" He bitterly asked.
…
They didn't move to leave like Eclair. But neither of them could look him in the eye.
Here he was, after all this time, down to only two people because of his douchebaggery. If he removed their Hero Service Crests, he wondered how quickly they'd leave him?
Did Raphtalia even love him anymore? Had she ever loved him?
How could anyone possibly love a worthless ^%$&^%$ like him?
He didn't deserve it. At all.
"In that case, here are your orders: Go and join the Queen's forces. She's going to need help with the other nations if Motoyasu wakes the Spirit Tortoise." He commanded.
"B-but what about you-" Raphtalia protested weakly before going quiet after Naofumi gave her a displeased look laced with tiredness.
"...Me and the other two heroes will do something else. Just… don't worry about it." He said, looking off to the side.
All Dou-Lon and Raphtalia could do was worry when he said it like that. "A… Alright." Raphtalia bowed her head.
"Dismissed…" With that, Naofumi turned around and walked off without another word.
'And I'm sorry.' The unspoken words remained in his mind.
He didn't have the strength to utter them.
"Naofumi, you can't just send them-" Itsuki started to tell him.
"Since we don't have Filo or Fitoria's help anymore, the three of us are going to have to take those flying dragons Mirellia has here if we want to catch up to Motoyasu. Bringing too many people with us will only slow us down. It'd be better for our parties to catch up to Mirellia in case something happens to us." Naofumi said to Ren and Itsuki. "Or do we not want to try and stop that simp from ruining everything?"
The Three Heroes stood in the war room where they'd met Mirellia previously. Ren and Itsuki had brought their parties with them, but now Naofumi had changed their plan of attack.
And it made sense to them too. If they couldn't rely on Filo's fast speeds to try and catch up to the Spear Hero...
…
Itsuki clenched his fists again. "You heard Naofumi." He told his party in a low voice. "Go with Raphtalia. Make sure to help out Mirellia however you can."
Ren, in a quiet voice, told his party the same thing. They looked absolutely crushed, being told by Ren to not follow and help him.
Rachel, Itsuki's dark mage, had a black hood of mourning over her head. She said nothing and simply nodded, her face blank of any expression. Tersia and Farrie did nothing except look sad.
Aksel and Bakta, the two tanks who normally joked around with each other, were oddly subdued. Crystal and Welt weren't poking fun at them. Karn had his usual smirk on his face but didn't say anything to break the quiet. There was just no banter between anyone whatsoever. Not even Maya tried to bust in to tease her favorite knight. The Raccoon girl had tears in her eyes as Itsuki told even her not to follow them.
Wyndia, Ren's ever loyal dog girl, sat in a corner of the group quietly. She didn't try to grab Ren's gaze or anyone else's gaze for that matter.
She looked just like Raphtalia.
With orders given, the Hero's party members left the castle. Mirellia's knights helped them to secure carriages for their journey.
As for the Heroes, they went to the royal stables. There, they found three flying dragons being tended to by the knights. One was a light blue, another a bright yellow, and the last a deep red.
After throwing their authority in their faces and saying that it was to save the world, the knights let the three Heroes take the flying dragons.
Naofumi had never ridden one of these beasts before. Unlike Filo who didn't even need a saddle, the scales of these creatures were rough. There were also spikes on their backs that the other Heroes had to be careful of.
Not that it bothered Naofumi, thanks to his god tier defense.
They were almost comfortable to lean back on, actually.
When they took flight, they left the Capital and flew straight east. Naofumi had to be constantly vigilant to make sure he wasn't thrown off. It was a weird experience, flying on such a creature. But it didn't take him long to get used to it.
Flying dragons were definitely faster than Filo, but as he soon discovered, they needed to stop more often for breaks.
Even though Naofumi finally relented and started cooking meals that'd fill the dragons with energy, they just couldn't hold the weight of an armored Hero all day. The continual pauses for rest never seemed to end.
The days slowly ticked by. The Heroes ended up sleeping little, if at all at night in their efforts to try and catch up to Motoyasu. But there was no sign of the Spear Hero on their journey east. And pushing the dragons hard only made the journey longer, as, during the second night, they passed out and couldn't be woken up till the afternoon of the next day.
Naofumi gradually began to take note of the other Heroes that time while they sat around a campfire on the ground.
"Why is everyone being so damn quiet?" He complained out loud.
"... Isn't it obvious?" Itsuki dryly replied. "It's because we're tired of pissing you off."
Ren's head was held low. He didn't say anything as he ate what he'd gotten his sword to make for him.
He missed Naofumi's cooking. But he was afraid to say that out loud. He didn't want to give his friend another reason to be mad at him... even the feeling of finally being able to ride a dragon wasn't enough to comfort the Sword Hero.
...
