AN: Howdie. This is a large one, strap in. As always MegaDiary123 helped once more, so thank you. And Thank you for the comments and the support! I hope you all enjoy :)
All rights go to Marvel
Skye's POV
For the first time since I reached the Tower, I woke up on my own. I had fallen asleep to Nat and Clint arguing about nothing in particular. The quietness that I was met with when I opened my eyes, was a bliss.
No person to ask me how I was feeling, no one obviously very tired because they were unable to sleep at night, afraid that I would not be there in the morning. And while I appreciated their time and their love, I had not been able to be on my own and with my own thoughts since the whole debacle had started. And a lot had happened since I got shot by Quinn.
"Hey Jar, is there anyone up yet?", I called out.
"Almost everyone" he didn't miss a beat in replying. If I was lucky, that meant that Jemma had actually managed to get some rest. I mentally crossed my fingers for that to be the case. "Is there anything you need? Do you want me to call for someone?", the A.I. continued when I didn't say anything else.
"No, no" I quickly said. "Please, unless they ask, there's no need to tell them I—" my sentence was cut off by the sound of the door knocking. Had J.A.R.V.I.S. worked that fast that he called for someone before I answered him? "Come in"
The fogged up glass of the door was slowly pushed open and Captain Rogers' head pocked through. "Good morning" he said as he made his way further in the room. "How are you doing?", he asked as he came closer, but never sat on one of the multiple chairs in the room.
"I'm good" I answered not quite sure what was happening. After all, we never had spent a lot of time just the two of us. We always had more of a coworkers/acquaintances kind of relationship. "How are you doing? After everything that happened yesterday?" Cause it had to do something with that, right? I saw his fists clench a bit more and my assumptions were proven correct.
"I… have been better" he answered after some contemplation. "But I have also been worse". I could tell he was hesitating, mulling words over in his head. "Look, can I just be straight with you? I'm really bad at not saying what's on my mind" he eventually concluded.
I went to sit a bit straighter on my bed, which I didn't get very far doing before my injury flared up. Rogers was quickly by my side. "Here, let me…", he offered. And with his help I made it all the way up.
"I never had you for a guy that would be dishonest in order to spare someone's feelings" I said. "Always thought of you as the most straightforward person I have ever met"
"I'm always honest", he replied. "And I wasn't planning on being anything else, I was just wondering whether you wanted not to do this right now"
I shook my head and showed him my position. "I'm as good as I can be. And whether we do this now or later, the outcome will not change, so we might as well get this over with as soon as possible. Then we can see how we can move forward, if that is still something you would want".
He seemed, almost taken aback from my response. He still hadn't quite figured out how not to wear his heart on his sleeve. Quickly, he straightened his back and cleared his throat. "You know I had a hard time with you" he started strong, not beating around the bush. "The way we met, was particularly peculiar. You were under Loki's influence, and then I had to trust you enough during battle that you would not stab me in the back. But you proved yourself that day.
"Was I expecting you always to be honest about everything? No. From what I can tell, you are a lot like Romanoff. And you know I am not the biggest fan of secrets. Not when it comes to people, not when it comes to organisations. I think secrets make things more complicated than they need to be, and they endanger everyone involved. Even without their knowledge".
"You know you currently work for S.H.I.E.L.D., right? I mean, they're pretty much one of the top intelligence organisations. Nothing in there works without secrets. You can never know everything", I interrupted him.
"This might be the case, for now, but S.H.I.E.L.D. seems to want to work for the better of humanity. Peggy and Howard made the organisation to help the people, not to hide from them", he countered. The conviction in his voice made me think that it was something he had had plenty of time to ponder about. "And while I work with them, that doesn't stop me from telling Fury exactly what I think, even when he refuses to tell me anything in return. If I can make him think, or at least consider his lies and his secrets, it will be a win for everybody".
I understood where he was coming from, but still. I found his whole mentality to be more idealistic than realistic. "We don't live in a world that truth is what matters, Rogers. We live in a word where information holds power. Things are more complicated than you make them to be".
"If that is the case, then tell me. What power did the information that Coulson is alive held? Apart from the hurt that people felt when you told them that he was still alive?", he actually lifted an eyebrow at that.
I scoffed. "This is how simple you see the world? You think that the only complicated thing with Phil's resurrection is that people were kept on the outside? How about the untested drug that was used to bring him back to life? Let's say, for just a second that you are right, okay. Let's just assume. Imagine we let everyone at S.H.I.E.L.D. know that Phil is alive. Every agent that knew him, every single new recruit would know that he fell before the Battle of New York and with a miraculous procedure he was brought back to life.
