AUTHOR'S NOTE: warning, this chapter is dark...
Chapter 223: In The Morning, Darkly...
"[...] hopefully not too late to say he was sorry."
-CampionSayn, Can You Understand?
Hannah arrived at Hedge's island just before sunrise. She had spent much of the previous day and night travelling to the lake. Reaching the island itself had been a major challenge during her last visit, but this time it was very easy: a frog carried her across on his back. She ran into the dark forest of the island, leaving the frog behind to eat insects.
Due to the different time of day, the island was even darker than during Hannah's last visit. As she made it even deeper in the forest, the only visible light was that of a few isolated fireflies, fewer than she remembered. The stream was still flowing, but filled with weeds and the occasional tree branch.
-"Oy! Hedgewizard! Where are ye?"
-"I'm right here," came the turtle's voice, echoing through the forest.
-"Where? I can't see ye!"
-"I'm coming."
Moments later, the faint shape of Hedge emerged from the other side of the forest, her shell covered with moss.
-"You're Hannah, aren't you?"
-"Ye. A while ago, you gave me magic words, but oof! It just won't work anymore."
-"Exactly what did you do?"
-"There were a few incidents. Most recently, a rabbit friend of mine was stuck in dirt, and I just shouted the magic words at the top of my lungs. She stayed stuck."
-"Did you do anything to help her?"
-"Oof! Did you even listen to what I just said? I used magic!"
-"I know, I mean...other than magic."
-"No, I didn't. Magic should have been enough, shouldn't it? But it didn't work, the other rabbits had to dig her out."
A look of sadness appeared on the turtle's face.
-"Hannah, there is no magic."
-"What?"
-"Your pebble is just an ordinary pebble. It has no magic powers of any kind."
-"How is that possible? The magic worked on a few past occasions, it saved Primrose's life!"
-"How did that happen?"
-"I used a spell so that she would come back to the warren safely, and she did."
-"That was just a coincidence. Whatever you may have done with the pebble, it had no impact on Primrose's survival, or your other friend's rescue."
Hannah was aghast. In her anger, she reverted back to her previous hard-to-understand accent.
-"WAT? Do ye realize dis stoopid pebble almos killd me a fu tims? Oof! How dare ye lie like is? Dat's cruel!"
-"I told you that the pebble was magic because I was hoping it would boost your self-confidence, and that you could try to accomplish more things because you thought the magic would help you. But now that you're back here asking questions, I have no choice now but to tell you the truth."
-"Anootee wabbit frind open portels to ouder realm, shirley dere mogec invoolveed in 'at?"
-"Maybe magic works in those other realms, making it possible to open the portals. But magic pebbles don't exist."
Hannah stared at Hedge, with fury in her eyes. She had risked her life over the pebble, only for it to turn out to be fake. All this false hope, all these dangers, all this anxiety, over a lie.
-"I'm sorry," Hedge said.
-"AH DON'T WANN YE APOLOGY, YA FILTHY REPTILE!" Hannah shouted, throwing the pebble at the turtle's shell and running away as fast as she could. She soon broke out of the forest and found the frog lying still; she stayed there for a few minutes, trying to calm down. She wondered whether the frog had fallen asleep, until he suddenly shot out his tongue and swallowed a fly.
-"Done?" he then asked.
-"Ye, I'm doon. Less go home."
The frog carried Hannah back across the lake. As she hopped off his back at the end of the trip, he got a better look at her face. He was usually pretty good at identifying other creatures' moods. The previous spring, he had helped a rabbit change and better contribute to his warren (this was actually Strawberry, but he did not remember this name); now, he sensed that this mouse Hannah was similarly depressed.
-"Want talk?" he offered.
-"Nay, won chang a ting. I goo home now. Thankee for ze ride, Froggy."
The frog was slightly disappointed by this. Strawberry appeared to have greatly benefited from venting to him. But he could not force Hannah, or anyone else, to talk, if they did not want to.
-"Good luck," was all he said.
Hannah did not reply, and walked away, reflecting on the situation. Maybe she had overreacted by calling Hedge a "filthy reptile"? But then, that turtle had it coming, after pointlessly deceiving her.
Later that morning, at Watership Down, Hickory sought out Hazel. He soon found him in a clover patch, locked in a tight embrace with Primrose, their lips pressed against each other; neither seemed to realize his presence. It appeared that Bluebell's romantic displays towards Blackberry were rubbing off on other rabbits. Even Bigwig, who had previously talked about how pointless romance was, was now in love with Spartina. Which made Hickory feel even worse over his own situation.
He had hurt Marigold a few days before. He had talked with Strawberry, and it really seemed that the only way he would have a chance of repairing his relationship with her, was to apologize. He had not seen her since then; they moved to separate burrows, and she always had someone escorting her to make sure he stayed away. This guard was usually Blackberry; since Hazel-rah was currently unavailable, Hickory decided to talk to her instead.
