AN: Thank you for all the support! It is very deeply appreciated!
"Ms. Hermione Granger?" Lucius' drink almost fell from his hands. "You're marrying Ms. Hermione Granger?"
If Severus wasn't going to spend the next century being annoyed by a bushy haired know-it-all and her incessant chatter about house elf rights, he would consider the expression on Lucius' face worth the aggravation of the marriage law. It wasn't every day Lucius' eyes bulged, or his face became as pale as his hair. Perhaps this marriage had a few advantages Severus hadn't previously considered.
"Unfortunately, I am to be married to the illustrious Ms. Granger, or should I say the future Mrs. Hermione Snape, tomorrow morning," Severus leaned back in his leather recliner and crossed his left leg over his right.
"H-how?"
"Must I give you a detailed account?"
"I'd like a few details on why you are marrying the student you've so lovingly referred to as a 'bushy haired know-it-all.'"
"Unfortunately, I did not read the newspaper articles on the marriage law deeply enough. Somehow, I missed the intercourse clause."
"You actually missed reading something."
"I was having an off day," Severus deadpanned.
"Winding up with a wife when you did not want to be wed to anyone is more than having an off day," Lucius noted.
"We're all prone to errors," Severus' frown deepened. "Mine just rewarded me an obnoxious Gryffidnor as a wife."
"I wouldn't call Ms. Granger obnoxious to her face."
"Why not? She appreciates honesty. I honestly find her obnoxious."
"There is such a thing as being too honest with a woman."
"I know not to say the dress makes her look fat. Instead you transfigure it when she isn't looking so it fits better."
"Exactly," Lucius took a sip of his drink.
"Dresses aside, is there any way you can overturn this law, or at least postpone the date of my wedding until it is overturned?" Severus asked.
"Sadly things tend to move slowly in the Ministry after six in the evening," Lucius huffed. "Much too slowly for my liking anyway."
"Can't you call in a few favors so we can get this resolved by tomorrow?"
"Even if I could, I'm not sure they would be able to react in a timely enough manner to prevent your marriage."
"Can't the wedding be held up in court because someone is appealing the marriage law?"
"Do you not think anyone has thought of that?" Lucius took another sip of bourbon.
"I take it they did not succeed," Severus' stomach sank.
"They were laughed right out of the courtroom and told that starting a turnip farm was not a reason to get out of marriage. Granted, others are trying to get it overturned on different grounds, but there is no guarantee of success."
"So there isn't any way to escape this."
"Unless you have a time turner and can stop yourself from rolling in the sheets with Ms. Granger," Lucius paused. "No."
Severus leaned forward and asked in a low voice, "Do you have such a time turner?"
"If I did, I would have used it to prevent Draco from reconnecting with Ginevra."
"Unlike me, they seem happy at the prospect of marriage. I'd imagine they're already planning their wedding," Severus took a sip of bourbon.
"For two hormonal people who cannot grasp the realities of a pureblood marrying a pureblood traitor, they are content enough," Lucius admitted. "Though it still puzzles me as to how she fell out of love with Potter so quickly."
"From what Draco told me, the relationship ended when Harry told her he wanted children immediately after the war. Apparently she felt as if this would interfere with her ability to be a player for the Holyhead Harpies. After a few conversations, she and Potter realized they had little in common. They parted on amicable terms, and she reconnected with Draco who supported her Quidditch aspirations."
"And now that the marriage law is passed, she will have a child regardless of her desires."
Severus put a hand on his head. "When is the deadline to have a child?"
"You get a special bonus if you have two children within the first five years. If you do not have a child within seven years, you will be tested for infertility. If you and your partner are fertile, you will be given a fertility potion to speed things along."
Severus looked up. "That must kill you."
"I know. One Weasley-Malfoy hybrid is too much to bear," Lucius swirled his snifter. "The last thing I ever wanted was two."
"I don't mean the children. Whether you want to admit it or not, you've always wanted a grandchild."
He hummed, unwilling to concede the point.
"Yet, there's a tax break you cannot exploit. That must irritate you."
"I'm sure grandparents who watch their grandchildren for more than one hour a week would qualify for some kind of tax break."
"You honestly expect someone to give you a tax break for spending time with your family?"
"People will give you anything if you ask nicely enough," He smirked before taking another sip of bourbon.
"Except getting out of my marriage with Ms. Granger. No matter who I ask or how politely I attempt to do so, the answer always seems to be no," Severus took a gulp of his bourbon.
"I did not say you would never get out of that marriage," Lucius replied, "Just that the law will not be overturned by 10:00 AM tomorrow morning."
"But do you think it will eventually get overturned?"
"I think if you two can refrain from killing each other, you and Granger will outlive the marriage law."
"But it will not be overturned tomorrow."
"I fear not."
Severus sighed before taking a sip of his bourbon, reveling in the spicy liquid rushing down his throat.
"You'll have to be a Slytherin about this whole thing," Lucius suggested.
"Meaning?"
"See what advantage being married to her can give you."
"I fail to see how being annoyed out of my skull is an advantage."
"Hermione is a member of the Golden Trio…"
"Please don't remind me."
Lucius cocked his head.
"When we saw the judge about our marriage, all she did was talk about how she was a member of the Golden Trio, how she was going to have the best wedding in Wizarding Britain if she married Ron Weasley, and how it was unfair that she be subjected to the same laws as everyone else," Severus took another sip of bourbon, hoping to erase the memory from his mind.
"I take it the judge was not impressed."
"That would be an understatement." He shook his head and held out his snifter. "I think we had a better chance of escaping the marriage if Hermione had stood quietly while I explained what a mistake sleeping together actually was and how she should not be tied to a professor almost decades her senior."