"Did you even read the files of what had happened? Did you read about the tests, the procedures, the memory-wipe that he had to go through? Do you think every single agent would read all of that? Or would a lot see it as a testament of how much technology has advanced, and they would expect to be also saved in case they died during a mission, not really thinking the consequences? And what about foreign agents? While we would like to think that everyone at S.H.I.E.L.D. is loyal, people can be bought. People's loyalties can change. They can sell the information to other nations, other organisations, and then even more people would die trying to recover the information. Imagine the experiments of people that would try to recreate the same process, only to fail again, and again. But that would not mean that they would stop. Because it happened once, so it can happen again.
"Do you think you are the only person that was ever tested with a super-serum? You cannot really believe that they stopped after you disappeared, right? People have been trying to replicate the formula that is running through your veins for years. Some of them, we have been able to apprehend and reverse whatever damage they did. At times, it was so severe that we had to kill people for their own good. Others, we got there too late, only to see the results".
While the topic was quite heated, I didn't find myself upset. At least not yet. Because Rogers seemed to actually listen to me, instead of having my words go in one ear and come out the other.
"So…", he started after a long pause. "You mean to tell me, that you didn't trust us enough to tell us before?"
I speculate that he was trying to make me feel guilty or make me think more about what I had done. But it was something that I had thought a lot about. "No" I simply started. "Not all of you. Not with this"
"Care to elaborate on that?" His arms had folded on his chest, clearly not comfortable with how the conversation was going.
"It's simple really. You said you didn't trust me, at the beginning, why, do you think I trusted you? You have this mindset, where you think that your way is the correct way and that if people just knew the truth, then it would all work out. While I know you won't say anything about him, not now, I wasn't so sure in the past. Not with you, and not with Tony, because he tends to spill things without meaning to".
"Huh… you really have thought this through, then?"
"Well, as much as I possibly can. It's not an easy subject to discuss. And, since we are being honest and all, while I don't regret telling you the truth now, I don't regret not telling it to you sooner. Because for some reason, the way that you are thinking about this right now, you are taking feelings out of it. You think it was easy for me, to see him out of the blue, right in front of me, and in his eyes to see a stranger?"
With that last part, I saw some more flicker of emotion run pass though his eyes. His arms relaxed a bit from the rigid pose that he had taken, and he seemed to swallow hard. He took a deep breath and nodded once. "It seems that I have some things to think about. If you are open to the possibility, I would like to continue this at a later time".
"Sure thing" I replied. Honestly, I don't think I could ask him if he really set his mind to it. I dropped my head on my hand, pressing my fingers to my eyes, feeling a headache already blooming. Great, I thought. The small break I seemed to have gotten yesterday from what I should probably start calling Revelation Day, seemed to be a glitch.
This room was going to drive me crazy unless I got out soon. The fogged-up glass, and the painted-white walls was all I had seen for the past 2 days and I could not stand it anymore. I was feeling just fine. Or at least fine enough to be able to stroll out of this god forsaken room.
"Please", I practically begged at Jemma. "I need the air, to see the sun, or at least the common room! Something different".
"The last time you went out, you got upset and your stitches were torn apart from your quakes", she reminded me, like she had done every other time I had asked her in the past.
I took a deep breath and collected myself. "Last time, we were having a heated conversation with people. I will behave, I promise!" She stopped her movements momentarily and seemed to contemplate what I was asking her. "Look, if I'm not allowed to get out, okay, I understand. But can I at least have a laptop to watch a movie or something?", I tired.
She shook her head in the last part. "I don't trust that if I give you a laptop right now you won't just go back to work"
"Then have Stark monitor it, or Jar, or Tee. And have them send you a notification if I visit any site other than to simply kill some time" I countered. "But, if you still want me away from a laptop, all you have to do is take me across the building. Push me around. I won't even resist or try to get up".
Jemma, who had been a bit stiff in her movements the whole day, let out a breath as she sat down in the chair next to mine. "I guess I can't—"
Her sentence was cut short by the sound of the door opening, and May walking in, pushing a wheelchair. "It's okay, agent Simmons. I will take it from here. You" she said pointedly at her, "are supposed to be resting, no?"
"Yes, agent May" she mumbled and sighed heavily. "Take care and enjoy your ride", she smiled at me and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek before leaving May and myself alone in the room.
"What just happened, here?" I asked at May as she was positioning the wheelchair and took her position to help me if I needed it.
"I don't know what you are talking about?"
"Okay so, first—argh. First, were you listening in on us? And also, what just happened with Jemma? I have been begging her to get some sleep and you just walk in here and she agrees with you? Without even a complain?" I managed to reposition myself without much trouble.
"I am her superior officer" she answered simply. If I knew it was going to be that easy to get her to sleep I should have asked her help from the day before. "As for the former, yes. And I thought it was about time you got some air", she patted me on the shoulder as she pushed me towards one of the large balconies that the Tower had.
