"I've got peirogi!" Trent called as he came into the living room. "...are you shitting me? Is he still out? We were gone for like three hours."
"He got up, ate all of your sour cream and onion chips and three grilled cheese sandwiches and a few cans of Mountain Dew and then passed out again," Angus replied. "Ann said it'd be cool, but if not, I can definitely replace what we ate."
"What? No fuck that," Trent replied. "We're all on like super best friend status as far as I'm concerned. My house is your guys' house. We faced down literal-" He barely caught himself as he set the peirogi and pretzels they'd picked up on the way back. "-a lot. We've faced down a lot together."
"That's true," he agreed.
"Yeah, and I...um...oh yeah," he muttered, pulling his wallet out.
"What's up?" Ann asked.
"Just remembered Candy gave me a check and I should cash it," he said.
"You good to drive?" she replied.
"I don't have to," he said, pulling out his cell phone. "I can actually upload them with my cell now."
"Holy shit, seriously?" Gregg asked groggily.
Trent chuckled. "Yep. Hey. You doing okay?"
"Yeah...uh...um...where am I again?"
"You're in my house. Angus is there."
"Oh." He rolled over. "Hey, Angus! You're so cool!"
Angus chuckled. "Thank you, Gregg. You're pretty cool, too."
"I gotta...I'm thirsty."
"Let me get you some water," Angus said, getting up.
"No, I want...Mountain Dew Code Red!" Gregg griped.
"Too bad, you're getting water," Angus said as he made for the kitchen.
Gregg groaned but otherwise was silent.
"All right, uh...oh, I should also call back Molly. Shit."
"I'll chill out for a bit," Melody said.
"Thanks. Uh...wait, where's Mae and Bea?" he asked as he signed the check and then booted up the app.
"Mae's hanging out in bed and Bea's doing stuff in your office," Ann replied. "I think she's checking on the website."
"Okay, cool. And...done. Okay, that's taken care of. I'm going to call Molly."
"Have fun talking to your girlfriend," Ann said, grinning at him.
"Wait...he's talking to Bombshell? I thought she was a lesbian," Gregg murmured.
"She is. Trent's so hot he made her question her sexuality," Ann replied.
"...holy shit," Gregg said. "Really?"
"Um, apparently," Trent replied. "I think it's more...something else. I'm not sure. Right place, right time?"
"Nope, you're just too hot," Ann said.
"Sure, okay," he replied, heading for the backdoor.
"Babe," Ann said. He stopped and looked at her. He raised his eyebrows. "You have three girlfriends. And this ridiculously hot chick here for the sole purpose of fucking you and pretending to be your girlfriend for a few days." She looked at Melody. "Genuinely no offense."
"None taken," Melody replied, looking deeply amused. "That is why I'm here."
"I...don't know what to say to this," he said finally.
"Because you know I'm right," she replied.
He sighed and headed outside. He called up Molly. She answered on the second ring. "Hey."
"Hello. I said I'd call you back when I wasn't stoned anymore, and I'm...mostly not."
She laughed. "You sound like you again." A brief pause. "How much do you remember?"
"I remember everything, Molly."
"...oh. Well...this is embarrassing."
He laughed. "I mean you seriously thought I wasn't going to remember?"
"Yes! Listen, I hang out with a lot of stoners and drunks and the amount of shit they do and then forget about-it's a lot."
"...so I'm about to say something that might make you reconsider a lot."
"What?" she asked cautiously.
"I think most of those people are lying."
"For real? Why?"
"Molly, how many times have you lied because it was easier to say 'oh man I don't even remember that I was so drunk' instead of 'yeah I remember that and I feel really bad and I'm embarrassed and sorry even though I know this has been like the tenth time I've said some dumbass shit to you because I was drunk'?"
Molly was quiet for a long moment. "Well shit," she muttered.
"Yeah. Also, don't worry, it's not going to change anything between us. It's not like I'm going to hold this over you or anything."
"So really? You don't feel any different about...us, now?"
"No." He hesitated. "Okay, I'll be honest, I actually feel kind of cool about the fact that I caused not just a lesbian to masturbate successfully to me, but that I caused a fucking supermodel lesbian to do it."
"Yeah, cause you really need another boost to your ego...also, um, I texted Mae last night, mostly to see what kind of words I could get out of her if she was as baked as you, and like, she said you got jumped? Like, was she talking about a concern she had or did that really happen? She wasn't too clear. She was really mad, though, I knew that."