Peaking inside Blackberry's burrow, he saw that she was lying down, although she appeared awake.
-"Blackberry?"
The doe looked at him, and got back up.
-"What is it Hickory?"
Blackberry had taken on a defensive posture. She was clearly trying to conceal it, but Hickory could still see it. He did not mention it, he did not want to hurt his chances.
-"I...I was hoping I could talk to Marigold. I don't know if she wants to see me, so maybe you could, uh, give her a message for me?"
-"What is this message?"
-"I'm really sorry for the way I...attacked her..." He really had done this, but it was still painful to say it. "I'm really sorry, and I hope we can move past that."
-"I will go tell her you said that. Afterwards, if she says that she wants to talk with you, I'll bring you over."
The next few minutes brought great anxiety, as Hickory wondered whether Marigold would forgive him. When Blackberry came back, he practically leaped at her in anticipation.
-"What did she say?"
-"Nothing. She does not want to see you."
Hickory's excitement quickly turned to sadness and disappointment.
-"Did you tell her I'm sorry?" he asked.
-"I did. An apology is a good starting point, but she's still afraid of you. And I don't blame her."
-"Why? I really do regret my behaviour."
-"And what will you do to make sure it doesn't happen again?"
Hickory remained silent. He had an idea what Blackberry meant, and it scared him.
-"You've attacked her twice so far, first during the weasel attack, and more recently at Sunflower Forest," Blackberry continued. "On both occasions, something happened that reminded you of the trauma you sustained at Redstone. Then, you took out your stress on the nearest rabbit, who did nothing wrong and does not deserve to be treated like this. If she does take you back, and then you have another traumatic flashback, what would stop you from attacking her again? Or even killing her? You almost did already, until Silverweed restrained you."
As much as it pained him, Hickory knew that everything she had just said was true: there was nothing stopping him from going crazy and attacking Marigold again. He would never forgive himself if he killed her.
-"What do I do now?"
-"I don't know. As much as I would like to, I can't heal your mental trauma like I healed the physical wounds you inflicted on her."
-"Right. Well, thanks for giving her my message..."
With that, he hopped out of the burrow, completely dejected. This couldn't be the end of his relationship with Marigold, it just couldn't! She had supported him through all these seasons at the warren of the shining wires, and had helped him rebuild Redstone. He had to find a way to get her back...
Later that morning, Hazel went to see Fiver at silflay. The younger brother appeared in a good mood, but Hazel had something on his mind.
-"Is this a bad time?" the Chief asked.
-"As good a time as any," Fiver calmly replied. "What's up, Hazel?"
-"I was thinking about Sunflower Forest. Just before we left, Willow told you something, and you seemed disturbed."
Fiver sighed. He had not wanted to worry Hazel with this, but despite his best efforts, this had still happened. He would have no choice but to tell everything.
-"Do you remember the story of El-ahrairah and the Black Rabbit of Inlé?"
Hazel remembered. This was one of the most famous tales of El-ahrairah, but also one of the most depressing. In order to save his people from the villainous King Darzin, El-ahrairah and Rabscuttle had to seek out death himself. El-ahrairah lost his ears, tail and whiskers, and while his mission was ultimately a success, he was left demoralized and barely survived the journey back to his warren. The mere thought of this tale made Hazel shudder.
-"I remember."
-"Then surely you also know that, when Dandelion told the story to Pipkin, he omitted some of the more disturbing details, so as to avoid traumatizing him," Fiver recalled.
-"That is true." Dandelion's knowledge of his audience was one of the things that made him such a great storyteller.
-"Something similar happened the other day. You see, Sunflower Forest Warren was cursed, and Willow was forced remain there as a ghost. He has seen things beyond the comprehension of us living rabbits. Things so terrible that there are no words for them."
-"If it was so horrible, why did he tell you?"
-"He was hoping I would understand him better, due to my visions and all that." Fiver paused to take another bite of clover. "He was wrong."
-"I'm sorry."
Hazel hugged his brother tightly; Fiver appreciated this, but his mind soon went back to his conversation with Silverweed the previous evening.
-"But I also know something else, even more disturbing than what Willow told me."
-"What would that be?" Hazel asked nervously.
-"Last night, Silverweed told me that..."
-"Hazel, I'm sorry to bother you," Thethuthinnang said as she arrived running, "but have you seen Blackberry? There's someone underground who needs her help NOW."
-"I think his prediction is coming true right now," Fiver said sadly.
-"Whose prediction? And where's Blackberry?"
-"Let's all go look for her," Hazel said; the three rabbits scattered.