The winter air hit me and made me feel more alive than the past couple of days had. It was rejuvenating. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, feeling the cold pass through my nostrils and fill my lungs.
The grey sky above had never looked so beautiful before.
Just as this thought came to me, I felt a shiver run through my spine. The difference in temperature compared to the interior of the Tower was greater than I was expecting.
"Here", I heard Bruce say from the side as a blanket was placed on my lap to cover my legs, and another was throws over my shoulders. "We don't want you to catch a cold" he offered gently.
"I—", I started but had to clear by throat. "Thank you. I wasn't expecting to see you here".
He looked over the railing and on the expanding city below. "I wasn't planning on being here, but I saw that agent May brought you out here and thought I would join you". He then turned back towards me, with an unsure expression. "If that is okay?"
"Of course" I answered. I looked back at May only to see her retreating inside the building. Her smile and nod were all I needed to know she was only one call away. "Please, don't stand for me" I looked back at Bruce and motioned to him one of the seats placed here.
I rolled over, closer to where he was, and twisted back around so I would look out at New York.
The silence that followed wasn't the tense silence I was expecting to be met with everyone after the Revelation. Instead it was a comfortable silence, with two people just existing in another's space. There was nothing heavy, weighing on the atmosphere apart from the slight humidity in the air.
"I'm sorry" Bruce said out of the blue, his voice barely audible. I turned the chair around to face him better, not saying anything. "The way I reacted was uncalled for, it wasn't right. And I'm sorry for that".
I let the statement hung in the air for a bit before replying. "I can't say I wasn't hurt, 'cause I was. Mainly because you'd think that it was something I was making up. But I understand, Bruce. I do", I took his hand in mine and squeezed briefly. "I'm sorry I made you question our friendship".
"Oh, no" he quickly said. "You didn't make me question our friendship Skye, not at all. I was just blindsided and didn't know what to believe and what not. But there's no scenario where this would impact on what we have, as friends". He moved around and bend down to give me a hug. The hug, despite how awkward it was because of the position, was still so warm and wholesome, that I almost teared up. "I'm sorry I made you question whether you could tell me about something like this. I'm always here for you Skye, no matter what. And I want you to feel comfortable coming to me and not fearing my reaction".
"Thank you", I whispered in his ear, as I hugged him even closer.
"No worries, Shaky" he said lightheartedly, a small laughter escaping from both of our lungs at the nickname. "After all, I need to keep you around to make sure Stark doesn't do anything crazy. I swear, the programming you have added on J.A.R.V.I.S. that starts blasting Adele when he overworks is the best. I think he secretly likes it, but refuses to admit it".
"Please don't make me laugh", I said between gritted teeth, trying to hold it in. Thankfully it didn't take too long before I managed to compose myself. "Speaking of which, I have a new idea but I'm still not sure how to make it happen", I stage whispered at him as if it was a big secret.
He played along and leaned in. "Oh, do tell".
"Do you know where the place he keeps his main coffee stash is?"
By the time I had finished with my talk with Bruce, which we had resumed inside the building because of the constantly dropping temperature, it was getting late. Everyone else but Tony had joined us. Even Rogers made an appearance towards the end, and while he kept quiet most of the time, he didn't seem like he was uncomfortable.
We watched some movies, talked about everything and nothing and had and an actually really good time.
At some point, Clint and Bruce had left, with clear instructions about what to do, and had soon returned with a triumph smile on both of their faces. I also managed to vocally override some of J.A.R.V.I.S.' commands and set some new rules for certain situations.
So, when Adele started playing over the speakers, the moment the time reached 11 at night, I mentally smirked. Because I knew what was coming.
I was half-expecting Tony to come up here, demanding for answers and to turn things back to normal, but was surprised to see that he didn't. I was really hoping that this would make him at least appear, or talk to me, but it seemed that even this did not make the cut. At that I sighed. Seemed that only part of my plan had worked.
It was a while later when I declared I was gonna call it a night. Almost everyone made a move to stand and help, apart from Rogers —for which I didn't blame him—. "I'm good really, I can make it back on my own. Don't break this up on my account" I assured them. "I will tell Jar if I need help and he'll call for someone", and with that I rolled off.
It did take me a bit to get to my 'room'. I didn't wanna rush it, I liked the quiet of the corridors. When I eventually made it back, the lights turning on automatically the moment I stepped in, I noticed a laptop on the bed, with a paper resting on top.
I opened it to see Tony's childish scratches that he called letters.
— Give me my coffee back —
Neither a please, nor anything else. But it wouldn't have been Tony if there was. I smiled. It was a start.