"Ah...yeah. That. Uh, yeah, someone pulled a gun and a knife on me. Well, three someones," Trent replied.
"Holy fucking shit, seriously? Are you okay? Fuck, if I'd known that I would've asked sooner or something-"
"It's okay, Molly," he replied. "It's fine. It turned out for the best. It was me and Gregg. Some asshole grabbed Bea a few days ago because he wouldn't take no for an answer. I...may have overreacted and I socked him in the face."
"Hey, he grabbed your girlfriend, it sounds like he got what was coming to him," Molly replied.
Trent sighed. "Yeah. I regret that it happened, but I don't really regret doing it. The douchebag came back with some friends and weapons that night. And, here's a major twist, you remember that douchebag wolf guy who got mad you were a lesbian?"
"Yeah, that's the dude who you fought with before, right?"
"Yes. He basically saved me and Gregg."
"...for real?"
"Yep. I'd probably be in the hospital or maybe even dead right now if not for him," Trent replied.
"What the fuck? That's so weird...wait, does it have anything to do with why you're trying to help him? Is it, like, working?"
"I mean maybe? We talked for a bit about it and he said he wanted to be a good guy for once. So...yeah. Still figuring it out. Anyway, I'm fine, Gregg's fine, we're all fine. And the house is officially saved, and then some, and we're okay for cash."
"Are you sure? Because I kinda feel like shit about it."
"Please don't feel like shit about it. Everything's seriously cool, we don't regret giving you the money or the stuff. It's yours, you don't owe us shit. Seriously. I know you have trouble with the concept and you have trouble with trust and I don't blame you for that, but...you're basically just going to have to trust me."
"I do trust you, actually. I mean, I wouldn't have done and said...the things I did around you if I didn't really trust you. And Mae. And everyone else. You all are really cool...okay. I'll just take your word for it...hmm. Mae said you've got a girl around."
Trent laughed and sat down on one of the chairs. "I do...why?"
"Should I be jealous?"
He laughed again. "What the fuck? No. I mean, no in general, but also she's not into girls."
"She's clearly into you if she came all that way, though. Mae gave me the impression she'd come from a long way away."
"She did, and she is, but like...you aren't into me?" he replied.
"I told you I jerked off to you," she said.
"Okay yeah, and that's cool, but that's not really the same as being into someone."
"Well, I...also told you that you're...making me...feel things," she murmured awkwardly. "Also, you know, I just teasing...can I see her?"
"G rated or X rated?" he replied.
She laughed and he could almost hear her rolling her eyes. "Do you even need to ask?"
"Fair. I'll have to ask her. But before I do, how are you? How are things going?"
Now Molly sighed wearily and her tone changed to something more vaguely annoyed. "It's going how it always goes. Fucked around for a bit, found a new job at a Buffalo Wild Wings. I'm a server there for nights. It's good money, I can't complain about that, but already the problems are starting."
"What problems?" he asked.
"The problems that follow me everywhere. The other girls are angry and jealous because I'm getting so many tips and the guys are all trying to fuck me and getting angry when I say no. I just piss everyone off wherever I go. And I know this sounds ridiculously arrogant but it's just...my life. Like I said, the money's good, at least. I've got no problem paying bills now. Otherwise things are still normal. Still bickering with my roommates...tell me a sex thing you did with the new girl," she said suddenly.
"For real?"
"Yeah! Come on. Give me something."
"It will make you jealous," he replied after a moment.
"Fucking try me, loser," she said.
"You're a lot like Mae...I fucked her and Bea, side by side, for two hours last night, all three of us stoned as fuck, and I came in them like three times apiece apparently," he replied.
Molly was silent for a few seconds. Finally, she sighed. "Okay, yeah, fine, I'm kinda jealous. That's really hot." She was silent for a few more seconds. "Fuck, it's getting closer to my work than I thought. I gotta start getting ready or I'm going to be late. Send me a fucking pic."
"All right, all right. Don't be afraid to call or text any of us, Molly."
"I'll try not to. You guys are all weird and intimidating and I don't really know how to deal with that. But thanks, for trying to make me feel better."
"Did it work?"
"...yeah. It did. All right, later."
"Later, Molly." She hung up and he got up and poked his head into the house. "Hey, Melody, come here a second?"