"Odd, Granger isn't one to throw her weight around like that," Lucius poured his friend more bourbon. "She's more subtle in her tactics."
"Granger has been acting odd as of late," Severus swished his bourbon.
"I know. She found you attractive enough to sleep with you. That makes her odd indeed." Lucius burst out laughing.
Severus glared at his friend, which only made him laugh harder.
"If you are quite done..."
Lucius chuckled before quieting himself.
"I believe the situation is more serious than a mere ego trip," Severus continued. "I've never seen Granger seduce anyone the way she did me. I didn't expect her to be so direct, or so overt in her desires. In retrospect, the whole interaction was odd."
"Perhaps not," Lucius answered. "She's an adult and was eager to show you that she was a woman. She's eager to please her snarly old potions professor in a way she never could as a student."
"No, this is deeper." He inhaled the scent of the bourbon. "She said she was happy, happier than she'd ever been. Then she said something about the world being technicolor."
"What does technicolor mean?"
"It's a muggle term which shouldn't concern you." He took a sip, savoring the feel of the bourbon burning down his throat, and the strong aftertaste.
"From the sound of it, I don't want to know what techno-whatever is." Lucius replied.
"Probably not," Severus replied. "The whole conversation was odd, though I will admit that when it comes to memory spells, she has done a fair amount of research into that."
"Were you impressed?"
"I was intrigued anyway." Severus uncrossed his legs. "She is no dunderhead. Her ideas are unique, and much more creative than when she was a student. With some refinement she may have the keys to unlocking her parents memories."
"Then harness that energy," Lucius suggested. "Perform your research with her, or at least take over her project. If you don't find a way to reverse her parents' memory loss, then you can publish a few papers on the subject. If you do restore their memories, then your apothecary's sales will go through the roof."
"True," Severus glanced into his glass at his reflection. The man staring back at him had scowl lines etched on his face, and circles under his eyes from struggling to keep up with a feisty woman the night before. He could foresee disaster, yet was running out of ways to prevent it.
Would there ever be a time in his life when he did not wear such an expression?
"Ms. Granger has a Ministry job, correct?" Lucius cut into his thoughts.
"Yes," Severus returned to the moment. "She's in the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures."
"She may have some connections who could overturn this laws."
"Are you certain of that?" He glanced at Lucius. "She couldn't prevent this marriage."
"Yes, but that was one judge who wanted to make a point. If she were to argue against the marriage law in court though, she may find some people more sympathetic to her cause. Being a war heroine doesn't hurt."
"Perhaps, though I don't know how deeply her connections run."
"True, and," Lucius frowned, "I have a feeling she's going to be a pariah in the Ministry soon."
"Great," Severus slumped. "Marrying me is already causing her trouble."
"Actually going up against Arthur by cheating on Ron is."
"Arthur?"
"My sources tell me that Hermione being a member of the Golden Trio didn't harm her chances of getting a Ministry job, but most people found her too bossy and overbearing. The deciding vote to hire her was Arthur."
"Arthur?"
"Yes, he's very well-respected in the Ministry. He's a war hero second only to the Golden Trio themselves. That's why he got that nice hefty raise. Even if he'll never be a quarter as rich as I am, with the right investments he has enough to retire and live comfortably."
"So you're afraid Hermione's made an enemy of him."
"I know she has."
"Arthur, he's relatively harmless, correct?"
"He's a Weasley, and Weasleys are loyal to each other above all else. The second someone from the outside crosses them, they will attack that person as if they had aligned with Voldemort himself. Draco said Hermione already got on Molly's bad side once by allegedly pitting Potter and Krum against each other. Now that she's cheated on Ron in such a public manner...let's just say she isn't in an enviable position."
"So you think Arthur is going to sabotage Hermione's job?"
"I don't know what he'll do," Lucius answered. "But you need to be prepared for him to do something which could harm both of you."
Severus' stomach knotted. "You don't think he'd bring up the charges against me again?"
"He can't do that given the laws surrounding double jeopardy. Even if he did," Lucius grinned. "There's some information I've been biding my time to use against one of his sons for quite some time."
"What information?"
"It's juicy enough for me to know, and not allow anyone else to find out until the proper time."
"Would you use it if Ms. Granger lost her job?"
"If I thought for a second you cared about her employment status, I would consider it."
"Admittedly, I don't care," Severus took a sip of bourbon. "I only want her out of my way so I can live my life as I see fit."
"Then I will keep it close to my heart until the time is right."
"I'm surprised you didn't use it against Ginevra."
"And risk Draco disowning me?" Lucius exhaled. "Sadly, Draco's desire for Ginevra is stronger than any blackmail scheme I could concoct. No matter what I do, Draco and Ginevra will find a way to be together, with or without my blessing. They have made that all too clear."
"Supposedly true love conquers all."
"It conquers more than it should anyway."
"Indeed."
The men sat in silence, each taking the occasional sip of their drink.
"Anyway, I will be your witness tomorrow." Lucius set down his drink. "Also, I will ask Ginevra if she will stand in for Hermione. I have a feeling she and Draco will be the only two individuals with any interest in doing so once word gets out about her cheating with Ron."
"Hermione said she didn't cheat on Ron. She said they were over."
"As far as Arthur is concerned, she cheated on Ron. That I can guarantee."
"I wish I had not destroyed Hermione's life," He gulped the remainder of his bourbon. "She deserves better than this sham of a marriage."
"She was in that bedroom too. The fault is on her as much as it is on you."
"You do have a point there."
Lucius stood. "Get some rest. Nobody likes an exhausted groom. It doesn't make for a great wedding photograph."
"I will do my best to get some beauty sleep."
Lucius set his glass down before apparating away. Severus slumped into his chair, wondering why he couldn't exist without destroying someone else's life.