Naofumi said nothing to Itsuki's accusation. Simply scowling about the unfair treatment they were giving him...
No, actually, it was fair for them to treat him like ^%$#. After all, that was all he was. One, stinking, massive pile of bloody %$#$ that couldn't even be allowed to contemplate the weight of his mistakes since the world was in danger.
Being a Hero truly sucked.
Eventually, when their dragons finally woke up, they continued on. Being more careful this time about how hard they pushed their mounts.
Two days before the Wave was supposed to hit, they were flying above a country that Naofumi didn't recognize. They were surrounded by nothing but plains. Itsuki hypothesized that they were only a day and a half away, so if they could just stop Motoyasu before that and reason with him, then they would be back in time for Melromarc's Wave, and the Tortoise wouldn't wake up, and this wouldn't turn into one big hellhole-
Kchch!
Suddenly, the air was filled with the sound of shattering glass. A shockwave rocked the air, making the dragons panic.
"Whoa! Whoa!" Naofumi pulled tightly on his reins.
It took several minutes, and eventually the Heroes were forced to land. Even after, the dragons continued screeching and looking around, their eyes wide with terror.
It gave Naofumi a terrible sense of foreboding.
It'd sounded like the beginning for a wave, yet it was something… different. For one, they hadn't been teleported. For another, a quick check revealed his portal skill still worked.
"Are… are you two alright?" Naofumi asked the two Heroes behind him.
"I…" Ren paled. "Do you guys have a blue hourglass in your HUD's too?" He asked.
"... yes," Naofumi said after a few seconds, seeing the new icon. It had a seven in the center of it. The Wave timers for Melromarc and Cal Mira had also stopped counting down. "Is that… is that a bad thing?" Naofumi asked.
…
Itsuki curled in on himself. "Motoyasu… you hopeless, sentimental fool."
...
Eventually, they managed to calm their dragons down and began flying east once again.
The rest of the day passed, and they heard nothing. The plains eventually turned to mountains once again. Yet the timers for the Waves didn't change. Ren and Itsuki hypothesized why after they'd landed for the night…
But it wasn't until the next day in the evening, after flying over groups of people fleeing from the mountains, and finally getting over the rest of the mountain range that they finally got their confirmation.
The Spirit Tortoise had awoken.
Where it had been sleeping, there was nothing but a large empty crater. The country that had been made around it was nothing but ruins now. It was like the entire face of the landscape had been changed.
The ruins of grand buildings laid burning at the bottom of deep craters, sending plumes of smoke into the air. Once smooth roads were not only broken and cracked, but simply didn't exist in areas due to how much the face of the landscape had changed. Hills and valleys had been forcibly created in haphazard patterns all over the face of the land. Entire forests of trees laid on the ground. The air up above filled with the smoke of the carnage spread out below them.
It was like an earthquake had hit, and then Godzilla decided to add to the mess.
And looking northwest, the Heroes could easily see the path of destruction the monster had left in its wake.
Naofumi's eyes were wide with disbelief. It was like a valley of destruction, several miles wide. Another mountain range stood further ahead. But now there was a large gap in the range.
It had literally walked through the mountains that stood in its way...
Just how big was this thing?!
Distantly, they could feel earthquakes shaking the ground. Resounding to each step the beast took.
Until now, the threat of what they were about to face hadn't really registered in Naofumi's mind. But seeing this, Naofumi knew.
This wasn't going to be an easy fight at all.
Naofumi's angry recklessness had saved the lives of those in northern Melromarc... whilst dooming the rest of the world to a hellish nightmare.
"Damn you Motoyasu…" Itsuki muttered once again. The dragons flew into the air, heading in the direction of all the destruction.
'Damn you… Naofumi.' The Shield Hero thought to himself.
Author's Notes:
People ask me at times why I don't like Angryfumi. This chapter is why. Sometimes, you do say the right thing when you're angry. More often than not, however, when all you do is lash out and scream at others, you only hurt them. You only hurt yourself.
I like Fitoria's advice. Keep your anger in check, but don't say it doesn't exist. There are times to be angry. There are times when anger is appropriate. Just find a way to express that won't hurt you or those you care about. After all, not all change has to come from yelling at someone's face. That is no way to resolve an argument, as many broken couples today have found. Learning proper communication skills and talking things out with your partner and others you care about will benefit you far more greatly than holding it in until you can't take it anymore.
Now, the Spirit Tortoise is awakened. Naofumi has lost several of his key allies, including powerful figures like Melty and Fitoria. Ren and Itsuki have regressed character development-wise due to Naofumi lashing out at them. And there is as of yet no sign of the Spear Hero.
With the setting and background now firmly in place, let us move on to what will likely take up a lot of the first half of Season Two of the anime when it hits in April.
Till Next Time
Allen