"What's up?" she asked, appearing in the hallway.
"Molly wants an X rated pic of you."
"I take it you trust her." He nodded. "Okay, I don't care."
"Kay." He paused. "Just so you know, this'll be going to someone who will be sexually aroused by it."
"I'm fine with that."
"Okay, cool."
Trent headed back outside and hunted through the photos he had of Melody. Some of them clearly came from last night and he didn't actually remember taking them. Although as he looked at them, a vague, half-memory slowly rose to the surface of struggling to find his phone while continuing to hump the fuck out of Melody. He found one that was pretty hot of her on her back with her legs spread, Bea beside her, one of Bea's hands grasping Melody's thigh and holding her leg in place as Trent shoved his cock into her.
He fired it off to Molly and then thought about what he was going to say to the next person he intended to call. Before he could, though, Molly quickly responded.
You fucking prick!
He laughed and responded. What?
Her response was immediate. I wanted to appreciate her nude glory not get turned on!
That's on you, he replied.
He waited for her to respond but she didn't, so he figured she was probably busy and instead called up Tabby. She answered almost immediately.
"Trent, hi. Is everything okay?" she asked.
"Yeah, everything's fine," he replied. "...is there some reason you asked that way?"
"You sent, like, a few weird messages through chattrbox and I was kinda worried? I tried texting Mae and then Bea about it but Bea didn't respond and Mae...also said some confusing shit?"
"When did I...nevermind. Uh, we were way too fucking baked last night," he replied, "so...sorry about that."
She started laughing. "Oh...okay see that actually makes a lot of sense. All right then. I take it you did it, then?"
"Yep," he replied. "And you played a very significant role in it. So, on behalf of myself and everyone else, I wanted to thank you again."
"You're very welcome, I'm just glad I could help and it all turned out fine." She paused. "So...wait, Mae was completely just making up or getting confused about you getting attacked by someone? That's what was really worrying me."
"Oh. Ah. Yeah. That one actually happened."
"What the fuck!? What happened?! She said something about a gun!" Trent gave her a quick rundown of the events. "What the fucking...shit, man. That sucks."
"We got lucky and it's in the past. Hopefully. What about you? What are you up to?"
"My life is mercifully boring right now. My biggest concern is wrapping up the Demontower collection pack. Although right now specifically I'm reading through all your shorts and making notes and corrections. And I'm really glad I did. Cavern of the Spellslinger? I'm making this into a few bonus levels."
"Wait, really?" he asked.
"Yes! And you are getting credit for the writing. This shit is dope as fuck. It just feels like it should be, like, a DLC or something. It fits so perfectly between Demontower Two and Three and it gives me an excuse to make a new character-it just feels right."
"Well...fuck. Thanks."
"Hey, thank you. You're the one who wrote it. I can't fucking believe you just pounded all these out over the course of a week. I thought they'd be riddled with errors but I'm not finding much. Like, you produce a fucking clean first draft, Trent."
"Apparently," he murmured. He glanced up as he thought he saw movement in one of the window's of Mae's parent's house. Was someone watching him? Was Candy? Well, that wasn't too weird, but...he thought back to how she'd been acting earlier today. "Anyway, um, what I also called to thank you for was the present. Bea's present. I seriously don't think that would've worked if you hadn't helped."
"You're welcome. Also, like, promise me you won't tell Bea that it came from me. I want this to be a you-to-her gift completely."
"Are you sure? I'll feel kinda weird about it," he replied.
"I get that, and...I guess, if it's really too much, you can say I had a hand in it. But I don't know, I get weird about giving people gifts. I'd just, you know, appreciate it. I want people to have gifts, I want to get people gifts, I just don't really want people knowing they're from me. And I don't really know why."
"All right then. I think your 'feels weird about it' outweighs my 'feels weird about it'."
"Okay...it's a really sweet gift. I just wish I could be there, but I've got something coming up that's one of those rare 'I actually can't get out of this' sort of thing."
"It's fine, honestly. I mean it takes a plane for you to get here, so it's not like you could just buzz over in twenty minutes or something." He paused as he heard something crash in the house behind him and sighed. "I should probably go. I've got a houseful of people with weed hangovers, myself included, and I need to help manage them."
Tabby laughed. "Have fun with that."
"Yep. Talk to you later."
"Later, Trent."
He hung up and headed back inside.